facing challenges with potty training

Courtney - posted on 10/21/2009

Quoting Tamryn :

My son will be 4 in December and still will not poo in the toilet, he uses a nappy and refuses to poo in the toilet. He has been peeing in the toilet since he was 2 years old but just wont poo.... it is beginning to irratate my fiance and i as he will be 4 and everyone says dont push him but what else can i do ??? Please any suggestions ??

I had the same problem with my son who just turned 4.  I ended up just telling him he was going to have to go back into diapers like a baby if he pooped in his pants again and the mere threat of diapers, along with a sticker reward chart, solved the problem.  i would never actually put him back in diapers, but the threat certainly works! :) good luck! sometimes it's nice to know you're not the only one going through this frustrating phase!

Tsema - posted on 10/21/2009

thanks you all, your advice helped

Deborah - posted on 10/20/2009

if you want him to potty train and he refuses to do it and ends up just doin it in his pants leave him for a rew minutes untill he is feelin very uncomfortable and if you do this for a few days he may give up and go in th toilet and realise its not uncomfortable anymore and get used to going and before you know it he will be doing it on his own.

Carol - posted on 10/20/2009

The key is age appropriate. He is old enough to understand. For my oldest he resisted pooping as well. Whenever we were home he was in underwear all the time. We had plain white uderwear and he wanted cartoon underwear. We let him pick out what he wanted but he couldn't get the special underwear unless he used the toillet the whole day. We also came up with a reward that if he went a whole week dad and I would take him alone to a special place for the day, his choice. One other thing we did was he really wanted a real baseball mitt. We got one and put that on top of the fridge where he could see it but not reach it. When he had dry time he got to have it as long as he stayed dry. As soon as he had an accident it went back on the fridge. It took a couple of weeks but it finally worked. He is now 23 years old and hasn't had an accident in over 20 years. His two younger brothers were easier to train and went diaper free at 2 years and at 18 months respectively.

Tamryn - posted on 10/19/2009

My son will be 4 in December and still will not poo in the toilet, he uses a nappy and refuses to poo in the toilet. He has been peeing in the toilet since he was 2 years old but just wont poo.... it is beginning to irratate my fiance and i as he will be 4 and everyone says dont push him but what else can i do ??? Please any suggestions ??

LAKREESHA - posted on 10/18/2009

I would suggest as soon as he gets up in the morning put him on the pot. and then repeat that every 2 hours. most boys learn things within a three day span. if you can get through the first day, then day 2 and 3 will be a breeze. the key is to be patient and persistant. and with boys it maybe he does like his potty and wants to use the actual toilet. my son was like that he wanted to use what everyone else was using. so i first started off with getting the like potty seat that sits on the toilet and from there things were good.

Alicia - posted on 10/18/2009

Every child is different, and does things at different ages, my first was potty trained at 26 months (now almost 6 and has never had an accident), and my second is currently training and he is 22 months and doing well. I did not push my boys, I just followed their lead, so I am not sure of any advice I can give other than follow his lead. I would not suggest pushing or forcing him, as my mom did that to me and I had bed wetting problems till I was 5yr.

Rebecca - posted on 10/18/2009

He is NOT too young. Don't skip the potty chair as he IS too little for the toilet and you want him to learn to take himself eventually. I gradually started training my first born boy at 13 months and within a month was going on the potty. The key for us was that everytime he went I would get really excited and praise him tons. I didn't pressure him at all and I didn't bribe him either, not one bit. He was just super excited that I was praising him. He was nearly potty trained at 19 months, but then I too, had another baby. I couldn't continue with the potty training due to being largely pregnant and then having a newborn, so when he was 2yrs. and 1month old I finally started again and within the month he was trained. We only had 2 weeks of having accidents, and then he was completely done with diapers. The baby boy I had just had I started training when he was 5 months old, I just started taking him in the morning and he would automatically go pee. I would also take him after breakfast and he would go pee and poop. He was going in the potty most of the day and I rarely had to change a poopy diaper all the way until he was 12 months old. Then he came down with a really bad flu bug or something and he was having diarreah for a week, so potty training had to halt and we had to start at square one. Now he is 21 months old and he just yesterday ran into the bathroom, sat himself down on the little potty and went pee then dumped it into the toilet all by himself!

So, my advice is continue taking him to the potty, use a little potty, praise him for even trying, read him stories about going potty. Also, let him go naked some of the time and then if/when he starts to pee on the floor pick him up and rush him to the potty. I did a lot of that at first until they figured out they could hold it. He WILL start telling you he needs to go, even if he doesn't use words. My 21 month old pats his diaper to tell me. Hope that helps!

Beth - posted on 10/16/2009

he is too young, if he isnt showing intrest and you push him he will just take longer than he should

Kathy - posted on 10/16/2009

take him to the toilet,skip the potty chair,get the seat that sits on the toilet,let him be a big boy,and tell him he needs to save the diapers for his new baby,another that worked with my kids and grandkids is a sticker chart in the bathroom,1 sticker for pee,and two for poo,good luck

Carol - posted on 10/16/2009

Chances are if you potty train him now he will regress when the new baby gets here. Boys tend to take longer although I have 3 boys the younger ones trained quicker than the first because they had someone to watch. Honestly don't get stressed out over it, it's not a contest. Enjoy the time you have now and make it a game. If he's not ready though he's not ready and forcing the issue will just make it worse. Try putting candy, like m&m in a clear jar out of reach in the bathroom. when he goes he gets some. I think part of the problem too is that diapers these days keep them dry so they don't get the whole uncomfortable wet thing. See if you can find training underwear. The ones we had were white with extra padding in the crotch, try Sears. When they wet them they felt the wet. Have him wear them at home during the day. You can also buy the cartoon undies but those have to be the "Special" ones that he can wear when he doesn't wet. Good Luck.

Laura - posted on 10/16/2009

My son was about 2 1/2 when he was potty trained. For pee, I would put cheerios in the potty and have him aim for them..it made it more fun...For pooping..sheesh..that was some work and I really don't have much advise for it...The thing for him was getting to wear big boy underwear.....

Jennifer - posted on 10/16/2009

Potty training is a hot topic with most moms ... but I'll go out on a limb here. I have 2 teenaged sons that, yes...are potty trained! All kidding aside, having potty trained a girl (friend's daughter) and my sons I can tell you that none of them were trained before they were 2.1/2 years old. The boys took a little longer to poop. My advice? Keep him interested, keep offering but unless he's telling you (either verbally or by handing you a diaper) that he's wet, he's not ready yet. You will just drive yourself nuts trying to force it. I know you probably wanted to hear some super secret potty training tip but there really aren't any. What works for one - may not work for another. One son got a matchbox car for peeing in the potty ... the other one was into something else. My nieces? Bought them Disney princess undies and they were done!



If you know he's going to pee/poop 20 minutes after drinking/eating - 15 minutes after he drinks or eats, put him on the potty and read to him.



Don't despair - they all eventually do it. The more you fight him, the more he'll fight you. It should never become a screaming, crying, hair pulling experience. Good luck!