Cant Take Lack of Sleep no More PLEASE HELP!!!

Jody - posted on 07/23/2009 ( 25 moms have responded )

12

12

0

My daughter is almost 8 months old now and she refuses to sleep through the night. Ive tried everything you can think of. Shes breast fed and wakes up about 3-4 times a night on average and on bad nights every hour.

Ive tried making sure she has enough food in the day, also offering her more breast milk in the day and also water. Ive tried getting her in a routine in both the day and night. I offer her water in the night.

Nothing seems to be working. She will wake up, take a small feed of a bit of water and go back to sleep for anything from 1 hour to 3 hours before waking up again.



Does anyone have any ideas why she might be doing this and any ideas on how to stop her waking up all the time. I would love her to sleep through but would be happy if she only woke up once or twice a night.



The lack of sleep if just getting to me now and making it hard for me to function during the day.



Please help

xxx

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Muriel - posted on 07/24/2009

8

3

1

I don't know if you've called your pediatrician but there could be something bugging her, like an ear infection or teething. If that's not the case, there is the Ferber book for helping children who are having trouble sleeping. I myself could not follow it completely but it did have some helpful hints. If you have family nearby maybe they could come over and watch the baby while you nap and get some well deserved rest. Good luck!

[deleted account]

((hugs)) You are an awesome mom! Congrats to you for everything you're doing :)



Is she the right weight? If so, then you're doing the right thing only offering her water. Next, try just patting her on the back. She needs to learn how to self soothe. We had to do a 5 minute rule and let her figure out how to self soothe, if she did within 5 minutes then we didn't go in, at 5 minutes if she was crying, then one of us would go in, rub her back, and go back out. She does go to sleep with the ocean sound of the sleep sheep. SO if she wakes in the middle of the night we turn that back on (it shuts off after 20 min).



What really helped us during the day was feeding her on an exact schedule for a couple of weeks so she would get hungry and expect it. As she trusted us to give her the foods/breastmilk, she would sleep longer in the night. We started that around 2 weeks and by 7 months she was sleeping 12 hours straight. We also don't change her diaper in the night unless she poops. She hasn't ever had a diaper rash.



Hoping to help! You're doing awesome so stay strong and know your baby loves you so much!!!

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

25 Comments

View replies by

User - posted on 07/26/2009

6

24

0

my daughter used 2 do this aswel wen she was 6 months now she is 2 years n 5months but i was not breast feedin her i had her on formula the hunrier baby milk which was no good 2 her as she was still wakin up 5 -6 times a night so if ur baby is drinkin from a bottle i can onli sayin crumble up half a baby rusk with her milk in a bottle it wil fill her up more n wil help her sleep it wil take some time but u can do it my little girl only started goin all night wen she was 10 months old xx

Toni - posted on 07/26/2009

259

16

18

It sounds to me as though teething is your problem then. Try upping your fluid intake. Speak to your health visitor or doctor about alternating paracetamol and Ibuprofen based medications.
I remember one Christmas, LO was teething badly (although I didn't know it at the time) and had a terrible cold too. I had a cold as well. She was waking every hour on the dot. The only way she could sleep was in my arms but I was at a relatives house for the holidays and in a single bed. I worried about dropping her out of bed in my sleep or smothering her so she stayed in her travel cot. She was about 1 yr old. It was the worst 2 weeks ever. She had every medication I could possibly give her - alternating calpol, childrens neurofen, Karvol and eventually bongela. Very little worked. She would sleep in exhaustion by 6am, so I would sleep with her not rising till about 11am. God knows what the relatives thought, but sometimes it's the only way you can cope. Sleep when baby sleeps and if you can, have someone else give you some respite.
My mum once told me how she very nearly threw my sister out of the bedroom window because she would not sleep and wouldn't stop crying because she had croup. My mum lost the plot due to sleep deprivation and my grandparents had to travel 350 miles to take my sister for a couple of weeks to give my mum a break. She also had me and I was about 14months old at the time.
Get some help before it gets too bad.

Jody - posted on 07/26/2009

12

12

0

she is teething and we have tried giving her some calpol. It does settle her back to sleep after and without it she just continues to cry.

