anyone having teenager problems?
Nu - posted on 11/17/2009
Sorry to skite but I have the best 16 year old daughter, dont really know how I did it but I appreciate every day as it comes. Boundaries You gotta have them, we have a lot of fun together, ive allowed her to have a party, took her to her Auntys hens night, where she saw a lot, some parents may frown upon that but ive always treated her like a clever intelligent mature person, and thats exactly who she is today. Im not saying its been all smooth sailing, treat them how you want to be treated, but also let them know who pays the bills, and who is responsible for them, till they move out get a job, they will figure it out for themselves who they are and who they really want to be!!!
Tara - posted on 11/13/2009
I think it would be a better question to say is anyone not? Teenagers are a constant challenge. Be firm and consistent no matter what. Also do not let them rile you up and pick fights, kids love to start drama and then watch us react. When my sixteen year old start mouthing off he is sent to his room and he is not allowed out until he can be human again. So it is his choice to be decent to us or spend his teenage years locked up in his room. They are children, we have the control and what we say goes period. No discussion. It helps to have others around you reinforce this message whether it be a father, role model or family members.
Delia - posted on 11/13/2009
talking back is defined differently by different families. As our children become teenagers we need to allow for exchange of ideas that may come from oposing views. Adolescents are learnig who they are. Try not to quickly respond in anger. Be slow to speach and quick to listen. Do expect respect, but also give it to the teen. Show your love for them even when they fail. My children are adults now. So I'm telling you it works to be respectful. To firm a line on your position may end in suicide as my friends child did this summer. Mamma couldn't accept that the child was looking at other world views. Acceptance during this growing phase by the parent could have resulted in less conflict. LOVE is the answer
Betsy - posted on 11/11/2009
Our oldest is 19, and he, like most, went through the mouthy stage and thinking he knew everything, while we didn't know anything. It does pass, but during it, stay firm and consistent. Also, stay calm. If you lose it and argue on their 14 yr old level, you lose, and sometimes it is difficult to remain calm and in control when they have tested your last nerve. Same with young children, have consequences for bad behavior and be consistent with discipline. If you let it pass sometimes, you lose credibility and go back to square one. It can be a trying time, but if you maintain respect as the parent even when they feel like they hate you, they will mature and start to realize that maybe Mom knew what she was talking about after all :-)
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