Any advice for a 41 year old stay at home mom w/ a 2 1/2 year old?

Danielle - posted on 11/17/2009 ( 41 moms have responded )

15

21

2

I stay at home w/ my daughter, and I think I'm suffering from depression. I am steadly gaining weight, but have absolutely no motivation whatsoever. I don't have the slightest good feeling about myself. Feel like an ugly fat cow ( I only weigh 138- 5'2"). My daughter is newly potty trained and dosen't potty in public restrooms yet, so getting out of the house is not an option. She is pretty much at the TOP of the "terrible 2 list". I'm starting to really scream at her when she is doing or did something wrong. I definately know thats not a good thing, but I'm going crazy being in the house w/ her every day. I want to get a membership to a healthclub that has childcare, but my husband says thats redicioulous since we have a shed/building in our backyard that we had specially built for a work out room--we have a bow flex and a treadmill and elec/AC in the building. He dosen't understand that I think I need this for my sanity!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

41 Comments

View replies by

JOCELYN - posted on 11/22/2009

1

14

0

Hi Danielle. Hang in tere. The good news that the terrible 2's stage does not last forever. Have some time to take a walk around the block with your daughter. Go to the the neighborhood park and bring snacks to have a little picnic at the park with your daughter. This will keep your daughter busy and get you both out of the house.

Potty trainig is very hard both for mom and the child. Just bring extra clothes, training diaper, and lots of patience. Sometimes getting out of the house helps and keeping your little one busy will help out. One day time for yourself for at least 2 or 3 hours 2x a week will help. You can ask your husband to take your daughter for a walk or go to the park for an hour or two once or twice a week. You can use this time to work out at your house for 30 minutes and use the rest of the time for whatever leisure you enjoy.

Hope these suggestions will help you. Please have some time aside for yourself. We all need some time alone sometimes. I know it is hard to do this, but try it one time. Take care .

Jocelyn

Kelly - posted on 11/22/2009

1

21

0

See if you have a moms walking group in your area!! Just a few times a week really will help you feel better about yourself and getting a lil adult conversation makes a huge difference.!

Jo - posted on 11/22/2009

1

25

0

why dont you take your daughter to the park and run around with her thats what i do and i have three kids and it's fun..i also do Zumba fitness at home with the kids its like dancing look it up the kids injoy it as well...take her to kids play groups i also go there or we just go out walking for about half hr each day..see if theses help at all..you could even buy the slips that go on the public tiolet seats if thats any help...let me now how u get on...i have heaps of idea's..

Kathleen - posted on 11/21/2009

3

18

0

I am in the same boat. My son will be three on Monday. He is physically and mentally differently abled, so there is quite a bit he can't do for himself yet. I can tell you that cabin fever sets in our home around October. It's a bit easier forme since he's still in diapers, but he does get extremely bored while at home. And, I too, suffer from lack of motivations and weight gain. So I have decided that every day, we will go someplace. We usually end up visiting other people who are aware of our circumstances. Lots of times, we stroll in the mall or even around the neighbor hood. That gets us out of the house and he gets to explore while strolling and I certainly get a workout pushing him! I agree with others that you need soem YOU time. Time to take a bath or shower without interruptions, time to read a book, even if it's just for 1/2 hour. Incorporateyour spouse and other older children (if you have them) to take care of your little one for awhile. After all, they are part of the family, too. Being a stay home mom is the most challenging, yet reqarding job there is. And it is 24/7. My husband has told me several times that he couldn't do what I do. So we take shifts. I have 7am to when he my spouse gets home from work. He has from that time until 2am. It's not exactly even time, but it does give me a little rest to do other things. Good luck!

Christine - posted on 11/21/2009

312

39

29

don't let yourself get too deep into depression to the point of a total breakdown----it is so hard to come back from that place----i know, because i have been there. in fact the last 2 years i have nearly been there again. i am happy to say that in the last month i have finally seen the psychiatrist again and gotten on meds that have lifted the depression. i am getting things done again and not crying every day.



as far as your daughter and the public bathroom thing----she's only 2 1/2---8 of my 9 children were over 3 before they were potty trained---it's not gaoing to hurt anyone if you stick her in a diaper when you go out shopping----especially if it helps you mentally---that is far more important than her using a public toilet right now.



since you have the home gym already, why not find a couple of other moms and plan a few days a week to work out together at your house. my neighbors do this---they have invited me, but it was too early for me. now that i am on meds, i love getting up early.



walk, walk, walk, walk---and ride your bike if you have one. borrow a bike trailer for your daughter if you don't have one---you'll both have fun.

