Any other SAHM feel bad for hubby?

Rheannon - posted on 05/18/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I have a daily battle with myself everyday: go back to work or stay at home?

I went back to work when Alyanna was 6 wks old. I worked at a daycare & she was able to go to work with me. My daughter has had some medical issues since she was born. Nothing too serious but very scary as a first time mom. From the time she was 7 wks old until she was 5 1/2 months she had an ear infection which resulted in tubes. Along with the ear infections she always had a cough & runny nose. When Alyanna was a little over 6 months, my husband and I decided that I would stay at home with her. He had an amazing job that allowed that at the time. Then he was laid off shortly after & ever since then we have been battling to pay bills. My daughter has still been sick alot & she is tiny & underweight for her age(now 14 months). We want another child & I want to be able to stay at home. However, I also want to be able to help my husband so not all the stress is on him. I just can't see putting my daughter in daycare again. I have seen how some kids are & I'm so scared that she will get hurt & begin getting sick 24/7 again & then I'll have to be home with her anyways so it's like whats the point?

Does anyone else feel this way? My hubby says its okay for me to stay home that he doesn't want her in daycare either, but I just can't help but feel bad.

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April - posted on 05/18/2010

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I think a lot of moms go through this! We adopted our daughter, and from the start of the process, we decided we didn't want our child in daycare 40+ hours a week, essentially raising her for us. I did go back to work 4 months after we brought her home because a great opportunity presented itself, but it's on-call and I am still home with her 95% of the time. If your hubby can provide for your family, I say stay at home! The money I make is for unexpected expenses or savings. Our daughter is almost 2 1/2 now, and I feel like time is going by so quickly! I want to be there for as much of it as possible.

Angie - posted on 05/18/2010

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I stayed home for 13 years and I don't regret it a bit. My kids were loved and taught at home by me. I kept a clean home and had a hot meal on the table when my husband got home from work. It's not all about money - it's about raising a healthy family.

Joyce - posted on 05/18/2010

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Dont feel bad about wanting to stay home with your baby.She will grow up too quickly so make the most of it.Your baby will be fine either way so do what you feel comfortable with

Kathy - posted on 05/18/2010

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Maybe you could start a daycare at your house. A little extra income for the house and you can still be at home. Or there is always part-time jobs at night. I wasn't comfortable with putting my daughter in day-care. After she turned one, I went to work part-time and night and also did night classes at college. The job I got when she was 2 is full-time with great pay and benefits. It is a stable job. It has carried our family through some rough times. Our son did in-home daycare. I loved that much more than a day-care center. The care was much more personal. I wish there was more people out there like his Theresa. She was a wonderful care-provider. Now my husband is laid-off and makes a wonderful wife! LOL

Tiffany - posted on 05/18/2010

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I understand where you are coming from. I didnt want to send my daughter to daycare when she was little but I had to because my husband couldnt support us on his own. I went to work and got a call that my daughter was being sent to the emergency room because she was swelling, I was scared to death. We found out that she was severly allergic to peanuts/tree nuts which can be deadly. I totally freaked out and pulled her out of daycare and she is home with me and her little brother. With her condition I just dont trust anyone, maybe im paranoid but thats why we are mothers!! I ended up finding a great group of moms to where I can work from home and its great. There is more information on my mommy blog if you want to check it out. http://stayhomemomof3.blogspot.com/
I will send you an email here in a minute! Hope something works out because being a stay at home mom is so worth it. They grow up way too fast!

Have a great day
Tiffany

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