Does it make me a hypocrite if I want to get my daughter christened but do not go to church?

Amie - posted on 06/26/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

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of course i believe in god, we used to go to church often and our entire family is christian but they also do not attend church. I do not go as iv always had to work and with study iv had asignments etc and now that i have a baby and its cold (she has a cold and its gone away and had to take her out for a birthday dinner and now its back- she is 11 weeks old) i was planning on waiting until she is a little older and immune system is stronger i guess. Also when i did go to church before i got pregnant they were always preeching how sex before marriage was wrong and one day there was a couple that were pregnant and were not married and the entire session was about how wrong it was of them but they will forgive them etc but do not approve and advise them to get married before baby is born. I was getting married and had the wedding paid for and all when i busted my ex with another lady (he is also christian and a strong believer in god) i was 15 weeks pregnant at the time and i dont hear from him at all. I am concerned i will be judged also. I will go back but im also trying to get my daughter into a routine and she has morning sleeps sometime between 8am and 12pm so if i take her to church im concerned she may cry all through. so whilst she is so young i think its best to wait.

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Enid - posted on 06/27/2010

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I have my son Christened and I don't go to church but I have a strong spiritual faith and believe in God so I want my son to have the choice and to be understand mum when he is older. Going to church does not you are a better person. You can have faith and live with concience without going to church.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/27/2010

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WOW! There is a long lecture of "I'm wholier than thou" On your page, please don't let this ruin all the other good comments in here. First of all, It is all a matter of principal. I am a "catholic", but I disagree with many of the teachings. That just makes me human, and not a brainwashed christain.

For those of you that are not Catholic, baptizing an infant is part of the culture, and yes...Catholosism is a culture. If you are going to raise your children Catholic, they also attend sunday school to have them receive there First Communion, and they re-affirm their faith by being Confirmed at about 14 years of age. In the Churches eyes, this is when a child becomes an adult concerning faith and can make their own decision about being a Catholic. If they want to, they are essentially re-baptized at this point, by making their own decisions....after still studying the faith.

Now, I am NOT a die hard Catholic, but truthfully, going to any other church just doesn't feel like church to me. But I deffinately would recommend finding another church for you to go to, becouse they are way to judgemental where you are at now. I do not know what faith you are, but by you wanting to baptize an infant, I can only assume you are Catholic. I baptized my son when he was 5 months old. He is now 4. I have an 11 week old that I would like to baptize in the next 2 months. We do not attend church on any sort of regular basis. If you are a hypocrit, well we are in it together then.

My faith has many flaws, all of them do. All that matters is that that you believe in God (if you want to that is) and how you treat your family. Life is hard, and life is busy. If you want to attend church, you will find a way. Please do not let others pressure you to do what you do not want. Baptize your child, it makes me feel good that I did, and am going to. Do what is best for you and your seet baby.

Tsema - posted on 06/26/2010

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hello amie, it doesn't make you a hypocrite at all, God's word says there is no condemnation to them in Christ, it means that God never condemns you, He just wants you to come to Him. Anytime is fine, i am not catholic but i a am true believer in Jesus and i know the most impt thing is to bring your children before God anytime and dedicate her to him. God sees your heart and He loves you.Regarding going to church you cld watch Christian tv when ur schedule is to tight ti make it. take care.

Xiomara - posted on 06/27/2010

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It doesn't make you a hypocrite. But I'd suggest finding a different church where you'd feel less judged. Believe me, I understand because I was raised in church and also would like to christen my son as a way of saying that he is dedicated to God, but I don't necessarily believe in going to church.

Renae - posted on 06/27/2010

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I know LOTS of people who get their babies baptised or chistened so that they can go to a private school. I personally dont have a problem with it, but I am not religious. :)

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Amie - posted on 06/27/2010

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thankyou all so much. so much different advise which has been very helpful and encouraging. Thankyou everyone for giving your time in responding to my question it was very much appreciated xox

[deleted account]

You are not a hypocrite. In my church and my beliefs, christening a baby is about celebrating God's love for the child. God accepts the baby in His love, later we have a Profession of Faith where the child accepts God's love and affirms their faith in Christ.

Our church would also never judge you for your circumstance. Sure, they would prefer that you were married, but what church wouldn't, lol. Go ahead and christen her, if the church will let you. God loves you no matter what you do in your life, so long as you have faith in Jesus.

[deleted account]

K - kinda confused as to why you want your child christened?
The Bible doesn't actually say anything about children being christened either.... it does say something about those who believe in Jesus being baptised - but that would be a 'believers baptism' ie for those that have made their own choice to follow Jesus (not applicable for your baby, but those old enough to make their own decision!)

If you are wanting to go to Church and maybe look a bit harder at the Christian faith, have you looked at local Alpha courses? (Google it!)

You mentioned about your baby and sleep. Do you stay indoors every morning during those times or sometimes go out? Does your baby ever sleep in her pram?
My baby generally sleeps in the morning, and Church can be a pain in that regard, but I am also committed and feel one day in the week isn't gonna be too much of a hardship, and it's a way to express my love and devotion to God amongst other like-minded people.

The bible does say sex before marriage is wrong, and for a whole lot of good reasons. There should be teaching on it, but I really hope that it wasn't totally aimed at one couple in particular. I wouldn't like my 'sins' put out there for everyone else. However what's done is done and there is forgiveness. What is more important is now you know this information is it gonna change your future? Will it change the way you live your life. You say you are a Christian but what does that mean? God isn't someone to be mocked or messed around with. God essentially gave us 10 commandments to live by - for our good. He is all loving, kind, gracious and forgiving. However if one of my kids keeps being disobedient, I discipline him! God as a loving father is no different (well except that he is far more patient, just and all together perfect!)
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, just as standing in a garage doesn't make you a car, but your car ain't getting off the forecourt if you don't put petrol in it and your Christian life ain't going anywhere if you keep it all indoors!
What would be good as a 'Christian' is to develop your life and walk with God. Build the relationship with Him. This is best done not only at home but finding a good Bible you can read, but also in the context of a local Church. There is usually more than one, so you might like to have a look around and see what kind of Church suits you. There is no perfect Church, but hopefully should be supportive with strong emphasis of teaching from the Bible and community outreach to name a few things.

Rebecca - posted on 06/27/2010

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Well look at my situation and guess who would be the bigger hypocrite?

I don't believe in god although I was raised to. I don't go to church. I'm not christened myself. I'm getting my son christened because it will be easier to get him into a good catholic school. Although I think it's a good thing for him to learn religion and Christianity.

I don't think of myself as a hypocrite but others may do. I don't really care what they think and I don't think you should either.

Angie - posted on 06/26/2010

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Sometimes when we go to church our pastor speaks the truth. It's not easy to hear but it's necessary for the salvation of our soul. Don't allow a pastor to keep you away from your time in church with God. He only asks for an hour a week, it's not much all things considered. I think it's wonderful that you are planning to christen you daughter. She's old enough to go to church, if she's old enough to go to daycare, Walmart, restaurants, etc - that's up to you. Don't worry about her crying in church. I honestly believe that it's the only way a baby can praise God. If you want her to be a christian in her adult life, you have to start now. My children were in church their first Sunday home from the hospital and have only missed church if they were vomiting or had a fever. It was important for us for our children to have a relationship with God and we have done our best to nurture and encourage that.

Sherri - posted on 06/26/2010

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If she is Catholic they do it as infants there is no problem introducing them to a religion and raising them in the faith of the parents and allowing them to choose when they are older. I actually have never heard of a catholic person being christened as an adult.

[deleted account]

My personal feeling is to let your child express interest in religion as the years go by and a desire to be christened when she wants to be. There's really no point to the big show & dance to get the baby christened if you don't plan to raise your child within the church. JMO though.

Sherri - posted on 06/26/2010

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My church did not judge my husband and I when we had our son before marriage and that was back in 1997. No I don't think it makes you a hypocrite either.

Amy - posted on 06/26/2010

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We christened our son but don't go to church, mostly because of our crazy work schedules I have to work a lot of Saturdays/Sundays. However now that he is 4 he is starting to ask a lot of questions about God so we're probably going to start going when possible because I don't know how to answer some of the ?'s he asks. We have a 3 month old daughter who we will also be christening.

Amie - posted on 06/26/2010

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of course i believe in god, we used to go to church often and our entire family is christian but they also do not attend church. I do not go as iv always had to work and with study iv had asignments etc and now that i have a baby and its cold (she has a cold and its gone away and had to take her out for a birthday dinner and now its back- she is 11 weeks old) i was planning on waiting until she is a little older and immune system is stronger i guess. Also when i did go to church before i got pregnant they were always preeching how sex before marriage was wrong and one day there was a couple that were pregnant and were not married and the entire session was about how wrong it was of them but they will forgive them etc but do not approve and advise them to get married before baby is born. I was getting married and had the wedding paid for and all when i busted my ex with another lady (he is also christian and a strong believer in god) i was 15 weeks pregnant at the time and i dont hear from him at all. I am concerned i will be judged also. I will go back but im also trying to get my daughter into a routine and she has morning sleeps sometime between 8am and 12pm so if i take her to church im concerned she may cry all through. so whilst she is so young i think its best to wait.

[deleted account]

No, but it might make you a hypocrite...

I guess it depends on WHY you want to get her christened. What purpose would it serve to you if you don't go to church? Do you believe in God and just don't have the time (or some other reasoning) for church attendance?

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