anyone have any advice on toilet training little boy?? really struggling

Tiffany - posted on 01/27/2009

Dont sweat it, the more you stress about it, the more he'll resist...Everyone potty trains evenually so you may just want to take a hands off approach for awhile and let him have the control...

Linda - posted on 01/27/2009

Quoting Kriss:

anyone have any advice on toilet training little boy?? really struggling

I had a hard time with my son at first too! I knew he was "ready" for it, but he just wasnt interested at all! We tried cheerios in the potty and  rewards (bubble gum was his favorite thing and not usually allowed it, so we had a bubble gum machine for him, and if he went he got to put in the penny and get a gum) but it still didnt work. I finally just told him no more diapers, and if he pees he is going to be wet. He pee'd once right in his pants....and that was the end of it. He used the potty every time from then on out.  Was a little messy to clean up, but never had a problem again since that day!!! 

Marlene - posted on 01/27/2009

My health nurse told me that for some reason most kids are three or over now before they are trained, whereas one time it was a lot younger than that. I agree with one of the other posters here, I found that if I continued using diapers, he was depending on them and didn't care about peeing or pooping in it as long as he knew he had a diaper on. But if he had underwear on he would go pee in the potty! He knew when he c themould and when he couldn't. As for overnight, I went cold turkey too and to my surprise there have been very few accidents. I was reluctant to try over night because my little boy was still waking up in the morning with wet diapers, but he is doing great without them!

Quinshara - posted on 01/27/2009

I have a 4 year old and I taught my son how to potty by throwing a handful of cheerios into the toilet. I then told him we were going to play a game. I asked him to try and pee on the cheerios. He thought the game was so fun, he couldn't wait to go. The only thing was that in public he would say loudly "I want to pee on the cheerios!"LOL

Silvia - posted on 01/27/2009

Just do not push him...it will delay everything. He will be ready soon! My 13 year old was a hard one...my mom came to visit and tried with him ( she tought I was not doing it right!). She gave up....one day,he woke up and told me that he wanted underwear...it took him a week. He was 3 1/2...With my 5 yr old, he was potty trained at 3...same thing he decided to wear underwear and that was it. What I heard is that boys are harder than girls...

Kyla - posted on 01/27/2009

Another thing to try is to put some kind of liquid soap in his potty. When he pee's it will make bubbles....

Robin - posted on 01/27/2009

It will just come naturally. My son was 4 when he was fully trained.

Kristine - posted on 01/27/2009

With 3 kids I have tried it all. My son went pee with no problem, but the other he did not care if he messed in his pants. After a year of this (from the time he would go pee on his own) I finally figured out the bribe that would work. he loved Tiger Milk Bars from the health food store. Honestly I was already going to buy them but it hit me to use them as a reward. I siad every time he went big job he could have one. He went 3 times that first day. never had a poopy pants again.

DD#1 we realized was ready when she kept pulling her pants down and going on the floor. She would go great for a month or 2, then revert back. Nothing worked, it just took time.

DD#2, she started a little later but she loved praise above anything else.

What I am trying to say is that you have to figure out what motivates your child. ONly you can do that unfortunately. lol Perhaps it is a trip to the park, a toy, or renting a movie. Perhaps he really just is not ready yet. Supposedly boys do tend to potty train later than girls.

Some people make up a chart to put in the bathroom. You get a stor (or sticker the child loves) for trying to go, one for pee and one for poop. After so many stars you get a treat.

Best of luck and trust me, this too shall one day become just a memory.

Staci - posted on 01/27/2009

I am trying, too! My little tike just turned 3 and we have good days and bad days but nothing consistant. He's my 3rd child and you'd think it would get a little easier but not. My other son was difficult too but it finally clicked with him somehow. But if anyone has any other ideas please let me know. I'm desperate!

Janel - posted on 01/27/2009

My oldest is a girl who at 1 year was potty trained. My next two are boys... ugh! My oldest didn't do it until he was ready. We flirted with it for a while, back and forth. I created a goal chart that he would put stickers on when he went, and would get prizes ($1 items) if he went poopies! Worked here and there, but then, one day, I brought home a whistle and a $1 store dirt bike for his prize bowl! Well, that was it... he wanted those two things, and boom, that night he was potty trained. Obviously, he was ready and lord knows we were! By this time, he was 3-1/2... Sorry!

As for the next, well, he'll be three in March and just says "no" when we talk about it. I learned my lesson with our older son as I was always so frustrated. With this one, it'll happen when the time is right (or I find the right prize)!

