family locker rooms at the gym

Nicole - posted on 02/13/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I take my son to the YMCA and we use the family locker room to change to go swimming. There are 5 locker rooms at the Y: one for men, one for women, one for boys, one for girls, and the family one. The family one is meant to be for parents with young kids and disabled people, as it has the wheelchair accessible shower stalls. The other day we went there, there was a lady in there with her 3 year old twin boys and 15 year old daughter. I was in there with my 14 month old son. We had all just gotten out of the pool and were changing. This lady was in my way, so I went to the other side to get my son dressed and when I looked up to see if she was almost done, she was in the process of getting dressed, but she was in a thong and topless! I understand it's a locker room, but it's a FAMILY locker room, there are MEN and CHILDREN there! There were no men there at the time, and the only children there were hers and mine, but still. What if my husband had been with me? Or what if I had an older boy that was disabled that I was helping? What if a man had decided to walk around naked in there with her teenage daughter in there? There's nothing wrong with being naked in front of your own kids I guess, I change in front of my son, but that will stop when he's older enough to realize the difference between boys and girls. I think adults shouldn't change in the open like that in family locker rooms, they're too public. The stalls are more than big enough for her and her 2 boys to go in so she can change. I wasn't really offended or anything, I just think it's a little awkward, especially if a man had come in. And I have been in there with men before, they were with their wives or helping a disabled person. What do y'all think?

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Janet - posted on 03/24/2013

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I really don't see what your concern is, Nicole. Another woman undressed in front of you, her own young kids (who are too young to understand nudity), her own daughter, and your son who is also too young to understand? With all due respect...so what? And then you begin throwing "what ifs?" about hypothetical situations that didn't and may not have happened. Why? You act as if some guy walked in and starting undressing in front of you and your son rather than another mother. So why are you posting here again?? Do you want us to make you feel better about YOU feeling awkward in a situation where it isn't warranted? Look, take my advice: with all the actual things you should be concerned about while raising your kids, stop freaking out about these non-existent problems and move on.

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Giselle - posted on 07/17/2012

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I agree that she shouldn't be topless (in the USA). But here's another perspective as me and my husband both take our daughter into the family change room and often will wear thong swimsuit underneath our clothes just for the purpose of being able to change in the open if all the rooms are full. No one has ever said anything to either of us, often some women will approach and ask questions about our baby when we are both down to thongs. We put our swimsuits on overtop and never reveal any nudity. I hope people really aren't offended by small swimsuits or underwear. Topless here in Canada is allowed for women where ever a man can go topless, yet I will NEVER take up that opportunity!
I think if the person shows discretion and realizes there is no man currently there, then go for it quickly, but as for the thongs I think that is perfectly normal. We've all got butts, men and women.

Nicole - posted on 02/13/2010

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I don't know if her daughter got undressed or not, when we got there she was in jeans and a bra. She could've gone to the girl's locker room, but I guess she was helping her mom with her brothers. At the Y we have to use the family locker room if we're helping our children. If it's full we can use the children's locker room if we're assissting the same sex child, and no kids period in the adult locker rooms. My friend got scolded because she took her 7 month old daughter in there to change her because the family and girls locker rooms were full. And at the gym on base no children of the opposite sex over 6 are allowed in the locker rooms. They also have family locker rooms.

Crystal - posted on 02/13/2010

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I agree with you she should not be changing in there especially in a thong and topless. She could of got the small children dressed and left them with the teenage daughter. Now did the girl get undressed too? But there is a time when kids get too old to be in a family changing room. I kinda feel that way about the bathroom in public. I don't mind little boys in the womens room but once they get to 8,9,or 10 they need to go in the mens room. I have little boys who are 4 and 5 and I know how it is but moms need to get over the whole "I can't go in the mens room" thing because when I let my boys go in the mens room they go in and tell me if anyone is in there then I monitor who goes in and if they take to long I OPEN the mens room door and ask them if everything was ok and there have been times where i have been gone in mens room and there were men in there. They look but never say anything or even give me a funny look. So MOM's let go of the strings a little and give them space and get over Your own fear of the MEN's room because if your willing to drag your little men in the womens restroom then You should be able to go in the MEN's to help them.

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