at what point should my son start taking a shower on his own?

Rose - posted on 10/14/2009 ( 24 moms have responded )

24

13

3

I have 4 boys the oldest of whom will be 6 tomorrow. Ever since my second could sit up well on his own I have been bathing them together, but the tub is getting really crowded. They like taking a bath together b/c it's fun for them, but they always end up fighting b/c it's so crowded in their, plus my youngest is almost 4 months now and it will be time for him to get in soon. I just don't have the time or the inclination to start seperate bath times or days for each boy so I have been thinking it's time to get the oldest to start taking a shower on his own. It would really be helpful to me if I could just say "go take a shower" and not have to worry about it. Here's the thing--he's afraid of water. I've tried several times in the last year to help him learn to shower on his own, but I always stop b/c it's so frustrating for both of us. He's just afraid to get his face wet. so my question is this: if your children shower on their own, how did it come about? how old were they? and if they overcame a fear like this, HOW?

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

24 Comments

View replies by

Jennifer - posted on 08/20/2012

0

3

0

My daughter started when she was almost five (she is now 7). I had to push her a little bit, because she wasn't use to the water coming down on her head and face. I started by supervising her and then leaving the door open in case she needed anything. Now, my 3 yr old daughter takes showers with her sometimes, and she helps her little sister.

Kim Sue - posted on 08/17/2012

5

0

0

my oldest son was 7 when i finally got him to take his own shower and the only reason why is because for a whole year I showered with him and he would always either hide behind me or turn and hug me as tight as he can i one day said that it was time to take a shower started to undress and when i was undressed and got him in the shoer i left didnt bother taking my clothes and he did not realize i was not there

Alana - posted on 07/18/2011

76

32

1

he overcame his fear by having a "shower bath" , ie, put the plug in the tub and let it fill up while he showeres, and letting him wear swimming goggles wich helped with the water on his face thing, as he was most scared of it going in his eyes. thyen we used to tel him to take a big his breath and then put his face to the water and blow bubbles in it, we gradualy got him doing it without the goggles and now he loves the shower he prefers it to a bath. plus, can still play with his toys of its a "shower bath" . my son is 5 x

Karen - posted on 10/28/2009

248

40

27

I used to let my twins bathe together also in the tub until they got too big, and ran out of room (around 3 to 3 1/2 yrs.). Now at 4 they take their own baths. I let them help me run the water. I quickly wash them down, and then let them have a go at it with the wash cloth. They even do a fairly good job most of the time by themselves. It just takes practice and coordination with the wash cloth. Then we rinse and dry off, and the other twin gets in right behind the other one. The whole process takes about a 1/2 hour total. They no longer play in the water. We also wash hair twice a week because they hate to have water in their eyes, and their hair really doesn't need to be washed as often as a person who has gone through puberty (when things change with skin and hair basically). I personally was 13 when I started taking showers. My boys at 4 yrs. are scared to death of showers and I won't push the issue with them until they feel ready. Good luck! Oh, and I'd like to know about the kids shower heads. I remembered reading something about that in one of the posts here. =0)

Mary - posted on 10/28/2009

40

44

2

I have been reading some of the post and the one where the girl sits in the shower and washes while the shower is running well hun my 18 year old still does that and he would be in the shower/bath for an hour at a time so 10 minutes is nothing. Not sure if he still does it this way cause he is out on his own now and pays his own water bill so who knows.

My daughter in law has a 7 year old girl who takes showers and to tell you the truth it is still a mess to clean up, water everywhere and when she took baths the 2 yonger kids would bath with her and that was a mess to so who knows what the answer is, i think it trail and error at this point.

