Any new suggestions for potty training?

Aimee - posted on 01/03/2012 ( 13 moms have responded )

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My 3 year old son absolutly refuses to use the toilet!!! I've tried everything from wearing no pants to cherrios in the toilet (for aiming) to the reward system. Nothing is working!! He has no problem "helping" everyone else in the house by flushing for us, so he's not afraid of the toilet, he's just stubborn and won't use it himself. Please help with any advice you may have.

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Dolce - posted on 01/06/2012

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Does he see his Father go? I trained my daughter by taking her in with me to sit on the potty, pretend to wee & I'd let her wipe so she understood the process. Maybe being male having the male process visible to him will help????

Becky - posted on 01/06/2012

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I have a boy who is almost 3 (in March) and he does really good at home but won't go at daycare, no biggie to me. The way we got him to go at home was the naked approach and we "caught" him right before he went and with boys you KNOW right before the go. He actually was in the tub and we pulled him out which scared him. We put him back in the tub and a few minutes later we knew he had to go, so we caught his pee in the potty (insert) and made a HUGE deal. There was singing and high fives and good job and all that and then a few M&M's. After that first time we had to catch him one other time then after that he would just go and tell us "YAY pee pee" and then wanted M&M's. That was like 4 months ago now we are just working on the other end.

Bonnie - posted on 01/06/2012

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My oldest would pee in the toilet and poo on himself. It was soo frustrating (and nasty)! When it was getting closer and closer to his 4th birthday my patience with the poo finaly gave way and I started handing him the wipes and sending him to clean himself up in the bathroom. He did it maybe 1 or 2 more times and that was the end of that! Every kid is different though. I still have yet to see how my youngest will do.

Sally - posted on 01/06/2012

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It sounds like a power struggle. Little kids are all about control because they have so little of it. The two things they can control are food and pottying and the more it matters to you, the more he will defy you to assert his personhood.
The fastest (and most frustrating way for mom) way to potty train any child is to leave them alone. Keep him in diapers until he's ready so you have less mess and pretend you don't care when it happens. You have to mean it for the long haul though. If you tell him it's his choice then continue to bug him about it or start trying to "train" him again in a few days, you'll lose even worse because that adds lack of trust to the power struggle.
Good luck

Stacey - posted on 01/06/2012

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Use the 3 day potty training method. Works every time! www.3daypottytraining.com ...there is a downloadable book you buy. If you follow the book (short, easy read), it will work!!

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Aimee - posted on 01/11/2012

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Thank you all for the wonderful words of encouragement. I will do my best to stay patient and hopefully one day soon he will decide he wants to use the potty :)

Reba - posted on 01/06/2012

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I think that he is not ready yet. He may refuse to mantain control of situation. Try just asking him if he says no..then let some time go by, then ask again. Or say let me know when you need to potty. My 3 year old is very stubborn and wouldn't go, it was his way of control. when I stopped making a big deal, he started to go. He is 3 yrs and 4 mths and fully trained. So relax don't make it a big deal and he will go. Then after he does, make sure he knows how proud you are of him, even if he only goes now and then at first. When he has a miss, just tell him to try to make it next time. Just act like it is no big deal, this worked wonders for me.

Jeanna - posted on 01/06/2012

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I had good luck with rubber pants. I told him that he was too big for diapers and that he had to wear big boy underware but if he refused to use the potty, that was fine, but I couldn't have him soiling the furniture. So he had to wear the rubber pants over top of his underware. He didn't like them because he felt wet and the rubber pants make them hot, especially in summer. Hope this helps!

Liz - posted on 01/06/2012

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Then just wait hes not ready. Let him be in charge and tell you when he is reapdy. Trust me

Erin - posted on 01/05/2012

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If he appears to have no control of his bladder at 3, he needs to be seen my a doctor. Yes, some kids take longer than others. And some are genuinely resistant to the idea of the toilet. But if he is physically unable to stop himself from weeing when he gets the urge, you are not going to have any success getting him out of nappies.

Aimee - posted on 01/05/2012

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He doesn't hold it at all...he just goes in his pants as if he were wearing a diaper still. and he doesn't care if his pants are wet, he'll wear them all day like that. When I have him infront of the toilet he'll start throwing a fit and try to run away.

Erin - posted on 01/03/2012

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My daughter trained easily and quickly with the no pants method, so I don't have any experience with the struggle.

When you say he refuses, does he just stand there and wee? Or does he hold it until you give him a nappy? Is he able to hold his bladder? How long between wees?

Jewel - posted on 01/03/2012

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Does he have a fear of the toilet or is he just being willful? The best solution depends on knowing more about the child. Every one of my children potty trained their own way.

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