P.S. -  I tried all the games & gimicks below, and quite frankly, until he decided to do it, it wasn't going to happen!

Good Luck.

Annette - posted on 01/27/2009

Try the ping pong ball in the toilet and try and get him to sink it.

Candice - posted on 01/27/2009

I bribed my son with Hot Wheels and candy. Don't knock bribery! It worked for me. He was trained in 2 days with the Hot Wheels and the candy worked for a year after (for poops... "How do you get to have a piece of candy???" "By going poop in the potty") 

But seriously, for the first 2 days, I had the potty in the living room in front of the tv and we didn't leave the house, not even once. You have to give it your full, complete attention until they have it down. Good luck!

Annette - posted on 01/27/2009

Try the ping pong ball in the toilet and try and get him to sink it.

Shannon - posted on 01/27/2009

let him pee in a fruit loop.

Roma - posted on 01/27/2009

Kriss....make it a game!  Do you have Cheerios or Fruit Loops, Apple Jacks?  Add a little water in the training potty and then add two or three of the cereal.  Tell him to try and aim in the middle of the cereal.  It works and is not so expensive it will break you!  Good Luck!

Heather - posted on 01/27/2009

I have a 4 year old boy and never really pushed the issue until he was turning 3 and we went out to a friends house and i forgot the diapers it was a true accident (lol) and I told my son that he needed to be a big boy and go on the potty and he has been trainned since that day with only maybe 4 accidents. My aunt has 5 boys and said never to push potty trainning with boys cause they end up taking longer. So i found out that when they are ready they will go and learn fast

Tracey - posted on 01/27/2009

Quoting Kriss:

anyone have any advice on toilet training little boy?? really struggling

dont force it i tried loads of times with my son from 2 onwards because of pressure off other people then one day he just decided himself that he was ready and was dry day and night within 2 days aged 3 and 3 months  so dont stress about it .

Christine - posted on 01/27/2009

One thing that helped our boys was when Dad would go into the bathroom they'd both tinkle together.  Once you conquer urnating in the toilet, then I'd move on to poop.  It makes it easier.  Pooping, I would first try incentives and also if he is regulated and you are able, just sit him on the toilet around his usual time and just sit on the edge of the tub and talk to him.  Sometimes when they are relaxed that helps.  Then he'll be excited when you praise him for doing a great job. I still would work at undies though, I have 5 boys & 1 girl and the undies always seemed to give an incentive.  Just make sure you are quick to change him should he poop and make sure he knows it yucky and stinky.  Worked for me, but every child was a little differnt.  Good Luck!

Melissa - posted on 01/27/2009

I have an 8 year old boy. When he was about 2 1/2 I put pull ups on him, but he kept using it in them. So I just put underwear on him, he peed in them once and used the bathroom every time after that. The problem with the pull ups is that it still feels like a diaper to them!

Heidi - posted on 01/27/2009

I let my little guy go bottomless when I could. with nothing on he was able to pay more attention to when he had to go to the bathroom. he didn't have any accidents either. it's worth a try. for us it was better than having him have accidents in his pants.

Jennifer - posted on 01/27/2009

it was really hard to potty train my son..... I just kept conslitantly asking him if he had to go... but I found that if you bring the to go get big boy underwear helps and I just said to him if you have to go potty let me know cause you don't want to get scooby dirty.. and it worked great. cause your not presuring them to go potty but when they get the hang of it they never stop... and make sureeverythime he does go potty give him LOTS of praise he will love it.... oh.. and there will be times that he will go in there and not do anything but stand there,,, I just let my son get used to looking at the toliet to that wayhe wont get scared of it. my son was.. now he loves to flush the potty. watch the toliet paper lol.. oh one more thing.. peeing is easy for boys to learn but going number two can really scare them...oh... if you only have him sitting on the potty let him stand up its more fun for them.. good luck I hope it works

Jessica - posted on 01/27/2009

Well, I have a few things. One is let him use the big toilet and sit him on it backwards. Forget about all the baby seats and all those toilet covers. Another is don't use pull ups or anything like a diaper (cold Turkey mom) The next is to make him clean up his own messes when makes them. Make him wipe up the pee, put the poop in the toilet and flush it, and rinse out his own underwear. You might have to go back and do it your self after he finishes, but he gets the idea that it's not fun to clean it up all the time. My son was almost 3 by the time I decided to quit waiting for him to be ready and it took like 2 weeks. Of course, at bedtime there still might be a problem. Once again I got a mattress cover and made him strip his bed every time he peed in it. Stopped giving him liquids after 6pm, and made him pee before bed. I know it sounds mean, but it worked. Best of luck to you.

