Daycare morning DRAMA!

Lyndsay - posted on 04/29/2010

I used to work at a preschool as well. There was a high turnover rate there and the kids would react to that since they had to get comfortable with new teachers all the time. Could this be an issue?

Tracy - posted on 04/29/2010

It might be a combo of not wanting to leave you and not liking the daycare. My daughter hated when I left her with our babysitter-- she just didnt like her. We switched sitters and now LOVES when I leave her!

Linda - posted on 04/29/2010

Good evening. I haven't been on here as much due to my mom having cancer, my only advise is to pray and ask God to show you if something is going on. No matter how many opinions come at you; you will never know the truth until it is brought forth.

Louise - posted on 04/26/2010

I have worked in many play groups and nurseries and I saw this nearly every day. A lot of children see the reaction on theirs mums face when they cry and then do it every day because this becomes a habit. Try not to react at all when you leave her and just walk away with a smile on your face. I know this is hard but it I am sure as soon as you are out of sight she stops and carries on as normal. Your daughter thinks that you expect her to cry so does every day. I don't know how old your daughter is but if she is od enough to reason with tell her that you would really like a smile today a nursery and then overly praise her if she manages not to cry. Give it a go!

Liz - posted on 04/26/2010

It could be that something's wrong or it could be your child's behavior, or who knows. I know my boys were going to an in-home daycare. The 3 year old screamed every morning, but didn't want to leave in the afternoon. We found a routine that worked for him. Every morning we would do the whole hug & kiss routine then he'd say "bye, have a good day". Then he didn't cry. Some mornings I would have to take him potty, or wait in the living room while he pottied, then take him to the kitchen for breakfast. He would still tell me every morning that he didn't want to go, but he didn't scream & cry.

When my 2nd was born, we were still with the same daycare & he never liked being there. He would scream when I handed him over. I was told later by her helper that he spent all day in his playpen or in a small gated off area seperate from his brother & the other child (he was over 1 year old & walking by this time).

Now we have both kids elsewhere & they both love it. My older one enjoys going to "school" & the younger one will willingly go to his caregiver from my arms.

Christie - posted on 04/24/2010

I completely agree with all of the posts regarding your comment....just wanted to say my son, who will be 3 in a few weeks, STILL has mornings that he cries and carries on when I drop him off for 'school'. I was so worried about it I asked my Sister to take him a few times to see if it was the school part he was having issues with or the Mommy leaving part... Every time she would take him, he would give her a big smooch and hug and tell her "see you later ReRe!"
I also had my husband take him to see what reaction he had to Dad dropping him off..... Same as when my Sister took him. LMAO Little bugger! hahahaha
So I did what a few suggested below... I dropped him off, and I went and ran to the bank... took about 15 minutes... went back to check on him... when I peeked in the room, he was all smiles and giggles! He adored his teacher, and it was a great pre-school.
We did change his 'school' but only because of financial reasons, and it put him in a class with kids 3 to 5 and he has had less dramatic mornings, and makes me feel like we did the right thing by changing his school. I think he was ready to move up.
It is all a personal choice and we Mom's just need to follow our gut, if we think it is something more than just our kids being anxcious(sp?) than it probably is, so a change is good! If not.. like with my son, I would just talk to him and reassure him I WOULD be there BEFORE nap time to pick him up. That helped both of us feel better, and on the mornings he still had 'meltdowns'....more often than not I would stand outside the door and listen to hear how long it took for him to relax and start playing... always less than 4 minutes. But MAN some mornings those 3 or 4 minutes seemed like an eternity!

Angelia Stoor - posted on 04/23/2010

One thing you might want to consider is her age. I worked at a daycare for 3 years and was with the same group of kids from the time they were infants. They knew me VERY well and I loved all of them dearly. However, at around 20 months a lot of them developed this separation anxiety and would cry when their parents left. They were fine about 5 minutes after the parents were gone. I'm not saying that you shouldn't be concerned, I am just giving you another option to consider.

Susan - posted on 04/22/2010

I help out at my son's preschool. It is a great school, with competant and caring staff in an ideal setting. However, my son's classmates still cries every time her mom leaves her, in spite of the fact that she has attended the school for almost a year. I don't think there is anything wrong with the school or your daughter. She may just be a little sensitive or she may be playing on your sympathies. Have you ever called to check on her after you leave the school? I'll bet if you did, you would find that your daughter stops crying as soon as you leave. Most schools also have an open door policy. So, you can also stop by and check on your daughter sometime during the day. Chances are, when you visit, you will find her happily playing.

Sharon - posted on 04/21/2010

If she's able to communicate ask her what is wrong....sometimes it's the whole mommy is leaving me issue. I know my daughter cries every day for two weeks after she's been home with me for my vacation times from work and then has to go back to daycare. Lately she's been screaming her head off when I say it's time to go to school (we are preparing her for prek next year so we call daycare school). She does it because it's not daddy taking her just mommy but she has her security toy, a stuffed bean minnie mouse doll able to fit in her back pack, that smells like daddy's cologne right now. She drags that thing into daycare and holds it for an hour after I leave before putting it away in her back pack....she even takes it out for nap time and when I pick her up.

I've asked the daycare director if something happened to her at daycare when she started this all over again and she said no, she just wants Ma or Daddy. Normal seperation stuff so that could be what's going on with your daughter or there could be something else going on.

If she doesn't tell you ask her daycare teacher or the director to keep an eye out for anything that maybe bothering her as well.

Heather - posted on 04/21/2010

I agree with your decision to change daycares, my son did this with 2 out of 3 sitters and now that I have the third and I get NO complaints about his behavior and he Rarely cries when I leave I feel guilty for even letting him stay in the care of the others all day.

Kenya - posted on 04/21/2010

Thank you for your response. My daughter is starting a new daycare next month and I hope she copes a little better.

Felicia - posted on 04/21/2010

Hi Kenya ~



We tried a few different daycare facilities when my son was younger. He would cry each day for about the first week or two, each day getting less and less (I'd call and check to make sure). Over a year would lead me to question WHY is she still crying and yes, I think I'd be concerned. Have you ever gone by and checked to see what is going on and/or how your daughter is being treated? I am a huge advocate of the 'drop in' visits to just see without being seen by my child. Might give you a better glimpse at the full picture. And based on my son's actions and what I had seen, I pulled my son from a place after only 2 weeks.



I later ended up choosing in home daycare ... that I do believe to be a personal choice, one you would have to be 100% comfortable with as well who/what is available in your area. There should be a Child Welfare Agency in your area that houses a list of in-home providers who are registered with the state. That is how I found my Angel.