14 years old and i want to be a Teen mom

Kayla - posted on 06/28/2012 ( 259 moms have responded )

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Im 14 years old & i want to be a teen mom . Iv wanted a baby since i was 13. I am still a virgin!!. Im in a relationship with my boyfriend isaiah who told me he wants to have sex. Ibrought up the "What if i get pregnet" Talk with him & he says " He doesnt care,Hes goign to stick with me through it." I also told him that im scared & what if im to little for the baby? Then i started talking about how our parents would react if i ever do get pregnet. He said He didnt care what our parents think he loves me & hes going to be there for me. then we thought out everything & now i think were ready im ready to be a teen mom...i still havent told my parents i wana be a teen mom. any advice?

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Amanda - posted on 06/29/2012

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Ya know what, If she wants it, she'll do it.. So moms, we're all wasting our time..

Kayla, Go ahead, spread your legs and bring a child into this world that lord only knows you cant take care of. When he leaves you, and he will (you've been together for THREE months and he's already lookin at others), you go ahead and take your not so happy ass to get all the assistance you can get. Meanwhile, i'm sure you'll be complaining on your twitter or your facebook about how everything sucks. Remember though, when that day comes, you had over a hundred moms tell you that you werent ready.

Sharlene - posted on 06/29/2012

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@Kayla. Is that telling you something if you saw text messagers from another girl. He just want's to dip his dick. lol. and I give you courage for coming back on. course most of us including myself think this is a fake post

Sally - posted on 06/29/2012

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I hope you're kidding. You are too young to get a job so how do you propose to support a child? Also, having babies while you're still a baby yourself puts you and the child both at a much higher risk of all the things that can go wrong during pregnancy and childbirth. It also takes years off your life. While your young man may intend to stay with you at this point, he's no more mature than you are.
Wait until you grow up and can actually BE a parent.

Carleen - posted on 06/29/2012

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Please fine a church group in your area for teens. They will love you and support you and there will be adults who can help you find good paths for the future. Find a school counselor and say that you need to talk with her soon and show her all that you have written and what other people are taking the time to share with you.

Lindsay - posted on 06/29/2012

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Bringing a baby into your home situation would not be a good answer. It sounds like you need some guidance. If your dad is violent to you what do you think he would do to a baby? Please please wait to have a baby. Wait until you are out on your own, get some counseling.

Natalie - posted on 06/29/2012

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Ok I guess I should start with I was a teen mom and while I love my daughter with all my heart it was the hardest thing I have ever done...I got pregnant at 16 from my bf poking holes in the condom he said afterwards it was the only way to keep us together guess what he pushed me down the stairs at 5 months pregnant and walked out on me and our unborn daughter my parents were supportive but I did it all by myself feedings every 2 hours to rid her of jaundice breastfeeding her because her stomach would get upset with any formula working long hours at restaurants to buy diapers and having to get my ged instead of finishing high school I missed my proms I missed football games and simple teenage stuff there is plenty of time to become a mom there is not much time to be a teenager

Catherine - posted on 06/29/2012

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First stop watching 16 and pregnant. It is not that easy. At your age you should be thinking about what career you want. Having a child takes a lot of money, patience, time. You also have to know that the boyfriend you are with is not the one you're going to be with when you get older. He just want to have sex with you he does not love you. And a child should be loved by both parents and you are too young to know what love is and how would you teach your child how to love when all you think is a baby. Babies is not the answer to the real problem you're having. The child you think you want is going to go through more than what you are going through. Stay a virgin, think highly of yourself, find yourself first. God will bless you with the man that loves you no matter what and then you will have the children you desire. Be a mom when you know you can take care of the child yourself. If you and your mom are close then you will really hurt her. Talk to your mom or someone you can trust and tell them what really is wrong. Again a baby is not the answer to the problem you're having.

Kayla - posted on 06/29/2012

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I wanna have a baby at such a young age because i never felt loved when i was growing up . None f my family members talk or i even see anymore i have older siblings who already has kids but i never ever get to see unless its a birthday party for the kids or a holiday or something BIG happend in the family. my dad when he gets mad at me he hits but when he hits & leaves a mark on me seeing how bad im crying he would start saying im sorry & love you . I think having a baby would get my family to notice me & actually pay attension. & I know isaiah wouldnt stay with me ... Just yesterday we were hanging out & he let me use his phone & i saw messages to a girl hes been texting in TEXAS & were in kentucky , Calling her hot , & baby. I never said anything to him about it tho.

Casey - posted on 06/29/2012

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i got pregnant at 15 and was very nieve, my boyfriend who i thaught loved me was an ass hole, sadly i lost the baby but it turned out to be a blessing in disguise!, i am now 25 with a beautiful girl and another on the way to the best guy in the world. This want for a baby will pass, and this guy of yours will not last! finish school, find a career and simply enjoy life before having children, even for me having my daughter at 21 was hard i couldnt imagine if id have had to do it at 15 and i look back and think you stupid girl (even though the pregnancy wasnt planned). DO NOT DO IT. You will be glad you waited, and that goes for giving up your viginty too, you dont have to have it because your friends are or he wants too you need to be ready, 14 year olds dont need it.

Wendy - posted on 06/29/2012

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Don't!!! You still have to much growing up to do yourself. Your doubt is proving you are not ready. And depending on your state laws, your boyfriend can be charged as a sexual offender and marked for life as one for getting you pregnant. There is no such thing as consentual sex for minors, and you, at least, are a minor.

Having a baby now means you will mostly likely not finish school, no college, no good careers, no prom or high school dances. No being a teen and enjoying yourself. Having a baby is a huge responsibility! Some of the "joys" of parenting - sleepless nights, sick baby, crying baby, running, stinky poopy diapers, runny snotty noses. Diapers, Dr's, clothes, food these all cost a ton of money, how are you going to support yourself and your child???? It's not your parents job to raise your child.

Start babysitting and see how much you like taking care of kids. Carry a doll around 24/7 for a month and see what it is like to have a child.

Don't get me wrong - I love my child dearly, but I was also 36 when I had him, had gone to college and could support myself and him.

Carleen - posted on 06/29/2012

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Try being a full time baby sitter during summer vacation. Volunteer with little kids. Not just for a few hours but a few weeks--full time. Test drive your dream. It may be a nightmare!

Melissa - posted on 06/29/2012

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Please tell me this isn't a real post. But just in case - your boyfriend is obviously pressuring you for something you aren't ready for yet, and if you're asking for advice, you know it. Forget about the fact that neither of you will be able to provide for yourselves, or that your boyfriend may be charged as a child molester. Here are some other reasons - what if your child has special needs? Mine have autism. I have friends that have children with chromosonal issues, cerebral palsy. Are you ready for the possibility your child may be premature and you will spend two months in the hospital? You can't drive there yet. I've seen solid marriages of over 10 years end over this stuff. I was really healthy before I became pregnant, but had complete renal failure and nearly died. And I do have to point out - teenage boys say "I love you" for sex, and teenage girls tend to have sex because they want the guy to love them. You really aren't there yet, and if you really want to be a mom, you should wait until you are actually able to be perform the superhuman job it requires. Have respect for yourself, if he's worth it, he will still be there.

SHERRY - posted on 06/29/2012

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GROW UP, Who do you think will support you and the baby do you or your boyfriend have a job.I think Not at 14. I have worked all my life and I dont want to support other peoples babies just because they didnt use there heads and are to immature to think clearly.

Susan - posted on 06/29/2012

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First......finish your schooling. It's obvious that you need to learn more about spelling and grammar! Also think about the fact that once you are a mom, you will be a mom forever! Good luck Dear.

Tasha - posted on 06/29/2012

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Hello, Im 24 goin to be 25 at the end of July. I have a 4 yr old baby girl. Its not easy. I am married. Most boys at your age aint goin to stay around. they are immature. They will say anything to get what they want. How old is your boyfriend? You are still in 8th-9th grade. Why have a baby now. Yeah i know what you are feeling. Yes I gone throw it. I was you 10 years ago. In 8 th/ 9th grade, wanting a baby due to the fact you want the love that comes with a baby. At that age you are not metally ready. Its not easy to be a mom. I wouldnt change my life. Im glad i waited until i was out of high school. If you dont talk to mommy and daddy before thinkin about gettin pregant. You might not be with support. If you want a baby then you better step up and think about your actions. you aint goin to be able to say mom i need you to watch the baby bcuz i want to go out and party. No. it dont work that way. Be a teenager. have fun. dont pin your self at that age. Its not easy. You have to be up every 4 hrs feeding at frist. You get at the min. of 1-2 hrs at night if your lucky and you dont have baby that has disablity. if your baby had a disabitly then you are goin to be up and down lot more than normal. then when they get older. you are goin to be chasing them around the house and etc. How are you goin to pay for the baby. I tell 1 thing. babies are not cheap. I helped raised my younger 3 siblings, plus nieces and nefews. Its nothing like that baby sitting or helpin raise someone eles baby/kid. you cant return the baby. Once you have one. ITS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. I thought it was goin to be easy. I even had brought me a doll that you actually have to take care of feed, diapers, etc like a real baby. and after i had my baby. i was shocked how much different it is from raising your own siblings to raising my own child. Another thing you need to think about sweetie. What "If" he leaves you. Im not sayin he wont or will. But the key word is "IF" how are you goin to be able to support that baby that way with no father. then When the baby gets older and ask where is daddy. what are you goin to say. Think sweetie. Im not tryin to put you down. I know how it is. I dont know if u came from a broken house or not (broken house = parents not together and have step parents, etc) I came from a broken home. My mom and dad seperated when i was 10 months old. Got divorced when i was 1 yr old. I lived with my grandma until i was 19. I was bouncin back and forth to 3 different homes. Its not easy for a child. Talk to your parents, and talk to teen moms. they will tell you its not the easiest thing. If the teen mom still goes to school they dont have have to just worry about passing Exams. they have to also worry about that baby they are tryin to support.

Jenny - posted on 06/29/2012

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DON'T DO IT!! IT IS A TRAP!! Let your body develop as it should normally. I promise you, any person I know that had a kid as a teen has regretted not waiting longer. I had my son at 20 and I regret not being financially able to care for him on my own and his father does the minimum to help me with him. I relied on the government and my parents to help me with my son. PLEASE WAIT!!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/29/2012

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Kayla, you have gotten a lot of advice. I would like to hear from you. Speak up kiddo. This is a serious issue and you have only commented 2 times out of 141 comments. Not one of us has agreed with being such a young mom intentionally, and all of us have given you ample reason to wait. So, speak up.

Julie - posted on 06/29/2012

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Hi, I can understand the urge to want to be a mom. I also can understand that your boyfriend says that he will be with you no matter what, pregnant or not. So why now? Your body doesn't stop changing and preparing to be a mom until after you are 18 years old or so. You are still growing and you want to start growing another life inside you. That won't be good for you or the baby. It's hard enough to have to unprotected sex and find out your pregnant and try to take can of a baby let alopne plan to have a baby at your age.

Here is why I know this is hard. I have a grand daughter who is 15 months old and my daughter, her mom, is now 19 1/2. She finished her senior year amidst having her baby in the spring, but it w3as difficult. She also works full-time, and cares for her baby and finds it very hard to do all the things she would like to do, especially go the college. She is starting college in the fall and knows it will be a struggle.

I always knew I wanted to be a mom when I was growing up, but instead of acting on this "want" I did a lot of babysitting, especially in the summer. I think this really prepared me for what being a mom was gonna be like and I can say that I am so glad I waiting.

My daughter wouldn't trade her baby for anything in the world, but her life would be much easier if she had waited until she had finished school and got through college first so there wasn't so much to juggle. Like I said earlier, she did not plan to get pregnant but took the responsibility on. Don't get pregnant on purpose when you and your body aren't quite ready for it yet. And if your boyfriend is still there after you graduate, then get married and have a baby. Having a baby isn't about what you want, it's about being ready to provide everything that your baby will need and planning for it at the right time.

Hope this helped!

Chantale - posted on 06/29/2012

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My advise, do you know any person with a baby? If so, offer the parent to take care of the baby for all day long and a week end including Friday night to Sunday night. I have 2 steps daughters 15 and 17. The 17 years old has a friend. Her friend had her baby at 16. She is 18 now any diploma, any apartment and anymore boyfriend. He told her he will be there for them and they will spend their life together but when they turn 18 and his friend hang out and meet others girls, he realized at that moment he wasn't ready anymore for a baby so, he drop her and let her alone with their boy. It can happens. My stepdaughter would a baby really young until her dad and I had her brother and she realize how much work it is and she see us to do not have any more time for us. She talk with her friend too and see how hard her life is right now alone without diploma, a place to live and a dad for his son. I know in the tv show it looks different but it's a TV show nothing in the real live is like that, with a baby everything is more complicated believe me!

Ms. - posted on 06/29/2012

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First of all you are a baby yourself & and sex should be the last thing on your mind. He (Isiah) will say & agree with anything to get you to have sex with him...BE CAREFUL! Babies are not toys, you cant take them back once they get here. I think you should focus on your education, set some goals for your future and work on them, by you saying you are scared that means you have some doubts, I pray you fear these thoughts until you are of age & married or at least been with the guy for 5-6 of years...HAVN SEX & BABIES IS NOT A GAME HONEY!

IF HE LOVES YOU LIKE HE SAY HE DOES...HE WILL STOP PRESSURING YOU INTO HAVN SEX.

Lindsay - posted on 06/29/2012

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I was a teen mom at 17 . My son became my world and I do not regret having him in any sense, but I do wish I waited. I was with my boyfriend for 4 1/2 years before I got pregnant and he said all the same things about how he would stay with me and he'd love me no matter what happened and guess what? As soon as I got pregnant and had our son, he stopped being the same, caused fights with me to get away and stopped caring all around. He now sees his son every week and pays his child support but it took alot to get to that point. As great as having a baby sounds, it means giving up your child hood and making scarafices. You need to be somewhat financially stable in order to properly take care of a child, as there are so many every day expenses that add up. Plus, you should want to finish school and be able to go to college. Your still very young and when you see all your friends out partying and getting together and your too tired because you've been up ALL NIGHT with your newborn, you will be miserable. You will miss out on alot, and yes having a baby brings out alot of good but I would say seriously! WAIT.

Allanna - posted on 06/29/2012

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I was 18 when I got pregnant (not planned), and was with my boyfriend for 3 years/living in our apartment together and he said all those things too, and you know what happened 6 months after oru son was born? He left and never looked back because he wanted to live his life.



I was almost done high school, and even then it was ridiculously hard to support my child and myself. You aren't even legally old enough to work in most places, so how could you become a provider for another life? Sorry but you need a reality check and definitely are underestimating the responsibility, effort, and funds it takes to raise a child. Get an education, start a real job, and then have a baby when you're with some body who you KNOW you will be with. 14 and you think you're in love? Do what you're supposed to be doing: BE A CHILD! Not a child with a child.



You could also argue that you could do school from home, or go back to school with daycare etc., but it's VERY VERY hard. For the first two years of my son's life I barely even saw my own child, and balanced back and forth trying to find babysitters who wouldnt charge (because I couldn't afford it) while going to class (which entaled waking up at 5:30am with my son to feed/dress him/get him to the baby sitter) then go to class, and from class to work a minimum wage job; when I should've been out with friends enjoying my life. I was pre-accepted to paramedics and lost my acceptance because my grades slipped when I got pregnant. It took me almost 5 YEARS after my son's birth to FINALLY land a job that I can build my career on even after getting to college diplomas and certification through a lab society.



Babies aren't all kisses, flowers and sunshine. It takes alot of work, responsibility and dedication not to HAVE a child, but to RAISE a child. Why don't you try volunteering in your community with babies or young kids until you're old enough and far better off to have one of your own.

Paula - posted on 06/29/2012

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Sweetie Pie... it's all fun and games for the first few days. Having a baby is "real life"... it's every second of your life not to mention extremely expensive. So when she's 6 and starts begging for dance lessons and pretty clothes... how are you going to pay for all that? Unfortunately, "love" is NOT enough when it comes to raising a child. If you have a baby at 14 (or even 18) you will be denying that child so much because you have not concerned yourself with figuring out what you are going to do with your own life first. If you truly have a desire to be a mom ..and a good one, at that... then be mature and wait until you have grown up, get yourself an education and find a good husband who will partner you through life. A 14 year old boy is not ready for that sort of commitment and you and your child will be sorely disappointed. I know it's not what you want to hear but it's reality. If my daughter (who's 9) ever comes to me with this sort of "desire" in her teens years I will tie her to the bedpost and guard her with a shot gun because babies are hard work ...the hardest thing you will EVER do.

Sav - posted on 06/29/2012

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it's great that you want to be a Mum and share your love with a child. You still have many years to become a mum so don't rush. Give your love in other ways. Mostly, love yourself - get a sound education, hang with friends, see places and be comfortable with who you are and what you want to be. It's great to have a bf who loves you - enjoy that for a while. Being a parent is fulfilling but can be painful. What happens when your kid can't have financial security? It'll break your heart :( I had my first child at age 29 and did not get a full night's sleep for 2 years. I quit my job to be a full-time mom cause I could afford to but I still had to deal with the heartache of having a child with a disability. Can you handle that? It's not easy. My hubby and I are secure in our love and have stayed together and worked together through all the difficult times raising 2 kids. Wait until you have more to offer a child physically, emotionally and financially - all children deserve that. I'm sure you'll be a wonderful mom some day - hopefully not in the near future.

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don't do it you still have your whole life ahead of you. and it is not right for the baby. you cant even get a job yet. how are you going to pay for this. and honey that boy will say anything to get in your pants. if you do get pregnant he will run. i was a teen mom and so were a lot of my friends. the dads are all gone now and we are left struggling to survive. you need to talk to your mom and take what she has to say to heart. you are still a baby your self and need to become something so you can provide for any children you have. it is a lot of hard work and no fun. you lose all your free time and friends along with your baby daddy. when you have a baby your life is over.

Frances - posted on 06/29/2012

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More advice, if you insist on doing this, read every parenting and pregnancy book you can from the library. You may see you are in for more than you are expecting right now. Also start taking vitamins with folic acid every day before you get pregnant.

Elizabeth - posted on 06/29/2012

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Kayla,
My kids have seen me struggle their whole lives. I couldn't do anything I wanted with them because I didn't have the income. Vacations, cheerleading, sports, etc. my kids had to do without because I couldn't afford it. Stay in school and wait till you can make it with out anyone else (except your husband) supporting you. Please wait, and you still have plenty of things your gonna want to do that having a child will stop. When you have a child it is not anyone elses responsibility but yours to take of them. So if all your friends and going out and you don't have a baby sitter then you don't go. You have to take care of your child. And if your boyfriend desices he wants to go off and ya'll don't have a baysitter the same goes for him. But it don't always work out that way. Ask your parents about all the things they gave up so they could be your parents. I'm sure they don't regrett it, I don't, but it is alot of self sacrifice involved with having a child. Don't believe all this T.V. show bull about being a teen mom. That is not even close to the whole story. BELIEVE ME!

Gabrielle - posted on 06/29/2012

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You can't trust a horny teenage male's promises when he's trying to get you to have sex with him. He's pressuring you, which is definitely not a sign of someone who truly cares about you. He may say he doesn't care what your parents think, but you are a minor, living in their home. You are their child and their responsibility. He can't possibly replace all that they can do for you. You are way too young to having sex, much less having a baby. Your body is not physically ready to actually carry a child. You can cause yourself permanent damage. I notice there is no mention of birth control here. Has he already had sex with someone else? What if he gives you an STD? Please talk to your parents and let them know that your boyfriend is pressuring you to have sex. They can help you make the right decisions for this point in your life. If you have a baby now, it will be harder to finish school. It will be harder to go to college. It will be harder to get a good job. It will be harder to provide for your child. There is absolutely no guarantee of any support from your boyfriend, no matter what he promises. It's ok to be a virgin at 14 - in fact, it's a very good thing.

Elizabeth - posted on 06/29/2012

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First off you are too young. You can't even get a job. Being ready means that your ready to support your baby too. Who is going to support the baby? Isaiah? Does he have a job? Is he supporting you now? If not, what makes you think he is going to support a child. It is not fair to your parents to expect them to support your child. If you want to make adult decisions then it's time to be an adult. First you need to start helping pay the bills in the house your in. Once you can do that then maybe your ready. And if Isaiah doesn't agree then maybe he is just saying what he is saying to get in your pants. Alot of guys will tell you what ever you want to hear to have sex. Don't fall for it. Make him wait. And if you a old enough to be a mom you are old enough to tell your parents about this conversation.

Tanda - posted on 06/29/2012

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I assume this means you are working at a job, have your own home, can afford diapers, formula, doctor visits, baby clothes, daycare while you finish school.... REALLY grow up you spoiled brat- what you really are saying is you want to do whatever you want and then your parents will have to support your child because you are a selfish 14 year old who feels entitled to do whatever the heck you want without really thinking about the consequences!

Jaharah - posted on 06/29/2012

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I am 25 years old and have a 2 year old son. I love him to death but I am still in college and working. I have a decent job but could've had a great job had I wait until after college to have a child. These days a great job requires a degree a half decent job requires at least a high school diploma. To raise a child from age 0-17 cost about $237,000. I suggest u at least enjoy ur teenage years graduate high school, see if your still with the same boy and then revisit the idea of having a baby. My best years were my teenage ones and I won't trade them for the world I wish I could go back sometimes. lol

Jenn - posted on 06/29/2012

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PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE WAIT TO BECOME A PARENT!!! I was a teen mom & struggled to provide my daughter with the life she deserved. I got pregnant @ 16 & had her a few months after turning 17. It was tough just to finish high school (I graduated on her 1st bday) and I had a ton of help.
Her father who was supposed to be around to support us was a joke (my daughter just turned 18, he has only spent at the most a total of 12 months in contact with her & never paid a cent of child support). I was lucky enough to have family & the government for assistance, which I relied heavily on to get me through college so I could get a decent job & support us on my own. I wish all the time that I would've waited to become a mom so I could've done better for her.

It sounds like your boyfried is willing to say whatever it takes to get in your pants. Realistically, the chances he'll be around to help out with a child are slim to none. Adopt a pet from a local shelter together. They take alot of work, love & patience and if/when you break up, it will be a whole lot easier to continue caring for a pet than to care for a child!

Mizz - posted on 06/29/2012

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To "Kayla": I have never replied on the forums before, but some reason your post ticked me off. I'm not sure what it was that did it...but you did. (sarcasm) "Good Job!" (/end sarcasm)
However.... If this is a BS post just to get attention, congratulations, you got attention....and some really good advice that you should SERIOUSLY consider. These lovely ladies have given you some very good stories and suggestions from their own experiences; experiences you probably are not ready for based on your original post.

You said you were "scared". Be scared and consider the consequences. This isn't "MTV: Teen Mom". You won't get paid $300,000 to run around with a camera following you and your baby doing mundane everyday things. The shows probably were meant to show how hard it was to be a teen mom, and maybe they do (....never watched them.....).....but they have taken a life of their own and seem in poor taste now.

I don't think this post is real but if it is.....you should be asking yourself what you expected posting on a Moms forum. O_o

Robin - posted on 06/29/2012

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I understand wanting a baby. But you have to understand that a baby becomes a toddler and a preschooler and a teenager. Are you prepared to love a child in his\her terrible two's and three's. It not all cute and cuddly!
I have two college degrees and a career and am a single mom. Let me tell you that it is not easy for me and I am an adult. I cannot imagine the life you would create for yourself and your child if you were to become a mom at 14.
Be kind to yourself and your future child. Wait until you can provide more opportunities for yourself and your child.

Deborah - posted on 06/29/2012

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Why do you want to be a teen mom? You did not provide the reason in your post. Having a baby at 14 will present an enormous challenge for all those involved. How will you support the baby financially? Who's going to keep the baby while you are in school? What type of fun things do you enjoy doing with other friends? Don't be robbed of your childhood. Don't rob your child of a wonderful life. You will make it very hard for this child having the baby so young. Trust me, you will regret this decision. You and your boyfriend are too young to make a life altering decision like this, If he really loves you, he will wait until you have finished high school and have reached some of your life goals. By the way, what your goals? What do you want to be when you grow up??? Please discuss this and birth control with your parents prior to having sex. Once your virginity is given away, you can never get it back....

Haydee - posted on 06/29/2012

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Please please wait. People dont realize what immence responsibility it is to have a baby. I cant imagine having a child at your age and on top of that having to finish school and work. I 28know when I had my first child. I will never forget how I had to what up every two hours 24/7 for three months! I then had to back to work fulltime and ar night I still had to get up and nurse my baby for another few months. Just to get a taste of this, set three alarm clocks two hrs apart starting at 11:00pm and do this for a week. This will give you just a tiny taste of how a baby keeps you awake. Also your boyfriend needs to do the same! He just wanta sex and is not thinking of the consequences. You are at an age where your hormones are raging and thats nornal. But your nrain needs to be smarter. If anything you want to be the best parent and provider you can be to your baby. You cant so that without a good education. Please take care of your future first before you even think about bring in a baby to a world with so many problems.

Barb - posted on 06/29/2012

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Don't do it. I know that in this day and age, EVERYONE seems to be having sex before they are married. Think of the baby. Does he/she deserve to be brought up on welfare? Does he/she not deserve to have 2 parents that love and care for them and will be there for them no matter what? Wait. Wait for your HUSBAND, who will love you even more if you save yourself for him. Respect yourself. God knows you want to be a mom and He has a plan for you, just don't take it into your own hands and make mistakes you will regret for the rest of your life. Give your parents a chance to talk to you. Expect them to be hurt, or disappointed but know it is only because they love you and want the best for you. Having sex at 14 and planning on getting pregnant at 14 is not what is best for you. Enjoy your life, be a kid, get caught up in the magic of this time of your life, because it passes quickly. Stay in school, get your diploma, go to college, have fun! Just don't do this.

Kathy - posted on 06/29/2012

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Sounds like you need to spend a little more time focused on school before you even think about becoming a mother. No child wants an illiterate parent!!
Seriously, what is the hurry? Slow down and find something else to put your energy and time into.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/29/2012

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No more being a kid or a teenager yourself. You will miss all of your big mile stones, being 16 and having it be special, 18 and becoming an adult (since you will have to be an adult the minute you get pregnant) no fun at 21 when you are legally allowed to drink, I mean your life will come to a screeching halt because this new life needs and demands all of your time an attention.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/29/2012

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No parties, no prom, no going out with your friends, no meeting boys, no sports or other activites, no shopping except for baby stuff, no life.

Ashleigh - posted on 06/29/2012

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you know the right decision to make, you can feel it deep in your gut!!! Your sixth sence has kicked in, or you wouldn't be asking us for advice... all of us are going to say the same thing, that your making a huge mistake!!! Life is not that easy and desirable... in fact, its down right hard and at times unbearable, and you dont want your baby to have to struggle through life. You should talk with your mom, tell her the truth about how you feel, and get birth control. If your as smart as you sound, you wont do this to anyone, or most of all, YOURSELF!!! Good things come to people who wait, and Great things happen to people who deserve it... :) You know what to do!!!

Frances - posted on 06/29/2012

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I am going to try to be helpful to you figuring you won't listen to all these grown-ups telling you not to. If you are going to have a baby it is much better to breastfeed. It is cheaper, you don't have to sterilize bottles, no equipment needed, it is always ready to go, not to mention the health benefits to the baby they get sick less often. The first 2 weeks are the hardest but if you can bet past that it becomes easy. Right now while you are still thinking about getting pregnant look up your local La Leche League and go to a meeting. The mommies there will be much more helpful to you in person than all these posts on the net.

Just imagine you have a daughter what are you going to tell her when she is 14 and wants a baby. What are you going to tell your teenage daughter or son when they won't listen to you and ask why they should listen to you when they are older than you were when you had them?

Lynn - posted on 06/29/2012

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you need to wait i was a teen mom i had my first at 14 years old not by chose and it has been hard at this age you may have more competition the baby can be premature at birth and your body my not look the same i have s mark all on my belly and if you go to school it will get hard and your boyfriend is saying this to take you virgin away and if you get pregnant he may not stick around for long i was a single mother for 3 years it is hard.

Laura - posted on 06/29/2012

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I think you should wait darling! We all think kids are fun and cute, and they are but there is much more to it. You will be giving up YOUR life, no high school prom or school semi formals, and you can forget about going out with friends. Not to mention trying to finish school will be next to impossible!!

And to touch on your boyfriend saying he doesn't care he will be there, he says that now by saying something and doing it are totally different he is basically telling you what he knows you want to hear. I know your not going to like the sound of this but here it is, if you don't have sex with him he will find someone else who will. And if baby does come he won't be getting sex and he will be dealing with baby and let me jut say this BABY changes everything. A lot of relationships don't work out because parents do not agree with the other parent about things happening with their kids. So if that's the case what makes you think you guys can make it work, especially when you are 14!!

So here's my advice darling wait until your done high school and then revisit the idea of kids, things Change quickly an you may be very happy that you wait and did not have to miss out on any of the stuff that a young girl should get to enjoy!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/29/2012

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Kayla, you are scared because you are not ready for a kid. It is a ton of work. I hope you are not trolling, and you are taking everything we say seriously.

Tina - posted on 06/29/2012

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can i ask one thing. How much do you do around home. Do you do the cooking, cleaning, pay the bills do food shopping have any kind of job. My cousin is a teenage mum even though she's a parent she absolutely refuses to do this stuff. Don't get me wrong she loves her baby but love isn't enough. She decided to basically run away from home 16 because she didn't like living by rules. She went from house to house because she wouldn't live by rules. She ended back at her mothers house until recently. Still doesn't pick up after herself. Doesn't have her licence but has a car that doesn't run because it's all she could afford. It's now filled with her stuff that she wasn't able to basically take with her in a pram. And sitting at the front of her mothers house where it was pushed. She recently got asked to leave because she refused to anything. Now she's house jumping as far as i know. complaining because she can't get a house to live in. She has to walk everywhere or catch a bus and in our town it's about $15 a trip cheaper in the city. She's had to start a new facebook profile because pretty well all her so called friends harrass her now. She partner is a deadbeat who by the way made the same type of promises. Everyone tried to tell her how hard it is and she wouldn't listen. His family and friends decided when she fell pregnant that they were going to kill the baby went around luckily she and her younger brother were inside hiding but my aunty was outside and got beaten within inches of her life. Her scull was broken along with ribs punctured lung she had a pool cue jabbed in her butt. This might not sound related to you but the fact is the decisions you make wont only affect you. Actions have consequences and if you're sure you want a baby remember what people have told you. This is serious. If you want a baby so much go take care of someone elses not just baby sitting stay with them. Get up when they get up to feed try to tackle to tantrums and sleepless nights. That's only a small part of parenting.

Missy - posted on 06/29/2012

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Have you seen the shows "16 and pregnant" or "teen mom"? The moms and dads usually don't stay together and the dads usually are not involved at all or very little. And a lot of times their involvement make things worse! Don't do it! Don't become a teen mom. And the best way to avoid this is abstinence.

Sharlene - posted on 06/29/2012

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Im not buying her ATTENTION SEEKING ,ladies check her profile and communities. A 14 yr old would not have that much excess to a computer and be part of all those communites without her parents knowing. come on

Ofonime - posted on 06/29/2012

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Men!! Do you guys have it good over there. I am a 35 yr old Nigerian educated ( masters degree (that's in west Africa). I mean I read all kinds of things on this websites. Words like government assisted dont exist . My dear girl, you are way too young to be thinking about sex let alone considering being a mom. I have to kids of my own and sometimes I feel like what is this!!! It's such a beautiful thing being a mom but also extremely demanding and lonely at times. So please get a good education and have fun as a young lady first. Hope you make a wise choice.

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