[deleted account]

Hello,

My girls are 8 and 6 and they started taking showers with me at a very young age. My 8 year old was 5-6 months when she had her first shower with me. They enjoyed getting in and sitting on the floor playing while I showered then I'd help them with theirs. Now we live in a house where the shower is too small and it is only a shower-no tub, and they have been taking their own showers. My oldest was afraid to get her face wet too. We got a shower head that has a hand held and that helped enormously. I could stand next to the shower and help rinse their hair after they or I had washed it. They get in sometimes and just play. Different things help different children. Encourage him, explain that it is a privelage as being the oldest and the others can't take a shower yet. Or even have the 2 oldest start taking showers so he doesn't feel like he is being singled out. Good luck. Robin

Norma - posted on 10/14/2009

3

30

0

my 2 oldest take showers every morning b4 school. my 10 yr daughter will stand in the shower sleeping for 20-30 min! i have to keep on her and tell her to hurry or she will miss her bus. we keep her hair short so it is easier for her to clean and take care of. my 7 yr son will be in the shower for 10 min and be done. my 2yr son will take a shower with me or daddy every once in awhile, but not pushing him. i have a friend that has 4 kids and hers are 7,6,5,3 and she gives ALL 4 a bath at the same time. its just what you feel comfortable doing. mine took showers with me off and on from birth, but we reached a stage where it HAD to be a bath because they couldn't play in the shower.

Carlene - posted on 10/14/2009

20

24

0

My duaghter has been taking showers since she was about 5 and is now 7. Like most parents I had to help ease her into it by using a washcloth on her face when shampooing and not putting the water head spray directly on her. I will tell you one thing, which unfortunately was a bit of water wasting, she would sit in the tub with the shower on and do her washing. Kind of a shower-bath. It helped a lot to let her figure her own way into the process, but we have no problems with showers now.

Elise - posted on 10/14/2009

102

25

3

My son is still a baby and obviously doesn't shower on his own yet, but have you tried the bath visors? They are cute and fun and will keep that water out of his face! Good luck!

Katie - posted on 10/14/2009

187

39

15

Hi there,
My son first asked to shower on his own when he was 4. he also hates having water on his face and will not have a direct flow of water on to his face. i showed him how to have his head back with getting minimal water in his eyes and if too much goes on his face he needs only to step away. 99% of the time we shower together but sometimes he does want to do it alone. He is never left in the shower alone as i sit on the loo and make sure all is right. He needs help to get the shampoo out etc, but he enjoys doing it on his own sometimes. perhaps you could start showering with him in a morning and then seeing if he wants to try on his own, as long as he can't play with the temperature control. You could try bath time alone but that often is accompanied by play time, instead of just showering to get clean... both have their advantages. Hope this helps

Tina - posted on 10/14/2009

173

27

19

I started letting my daughter start taking a shower on her own at 9 years old. She is almost ten now, but I still have to go in and wash her hair because she does not do it well on her own. As far as your son being afraid of the water, how about the removable shower heads....then he is in control of the water. I do feel that you still need to check in on him and make sure he is doing things correctly.

Lisa - posted on 10/14/2009

19

23

1

My son is 6 years old and has been taking a shower by himself since he was about 4 1/2. You may want to ask him if he would like to have some time to himself. Most kids by that age are starting to become individuals and don't want to always be with their siblings. I am sure he would love some time to himself. It was so cute when my son was in the shower for the first time he started singing this cute song. " la de de la de da da " I got it on video, but of course it was from the waist up. :) I'm sure if you sit down and talk with him he will be more than willing to jump in the shower himself.

Jennifer - posted on 10/14/2009

5

30

0

My daughter is almost 3 and loves to hop in the shower so we let her whenever she wants. The only thing we haven't been able to do is get her to let us wash her hair but eventually she will let us do that too if we push her. I think you just need to work with you kids and ask them. Usually they will find the shower fun and new and exciting and may take to it quickly.