Kirstie - posted on 01/27/2009

hi i have a 4 yrs old son and all i can say to you is to make sure u have a potty in every room he foes in and to let him wet him self then he will not like it and make a huge fuss of him when he does use a potty and tell him when u need to go to toilet  teach him its somthing big boys do .....

Denise - posted on 01/27/2009

Bribery...pure and simple. Don't get the wrong idea..he wont. When ever you do well in life, you get more money, bigger house etc...bribery is ok.

I got a gumball type vending machine and put my sons favorite thing in M&M's. At first everytime he went on the potty with help (when directed) he would get one penny. He could save it or put it in the machine.

After awhile when he would go by himself he would get one penny for pee and two pennies for poop. ( you will see that they really hate pooping in the potty) Again he could save it or put it in the machine for M&M's. What ever he chose to save he could use on the next visit to the store.

Also we would put cherios in the potty and he enjoyed tring to "sink" them.

Hope this helps

Vickie - posted on 01/27/2009

well with my 2 boys,,, i went cold turquey ... gave their diapers to friends that needed them ... only put pull ups for naps and to bed at night !!! the rest of the time they walked around in the underwear ... beleive me they didn't like the feeling when they got their underwear wet ... for my second child,,, he had problems pooping on the toilet ... my mom told me that with us,,, she would sit us on the potty until we "did" something ... so i brought books,,, games in the bathroom and stayed there until he pooped (of course he had to go) !!! it took an hour but he didn't hold it in after that !!!  my boys didn't like the potty ... they went straight to the toilet !!!

maybe he's just not ready ... my daughter,,, until new year's eve,,, told us that she wanted to be a little girl so she could poop and pee in her diapers (we told her to be a big girl she had to go to the potty) ... i was so upset because i thought it would never happen (she will be 3 in may) ...  then the next day,,, she told me that she wanted to be a big girl ... i tell ya that ever since then,,, she only wet her undies twice and this includes bedtime !!!

good luck !!!

Vickie - posted on 01/27/2009

well with my 2 boys,,, i went cold turquey ... gave their diapers to friends that needed them ... only put pull ups for naps and to bed at night !!! the rest of the time they walked around in the underwear ... beleive me they didn't like the feeling when they got their underwear wet ... for my second child,,, he had problems pooping on the toilet ... my mom told me that with us,,, she would sit us on the potty until we "did" something ... so i brought books,,, games in the bathroom and stayed there until he pooped (of course he had to go) !!! it took an hour but he didn't hold it in after that !!!  my boys didn't like the potty ... they went straight to the toilet !!!

maybe he's just not ready ... my daughter,,, until new year's eve,,, told us that she wanted to be a little girl so she could poop and pee in her diapers (we told her to be a big girl she had to go to the potty) ... i was so upset because i thought it would never happen (she will be 3 in may) ...  then the next day,,, she told me that she wanted to be a big girl ... i tell ya that ever since then,,, she only wet her undies twice and this includes bedtime !!!

good luck !!!

Toni - posted on 01/27/2009

I always trained my 2 boys bottomless for a week or so or until the got it. I don't like the pull ups, they know that they are diapers and even underwear, they would think that they were a diaper. The had there own potty, and would be put on it every half hour, and when the do go they start to get it. Then before long they will go to the potty. Then start them wearing underwear, to get use to them. Once they get what going to the potty means, it is like a light bulb goes off. Then it won't be long befor night time also but wait a little longer.

Tanya - posted on 01/27/2009

We waited for warmer weather when my little guy was close to that age....since we live out in the sticks I didn't think it was too big of a deal if he had to go outside to pee (most men do this anyways when they "feel the need" right?!)

Once he had mastered the out-door element we moved it to in the house, and used Cheerios as targets...the wonderful thing with Cheerios is that they generally pop back up, so they're good for more than one flush! This one took a little more doing though...he still wanted to pee outside!!! The first snow fall took care of that though,,,,a little too cold for Wee Willy!  Most boys love little dinky cars and I have used them for "rewards" for some of my day-care kids- A whole day clean and dry and the $1.00 car is worth it's weight in gold!!!

Some nuts are harder to crack though...in my 10 years of being a child-care provider I've only had one who regularily wet himself after the age of 4...finally (and knowing his fear of doctors) I suggested to the frustrated parent (in the childs' presence) that perhaps there is a medical issue and a visit to the good Dr. might be needed-wink,wink,nudge,nudge-....he's been clean and dry since!!!

Good Luck !!

Tanya - posted on 01/27/2009

We waited for warmer weather when my little guy was close to that age....since we live out in the sticks I didn't think it was too big of a deal if he had to go outside to pee (most men do this anyways when they "feel the need" right?!)

Once he had mastered the out-door element we moved it to in the house, and used Cheerios as targets...the wonderful thing with Cheerios is that they generally pop back up, so they're good for more than one flush! This one took a little more doing though...he still wanted to pee outside!!! The first snow fall took care of that though,,,,a little too cold for Wee Willy!  Most boys love little dinky cars and I have used them for "rewards" for some of my day-care kids- A whole day clean and dry and the $1.00 car is worth it's weight in gold!!!

Some nuts are harder to crack though...in my 10 years of being a child-care provider I've only had one who regularily wet himself after the age of 4...finally (and knowing his fear of doctors) I suggested to the frustrated parent (in the childs' presence) that perhaps there is a medical issue and a visit to the good Dr. might be needed-wink,wink,nudge,nudge-....he's been clean and dry since!!!

Good Luck !!

Kerri - posted on 01/27/2009

My son would not even try to go for me. My husband and him played a target shooting game in the toilet with a piece of floating toilet paper. He had so much fun playing the game he would call me in to see him do it when daddy wasn't home and challenge my husband to a game when he came home. If you treat if like work they won't like it. He thought it was hillarious so he tried harder and harder to make it there. They have to be ready and you have to find what works for him Good luck.

Lorraine - posted on 01/27/2009

I'm not sure how old ur lil' one is but have you tried putting something like fruit loops in the toilet and ask him to try to get one when he's goin' potty? or one other thing u can do is try just putting on like under wear then when he pee's he wont like the feel of it then will want to change. that is a really good way that is how i trained my 2 younger kids. Good luck

Nikole - posted on 01/27/2009

I was blessed to not have any problems training my son. He was trained by 1 1/2 and I was not a stay at home mom. Just be consistant. My son loves music so i started with the singing potty since everytime you sit on the throne it sings and vibrates. I also read below the cheerios is also a great one too. He also helps them with the aiming issue.

Noel - posted on 01/27/2009

my mom told me to wait till my son was ready and i did he was trained be the time he was 3 so just be patient it will happen!

Patty - posted on 01/27/2009

be patient boys take a loittle longer than girls.throw some fruit loops in the bowl and tell him to try to hit the hole they think its fun,but dont worry they do get sooner or later,

Holly - posted on 01/27/2009

My son is 3 now.  For long time he didn't want anything to do with potty training.. he would only use the toilet when we put him on it.  And after a while even prizes and stickers and stuff meant nothing.  What we had to do was go straight into underwear.  I kept reading about people doing this and I was like "this is not gonna work with mine"  But I had a long weekend off work and I figured I give it a shot.  If it didn't work we'd just go to the next thing.  So that is what I did.  He picked out his own underwear.  The first day or 2 we had some accidents.. but what really did it was one time that he peed in his underwear after he sat on the toilet I put the same wet ones back on him.. when he realized what I did he was UPSET! After that he went to the toilet everytime.  Now every once in a while there are times where procrastinates and is a little wet by the time he gets to the toilet but he's doing great with it.

Andrea - posted on 01/27/2009

well my lil man is 7yrs now and what i did when he was training ,was to put the cheerios in his little potty chair and tell him to aim in there. and just try to make it a game... but put the chair in the bathroom... not in the living room or nothing like that... take him to the bathroom with you when you go and tell him to do the same and try to hit  the cheerios. dont do the cold turkey thing that is just nasty. thats why they sell pull ups that they can feel if they are wet and show that they are wet and you just have to show him.

Katrinda - posted on 01/27/2009

I AM NOT SURE IF YOU HAVE TRIED THIS I PERSONALLY DON'T HAVE BOYS BUT I DO HAVE 2 NEPHEWS AND A GODSON BUT WE TRIED THE PUTTING DETERGENT IN THE WATER TO LET HIM MAKE BUBBLES WHEN HE GOES. THIS HELPED AND MAYBE A FATHER OR SIBLING GOING WOULD HELP ALSO.

Sarah - posted on 01/27/2009

sorry major typos... wasn't paying attention to my typing

Sarah - posted on 01/27/2009

My son is competative but with out competition he doesn't want to do anything. I'm an advocate for the fruitloops method. 2 points if he nails yellow 4 points for blue 10 points for green... etc.. Just make sure whatever cerial you're using isn't one you eat. My son ate chereos so I didn't want to associate peeing with his breakfast cereal. Instead I used a brand I hate... worked out well. He was potty trained in less than a month... now the whole pooing and whiping might take years to perfect... hell most grown men don't have the process down until old age then they're back in diapers so it doesn't matter either way lol.



My girlfriend used mickey mouse to get her son to want to be potty trained. (fav stuff animal works too) she put mickey on the toilet and rubbed his back a little then mickey pooped (she dropped raisens in while rubbing the dolls back) Nicholas (her son) went nuts over it. "OMG mommy Mickey Pooped... look mommy!!!!!" he was so excited that the next time he tried on his own.

Danielle - posted on 01/27/2009

Go with sitting down at first; or try putting cherrios/fruit loops in the toilet for "target practice" For BMs put him on there for at least 5-10min. after each meal as eating usually triggers pooping and make it a relaxing fun time by reading to him or quietly playing a lap game. If he is freaked out about the flushing sound do it after he leaves and once he is consistently going on it you can teach that later. Also, ditch the diapers (when around the house), it is messy the first couple of times, but with my son the icky feeling really increased his motivation to try the toilet. I had to clean up about three times and then he quickly learned to use the toilet. Hope that helped not sure what part of pottying you needed help with.

Leanne - posted on 01/27/2009

my little boy is now 2 yrs and 4 months and just got the hang of knowing when he needs to go do a wee..summer is a great start..get fun looking jocks and i started with them ova his nappy,every morning we changed his nappy and he wanted jocks on..it kept going on til he said he doesnt want a nappy change he wants "jocks change" so i told him he has to tell me when he needs to wee as the nappy isnt there to catch it...he watches his father and uncle go endlessly out on a tree he was interested and started weeing on grass..hasnt yet got the hang of when he needs to poo, and it is gross but hell soon learn!dont worry if hes not ready its not uncommon,im hoping my otha little boy now 5 months will be as easy and willing..

Deidre - posted on 01/27/2009

I agree - no more pullups. stay home for a week and let him be naked. you may have a few messes, but pullups DON"T work.

Jodi - posted on 01/27/2009

i did that and then it took years of getting him out of the habbit of pulling down his dacks any where and going. did it mant times when he was young in the playground, very embarrasing

Jodi - posted on 01/27/2009

I had alot of trouble toliet training my son, he is now five and its all good but a few years ago it was driving me crazy. He use to run up to the back of our yard and do a poo and then come back, he just wouldnt do any business on the toliet. But then i caught him in the process ran him to the toliet and he then did his first poo in the toliet altghough it was hanging out og his bum by the time i got him there. I made a huge deal of how good it was and also brought in the sticker system, every time he made it to the toliet he got to put a sticker on the bored, this showed him how well he was doing and he could think he is great. it took some time, but eventully it did work. Hang in there it will change.

Nardine - posted on 01/27/2009

try when your out side playing make a rock or tree a place he can go and learn to shake as well then go inside

Patricia - posted on 01/27/2009

With my son I used a coffee tin he loved the sound of his pee hitting the can worked great...Good luck:)

Samantha - posted on 01/27/2009

Hi, I don't know if someone has told you this already but I put a ping pong ball in the toilet and he loved aiming for it, because it is hollow it doesn't flush so you don't have to worry about clogging up the system.  He was toilet trained in about 2 weeks, (during the day anyway) but it's a start.  Good luck with it and just remember in a couple of years you'll look back and laugh about it, I know I do.

Sam

Sharon - posted on 01/27/2009

I used bribes again but in the form of a sticker chart when he got 3 stickers he got a chocolate. This did not take long it probably helped that he had an older sister to copy 3 weeks latter at 2.5 years he is fully trained and is even wearing jocks to bed

Dana - posted on 01/26/2009

This might not be popular, but a bribe worked very nicely for me.  My son was showing little interest in potty training around the same time that I was ready to get he and his twin sister their first little bicycles.  We went to the store, they picked out their bikes, and I told them they could have their bikes when they started using the potty.  We put the bikes in the garage and not surprisingly, the trips to the potty became a regular occurence.  I was careful to not let this set the tone for other big milestones, but in this case, all he needed was a bit of motivation and a shiny, blue spiderman bike did the trick.

Megan - posted on 01/26/2009

Use a ping pong ball in the toilet, and the him to aim at it. Make it fun and everytime he uses the toilet offer a little surprise. It doesn't have to be lollies or chocolates, maybe build a cubbyhouse out of chairs and play for a while. Make it enjoyable.