Im wondering if my milk isnt of great quality as i know i havent been drinking alot of fluid and ive heard you need to drink alot to keep your milk supply nice so maybe shes not getting enough milk each feed. Just an idea xx

Toni - posted on 07/26/2009

259

16

18

I would say your parents are right in that she should be learning now to self sooth. It doesn't do the child any favours if you do that for her, it's just delaying the inevitable and putting you through misery in the meantime.
However, I'm wondering if she's teething. Have you tried giving her a little calpol or rubbing some bonjela on her gums? I'd have a feel of her gums and see if she has any tender or red inflamed areas in her mouth/gums. My daughter went through episodes like this even though she could self sooth. She learnt to sleep on her own straight from coming home from the hospital (thank god for my mother). I really wanted to cuddle her all the time and watch her sleep in my arms. But my mum said watch this after I'd finished feeding her. We laid her down in her crib, she lay there looking up at her mobile then slowly closed her eyes, it was precious. But my daughters teething seemed to go on forever. Just as one set of teeth would come through and we'd get a couple of weeks of uninterrupted sleep, the next set of teeth would come through and it would start all over again. It took me a few months to figure out what was happening though. My sister was luckier in a way with her baby, his teeth came through several at the same time. So although he spent a few weeks to a month crying a lot, it was over in a much quicker time span.

Mel - posted on 07/26/2009

5,539

58

226

you coudl try giving formula for the night bottle with rice cereal in it, should get her to sleep through, or try controlled at that age shes probably just waking out of habit and definately does not need to be fed every 3-4 hours

[deleted account]

I want to say thank you to all you moms out there (from Texas). Such kind, sound advice you've given Jody. Every parent/child relationship is different. My first had terrible reflux, and we ended up overfeeding him. Sleep deprivation. I remember it - and I'm now a grandmother of 7. lol Good luck to you, Jody. And keep up the excellent communication you all have going! Mary

Jody - posted on 07/25/2009

12

12

0

that you all so much for your help and advice. Ive certainly got a few ideas to think about. I think for starters im going to make more time for her in the day as i am suffering from PND and not giving her as much time as i could. Im also going to buy the book recommended by Lori Nogueira.
Its just so hard because my parents keep going on and on about how i should just put her own room instead of having her cot in with me still and telling me that she shouldnt still be in my room at 8 months old. They say this to me and yet i dont feel at all comfortable in doing that and i really didnt think it was a problem at all. Are they right it what they say or do you think they are just being old school and talking rubbish?
x

[deleted account]

I throughly understand what you are experiencing! It is very difficult, and you did the hardest, yet most important step, which is to reach out to others! You are doing a wonderful job. I would recommend taking the little one in to the doctor, stating your sleeping concern, and have the doctor assess for any problems. You can also visit your local health clinic, and usually the nurses can give you a wide variety of materials to help with night time routines. If you have family, lean on them a bit. I'm sure they would love to watch a cutie patotie baby while you get some rest.

Lori - posted on 07/24/2009

18

8

0

I had the same problem with my son. Everyone was telling my to just let him cry it out, but I just could not do that. I tried it for couple of nights, and that is all I could stand. So I started reasearching other methods on the internet and found a book. It is called "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley, and it saved my life. It teaches you about a baby's natural sleep rhythm, and how to help your baby learn how to sooth themselves to sleep. It gives you step by step methods on how to get your baby to sleep through the night. It also has chapters about weaning from the breast altogether, and the bottle. It is just a great book. I still reference it to this day and my son is almost 2.

Sharyn - posted on 07/24/2009

258

9

17

my daughter has 3 meals a day .... mashed fruit to be precise. she also has her formula bottles with rice cereal in them ..... her last bottle is the one she goes to bed with, and wont wake up again until 7am ... altho these days she wakes up at 5am to be soothed back to sleep and is out again until 9am ....
her bedtime without fail is 8pm ... i leave her to it in her crib and she falls asleep by herself ....
i know that no sleep is exhausting, i havent had 8hrs since i got pregnant 16 months ago ... 3 - 4hrs a night sometimes not even that .....
i've heard that breast milk doesnt fill them up as much as formula but since i'm not a breastfeeder i cant say yay or nay to that ......

Bonnie - posted on 07/24/2009

30

12

1

Have you discussed this with the pediatrician? Normally between 6 and 4 months, some babies start eating rice cereal. Your pediatrician should be able to give you a recommendation. Also, my baby had reflux. He was crying and we thought he'd been hungry, but it turned out he wasn't. He was in pain, but he couldn't distinguish between hunger pains or any other kinds of pain, so he stuffed his fists in his mouth. Talk to your child's pediatrician though. That's very important.

Tamara - posted on 07/24/2009

1,192

11

104

This is pretty normal. Mine is 21 months old and is just now at the point of waking up only 1-2x/night. Do you cosleep? I found that was a lifesaver and a half.

