Deleted Text messages...

Jennifer - posted on 07/21/2011

Ok, so I just want to make sure I am understanding all of this....this happened back in 2009. And did the ex just tell you about it? If so and nothing else is/has happened since then, then why now are you wanting the past records? What you could do is just get a print out of the call log and text log. Then you can see how often he was contacting her. I have tmobile and they cannot give you anything that shows the past messages and/or pictures. I know this because when I wanted to have them all printed out in regards to myself and my ex for documentation I was told I would have to email them to myself and print them out that way.



I would say if you have not noticed anything "fishy" going on or your husband has given you no reason to feel like he is doing something he shouldn't then let it go. But if it is only bc of the ex, then I would confront her and ask her for proof before letting her ruin your marriage. But do not let the worries go on and on because ultimately it WILL ruin your marriage. Good luck! :-)

Britt - posted on 07/19/2011

Wow i would call your local cell phone company i go through Verizon personally and love it!
if i delete a text message i didnt think you can retreive them back. Thats new to me !

Chanea - posted on 06/24/2010

tell the phone company to send the bill to your address if the bill is in your name they at lest have to do that.

Maria - posted on 06/24/2010

I say that you watch his actions, are they just a reaction to your actions or are they out of the ordinary for him. When we do something wrong (m or f) it shows somewhere in our lives. Either we lose or gain weight, etc. Then ask him point blank what he wants, does he want to be with you or not. Then hold your peace and listen, don't assume or judge listen. I have to say that is the hardest part, at least you can go from there. If he wants to be with you, he will say so. Then you tell him right now you need him to show you in his actions and make him accountable.

ON YOUR PART, you need to be fair, not jump to conclusions and give him a REAL SINCERE chance to work on the relationship. I don't know how much time you have invested in this relationship, I am sure you knew about the baby momma before you got too involved. She is part of his baggage, you accepted him with it, remember why you were willing to do that then and asked yourself what has changed. He can't control her actions, only his. And if she is still hung up on him, and he is still choosing you over her. THINK BEFORE YOU MAKE A Decision you may regret. I have seen it happen. My husband and I both had a child separately before we married. We both work to keep their drama/garbage out of our marriage.

I truly hope that helps give you perspective on how to proceed. Wishing you the best!

Jessica - posted on 06/23/2010

I know the court is not going to give me a subpeona cause I think he is cheating on me. I will make my husband get them for other reasons. and I only asked her cause I have a gut feeling that something happened. It was back in august of 2009 so im sure the messages have been deleted!!

Amanda - posted on 06/23/2010

Holy days of our lives.

First no court would give you an order for your husbands text messages because you think he may be cheating. Your husband has a right to privacy even from his own wife.

Second why are you listening to the babies momma? When she told you this why didnt you ask her to give you proof?

Jessica - posted on 06/23/2010

Thanks everybody!! I told him last night that if he wants to be my husband then he will find some way to get the messages!!!

Sharon - posted on 06/22/2010

If he has nothing to hide he will order a copy of the messages.

My husbands phone was lost, 3 weeks later we finally decided it was permanently lost and it wasn't going to turn up so we called the company... to find out that someone had wracked up $3K in charges on it.

They were able to track it across the USA, sent us copies of the pictures they took & sent with it and copies of the text messages.

Again, if he has nothing to hide, he'll order the records himself.

Pip - posted on 06/22/2010

Listen to your gut, if it says this is fishy then it probably is. Move past finding out about the txt's and kick him to the curb. No one needs to be in a relationship without trust. It must be aweful to have that stress and the feeling you can't trust him and have to check his txt's. Do you really need that?

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2010

It lasted for around 3 months!!!

Angela - posted on 06/22/2010

I have never been in a situation quite like this, but always tell myself, people make mistakes, we are all human, "Once is a mistake, twice is a habit" I will not go for habit, but everyone needs room for forgiveness. I would give him a little more trust, cause without trust, their is no true relationship, if you continue to see problems arise, then you can act on it, knowing it is a habit that can't be broken, but maybe if he said he didn't do anything, but said things that he shouldn't have, sounds like he is being honest enough, so give him that benefit of doubt, ride it out a bit, ask him if he wants to go to counseling, if he does, he loves you, and wants to try and work it out. Jealousy of course, if that is the problem, can destroy a marriage/relationship with an eye-blink. Good luck!

Meghan - posted on 06/22/2010

seriously, ask a lawyer what your legal rights are!

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2010

no I have not seen the messages.. thats what im trying to do... I seen that they were sending text and pictues back in forth. she says that he started it and he sent dirty pictures and he said that he still loves her and thinks about her... He said nothing like that was said and the pictures that were sent was of the child. I don't know if she is doing this just to cause trouble cause she is pregnant about to get married. I know that she is still holding on to him though. He has lied to me in the past so I dont know who to believe... Im lost

Meghan - posted on 06/22/2010

ok, well in that case let me explain things further.
My cell phone with telus was in MY name...but the bill was sent to him. Therefore when he kicked me out of the house I couldn't access past text msg's or change my number WITHOUT his permission.
I honestly don't know how the court system would handle this situation. Cheating is grounds for a divorce so you would think that something could be done! Maybe call a lawyer that will give free advise over the phone and see what they say??

Amy - posted on 06/22/2010

I only ask because I have been in similar circumstances, did she save them to show you or is she just trying to cause trouble? What has been his response? Have you talked about marriage counseling?

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2010

If the text messages say that he cheated on me or anything like that then yes im getting a divorce!! but also the text messages are from his baby momma and she said that he did say some things that he should of not said...

Amy - posted on 06/22/2010

Are you getting divorced and that's why you need them? If not what do you intend to do once you have the text messages?

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2010

It was back in august and september of 09. I found out that i can get a subpoena for the records but I have to have an outstanding reason for the judge to give them to me...

Erica - posted on 06/22/2010

men are sneaky. my husband deletes his texts. you have to get a court order within 2-3 days in order to get any text messages. i know verizon only keeps them for 2 or 3 days. now that you're husband has been confronted however, i don't think there will be any more text messages between him and the lover. so you better act quickly.

Amy - posted on 06/22/2010

I don't think anyone will give you a court order because you think your husband cheated on you! Did you see the text messages and then when you confronted them he deleted them. Look at the phone bill is he calling her or is there a spike in minutes he's using. You really need to sit down with your husband and have a serious conversation with him. See if he'll agree to marriage counseling because if you suspect him of cheating even if he didn't you will always have suspicions until you work past whatever led you to believe he may have cheated in the first place.

Jessica - posted on 06/22/2010

Thanks.. I think my husband cheated on me and he wont admit it so im trying to see what they say!!

Louise - posted on 06/22/2010

Sorry there is nothing you can do.If you do not have the sim card there is no way of retreiving the text. I hope there was nothing to important that you lost. :(