Does anyone else have a really overbearing mother in law who thinks she is the third parent to your child? What do I do!?

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Lily - posted on 11/17/2012

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Again she sounds just like my mother in law lol. Two weeks isn't too bad! Im just nervous how she handle it because she hates being told shes wrong. I am also a first time mom but that doesnt mean im incompetent , I like help but when people assume I need help on everything its too much. Yes I will tell her everyone parents differently lol, thanks for the help gave me some confidence that im not alone haha.

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Lily - posted on 11/18/2012

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Yeah I will I just need a really nice way of saying it since she can be very defensive lol...any ideas?

Mary - posted on 11/18/2012

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talk to your husband about it and just sit your mom-in-law down and tell her i dnt mind your advice but i dnt need your as a thrid parent

Dove - posted on 11/17/2012

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If you can't talk to her and sort these things out there is NO WAY I'd be leaving the baby alone with her under any circumstances.



She directly disregarded you as his mother and if he's under 6 months and she gave him water it could potentially kill him.... Not exactly the kind of childcare provider I'd be after.



Good luck figuring out how to deal with her!

Lola - posted on 11/16/2012

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Lol thank you I had to be brave because I was either not bathing her for long enough or I was giving her to much milk and silly things like that I mean come on I'm a first time mother what's the difference if I feed her every 2 hours or every two our and 5 minutes what's five minutes gonna do? Lol it took her about two weeks before we got invited over to lunch again! I must admit I was shocked to be invited and he fact that she didn't push her nose in everything shocked me :) just know that what your doing is best for your son and I can guarantee she made many mistakes as well!!

Lily - posted on 11/16/2012

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wow you're brave! lol. Your ex mother in law sounds a lot like mine... it feels like everything I do is wrong, every time I go over she has another opinion. Either Im feeding him too much, or I heat the bottle too warm or Im giving him too much attention so hes going to be spoiled. It actually got to the point where I asked her not to give him water and she did when she was babysitting after I said no because my doctor said no. I want to talk to her I really do but she is fiesty lol. My husband doesn't like talking to her about things either because she gets very defensive and she will be watching my son when I go back to work soon so I really dont want to her piss her off lol. I feel stuck ! I suppose I could try but I know it will be ugly....God love her but that woman is really hard to deal with ! How long until your mother in law calmed down from your talk?

Lola - posted on 11/16/2012

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Oh my goodness my now ex partners mother was like this all throughout my pregnancy with Audrina and throughout the entire time me and her dad was together! Infant Audrinaas now 6 months and she is still like that! I told her that I value her opinion ands that I think she is a great mother and her sons are wonderful but my parenting style is different and yes I'm going to make mistakes as I'm sure she did at one point but I'll learn from them and I'll find what works for me and Audrina so thank you for all your advice but she is my daughter and the depictions were mine and her dads to make.She didn't really take it to great but she did back off she got over it now and she is about 95% less over bearing! She has her moments but I think it helped also when she says I'm doing things wrong or I should do this and this I always say thanks but me and Audrina are going to do it this way and she is more than welcome to join but if she's going to be a negative nelly I'd rather her not! Be nice but firm,basically be like you respect her opinion but want to try it your way.If she doesn't back right off ask your husband to say something to her becuase she will probably listen more to her own son and respect his piece in it more so she knows it's not just you who doesn't like the over bearingness!!

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