At what age should a mother talk to her daughter about her period?

Cassandra - posted on 08/24/2010

I think the sooner you start talking about 'periods' with your daughter the less nervous and complicated the whole issue becomes. I started talking to my daughter about it when she was around 8ish mainly because she had older cousins and I didnt want her to misunderstand anything, obviously as she got older (now 11) the conversation has evolved, she doesnt have her period yet but is fully prepared fo when it comes. I think the most important thing is that your child doesnt get nervous or scared to talk about it, it needs to a subject that is tackled on an even keel, no nonsense and no drama associated ith it, girls these days get their period pretty young, as I said my neices both got their cycle in yr4 and 5, the best policy is to be open about the topic and not make anything taboo!

Leanne - posted on 07/07/2009

you should probably start around 8 or so. I have heard of girls getting it as early as 10 so it would be a good idea for her to be well aware before it happens. My daughter has known since she was little and caught me in the bathroom and asked " mommy why are you bledding?" lol I told her all women do once a month I didnt go into more detail until she was a little older as she was only 3 then but she knew how babies came out ( c section and natural) periods, boobs all of that by time she was ohhh about 6. the earlier you start, the more time you have to build a good trusting relationship with your daughter :) mine will be 17 in decemeber and we are like BFF's. She tells me everything, and I do mean everything! wow!

Leanne - posted on 07/07/2009

you should probably start around 8 or so. I have heard of girls getting it as early as 10 so it would be a good idea for her to be well aware before it happens. My daughter has known since she was little and caught me in the bathroom and asked " mommy why are you bledding?" lol I told her all women do once a month I didnt go into more detail until she was a little older as she was only 3 then but she knew how babies came out ( c section and natural) periods, boobs all of that by time she was ohhh about 6. the earlier you start, the more time you have to build a good trusting relationship with your daughter :) mine will be 17 in decemeber and we are like BFF's. She tells me everything, and I do mean everything! wow!

Sonia - posted on 07/07/2009

Personally, we've chose to keep body and sex issues an open conversation since birth. Really. We've always called body parts by their proper names (with the exception of shortened names for the butt and such and the occassional jokey name like "bits"). We treat the body with great respect and no shame. Bodies are natural and wonderful is our position.



My daughter is 7 and she already has the beginnings of an understanding of a woman's cycles. She's come into the bathroom when I'm changing a pad or seen me in the shower and asked questions. I call my menstrual cycle my "moon cycle" and my period "moon blood." I've explained that, every cycle (unless a woman is pregnant or nursing a lot) the womb prepares for a new baby. If a baby isn't conceived, the uterine lining is shed so that a new cycle can begin. She knows that the moon blood is normal and natural and doesn't harm me. I've tried to approach my own cycles with honor and gratitude for myself and I think I've passed that on to my children. Even my 4 year old son knows that Mommy has moon blood every month and that it's okay and doesn't hurt me (the site of Mom bleeding can really freak kids out). My daughter has asked more detailed questions about cycles, such as when babies can be conceived and such. I've answered them as best as I can and w/ respect to her developmental level. It's worked so far for us.



Personally, I want my children to have a good understanding of the body and the way it works. I want them to respect and honor the body. I think that's important for both boys and girls. We also use natural family planning and so I have quite a bit of experience and knowledge about the menstrual cycle. I hope to pass that knowledge to both my daughter and son. Of course, my daughter would need a more detailed understanding, but I think my son will benefit from a basic understanding too. I really wish I'd known what was going on w/ my body when I was teenager and a young adult. LOL. I really feel like that knowledge helps me to feel a sense of awe and appreciation for my body.



Anyway, my point is that it's really never too early to open the door to those conversations. Kids ask questions. We should provide answers as best as we can. The answers should be compatible w/ the questions the child's developmental level of course.

Kathleen - posted on 07/07/2009

i remember my mother telling me about periods when i was maybe 10 and she brought me a packet of pads and showed me how to put them on a pair of underwear and i fully understood it then. i dont think you should do it too young because it might be a bit scary lol but we didnt have videos or anything like that at school so i needed my mum to tell me about it!

Pam - posted on 07/07/2009

Well, they start talking at school around 9-10 years old. Now, my twins are just past 12 and Sami has started her periods, but not Caiti (the elder.) But, at the earlier age, just skim over things, get the window open for them to know that they can come talk to you and that there's nothing gross or embarrassing about it. I didn't make it out to be a huge scary event and so far, Sami has handled really well. It also helps that my cycle hits the same time so I can help "remind" her when the time is getting close to have pads or whatever with her.

Hope that helps and good luck!! By the way, be ready for the moodiness......

Brenda - posted on 07/07/2009

I don't know what they do now, but I was in 4th grade when the school did the whole talk and videos with the boys and girls (separately) about all that. So I would say around that time would be good, since the school should let you know when they are going to do it (if they do it still, which I think most schools do). That way she knows she can talk to you openly about it, and not just with her friends.

Stephanie - posted on 07/07/2009

I have always been a very open mother with my daughters. it is nothing for them to walk in the bathroom and talk to me. My daughters have seen the "yuck" in the toliet after I peed. Sry to be so blunt. My daughters would ask why I was bleeding and I would tell them. i started my first period at 9 yrs old and flipped out because I thought I had done something wrong. i knew nothing about what was going on. I starting talking to my children about safe sex at very young ages. I have never made my children leave the room during "adult talk". If our children do not learn these things from us... we don't know who might be teaching it to them. Back on topic... be open as early as 7 yrs of age. Remember the body fat has to do with when they may or may not start as well as age. Just be open like you were a friend and start explaining simple parts piece at a time.

Margaret - posted on 07/07/2009

I believe you should talk to her maybe about the age 9 or 10, only because some girls start there period about 10. Be sure you speak to her in terms that she can understand, with my girls i purchase a book about becoming a woman ,it helps with terms to use and photos.

Kerri - posted on 07/07/2009

Hi! I have not had to deal with this yet, but a girlfriend of mine, just went through it this year. Her daughter turned 11 in December and in the 5th grade here, they do a film for boys and a film for girls, so right before, the daughter was going to see the film, my girlfriend took her daughter out without her dad or her siblings, explained it to her, the best one can. The movie was shown at school, she openly spoke with her mother about the film and asked my friend any additional questions she thought of and when the daughter got her period this past month, my friend and her daughter were both as prepared as they could be and it had a nice happy ending. Really! Almost sounded to easy, but it is one of those things we have to talk to our girls about, b/c if we don't someone else will and I would not want anyone else to share this time with my daughter. again i have two years before my turn comes, so it is easier for me to recite her story than to be feeling any of this myself. Hope her great story helps! Good luck!