can the father of a baby be taken off the birth certificate?

Steph - posted on 01/26/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

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i really want to have the father of my 8 week old baby taken off the birth certificate because i don't want him to have any parental rights or be able to see my son. he's barely been around to see him & has yet to do anything to support him & his rage & temper has gotten out of control lately to where i fear for the safety & well being of me & my son. hes hit me & psycially asulted me in the past but stupid me didn't file police reports so i have nothing on file to show it. he keeps insisting on seeing our son without me there & threatening to drag me through court to make sure he does or to take him away from me when he does make any contact with me which is maybe once every two weeks...i do not want him anywhere near my son without me there but he doesn't want to hear it because he doesn't think hes doing anything wrong...i just dont know what to do...please help!

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Jennifer - posted on 07/15/2012

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can anyone tell me if the father of my child can take his name off the birth certificate in the state of wisconsin.. after of six yrs of my sons father not being there for him he is now trying to sign his rights off .. i just need some to know if he can or not ..

Iridescent - posted on 01/28/2010

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Leave the name on the birth certificate; if you're not married, he had to sign a Recognition of Parentage to put it on, or have paternity testing done, and either way it's done. Next, custody rights vary a lot by where you live.

Our twins' mother had 2 other children that are older. The first she shook and nearly killed, and she lost all parental rights. A year later, she had another baby and that one was neglected to the point she lost parental rights. The twins were born 4 years later, and my husband (their father) was there for them. They were being neglected by her anyway, and headed right to abuse. Eventually, Labor Day 2008 she texted him and said she was kicking the kids out and he could get them or not, she didn't care. She didn't want them anymore. They were 1 year old! So we drove 8 hours to get them and all the things of theirs we could, and came back home with them. We contacted social services the next business day as well as a lawyer. By then she had filed a police report accusing him of kidnapping the twins, even though they are HIS children, and she kicked them out, plus had abused 2 other children so badly she lost all rights and had reports filed and proven through social services that she was abusing/neglecting the twins, PLUS she was on probation for sex with a minor and was to have no contact with minors. You know what it all summed up to? Social services informed us that if she demanded the twins, we had to bring them to her. Drop them off. Go to the police station. Report it. Social services would go pick them up. Return them to us. Otherwise we would be charged with kidnapping. This is in Minnesota.

You can leave. You can do anything you wish, just make sure to take care of yourself and your baby. You do not have to allow visitation at all until the baby is at least a year. You do not have to ever allow unsupervised visitation if you can prove he's a danger. You may be able to get visitation revoked completely. You have more rights than you know.

Good job for making such a good decision for yourself and your son!

Cassandra - posted on 09/26/2012

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Hi Steph



Not sure what country your from Hun but in Australia, apply for MEDIATION is your 1st STEP (you must know his current address) He will be ordered to show to an appointment to work out a suitable parenting plan. Mind you as the bubba is so young; you would get 100% care till they turn 1. Then it would move to shared care which people aim at being 50% with mum & 50% with Dad. Thou allot of people never agree to 50/50 due to clashing schedules.



If he chooses NOT to show up to the mediation appointment; you will be issued with a CERTIFICATE from the family relationships centre. This enables you to commence court proceedings. You can't go to court, till you show you have tried to work out your issues.



Once in court you must realise - YOU leave it up to a Judge to decide what is in the BEST for your child. So mediation is the best avenue to avoid allot of legal cost & stress + your ex & yourself BOTH show you can work together as ADULTS to benefit the child. Remember KIDS FIRST & put your issues aside.



Also if bio-logically the CHILD'S father....he should pay child support even without seeing the baby. You will need that money in the future!!! Like Christina said "If he threatens you again, call the police and get a restraining order. Anytime he calls you harassing, file a report with the police. This will make him look really bad in court and the court will be in your favour." You need to get PROOF of his harassment & abuse unfortunately with you calling the cops each time he harasses you no doubt you will get a AVO and/or ADVO ;o)



Keep in mind a "consent order" is much better than "court order" try to work out a reasonable order you both agree to. Good - Luck! Never forget he is the father & has just as much right as you to be in this child’s life. The fact he wants to fight for his rights to parent shows he cares....his just stupid next time he threatens "to drag me (you) through court" just say "REALLY! That's funny haven't heard anything about mediation" Some people are so narrow minded there is a LONG process even before court.



Hope everything works out for you and your bundle of JOY! Stress less in the meantime & FOCUS on being the best mother you can be :o)

Andrea - posted on 01/27/2010

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They told me that as long as my boyfriend (now my hubby) were not married that he had no rights to our son when he was born.. That was 2 years ago and now 2 kids ago.. I give big congrats on getting your self and son away from him.. The only advice i can give you is find people that would be willing to go to court and speak on your behalf.. (that they have seen or knew that this was going on) Go to your local CPS. DHS or whatever it is called in your area speak with them and then get to court ASAP.. I have a girlfriend who has a son that will be 5 years old in just a few weeks and the "sprem donor" (as i call him) as never seen or asked about him.. When she went to get child support they put him on the birth certificate with out her finding out about it till weeks or even a month later.. They told her that she could go to court and tell the judge everything and have his right taken away.. That takes alot to get a judge to do.. So she had friends that knew how he was speak for her and her son.. He was told he could only see him if it were done in a safe place with a Case Worker there with them.. I would really get to court and get some type of court order.. I really hope this is helpful... Take Care and Best Wishes.. If you have any question or just need some one to talk to Send me a message...

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Steph, I saw your other post. Do not take him off the birth certificate, I'm not even sure if you can. He has no parental rights, per se, right now because there is no court order in place.



If you take him off the birth certificate, you will never get child support. My mom raised me without child support, and it was too hard. Don't do it. Your baby NEEDS that money.



If he threatens you again, call the police and get a restraining order. Anytime he calls you harrassing, file a report with the police. This will make him look really bad in court and the court will be in your favor.



Until there is a custody/visitation agreement in place with the court, posession is 50 percent of the law. I forget how that saying goes. But, it means that whoever has him, HAS HIM and doesn't have to give him back. Don't ever let this man see your son alone (until the courts have defined the custody/visitation) because there is a possibility he won't give him back, and that wouldn't be illegal.



So, tell your ex that will only allow him to see his son in a public place with you there or maybe at your parents' house with your parents there, or his parents' house with his parents there. Make sure there is ALWAYS someone else there. If he wants to see his son, he will do this or too bad.



Are you living with your parents? Are you planning on working when the baby is a little older?



P.S. Don't tell him that posession is 50 percent of the law, because he might not know that and you don't want to give him any ideas.

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Susanna - posted on 01/27/2010

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Oh and by the way I am so Proud of you for getting out of that Domestic violence Relationship.. Good Job... It will be hard but I think you have the strength to do it!!! Say no to Violence against women!!! This a government funded campain in Australia.. Also start going to your local community support service and seeing the social workers. get to know them and let them know your story. They maybe very helpful to you and the courts in the future.

Susanna - posted on 01/27/2010

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No You can not take him off the birth certificate!!!!! Also get court orders ASAP until you have a court document stating that the child is to be in you custody he can take the child at anytime( unlikely but he can). Now that he is on the birth certificate he either has to sign away his perental rights and get the court to agree that this is right for the child. Or the court has to take away his parental rights. Good luck Cheers:)

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