Sherrie - posted on 11/21/2009

1

0

0

your not alone i went through the same feeling with my first daughter that was 7 years ago now and i went on to have another 3 children ! i felt the same as you do at the mo and i went to my dr and she had my health visitor contact me she came out once a week and did what the profesionals call listening visits and you know what they really helped to boost me i started to get more confidence and started to venture out more with my daughter.I still get like it every now and again now im married and it hepls a bit but at the time i was on my own but there are things out there that can help dont feel like your the only one your not x

Robin - posted on 11/21/2009

13

17

1

There is some really good advice here for you to consider. Definitely take her out for a walk daily. Make sure she uses the bathroom before you go out. Natural sunshine is good. Also walking in different environments is good. Also, when you go out with her, always go to the bathroom yourself and let her see its okay to use the bathroom. Your husband is probably concerned about finances, but there's loads of free stuff to do, check out your local library.

Diana - posted on 11/20/2009

1

8

0

Get yourself to a doctor immediately - if you are clinically depressed, you can't just "snap out of it" with exercise or change of venue. Your nerves are frayed by your 2-year old, very understandably. But if you are clinically depressed, you may need talk therapy and medication. This is a real disease; you are not wacko. I've been there and once I got medical help, I was back to my old self. Then I became motivated to do the things I needed or even wanted to do, and had more patience for my children. Remember that you need "you" time AND interaction with grown-ups, as well. Your husband doesn't understand the whole picture. Let him stay at home with a 2-year old all day every day and see if that alone doesn't send him over the edge. You are doing an important job, but take time for you, both medically and socially, and you'll be a better, more patient, happier mom !

Melissa - posted on 11/20/2009

2

6

0

besides your not big.. dont think of yourself like that.Im 181 and 5'3". I love myself. I have to deal with.And I lost 20lbs from Not Being stressed

Melissa - posted on 11/20/2009

2

6

0

Hi Danielle, my name is MelissaWade From Fort Hood,TX. I feel your pain. I too at times is a single parent since my husband is in the Army. I have five children in which three are ADHD, along with my depression... But my way out of that is my Marykay business. Making women feel good about themselves have actually helped me with organization with my kids. My website is www.marykay.com/mwade76544. Check it out sometime and experience the freedom of depression with me

Anne - posted on 11/20/2009

1

0

0

First of all, you are totally normal. Every work at home (yes you are a working Mom in the home -what you do is very hard) Mom I know feels or has felt this way at some time. When I had an 18 mo. old and a new born I thought I was going to lose my mind. The important thing for me was to get out for an hour or two every morning. It was hard to get out the door but just the act of going someplace in the morning even for a short time made it OK to be home in the afternoon.
I did a parenting class (or "mom and me" offered through the community Ed). It was sooo good to know other Moms wo were going through the same issues. Also MOPS (mothers of preschoolers if your local church has one) and the Gym. I worked in childcare at our local church 2 evenings a week and that paid for my gym membership. Even getting out to work childcare for a little extra money was better than being home by myself because I got interaction with other adults and my kids got to come along for free and play. Check and see if you can work childcare for a few hours a week. A couple of hours isn't that hard and your kids get social interaction.
There is nothing wrong with a 21/2 yr old not being totally potty trained!! Congrats on getting her as far as you have, To say I can't go anywhere until she's potty trained is really putting restrictions on yourself and ot good for either of you. I used the pull ups from 2 1/2 until my daughter was a little over 3. No kids like the public bathrooms at first, the flush sound is loud and scary but they get used to it. My daughter eventually got used to the public restrooms.