Jennifer - posted on 07/24/2009

1

4

0

My son had trouble sleeping the first year also. I breastfed him for the the first 14 months and there were many times he would do the same thing to me. There were days I thought I would loose my mind! My mother and sister gave me great advice- they told me that I was the parent and my son was the child and I couldn't let him run the show and dictate how things were going to go. I realized that they were right and started with a strict schedule of naps and feeding. It was hard for me to just put him in his bed without rocking or feeding him to sleep. After about 3 full days and nights of doing this things started to click and we have not had any problems since. He is three now and sleeps through the night consistently. Good luck and I hope you start to get some sleep!

Linda - posted on 07/24/2009

19

6

0

My daughter didn't sleep through the night for the longest time. Is she actually hungry, or looking for your stimulation? If it's the latter, I recommend breaking her of that habit- and quickly. I weaned and sleep trained my child all in one weekend- sounds harsh, but it had to be done. My daughter was looking for me to comfort her during the night, I'd wake up multiple times during the night to rock and feed her... but I noticed she wasn't actually feeding, just snuggling in my arms. So, I started to let her learn to self soothe. Instead of jumping up to her every beck and call, I'd give it a few minutes... then I'd sneak in, make sure everything was all right and sneak back out. It was horrendous the first and second night, but by the third night, she was fine. I wouldn't pick her up or talk to her, but I gave her reassurance that I was there. I feel for you, and I know how terrible it is to be deprived of sleep. I hope you find something that works for you!

Jody - posted on 07/24/2009

12

12

0

thank you so much everyone for all your help. I might have a bit of PND to be honest. Ill try giving her more mummy time and if that dont work ill try a specialist. Thank you all again xxxx

Aleks - posted on 07/23/2009

546

0

45

My first born was doing that too... turned out he needed more mummy comforting... ( I was going through PND - didn't know it either ), the more I pulled away, the more he demanded of me at night - constant wakings, feeding, etc. This I can only now see in "hindsight". I am not saying you have PND, but she may be just in need of extra mummy time - do it during the day ( if possible ). I ended up co-sleeping, and it helped somewhat ( once I got treatment for PND things really did improve ), at least I got better sleep.. :-)

Kylie - posted on 07/23/2009

2,391

81

190

are you nursing her to sleep? My 8 month old does and so he often wakes every 3-4 hours looking for me for comfort. The only way i survive the days is to have him sleep beside me so when he wakes i give him a pat or a feed and we both fall back asleep quickly without fully waking. sometimes he will sleep 6-8 straight hours in my bed but i found in his cot he wakes after every sleep cycle. maybe check the temp of your daughters room she may be waking because she is cold. babies do learn to sleep through when they are ready, also babies who can fall asleep on their own generally will put themselves back to sleep when they wake during the night. However teaching a baby to "self soothe" often requires crying and weeks of sleep training and is something i could never do to my children that is why we co-sleep.

Erin - posted on 07/23/2009

6,569

25

232

Definitely look into the sleep specialists. I live in Australia and we have a service in our state called Tresillian. It's government-run and does day and overnight stays where they monitor you and your baby then assist in finding a solution.
Ask around and you'll probably come across someone who has needed this service and can give you some advice. Otherwise talk to your doctor or baby nurse and they'll be able to point you in the right direction. Good luck :)

Lydia - posted on 07/23/2009

1,723

21

164

I dont know where you are. I'm in perth and we have a group called NGALA (www.ngala.com.au) they even have a section dedicated to helping with sleeping issues. If you are elsewhere you can probably find a similar group on the net (if you want I can help web search with you)

Jody - posted on 07/23/2009

12

12

0

yes shes having solids. Im doing baby led weaning with her so she has her breastmilk, and also baby cereal in the mornings and yoghurts at lunch and cereal at night. Thats ontop of her baby led weaning food which is things like pieces of fruit and veg, potatoes, pasta, chicken, ham etc.



Can you recommend any specialist groups?

Lydia - posted on 07/23/2009

1,723

21

164

Is she having some solids? She may need something that isnt as easy to digest as breastmilk before she goes down for the night. Otherwise it would definately be worth finding a specialist group who can help you with her sleeping patterns. In the meantime find a family member or friend who can look after her for a morning/afternoon and use the time to have a nice hot bath/shower and catchup sleep to help you keep some of your sanity! Hope you find a solution soon :)

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms