4yr old in pullups and 9 month old wont sleep!

EBONEE - posted on 10/16/2011

@ Sheri, i felt i adressed you as i saw fit as i did see my name after the "@" .. and i have done what was best and have had no problems thank you and will continue to do so. and only gave you my Opinion as you did Adress it twards me after the "@".... as you was specifically speaking with me as you have done so in the last message as you posted SPECIFICALLY .. as i am now SPECIFICALLY speaking to you @ Sheri

Sherri - posted on 10/16/2011

@Ebonee my original post was never directed at you. It was meant for the original poster so please stop thinking I am talking to you in anyway unless you specifically see your name at the beginning of my post.

Have your opinion do as you wish. Glad it worked for you but really was never even speaking to you.

EBONEE - posted on 10/16/2011

@ Sherri, i understand your argument and you have the right to do as you see fit and children do need their sleep but how detremental is 5 minutes or less to wake up and use the bathroom ? and your pediatrician does not know everything in the world and can only give you an opinion based on a scientific study that they have read about and it probably worked for those children considering the controlled setting but really are all people the same i think NOT. and not all peoples methods the same No , i feel that we should use whats right for them because not every method works for every child as we are not all the same. but i found that using my method with my son has had no problems at all and was fully potty trained and not wetting the bed since he was 3 and is now going on 5, altho he does has a once and a blue moon accident and its okay if he does im not looking for perfection because it happens. and doing this has not caused any damage to his sleep patterns and he always gets his full sleep. i now dont have to wake him up anymore because he's able to go on his own when he feels he needs to go

Deanna - posted on 10/16/2011

As far as your daughter goes....we potty trained our boys during the day in regular underwear, with the thinking that feeling wet makes them realize they needed the bathroom. My son was in pull-ups til 4 at night but one thing we did was to make sure he didnt' have anything to drink for an hour before bed. Make sure they go to the bathroom before bed then as someone else suggested, wake her up before you go to bed to use the bathroom again that way you can be sure her bladder is empty.

As far as your son goes...I would just watch the schedule closely. Is he taking two naps during the day still, maybe it's time for just one. If he's awake at night, does he sleep in? Wake him up in the morning, limit naps and keep to the routine. And unless he's really screaming...leave him alone in his crib and he'll fall back to sleep, nothing fun about a dark room.

Genevieve - posted on 10/16/2011

I wouldn't worry about 4 yr old either, although here is what I did with my 3 and 1/2yr son. I just told him, from now on you are not wearing a diaper ( I think pullups are too expensive personnally!) and so you need to wake up to go pee. We try to not drink at least one hour before bed, make sure we pee before we go to bed, even when he says he doesn't have to go there is always a few drops. And most of the time he will wake up once and I make him go pee and we are fine. Otherwise it's usually in the wee morning that he pees in bed WHEN it happens. I would say he usually pees in bed about once a week. SO I personally don't care and it is way cheaper then a pullup every night. But it depends if there is still pee in her pullup EVERY night then yes I would say just wait until you see no pee. Also try to make it a big deal if she wakes up dry it makes them feel very grown up! :) good luck, oh and for your son I agree with the others, if he is not demanding you , just ignore him it's in a way a good thing if he doesn't already he will learn to fall asleep on his own and that is an important milestone!

Karen - posted on 10/16/2011

Pull ups are one of the worst product ever! It is FAKE training! I'm a big kid now? with pee pee in my pants? Really?
You must go cold turkey and get ready to change some sheets for about a month - while the 9 mos old is up - take the 4 year old to the toilet and put her back to bed too!

Sherri - posted on 10/16/2011

@Ebonee quite obviously my pediatrican's office as it doesn't teach them anything and only lends to breaking there sleep which is much more detrimental for kids.

Carol - posted on 10/16/2011

@ Ebonee, I know it wasn't my statement but I had a pediatrician tell me not to wake sleeping toddlers to try to potty train them. He said to : establish a routine of limiting large quantities of liquid an hour before bed and to take them to pee as the last thing before lights out. In time their bladder will grow strong enough to make it through the night or the sensation will start to wake them up. He equated waking kids in the night to pee as similar to nurses who wake you in the hospital to give you a sleeping pill ( unnecessary). I undertand his logic and of 12 children I've had all of them arriving at various stages of potty training, none were in pullups by the time they were in grade one. I trust my doctor. and we all get a good night's sleep. LOL

Kandy - posted on 10/16/2011

Its perfectly normal for your 4 yr old to still be wearing pull ups at night. My grandson turned 4 in august and has only stopped wearing pull ups within the last 2 months.Somethings to remember... All children get completely potty trained at different ages some pick it up faster than others so theres no magical age when accidents stop. Just remain patient and dont scold, yell or humiliate your child. Do give her encouragement and praises for good (dry) nights. I limited my grandsons liquid intake before bedtime. If he was thirsty he would get 1 sip, but he usually tired to take a big gulp lol. Have her try to use the potty right before bed even if she insists she doesnt have to go. And last talk to her ask her if she feels shes ready to try sleeping without a pull up on. I always gave my grandson the option to sleeping without one. When he was ready he said so. I also found keeping him on a sleep schedule helped so much, Its when he gets over tired and wore out is when he has accidents.
As for your 9 month old, are you putting him to bed too early? Does he have extra energy that he needs to burn off before bedtime? I would try keeping him awake an hour longer than usual or limit his late afternoon early/evening naps. Another idea to try is get a baby monitor with a camera and when he wakes just watch him to makes sure hes safe without going into his room. Once he sees you hes going to want to play. But if hes upset or crying go to him and give him comfort once hes settled down and has made it known that he just wants to play return him to his bed and continue monitoring him. Good luck and heres the best advice that i give to my children all the time is... I know that at the moment it can feel very stressful and overwhelming but try to find the joy and happiness in every situation because before you know it your child will be walking, talking, and independent and then is when your going to miss them needing you like they did when they were little

Naomi - posted on 10/16/2011

there's nothing wrong with a four year old in pullups at all. my girl has just turned five, and she has only been out of a pullup for a few months. i didnt think hse was ever going to get out of one, but we started a star chart, with a reward on the 7th dry night. just somethin little, from the $2 shop. she goes to bed at 7pm, and we got her up at about 9:30 to take her to the toilet,and in the beginning, we also took her again in the middle of the night-the second time didnt last for long! i was worried about her waking to much during this,but she was completely fine and i even think she was asleep for some of the trips. now, we only take her at 9:30, and she gets right thruough till the morning. good luck

Leah - posted on 10/16/2011

My daughter was wetting the bed and I took her to a chiroprator. They aligned her L2 vertebrate (i believe it was the L2) which was apparently pressing on her bladder. Worked for us. The first day she went to the bathroom about 6 times and then it worked. Good Luck.

EBONEE - posted on 10/16/2011

what. really what pediatrician said this -- ive never heard of such a thing . my mother did it with me when i was a child and so did her mother. and its not a continuous thing its only untill the child can wake up on there own and use the bathroom when they feel they need to go and you said recomended but has it been proven ... i find that i turned out fine and so has my son but to eaches own.

Sherri - posted on 10/16/2011

DO NOT wake them up in the middle of the night to go the bathroom. Actually pediatricians strongly recommend against this as it breaks there sleep is extremely bad for them.

EBONEE - posted on 10/16/2011

we'll its not unusual for your daughter but my sudgestion is to not give her anyliquids after 7 if shes in bed by 8 and make sure she uses the bathroom before bed time and i would even wake her up out of her sleep in the middle of night to use the bathroom , she will be cranky but after a week or two you will notice that she wont be wetting the bed at all , it worked for my 4 yr. old son.
and for your 7 month old is he taking alot of naps during the day? if he is then you should stop so many naps and keep him up during the day even if he starts to fall asleep. ull find that he'll sleep through the night a little better, that and a nice warm bottle with some cerial in it and a night time warm bath should do the trick. hope this helps

Carol - posted on 10/16/2011

Don't stress yourself over it. It will come in time. Sometimes they at that age they may sleep right through it as their bodies aren't fully developed to the sensation of having to "go" Put her in pull ups, don't make a big deal if they are wet and it will come in time. Make sure she goes pee as the very last thing before bed and very first thing in the morning. My youngest foster son wore pullups at night til he was nearly 5. If you are concerned about a medical issue, talk to your family doctor. Its not uncommon and I'd rather change a pullup in the morning than have an embarassed child and lots of laundry everyday.

Good luck, it will come.

Stephanie - posted on 10/16/2011

Hello Dear..I have a 12 yrs old son and many nieces and nephews so I definitely understand your frustrations. Well the potty thing I had to wake up every few hours and leave a nite light trail from my sons room to the bathroom so he wouldn't be scared to get up when he has to go. Really explaning the feeling you get and how to wake urself n the night helped him too. These children are way smarter than we think. I didn spank him when it got excessive. No drinkn after 8pm helped but its a combination of ideas no 1 thing works @ this point and u may tire urself with the midnite potty training but after a month she should feel comfortable enough to wake n the nite. And your son..I went thru thtat exact thing..mr playful and he's still mr playful till 2day. Wat I did was give him a nice warm bath b4 bed and give him a baby massage fi abt 5-10 mins..dats long for a baby..then I'd nurse him last...by that time he's so hungry he falls a sleep b4 he gets full so I kno the first time he wakes he's definitely hungry..and if he wakes up a 2nd time n wants to play I ignore him as long as he's safe n nothings wrong its perfectly ok to let play n the crib. If he issist on coming out

Kimberly - posted on 10/16/2011

Hi, I just wanted to let you know that my daughter was in pull ups (night only) until the age of 6. I was very frustrated and tried everything but my pediatrician reassured me that they don't consider bed wetting at night a problem until after the age of 6. She said that some children sleep very deeply especially if they don't nap. Or, their bladders aren't fully developed. My son was trained through the night by 3. You can try things like no fluids for 2 hrs. before bedtime, and waking them up to potty before you go to bed. It worked for a friend of mine but we just had to wait it out. Good luck!

Kristi - posted on 10/16/2011

Ring tresillian, they are awesome with sleep issues, you can get phone counselling for settling and sleeping, tips and tricks. Remember, you getting some sleep is important too, which some people seem to forget. Also it is not good for kids to have interrupted sleep in the long term. I remember at first being really distressed by it all, but really they can be sleep trained really quickly. Good luck, my advice is always to call in the professionals

Courtney - posted on 10/15/2011

Agreed Teresa. I guess this full time stay at home mom messed up too.

Teresa - posted on 10/15/2011

Did you not read where my girls were out of night time pull ups at 4.5 and had wet beds for FOUR YEARS! Yep, guess this full time stay at home mom who spent every moment raising and teaching her kids was just too lazy to wake them repeatedly throughout the night and 'guess' which of the random nights they would need to pee and couldn't wake themselves....

Lazy my butt... hahahahahaha.....

Ann - posted on 10/15/2011

The problem is not with the kids, it's with parents being away all day at work and not having time to potty train because of busy schedules. Take a week off of work and spend it potty training your child. it works trust me! and not to mean that you are but most parents now days are too lazy and just make excuses for this behavior. Im sorry but it is not acceptable for a child over 3 to be in diapers or pullups day or night. Think about your kids before money and take the time to train them as soon as they can walk they should be sitting on a potty to get the idea, even if they don't go, they will. my son was potty trained at 18 months old and have never had an accident. You can use cheerio's to help. put a few in there potty and tell them to go pee. they think it is a good game and will be encouraged to stay dry and use rewards like stickers for going each and every time! Good Luck.
as far as the baby ignore him for 5 mins before going into his room. if still crying talk to him, give him a bottle ect but do not pick him up.

Cherie - posted on 10/15/2011

I have a little girl that is 5, 6 in Dec and she still has a pull up at night. We do let her try to sleep without one but I am up in the night changing sheets etc. She will let us know when she is ready.... as long as they make them in her size I figure we are ok :)

Teresa - posted on 10/15/2011

So awesome that so many kids quit wetting the bed when the pull ups were removed. Much better than you all having to deal w/ wet beds for 4 YEARS.

Of course, I do have a kid that would puke in her sleep when sick and instead of waking up and telling me about it.... she's just stay asleep on the other side of her bed and not even know she puked til the morning.....

Ciara - posted on 10/15/2011

hey there on de pulls up my lb was de same at 4 i kept waitin 4 de morning wen hed wake up dry but it didnt happen and wen i just took he out of dem i realised dat he was just goin in de pull up cos he had it on... i just told him wen h awake to make sure he gets up to go toilet n i take him out to go just b4 i go bed and apart from i tink 2 accidents its gone really well...out of dem nw bout 2 nhalf mnths hope dis helped....as 4 de baby is he sleepin in the afternoons i had to cut out my youngests afternoon sleeps last hr or 2 b4 bed can be very trying at de min but he seems to sleepin btr at nite so far...fingers crossed it stays dat way

Nicole - posted on 10/15/2011

if she is in underwear all day, why put her in pull-ups at all at night? try time without and see if she still has dirty pants at night...I bet she won't. sometimes kids think very simple things...like "you're supposed to poop in diapers"...you never know what's going on in their heads...but it's rarely what we think it is.

Biggie - posted on 10/15/2011

Your 4 yeard old is an easy one. Take away all pull-ups and place a plastic cover up on her bed and let her feel what it is like to wet the bed. Try this for a month. It is not her directly, it is her body's way of thinking. She knows she is in a pull-up so it is easy for her sub-conscious not to bother holding her bladder or waking up to go pee. Your son's situation is normal, try a few things at night. Warm milk, soothing music, lotion rub down and/or massage. Over time he will start sleeping through the night again.

Betsy - posted on 10/15/2011

With your 4 year old, make sure she is going to the bathroom sufficiently during the day. If she is not, then try making sure she goes every 2 hours during the day and see if that helps at night. Our grand daughter reverted to having to wear pull ups after being fully potty trained at night. Her doctor said many children need "re-potty training" at that age.

Nicole - posted on 10/15/2011

You may have a bed wetter. Just be patient. It's not her fault. Talk to your pediatrician about your options...I was a bed wetter and had one (out of three). We tried everything, including pills (from the pediatrician at age 10). They have alarms, etc...all kinds of aids.

And I would leave the 9 month old in the crib. As long as everything is okay, nightime isn't playtime. Don't encourage it or give him toys. Keep the lights out and listen to the monitor...eventually he'll go back to sleep. maybe start eliminating a nap during the day might help...push the morning nap to noon or later and keep him up during the evening cranks with a longer bath time, some active play then...

Andrea - posted on 10/15/2011

Hi Samantha, i have 2 boys, 7.5 and 6, my 7 year old stopped only this year wearing dry nites at night, I took him to a Incontinence Clinic costing over $400 because he was starting to get stressed about wearing the dry nites and they put him on the alarm (which they will only do at the age of 7)....my 6 year old is still in dry nites hasn't had 2 weeks of being dry yet to me to try without them...I am a firm believer that it will happen when they are ready...I don't believe that let them wet and they will wake up, my son slept thru everything, his problem was he was such a deep sleeper that nothing would wake him, his brain needed to be retrained (hence the alarm)..He is dry now and has been for over 6 months because he was ready....Please don't stress, it will happen when she is ready....Best of Luck...

Corrina - posted on 10/15/2011

my daughter will still in pullups at night at 5 and close to 6 as is my friends daughter - i spoke to the health nurse at school who said there is nothing you can do to rush it - it'll happen when they are ready a bit like periods

Samantha - posted on 10/14/2011

I would simply recommend limiting her drink before bed. And if she is a deep sleeper like mine are then, (if you put her to bed a couple of hours before you go to bed) you might want to wake her up to go to the bathroom and just "try" to go. This might help her to train her bladder as well as train her body to wake out of deep sleep, or go between rem sleep. But as far as the pull ups go, nothing is worse to a young child than wetting the bed. So let her wear them till she has matured her bladder. Also this is a suggestion. Nursing homes use really big washable/reusalbe incontinent pads for their residents. When they start to turn or need to be sewn they throw them away. I would take them home and resew them and put them on my kids beds under the sheet on top of the matteress. (so the pad wouldn't end up on the floor). When she is ready to try to go without pull ups at night, you still are rest assured that the bed will be dry, just a change of sheets will be needed. The pad are wonderful for sick children too! I wrap their pillows in them under the pillowcase so if they "get sick" the pillow isn't shot....Check with your local nursing homes, they might be willing to give you some.

Chrissie - posted on 10/14/2011

My son was in a night nappy until he was 5 and a half...don't stress too much. As for your son....close the door and let him play...he will soon get bored and go off back to sleep!

Phyllis - posted on 10/14/2011

That's what my brother did when he was a baby. He would wake up and just play. So my mother just let him and he grew out of it.

Kelly - posted on 10/14/2011

One you can't control and the other you can. With the 7 mos old you need to poke your head in the door and use your words for night time like "it's night-night time" don't touch them or pick them up and leave. Simple as that. Learning to sleep is just as important as other milestones and necessary fr both of you to have uninterrupted nights of sleep. If the child cries you wait 10 mins and repeat the process. This is only so they are not scared when all of a sudden they cry and you don't show. Often takes 2-3 times of this for less than a week and you should be all done. Night time training is different. I had one who trained instantly the same as his dry days. Then I had two one was about 6 and the other still occasional wet nights til about 9. It is more of a sleep disorder. They go into such a deep sleep they are unable to wake themselves. At 4 she is still pretty young to say that is the issue. Things that helped as we did not seek professional help. My husband said he "was pretty old" before he had dry nights. We would cut back fluids after dinner. Get them up again when we went to bed at 10-11 and sometimes again at 2 pm. All the twin beds had mattress protectors. They just had to outgrow it. It got to 1-2 times a month in those later years and we didn't use pull ups anymore. Always seemed to coincide with special events. Lots of activity paired with extra fluids and he was over tired and plenty hydrated.

Penny - posted on 10/14/2011

a 4 year old in pullups at night is completely normal. Lots of kids are not night time trained at age 4. as for the 9 month old, make night time very businesslike no matter how cute they are. if there is no reason to take him out of his crib, don't. Just lay him back down, and leave the room.

Michelle - posted on 10/14/2011

My 6 yr old still wears good nights to bed. The dr's aren't worried about it because she has no accidents during the day. There are nights that she wants to wear panties to bed, and I let her. If she has an accident she gets up and changes her clothes then lays on a fold out couch she has in her room and goes back to sleep. I try not to make any big deal out of it, because I don't want her to feel like she's bad for peeing the bed. I just have 4 sets of sheets ready so I can change them into clean ones, while I wash the others.

Leanne - posted on 10/14/2011

my son was four and a half before we finally could stop pull-ups. don't stress it.

as far as your son...is he sleeping too much during the day maybe? if he's still taking two naps, it could be he's ready for just one per day?

Kelli - posted on 10/14/2011

iPad issues...as for the baby I would make sure to keep him up in the evenings and just get into a nighttime routine of bath time, story time, and lights out. He'll get the hang of it. And to clarify, my son was 7 before I broke down and tried the alarm, I started with training pants and sheet covers, setting my alarm to wake him up, cutting off liquids at dinner, etc. But NOTHING worked for us so I went with the alarm. It wasn't cruel and it didn't scare him. Try EVERY option before the alarm, all kids are different and some just take a little longer than others.

Susan - posted on 10/14/2011

My son was a bedwetter on up until he was 5 or 6. Later I read that bedwetting could be related to a milk allergy. Have you tired removing foods from her diet to see if she would not sleep so deeply. My son could not be woken up to pee. I wish I would have tired the food allergies issue. He had other allegies that I found out later about. Limiting the other childs sleep during the day, might help with the "night playfulness". ROUTINE!!!!

Kelli - posted on 10/14/2011

Try a pee-pee alarm...I had the same issue with my son and we used it 3 times and he was fully trained! I wish I had tried it sooner. For the baby

Try a pee pee alarm! My son had the same problem and we only had to use it three times before he started getting up on his own!

Stacy - posted on 10/14/2011

Don't worry to much about your 4 yr old still wearing pull ups at night. Both my sons were about 5 when they stopped. The Dr said that is sometimes because of them being hard sleepers and not able to hold it @ night. She will grow out of it.

Allison - posted on 10/14/2011

I'm with Kimberly on this! I never just "ignored" my babies when they woke up. If they are playing and not crying for you then that's one thing, but letting the baby cry when he is literally crying is cruel. Is the diaper wet? Maybe he doesn't like it. We co-slept with both of my boys for as long as they wanted to and No it was not a problem to transition them to their own beds. Since my oldest son was 3.5 he told us when it was time for him to go to bed.

Letting them come sleep with us when they woke was less stressful on everyone in the house. It may not work for all but, for us it was perfect. But as long as the baby is playing and not crying then there is no issue with letting them be up and entertaining themselves for a while in his crib.

As far as the four year old I agree with the others who said that each child comes around when they are ready. Each person's body and bladder is different and it just may take her a little longer than other kids her age. Pull-Ups are a great solution for a dry mattress and bedding!!

Crystal - posted on 10/14/2011

That is not true about putting your 4 year old in panties and letting her realize that wet panties are uncomfortable and she will learn to go to the bathroom. I have been putting panties on my daughter for 6 months during the day and there are times that I have to change her 10-12 times a day. I am back to pull-ups. I think they will go to the bathroom when they are ready.

Lorraine - posted on 10/14/2011

My daughter is only just out of sleep pants and she's 9.She sleeps so deeply that she just doesn't wake up to go to the toilet,There's NO shame in this as every childs bladder control matures at a different age.Thank goodness for sleep pants I say,if you pressure your child to be dry they'll end up wetting due to sress.Don't stop giving fluids after a certain time at night as the bladder will never be able to learn control,plus you're only asking for kidney problems in later life.

Suzanna - posted on 10/14/2011

Whatever you do, do not make your 4 year old ashamed of the bedwetting. Been there, done that, was a consistent bedwetter until adulthood. I had medications, severe fluid restrictions, humiliating medical procedures, and not one blasted thing worked. Now, unfortunately, my six-year old seems to have the same dilemma. Thankfully, her pediatrician takes the 'let's see if she outgrows it, and only treat aggressively if it becomes a real self-esteem issue' approach.

Janessa - posted on 10/14/2011

With the 4 year old, it really depends on the child a lot of the time. My almost 4 year old was completely different than my 5 1/2 year old. At 2 1/2 he was potty trained night and day which he did himself. She was not that way. You could try to just go without the pull-ups and allow her to get wet a couple of times, and see if that helps her to learn to wake up. I also make sure my 2 that are potty trained go to the bathroom right before, and then only a little bit of water before and then I put them to bed, they make it the whole night most of the time. They'll get up to go if they can't. With the 7 month old, leave him in the crib, even if he wakes up your daughter. A couple of nights like that and he'll stop waking up. Right now he's fully expecting you to get him out of bed. So if you get rid of that expectation he'll stop. Again these are things I have done, that worked, and they may or may not work for you.

Amanda - posted on 10/14/2011

My daughter will be 5 in November and she is still wearing pull ups to bed as well as having accidents during the day. I have taken her to the doctor and just like my older daughter, she has constipation issues. But if your daughter is staying dry through the day without any problems, I wouldn't worry about it. She's probably just a deep sleeper like my daughter. I also don't understand the whole waking them up to go to the bathroom numerous times a night. Maybe once if you can figure out when they are wetting but kids need their sleep! Why would you want to disturb their slumber? Pretty soon they'll probably not get good sleep anymore just like the rest of us! Let them sleep!! Every child is different. Who are we to say what's right and what's wrong?

Kris - posted on 10/14/2011

as for the daughter in pull-ups, mine was still in them at night until she was 5. Try restricting water close to bed time. And what finally worked for me was waking her up a couple of hours after she went to sleep (just before I went to bed) and taking her to the bathroom. Good luck!

Angela - posted on 10/14/2011

I wonder if you little one is going through a growth spurt. My son did the same at that age. I would go into his room lay him down and pat him on the back to help settle him back down. I didn't talk or turn on the lights, just a gentle nudge to get him to go back to sleep.

Dorrie - posted on 10/14/2011

My daughter wore pull ups when she was the same age as well. The trick that worked for me was putting on underwear underneath the pull up. Magically, somehow she stayed dry at night after that. I told her if she had an accident she could change her underwear by herself and her sheets would be dry still. I think she decided she didn't want to have to change wet underwear in the middle of the night! I also had her use the toilet right before she hopped into bed. Some people also limit fluids after 6pm but I didn't do that. Best of luck to you...those pull-ups are really expensive!