Do you get along with your inlaws??
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Amber - posted on 12/19/2011
thankfully my husbands family is amazing they are the most kindhearted people and treat me like one of the family and they adore my son. also my family has treated my husband wonderfully he has been so good to me and see how happy he makes me so they adore him for it!!
This conversation has been closed to further comments
Penny - posted on 07/04/2009
I wish ,I knew the answers... I sometimes feel bad.. That my Husband doesn't go around his family.. but, They really make it too hard.. holidays are rough.. sit around with them and his Mother whispers to his sister and they stare .. I just hate it.. My two daughter and I are treated like outsiders.. it is really hard...
You can't let anyone make your daughter feel insecure... It is sooo wrong...
Alicia - posted on 07/04/2009
No. My husbands mom is just awful. When she isn't on her meds she can be so rotten. I wish I knew a better way to deal with her. I have always kept my mouth shut with her because I just didn't want to fight with her. But once she started doing it with my daughters I had to draw the line. She recently said my 7 year old wasn't aloud at her house anymore because she said that she touched her boob on purpose with her elbow. Come on now she isn't a little girl that would do that. She also came over one day and said to my 7 year old daughter that she was gaining weight and getting a fat belly. I turned around and gave her this look because I didn't want to make a big deal of it in front of my daughter. I just cant handle her anymore. She also told me I was a bad mom because I kiss my little ones on the lips. She said I should be thankful that I havent given them a virus or disease by doing this. She is just rotten. I havent spoken to her in months now. So now I dont get along with my mother in law. What would you do in this situation?
Penny - posted on 07/02/2009
I do not get along with my in laws... My MIL hates me... I stoled her son from her.,..OMG.. it has been this way for 9 years now... She has turned most of the family against me... I am too the point , I don't care anymore.. My hubby and I don't go around them....At least my hubby stands by me...
Libby - posted on 07/02/2009
I get along great with my father in law & one brother in law. I tolerate my other brother in law. Since my sister in law moved closer to us I guess I have to put up with her but we very rarely actually hold a conversation. I really don't get along well with my mother in law and haven't the past several years. My husband finally put her in her place last year. Yet, I still don't think she realizes this is our family. She would like to just spend time with my hubby and the kids (without me), but we are a package deal. She is just very inconsiderate and rude to me. She is going to miss out on a lot when it comes to her grandchildren if she doesn't ever change her ways.
Sapphire - posted on 07/02/2009
My FIL & MIL are wonderful people and we get along beautifully! MIL is my hubby's step-mom and she is fantastic! Hubby's real mom is 2400 miles away and we only see her once a year. For years and years I liked her. But, slowly we've lost some repect for her along the way. But I still do like my MIL, but I prefer hubby's step-mom over his real mom.
yes and no.. My FIL is great, but my MIL and I just don't get along. Like the one comment above, my mother died when I was 8. My dad loves spending time with my 3 boys and so does my FIL... but to get my MIL to want to spend time, it's rough... When my 1st son was 6 months old, my SIL was pregnant with a girl, my MIL made the comment that she couldn't wait to have a little girl... Boy did that make me feel bad for my son... Then I had twins after that and both boys... With an 18 month old and twin 7 months olds... It's sad with how she is, but I don't think things will change.
I don't get along with my inlaws perid because since my father-in-law passed away my husband's half brother became the man of the house and told my husband that my girls are welcome and him but not me. We had up and down with them now i put my foot down they are never to see my girls again. They never remember my girl's birthday my husband has to be the one to tell them guess what today is such and such birthday come on. you can never forget grandchildrens birthdays but they don't forget each other. I am sorry but i had to let it out.
Ruth - posted on 06/17/2009
I love my inlaws! They are great. They live really close by, so it's nice. They take the kids alot. Once in a while my father in law gets set in his ways, and I'm very stubborn and we argue but still gotta love em. My mother died of breast cancer 3 years ago, so I'm glad I have a 2nd mom.
Adrienne - posted on 06/17/2009
Ugh...one yes and one no! My father-in-law is awesome. My mother-in-law however is not so great. I have tried to foster a relationship between the two of us, as well as between she and my children with no results. She lives only 20 minutes away and I can't even get her to come see my kids. I even tried hanging out with her and doing stuff that she is interested in and nothing there either. I guess it just bothers me because if my mom was alive, I would have to change the locks on my house on a weekly basis to keep her away!!! I just don't get how she could not want to see her grandkids!?!
Mel - posted on 06/16/2009
my father in law and sister in law are fantastic but MIL is terrible. she lives 10 mins down the rd and has never even come up to see me and her grand daughter during the day and she doesnt work. but i guess you cant pick em just have to put up with them
Leigh - posted on 06/16/2009
I've been with my husband since I was 17, so now 20 years on, I pretty much thought I knew my MIL, FIL. Over the years we've had our ups & downs. My FIL was a christian minister, & used all his time with me to get me to have his god walk with me.(I'm not religious) He was an extremely dominante man, who thought his opinion was the only one that was important, but he always showed his children love & respect. I put up with the impromptu bible readings, etc over the years, made much easier because we moved to another country so only had limited contact. My MIL has always been devoted to her children & her grandchildren & was always there for support. My FIL passed 2 years ago, & has left a huge gap in the family, but I have gotten to know my MIL again, & she surprises me with how different she is now, being her own true person. Prior to her husband passing, she used to agree or pretty much agree with everything he said, but now she truly expresses how she's feeling, what she's wanting, when she's disappointed, when she's happy, what her ambitions are. My MIL has shown me more unconditional love than my own mother & I have a much better relationship with her than my own mother, but most of all I'm greatful that she gave me her son. I can only hope that when my own boys find the loves of their lives that I will have a great relationship with them as well.
Lin - posted on 06/16/2009
Yes and no. With my DH's dad and his wife, I get along great. We've only known each other for about a year, but they constantly keep in touch with us, hang out, invite us over, etc.; in fact, due to problems with my family, my step MIL is my back-up contact for Jeff (DH) while for this current pregnancy.
With my DH's mom and her husband, things aren't so great - whenever she calls its to get Jeff to fix her computer, to get us to start attending her church (Jeff goes to one closer to home - even the same denomination, but its not good enough), etc. - she really doesn't seem to care about what's going on with us. In addition we are only involved in her activities when she needs to show us off, as if we're her friggin' petting zoo, in addition to making Jeff the butt of many of her jokes, especially certain conditions that he is sensitive about (he has a very particular diet and is literally afraid to eat anything different, so she, and the rest of the her family, decide to make what's on Jeff's plate the topic of conversation and they love their dry sense of humor). Not to mention every Mother's Day since we've had Nick has been hell - she wants it all about her and throws a fit, and she made several nasty comments referring to me miscarrying my first one, while I was in a high-risk pregnancy with said child, on my birthday. So yeah - I acknowledge her for Jeff and Nick's sake, but otherwise I don't care much for her (and her husband is just as bad).
Rhionna - posted on 06/16/2009
I get on great with my FIL but have a love hate relationship with my MIL, she has times when she just takes over, she has this really annoying thing of introducing people at her church to my kids and then expecting me to stop and talk to them when they see me in town- I wouldn't mind but I don't know who they are or why they are talking to my children and she doesn't seem to think that they are essentially strangers and I don't know them!
She also stands over my shoulder when i'm BF my 6 week old baby- I don't mind feeding my baby in public but to be stared at from someone standing right behind you is a little weird in my books!
Saying that, she has been a huge help looking after the kids, esp when I went into labour with my little girl- I had planned a home birth but there was meconium in my waters when they broke at 3.45 and she was at our house within 30mins so I could go to the hospital!
Jocelyn - posted on 06/16/2009
I'm also happy to say that i do get along with my inlaws. His mom I kinda knew for a while before I met my dh, and when we got together she told her son that I was the only girl he had dated that she didn't want to slap lol. So that's a good thing! And his sister and I are basically the same age and we have kids the same age (and we're the same dress size too! haha) and they are both good with conner (my son)
Tomica - posted on 06/16/2009
I get along with my inlaws just great. My mother in law loves me to death and his family treats me and my daughter (not his biological daughter) better than my own family sometimes. I think the key to getting along with them is having boundaries and holding your own. By that I mean your household is your household, you run it and shouldn't stand for any nosebutting unless advice is requested. Even then you have to hold your own and stick to 'what you say goes' period.Just because you ask for advice doesn't mean you have to take it. Most importantly you have to be able to take criticism and pouting when you don't do something that you were expected to do.
Antoinette - posted on 06/16/2009
I am happy to say that I do. When my husband and I first met 15 yrs ago (at the time we lived in Calgary and they lived in Dauphin) they came to visit and we all went on an outting...well from that moment on they told my husband that he better take care of me and that I was a keeper! They accept me for who I am and I accept them for who they are. It is great but don't get me wrong we do have our differences too!
Michelle - posted on 06/16/2009
I can't stand my in-laws!! Although I have my reasons!! My MIL has actually gotten physical with me over my husband (then he was just my boyfriend) moving out of their place and into mine! Needless to say I try to steer clear of them as much as possible. My hisband is great though and understands why I don't care to be there often. I do go over sometimes so they can see their grand-daughter, but even that is touch and go! Which is sad really, I feel bad that my daughter will probably never have a close relationship with either of them all because of my MIL's ways. She still to this day will pick fights with me and try to get my hubby to side with her!
Rebecca - posted on 06/16/2009
i would say with my in-laws i don't at all. we don't speak the same language and they don't accept that fact. i have a son and another child on the way but they don't seem to care anymore. their youngest son just had his first child with a girl who speaks their language and they now spend all the time with them. we go out of our way to drive 8-9 hours to visit with them and they don't seem to care at all. i hate visiting them every time and would much rather stay at home then spend 16-18 hours in a car to visit someone who could care less. they have only come to visit us once and say they don't have time off work to visit...my father in law is retired and my mother in law still works but they somehow find time to go on 6 week long trips 2 times a year. even at christmas we make the trip to see them and she refuses to take even a day off work. we have not gotten married and when we told my mother in law the date she said it didn't work for her becuase she cou'dnt get it off and she would prefer if we got married on a long weekend so she make the drive...so nope we don't get along and it's a safe assumption we never will.
Tanya - posted on 06/16/2009
For the most part .... But the in-laws allow our Daughter to rule the roost @ their house. So she comes home weekends with them very unruly. I just started grounding the in-laws on weekend visits ( Papa is starting to get worst then Nana). If they do not start disciplining her they will have a very lonely summer @ camp without her!
Sadie - posted on 06/16/2009
hey i get on with my in laws as i live with them, its only my husbands mum and sister we live with as his dad is in a care home as he has a brain tumer and not really recovered from the op he's been in there for nearly 3 years. i get on with my husband antie and nana aswell
we have been lucky in the fact that my mil kinda leaves us to it to look after our son. but se does do a bit of babysitting etc
No, my in-laws & I don't get along. They were nice when I was pregnant, and when bub was born they wanted to see bub every weekend. But then I became a single mum & they didn't like my independence so they got quite nasty & now we no longer have any contact with any of the in-laws! My brother has 2 kids & his in-laws have basically moved in with them, coming and going as they please & taking over with the children. I think that's over-stepping some boundries but it's his in-laws & although he doesn't like them much he seems to tolerate them for the sake of the family. I suppose it's different with each family, but it seems you either love or hate the in-laws...but it's easier to get along with them for the kids sake, unless you live far enough away to avoid them! :)
Stevie - posted on 06/16/2009
i can say i use too i love my husbands dad he is awesome and funny but my husbands mom and i idk how she has recently decided to think but i dont really get along with her so much right now i just tolorate her she is a bit crazy in my eyes and we dont agree on how to parent thank god we dont live with-in a 100 miles of her but i did like her when me and my husband were friends and dating and threw i believe most of the engagement and i never hated her when we got married i really just started to really hate her she has decided to say something and she got her butt chewed out for saying it
Dawn - posted on 06/16/2009
kind of...but sometimes i feel like my MIL is always try to 1 up me with the kids.
like last Christmas every gift that i said i wanted to buy for my daughter she went behind my back and bought. we had our eye on a vtech laptop for her but she found a "better" one and got it!!! needless to say, i learned my lesson there and now i don't tell her what we're getting!! but other than that i think we're ok...at least in person. not sure what's said when i'm not there.
Margaret - posted on 06/16/2009
Do you get along with your inlaws??
Sometimes. The main problem is that we have such different interests and activities. I do costuming events and my SiL does jazz dance. My idea of a good time with friends (other than dinner and movie) involves RPGs, while they would be more interested in watching baseball.
For the most part, I think we've agreed to disagree.
What really helps is that my husband is great with my parents, because they will talk to him and respect his opinion, even if they don't agree with it.
Join Circle of Moms
Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.Join Circle of Moms