Libby - posted on 10/14/2009

2

23

0

Well the best thing I could suggest would be to start having keep a wash cloth on his eye while you rinse his hair, tilting his head back....don't put it on his whole face cuz he'll panic, SHOW him with your fingers where the water can come down on his forehead without going in his face... explain to him that the further back his head is the less water will go in his face. Maybe tell him it's no different than playing in the rain... good luck :)

Krista - posted on 10/14/2009

4,111

52

264

Have him cover his face with a cloth anytime that he needs to put his head in the water. I'd start bringing your youngest in the shower with you...or with Dad. That's how I got my son to NEVER be afraid of water. I could dump a bucket of water on my son's head and he wouldn't care.

Eleanor - posted on 10/14/2009

8

39

1

Lets see. What I did whenever i bath them was told them to either put their head down/back, whichever makes them feel safe and ask them to close their eyes when washing their hair and face. I also use a no tears shampoo and whenever they didnt cry of feel scared I told them what a good and clever chil they are. Once they were okey with it and not afraid I let them try bath themself while monitering them until I was sure they could do it onw their own. All my kids started bathing themself age 4 and they just love the water now. Sometimes I even have to ask them to stop playing in the bathroom! I hope I have been some help to you.

Melissa - posted on 10/14/2009

20

23

2

oh yeah, if it makes you feel better, my husbands sister is 15 and she just started showering at 13. she took a BATH up until then. lol... but to each their own!

Melissa - posted on 10/14/2009

20

23

2

How about a BATH on his own. I know moms who's 6 year olds run their own baths and take them by themselves. If he does a good job washing, why not?
If he's not good at washing yet, teach him to do it well... I think he will be fine.
ps, i have a 2 year old that almost showers by herself. LOL. I give her the shampoo and she goes to town. Give her the loofa with soap on it and she washes.

Susan - posted on 10/14/2009

74

19

9

My son started taking baths on is own when he was 5 or 6. I would wash his hair, but leave the rest of it up to him. He didn't start showering on his own until this year at 9. And we still had issues with him getting all the shampoo out of his hair for the first month or so. He was sent back up to rinse again several times. My in-laws gave my children a kids shower head that attached to the regular shower head. It's shaped like a fish and sticks onto the wall at kid height. My five year old daughter will sometimes use it, but it's just the novelty of something different. She doesn't actually shower consistently with it. Good luck in the transition!

Rachael - posted on 10/14/2009

1

9

0

My boys were around 5 yrs old when they started showering on their own, all of them had the fear of getting water on their face, I was stern about it - suggested using a face cloth to hold on their forehead while tilting thier head back to keep water out of their face, after a while they become cofident that water is not going to get in their eyes ..ect..eventually they want to do it on their own ...battle won !!

Jackie - posted on 10/14/2009

623

44

93

My daughter was scared of water in her face too. So I let her watch me shower a few times to show her how little water I actually get in my face and how I'm in control of where the water goes by what I do with my body and head. My worry at 6 years old is they should still be playing and that's an accident waiting to happen. Have you considered putting the younger ones in a bath together and letting him bathe on his own? My daughter started the change from bath to shower around 9 years old. If she asked to bath and had the time I let her. But I intentionally set up "running late" situations that forced her to shower. Now she showers every morning before school with no issues. I just wish I could convince her it doesn't take 30 minutes to shower now!

Ericka - posted on 10/14/2009

5

18

0

my kids started when they were about 5 or 6 and they were afraid of water to so they would put a wash cloth over there eyes well I washed there hair and then they would finsh the shower there self and that worked and after awhile they relized there was no reason to be afraid of water and they stoped using the washcloth and they now can wash there own hair and take showers on there own.

Wendy - posted on 10/14/2009

56

5

7

hya rose, well lets see my first one started to shower at 5 yrs old ,she didnt like the water in her face either so i pointed the shower head away from her ,but i always washed her hair telling her head back and i put my hand on her forehead and said close your eyes so the water was blocked by my hand ,that worked because it was detatchable from the wall , a hand held shower head gives them control ,hope this helped a little i did it with all 3 kids and it worked for me.take care and good luck ,wendy

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms