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38 weeks pregnant and DH wants to go out..

Jayna - posted on 05/06/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

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So last night my DH ask if he could go out this Saturday to a B-ball game cause his friend would have an extra ticket. I am 39 weeks pregnant with our third child mind you I have been at home for the last two weeks due to maternity leave 24/7 with our 4 yr old and 1yr old and I am nesting so have been slaving around the house cleaning. My question is am I wrong for being upset that on the day I actually get a break from watching the kids and am due very soon Should he be going out and leaving me. Oh its also mother's day this weekend and his phone gets no reception in the arena so there wont be a way to contact him for at least 3 hours. On top of all this he has been going out on occassions when we have the money and once in a while I have gone with him. Well when I told him this weekend was not a good idea and why he started yelling and saying that anytime he is able to get out he has to"drag me around with him" I at that point started crying my feelings where so hurt. The last time we did go out was suppose to be a date to a concert I ended up being the third wheel while he put all his attention on his friend and proceeded to get drunk and then annoy me for the remainder of the evening at 8 months pregnant. Are my hormones just getting the best of me or is he just wrong and if so why is he being this way? I feel sometimes its more important for him to spend time with his friends and does not mind putting me down and making me feel like crap to do it.

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Miriam - posted on 05/06/2011

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WOW!! I had twins 4 months ago and I think I would of flipped if he would of even thought about going anywhere by the end. anything can happen he should be there with you helping you spoiling you and making sure your okay. Yes hormones are crazy, but no you are right I dont care if he loves baseball he wanted a baby now he needs to be there for you and your kids!!! what if you go into labor and you cant call him because of no reception? I would be mad that he even brought it up!! I would tell him yes go, and if you dont find us when you get home its because I went into labor!!! plus when you go out with him he should not drag any friends along his attention and focus should be on you and your son if he comes along!! Im sorry and good luck!!

Amber - posted on 05/06/2011

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I think this is a multi-level answer for me.
Is it a big deal that he go to a ball game? No. It would only be a few hours and you could still spend the whole day/night (whichever) having time off. A few hours won't kill the whole day.

It is good for spouses to have alone time without each other. If he's already been taking this time, then I don't think that he should be complaining much about you asking him not to one time.

To me, it sounds like you are kind of feeling left out/neglected by him. So, maybe you need to sit down and talk to him about that. Maybe set it up so that he was Xnumber of nights out with his friends, but has Ynumber of nights with only you (in or out, whichever you want) per week/month..whichever.

I have a feeling that you might feel better about his going out for a few hours with friends if he put a little more effort into his time with you.

Should he be yelling at you for wanting him to stay home? No. There is no reason for him to react that way to you; it is disrespectful.

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