Stephanie - posted on 11/19/2009

2

0

0

If you really think you're suffering from depression you should really talk to your doctor. Find out if you have true signs and what you can do about it. I remember being home for one year and being really "shack wacky" and it is really aweful - i couldn't wait to go back to work. Maybe you could check and see if your community has any Family Resource Centres, or if there are any programs at a YMCA for childcare. If there is another Mom nearby, maybe you could get together and take turns minding each other's children so that you can get out by yourself sometimes.

Trisha - posted on 11/19/2009

9

23

0

Mrs. Danielle, Sweetie you are at your prime. And you weight is fined for your height. Just find a beautiful morning and take your baby to the park and walk or run around with her in the park. That is exercise also. And you might want to find a job like at the daycare so your child can go to work with you. And then you will be able to talk to mature people. Instead of screaming at your child. Trust me it works. Because,i did it. And i'm 41 yrs old also. So if i can do it, you can do it also. And stop thinking you are ugly. All you do is get up. Make yourself beautiful and go out. even if you are just taking a stroll around the neighborhood. with your child in the stroller. That's another exercise. So prove to your husband that you don't need that exercise machine. I have all of that stuff also. and i don't use it either. And you need to get out in public with your child so she can get use to that also. I wish you luck. And let me no how that work.

Angela - posted on 11/19/2009

24

10

0

Danielle, I would talk to your doctor and see if you are sufering from depression. You do have some of the symptoms. I also understand your need to get out of the house, but I wouldn't let your daughter's fear of using public restrooms stop you. Have her wear pull ups when you go out in public. This way if she decides to use a public potty, put the white paper seat covers on it to make it more appealing for her, but if she doesn't, no harm. She's not going to have an accident. Right?

Also realize if you are off kilter, so will your daughter. The terrible two's was a stressful time for me but I always had to find my center because I noticed when I was stressed or not feeling good, my daughter's behavior got worse. I'm a working single mom so I value the time I have with my daughter, but everyone needs a break and I will have my parents watch my daughter when I need mine. I would talk to your husband about watching your daughter while you work out in the work out room he built and if you are into other interests to let you pursue those at least once a month so you get a little "you" time. Let him know that taking care of yourself will help the whole family.

When my daughter is really pushing my buttons and I need some "me" time and she doesn't get it, I always ask her, "Do you want a happy momma or a sad/mad momma?" Her answer always is Happy Momma and then I let her know that I need a little time to myself so I can be a better momma for her.

Liz - posted on 11/19/2009

1

12

0

I go for a walk everyday as close to noon as possible to get the most sunshine, even in winter. The sunshine helps my mood and prevents me from getting depressed as I am prone to this. Take your daughter outside for a walk with you, I only spend about half an hour on a walk and try to play outside for another half an hour.

Terisia - posted on 11/19/2009

9

1

0

I understand completely... I have a gym membership but am always to busy to make time for myself. I have a 17 yr old, a 15 yr old, and a 2 yr old trying to go through potty training. So I understand about the depression thing I feel I am too depressed.

Erica - posted on 11/18/2009

103

30

1

I agree w/ what these women say. Also, I think you should explain to your husband that you need some time away from the house and away from your daughter sometimes. I'm a stay at home mom and my hubby knows I need to get away sometimes. I take that time when he gets home from work and I just go to the store or something.

Sharon - posted on 11/18/2009

1

6

0

i know how u feel i have a 4 year old and im with him24 /7 .i dont get a break at all

Cynthia - posted on 11/18/2009

1

0

0

hello, danielle,



ok you do have the excercise equipment to get rid of your negative thought of being over weight so dont make that a problem because it could be solved,,,one thing 138 is not bad at all just your basics workouts that are out there a day will help you ease your mind. another thing i feel what your saying about ""yeaa got equipment but doing alone is not as motivating. maybe you should get lke a couple of moms from your neighborhood you know who are also stay home moms and get together and have sessions, not just like xcercise but little talks ideas plan outings w ur children as a group and also it gives opportunity or also these young children to play and see others children instead of them also being in house going crazy,,,,,u can use playpens to keep the children of moms who are working out, or talking w toys or learning tools...another thing if you want to serve or moms take turns bringing healthy snaks and drinks too,,another thing not enough equipment. use extra ball...stretch cords.....stepper w videos and rotate....hope this helps....

Rosa - posted on 11/18/2009

3

5

0

Aloha.....If u can call me I would rather talk to u.....But until then if u love music put it on the oldies motivates me. I am 53 5'2"and been stay at home mom and I weigh 210 ....I have throid problems 138 I wish I can be at that weight or less....Praying can help u......Mathew 6 the whole chapter. Call me @ 808-627-8465. if u dont have long distance....leave your no I can call u .......

Jessica - posted on 11/18/2009

2

6

1

Hi Danielle,
I am a stay at home mother of 2 children, ages 4 and 2. I have also dealt with depression off and on over the years. Staying home with a yound child can be isolating and is even worse when you have a young child with challenging behavior. I was feeling very similar to you have been with the lack of motivation and very quick to anger. I felt terrible when I would yell at my children and that would make me feel even worse about myself. Especially when I realized my children were becoming very reactive too! I was tired of feeling tired, tired of feeling anger and depressed and wanted to set a better example for my children. I know I am a fun loving person but my children weren't seeing it. So I talked to my gyno. at the end of Sept. about how I was feeling and she suggested a low dose anti-depressent. I was apprehensive about taking something but I feel soooo much better. I feel like I am enjoying my children more and can handle day to day challenges without getting so angry and overwhelmed. I still get upset from time to time but it is no where to the extent I was and I feel like I have more energy. I don't think it is for everyone but it has helped me during this isolating period of my life. I also think getting out more would help you too! Bring a potty if you have to so your daughter can potty outside the house. It may be a little bit more of a challenge but if you can get out and interact with other adults and moms that will help too. You are not alone. Good luck and I hope you feel better soon.

Nicole - posted on 11/18/2009

5

10

0

I has a similar problem last year after moving to a new town and not knowing anyone! See if ur local library offers a story time- If ur lucky u will find other moms as well as get out of the house for a bit. MUSIC- get on the music and get moving - 2 year olds love to dance and be silly and I found I lost about 5 lbs of my prob weight just dancing with my son thruout the day- Once I saw the first 5 lbs drop I became more motivated and dropped the last 15 ( i too am 5'2 and every lb shows i know!!!) Last but not least - we had the WORST time with the potty training until we started the "POOPY BANK" which i think u could use the idea for going in public places (if ur not above bribing ur kids with change?) We had our son put some change in his special bank everytime as a reward and in 1 month we counted the $$ and went to the store so he could pick out his own special toy- 2 months later NOT one problem using the potty in public or at all! GOOD LUCK!!

Melissa - posted on 11/18/2009

49

42

2

First you're not fat and you're not a cow. I would suggest picking up a few activities during the week that will get you active and help you feel like you're doing something foryourself while trying to stay healthy. There could possibly be a stroller club in your area, where area moms get together and excersise with their strollers. It gets you out of the house, gets your daughter out of the house and gives you time with other stay at home moms who are going through alot of the same things you are. Play groups are another biiiiig thing. This will help to also keep you in touch with other moms and get you guys out of the house while supporting your daughters social development and skills. After my last child (#4) I weighed in at 210 lbs, and have since got down to 180 lbs and still dropping (I'm 5'3) by doing the stroller club, watching my diet, and also completing a DVD workout session everyday. You can get a work out CD at wal-mart for $10.00 and do it about twice a day if it helps too. But those are just things that I've done to preserve my sanity as a stay at home mom of 4 (one of whom is autistic). Good luck and hope this helps.

Joanne - posted on 11/17/2009

9

25

3

I had a very difficult time with my daughter when she was young (0 - 5). She spent a lot of time having no sleep and being inconsolable, later to develop tantrums and unreasonable behaviour. She seemed frustrated and naughty at the same time. I didn't know what to do. The GP was little help to me. I found the CAFHS (Children and Family Health Services) nurse to be fantastic though. She would come to my home and take my crying daughter for a walk around the house and say, "don't worry I will be back next week". She'd make me a cuppa and I'd sit and stare at it. I had no family close by as I lived in the country. My husband din't want to come home as work was easier for him. I was in my own depressed little world and and didn't realise until I was placed on an antidepressant. This gave me the ability to see things more clearly. I needed time to myself and began to go out in the evenings when my husband was home. Visiting people. This helped me a lot. I think I'd forgotten who I was. I can fully understand your struggle with being motivated. The really sad thing at the end of the day is that we have to eventually motivate ourselves. It's hard. Personally, I like the idea of a gym membership. You would have a chance to meet other people and your daughter will meet other kids. I too have a treadmill etc. Doesn't always help!

Autumn - posted on 11/17/2009

8

7

1

I think that you do need to get out of the house and have a break once in awhile. Make a little time for yourself. But also be careful with what you say and how you act with your daughter. If you feel like your depressed and about more then just your weight then you really need to talk to your husband. Men are more often than not oblivious to what goes on in our heads. Especially when they think that you have the sweet life. You get to stay home all day and play with the kids. If they only knew...I've been a stay at home mom for over seven years. It gets tough sometimes and your feelings really aren't out of the ordinary. Just take care of yourself and your daughter. :)

Kim - posted on 11/17/2009

3

21

0

I too agree with all the other moms advice as I also had been a stay at home for over 10 yrs. My kids are now 17 (with ADHD) & 13,. the 13 yr old has disabilities that stop me from being able to work any kind of regular full time job.. plus I am a single mom to boot, with no physical help from my ex. He pays his child support, his visits are few and FAAARRR between. PLease dont be one of those wifes who feel the need to "heed" because they stay home and their husbands make the money.. HE is NOT your boss.. he is your husband and should be you equal.. He is entitled to his opinion, yes. But as far as telling you you cant... uh, no. Just because you dont "go to work" doesnt mean you arent pitching in.. let him see how much a full time nanny and housekeeper would cost if you were working. Go ahead and sign up for the gym if thats what you really want.. but honestly you probably wont meet too many people there. Most people are there to work out.. headphones on and they tune out the world. Your best bet would be to go to your local parks and recreation department, I know here in Howell they have many moms goups to join.. I also work in the mall and see many many MANY groups of stroller bragades going up and down ..back and forth.. chit chatting and laughing all the way.Try bringing your daughter to the mall early in the morning with the stroller.. the bathrooms are at their cleanest. Put her in a pull up just in case, but tell her there is no choice... you are at the mall,, the bathrooms are clean.. so either go in the potty or sit in a dirty pull up all morning. You are the mom... BE the mom and BE in control.. If she uses the potty then reward her with a little mall treat or bring a little treat. Santa is already at the mall.. just walk around by santa and you'll be bound to meet some moms there.. as far as the weight issue goes... been there, done that.. and now doing it again :( about 5 yrs ago I got to the point where I was disgusted with myself and my whole life.. very depressed. I had just decided to kick my husband out for the LAST time and finally file for divorce.. which I did. Then one day as soon as my daughter got on the bus I just started walking.. as far as I could and as fast as I could.. didnt get very far the first few days but eventually I did.. and after a few months I dropped 50 lbs and was the happiest I had ever been. I met a new guy.. got my divorce! Well.. now I am still very happily with that new guy.. but unfortunaltely gained most of that weight back.. LOL... BUT what I was getting at was the fact of just walking..even if its by yourself makes a big difference. I'm sure your daughter would probably love to go for walks in the stroller. and if not, as soon as hubby gets home hand her over to him and say "Look honey DADDYS HOME and hes going to play a game with you YAAAYY!!!" and GO!!! go out for that walk... if its too dark.. go to the mall and walk. Trust me.. you NEED that for YOU.

Heather - posted on 11/17/2009

2

4

0

I agree with every post that was written about getting out and getting your daughter to use a public restroom. I also recognize that there are situations that may not be remedied through a daily walk or trip to the playground. If you are feeling sad, gaining weight, unmotivated and overwhelmed, you probably are depressed. Have you talked to your doctor yet? Not every person who is put on antidepressants is having thoughts of suicide. Often, a person is put on medication for a finite amount of time and then is weaned off when their levels of Seratonin have improved. Your doctor will also help you assess if you are having thoughts that are dangerous to you or your little one and can help determine if there is improvement in your situation over time.

Leslie - posted on 11/17/2009

4

21

0

Hi Danielle, boy do I get it. I am 38 and a stay at home Mom for 8.5 years now.
It can be brutal some days for sure. All these ladies are right, but it's hard to get motivated when you are already feeling depressed. I'm not saying everyone should run off to the doctor, for meds, at the first sight of depression, but it sounds like you have been feeling this way for quite a while? Perhaps that could be a solution if the depression lingers. Being a good parent starts with taking care of yourself too, so don't be so hard on yourself and do a little something everyday that makes you feel better.

Rosa - posted on 11/17/2009

3

5

0

Quoting Danielle:

Any advice for a 41 year old stay at home mom w/ a 2 1/2 year old?

I stay at home w/ my daughter, and I think I'm suffering from depression. I am steadly gaining weight, but have absolutely no motivation whatsoever. I don't have the slightest good feeling about myself. Feel like an ugly fat cow ( I only weigh 138- 5'2"). My daughter is newly potty trained and dosen't potty in public restrooms yet, so getting out of the house is not an option. She is pretty much at the TOP of the "terrible 2 list". I'm starting to really scream at her when she is doing or did something wrong. I definately know thats not a good thing, but I'm going crazy being in the house w/ her every day. I want to get a membership to a healthclub that has childcare, but my husband says thats redicioulous since we have a shed/building in our backyard that we had specially built for a work out room--we have a bow flex and a treadmill and elec/AC in the building. He dosen't understand that I think I need this for my sanity!


 

[deleted account]

I have to agree, Moms and Tots groups make a HUGE difference. I belonged to a neighborhood group that took turns meeting at each others homes. It was great.

The more local they are, the better, I think, as you will make friendships that can last for years. Check your local paper, a church may have a group, some park districts have them, etc...
Also, be sure to look for direct help on the depression. Hopefully your insurance will have some coverage for counseling, which can help a great deal. A good therapist will even have resources to point you towards.
You local hospital may have groups for moms, for example.

But most of all, don't beat yourself up for feeling bad. Moms often don't realize just how much they are doing, and fail to give themselves credit for handling what they do.
On top of all the fundamental responsibilities we've got, many have post partum, sleep deprivation, cabin fever, marital strain and social isolation on top of it. Know when and how to ask for help. Just like you have here.

When motivation is the problem, go for the 'low hanging fruit' the easiest things you can do that will make a difference. Building on incremental change, you will find yourself working your way up out of the blues.

Wishing you the best.

Remember 'That which does not kill you makes you stronger".
This is how Mom's become super-human ; )

[deleted account]

You need to get her used to using public bathrooms. Maybe go on a trip just for that purpose to visit a public bathroom.

You probably feel depressed because their is no you anymore. I was a stay at home mom for 10 years. The first 2 years I thought I was going to go crazy. I felt like the walls were closing in on me....and I felt old...and I was only 20.

I have to tell you this is the time to stand up for yourself and find something for you. I am not telling you to be selfish, but for your family and your marriage you have to find something for you only. You have to find an identity separate from being a mom and wife. Join a group, for mom's or for painting, or for photography. Just an hour a week could make a huge difference. Make your husband understand this is not just for you but for the whole family. You need to have some time to be you, and do things you like to do. Otherwise you will be depressed, and it will affect how you treat your daughter and how you treat him. It is important to try to hang on to a little of who you are and what is important to you. It makes it easier to give to you family, and be a caring wife and mother.

Denise - posted on 11/17/2009

11

26

2

Try the mom and me groups. these play groups are usually posted at the pediatricians office. Time in the park, or a membership at a 24 hour gym so you can go when daddy comes home, there are a few gyms that have a kidzone.

There is also portable potty as an option, they had them when my boys were younger. Inside cooped up isn't good for either of you

Karen - posted on 11/17/2009

2

0

0

hi, danielle, im sorry that your feeling so blue, i can completely understand the feeling of needing to get out of the house, even without being depressed and having young children. it is a hard time as a mother. you definitly need to have time outs for yourself if you feel enraged. it teaches your children that time outs are good for everyone when anger strikes. try and set up play dates with other mothers and look into nutrition and supplements to help your mental/emotional balance . get some sunshine if you can to boost your vitamin d levels. this can cause depression. look into getting natural feel good supplements for yourself(seritonan boosters). motherhood leaves us to forget about our well being. it is of utmost importance. so make a date with yourself every week, for about three to four hours if you can and do something just for yourself without your child. get away. feel freeeeeee. love and my best wishes, karen

Kat - posted on 11/17/2009

2

0

0

Contact MOM's club international and see if there's a local chapter in your area. I've been in your boat, it helps when you have more adult interaction. I wish you the best, it's temporary, I promise.

Penny - posted on 11/17/2009

1

15

0

I understand 100% the only things is my daughter is 12 right now and I was working but because of some personel problems I was let go at work and have been home since end of April.. You do need to get out even if it is with her or without her.. Try and go for a walk or let her play in the back yard I know sometimes it is hard to get going but try.. I don't know where you live but I'm around if you need to get out :)

Daniela - posted on 11/17/2009

1

7

0

Make sure your daughter uses the bathroom AT HOME before you go on your daily 40 Minute walk. Sure she doesn't have to go every 40 minutes. Start with walking first, then run/walk and soon enough you will be jogging for 40 minutes. Best of all you will see how great you feel after. Physically and mentally. You will be proud of yourself, that you go out there exercising every day. Just do it!! :-) Bring a book along for your little one, to look at or her favorite doll...Find another Mom that has a little one and make a plan with her! Just remember, it doesn't last forever. Next year she will be in preschool hang in there!

Kelly - posted on 11/17/2009

9

13

0

I think your husband should pitch in and give you some you time! He must get out frequently for you to be going this insane. If you could get a girlfriend to get out to your work out room put some music on and get all frustration out in there it think it would really help.I'm a mother of 3 plus 2 step kids so yes i know all about going nuta and feeling like a fat cow. mt youngest is 16 months and yes she has also i think hit the terrible 2's. plus im only5ft and around 147 pounds so the feeling is mutual!

Nancy - posted on 11/17/2009

1

9

0

You need to get out of the house for some time with other mothers - lunch, a movie, or whatever you enjoy doing. Maybe on a weekend, let your husband stay home with your daughter and you go spend some time alone. Join a group of other mothers that switch off taking care of each others children for a day. Once you are happier, you will gain the will power you need to lose weight and feel good about yourself.

Tammy - posted on 11/17/2009

1

20

0

Throw on a pair of training pants and get your daughter use to public bathrooms..It won't take long. Search for a gym and get out of the house...How are you to work out at home while watching your daughter, besides you need the social interaction and a little break from being a "mom". If you husband still doesn't understand, run away for a weekend and have him watch your daughter all by himself..hehe..Sorry couldn't resist. But he gets out of the house on a daily basis. I know lots of women who suffer from "cabin fever", especially during the winter months. Good luck!

Tiare - posted on 11/17/2009

43

18

2

you may not need the gym membership to get motivated.... there are other ways.... try taking your daughter for a walk outside... just getting outside helps you feel better... it can get aggravating if she cant keep up to the pace you want so let her walk until she gets tired and then have the stroller so that you can keep going when she gets tired! and getting out of the house is an option.... you have to be in control... there is no reason why she cant use a public restroom, just make sure its clean(er), im sure you wont be hanging out at the gas station lol (where restrooms are nasty), so just talk to her and explain that we have to go out and that if she has to use the restroom that there will be one available, but if she doesnt do it, then you will be stuck, it sounds like you def dont need that! take her to mcdonalds and let her play, or to a playground, or simply in the back yard.... you have to try and get her active in order to motivate yourself, i was stay at home for a while and every single day i went on at least 1 30 minute walk everyday, by no time i was walking 5-7 miles a day and my son loved to be out there with me! it really did help! aslo, if your worried about the screaming you should really watch super nanny, most of the stuff is things that we all know, but sometimes we just need to hear it again, that way we are conscious of it... and i think you need to get out by yourself sometimes, even if its just the grocery store, make your husband watch your daughter while you go.. but you cant rush through the store... take your time, walk slow, enjoy your drive, stop and get a coffee or something... but you need some time to just be alone..... good luck and stay positive, its not easy but we are all in the same boat!!! try being a single mom, its about the same frustration, only cant depend on ANYONE to help....

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms