Getting your child to sleep thru the night is actually pretty easy!

[deleted account] ( 25 moms have responded )

I have been a "sleep coach" --- believe it or not :) I've been paid to teach moms to get their kids to sleep well! I'm more concerned with babies and moms' well-being than with my bank acct., so here is the big secret:

Unless your baby is preemie or sickly (in which case, by ALL means,FOLLOW DR's ORDERS) DO: FEED Baby at 6am, 10am, 2pm, 6 pm, 10 pm and NOT 2AM. Or, 7am, 11am, 3pm, 7pm,11pm and NOT 3AM. Either way, DO NOT ALLOW them to eat 1 drop except at those times 6,10,2,6,10 or 7,11,3,7,11. Period. They may have all the water they want. (They won't want very much if any, but it will make you feel better knowing they aren't dehydrated.) Sounds crazy but read on, please.

You will find within 10 days or possibly fewer, that your baby is the happiest baby in the county. This is simply because suddenly he isn't getting small snacks here and there, small naps here and there and then more small snacks here and there throughout the day/night. That can be confusing to Baby and to the digestive system and everything else. It is also HARD on Mom--nursing mom or not. He is getting a "large" meal every 4 hours, like clockwork, so guess what? His tummy digests like clockwork and his "timer" for sleep/play/eat gets set, like clockwork. ALSO, your um, boobs get set like clockwork!

I was basically the human pacifier for my firstborn for 6 weeks; going crazy, rarely slept, hardly ever even got dressed! Then I went to Dr. Denmark (who is 117 years old and on whose grave I will DANCE! :) She asked me how I was feeding the baby. I answered "Why, on DEMAND like all the books say!", thinking it was a foolish question. She very emphatically said, and I'll never forget it---, "DEMAND FEEDING MAKES FOR A DEMANDING BABY!"-- It was before Dr. Phil and, "How's THAT working for ya?" She was right. I went home; tried it, had a few good nights then a couple of terrible ones (crying like mad, ---both of us!) but then on Day 10 (hear the angel chorus?!) she slept from 12 to almost 7 am!!!!! 7 HOURS, which was nothing short of miraculous! For the previous 6 weeks, it had been a great night if I got 3 & 1/2 or 4!

From that day on, she rarely cried at all. It was night and day---no pun intended--- and she was SO happy! My boobs filled to capacity at 7, 11, 3, 7 and 11, every day, very noticable--just like Dolly Parton! There was a MEAL in there! Baby was getting meals rather than snacks. The mirror and bra told the tale and so did Babies' attitude. Another benefit was no more gas to speak of, unless I had beans or tons of acid like Orange juice and coke, etc.

Dr. Denmark's theory is that all those tiny doses of milk don't work thru if they don't get digested before another trickle or another larger snack comes down the gullet. They sort of ferment before they go on, and they blend with the new dose of milk. I believe it all. Everyone really saw the difference. I trained my baby (and my boobs) in 10 days. THANK YOU DR. LEILA DAUGHTRY-DENMARK! I love you!

I am not trying to get anyone's $$. Notice I didnt put a phone # nor any advertisemant whatsoever. I am not out to help ME. All of my kids are grown slept thru the night within 2 wks, afetr the 1st, who slept thru after 6, no thanks to anything I was doing! :) Really, Mom's, I just wrote it because it helped me and it helped my kids sooooooo much. They were very content and happy and rarely cried. They cooed and grinned most of the time, in fact. I firmly believe the reason is the schedule. It's one of those things that's sounds whack-o but the proof is in the pudding. If what you are doing is working, though, GO for it! If you are having trouble, prayerfully consider this or you may want to try BABYWISE books. They aren't quite so stringent in their scheduling. I for one, see "freedom", while nearly always WONDERFUL, can sometimes lead to a whole other kind of bondage. WAIT, easily freaked out people, PAUSE. Read carefully: What I mean is, sometimes, say in 3rd world countries, you see traffic as a free-for-all. Get there however you are able! No lights, no cops, no stop signs, any old vehicle ( or yak!) will suffice! But it leads to utter chaos. On the other hand, often times, some simple rules and structure, will lead to the opposite of chaos. Although we tend to think of RULES as binding our FREEDOM,

sometimes they actually give us our frredom. Traffic lights, stop signs and law enforcment serve you much better, in the end, than trying to drive around in a snarled free-for-all in an "anything goes, may the best man win" 3rd world country. That's all I'm saying about scheduling. And, as stated in the 1st paragraph, by alllllll means, if your baby is premie or sick in any way, PLEASE FOLLOW DRS. ORDERS or at least consult your physician. Happy zzzzzzzzz's.

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Renae - posted on 03/15/2011

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Ok, I too am a "sleep coach", though I dont use that term. But my job is to help babies sleep through the night. And I can only assume you are taking the p*ss and this isn't serious.



Wow, just, wow!



And just to clear something up for anyone ready this who might actually think you are serious...



The reason we are told not to put babies on their tummies has NOTHING to do with the morro reflex, or suffocation.



We are told to put babies to sleep on their back because research shows that when a baby is put on its tummy it can go into stage 4 "slow wave" sleep, which is a very deep sleep. In very deep sleep the baby's brain can occasionally completely shut down and the lower brain centres responsible for regulating the body and making us breathe can quite literally go to sleep. The older a baby gets the less of a risk this is, though there is no research that gives an exact age as to when tummy sleeping is safe. This research was released in 1998 and prior to that parents were instructed to sleep baby on tummy or side (depending on which decade you are talking about) because they slept better and woke less frequently. We now know that was due to a deeper sleep which is now linked to SIDS.



Clearing up some other things said by the OP:

Breast milk "refills" in around 40 minutes. You can feed a baby every hour and give it a full feed.

Most babies feed 3 hourly (when breast fed) because the calories they obtain from a feed lasts them 3 hours - its that simple.

At approximately 3, 6 and 12 weeks exclusively breastfed babies have a growth spurt and usually feed very frequently to boost mother's milk supply. Milk supply works on a supply and demand basis, you make as much as is being drunk in one feed. The baby feeds frequently to increase milk production so that there is more milk there for them after the growth spurt when their bodies will need more.

Most babies will reduce their night feeding on their own as their circadian rythms (basically your body clock) develop and they are physiologically able to go without food for longer stretches - usually once they have doubled their birth weight.



Katherine have you seen this yet? I'm a bit worried about people reading this post and taking it seriously. I guess Jodi or Krista you guys would have shut it down if it was breaking the rules. I think I'm just in shock that a sleep coach could be so uninformed of the physiology of babies or sleep research of the last decade. Clearly not properly qualifed.

Jodi - posted on 03/15/2011

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The following information is for anyone who is looking at taking the OP's much misguided advice:

"Breastfed babies do not need water - keep in mind that breastmilk is 88% water. Even in the first few days after birth, before mom's milk has "come in", colostrum is all that is needed to keep baby well hydrated (assuming baby is nursing effectively). Per the American Academy of Pediatrics, "Supplements (water, glucose water, formula, and other fluids) should not be given to breastfeeding newborn infants unless ordered by a physician when a medical indication exists... During the first 6 months of age, even in hot climates, water and juice are unnecessary for breastfed infants and may introduce contaminants or allergens."

For newborns (especially under 4-5 weeks), water supplements can be risky
•Babies under two months should not be given supplemental water.
•Water supplements are associated with increased bilirubin levels in jaundiced newborns.
•Too much water can lead to a serious condition called oral water intoxication.
•Water supplements fill baby up without adding calories, so water supplements can result in weight loss (or insufficient weight gain) for the baby.
•Babies who get water supplements are less interested in nursing. If baby is not nursing as often as he should, it will take longer for mom's milk to come in and can delay or prevent mom from establishing an optimum milk supply.

For babies past the newborn stage
•Too much water can interfere with breastfeeding because it fills baby up so that he nurses less. Babies need the nutrition and calories in breastmilk to grow - water has none of these.
•Breastmilk has all the water your baby needs, even in very hot weather.
•When your 4-6 month old baby is learning to use a cup, giving him a few sips of water a couple of times a day (no more than 2 ounces per 24 hours) is fine and fun.
•Once baby starts solids, you might want to give him a few sips of expressed milk or water with his solids - some babies need this to prevent constipation. "

http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids...

Johnny - posted on 03/15/2011

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Your recommendations are dangerous. All major pediatric organizations contradict your advice. If I had followed what you are suggesting, my daughter would have starved to death.

I sincerely hope that no one is paying you for these dangerous and ridiculous suggestions. I doubt any mother would be willing to sacrifice her baby's life or health to get a bit of extra sleep, no matter how tired.

None of this woman's ludicrous commentary should ever be attempted before speaking to your pediatrician first!!!

Jodi - posted on 03/14/2011

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I'm sorry, you are advocating "They may have all the water they want."?? A breastfeeding newborn?? Really?



You are also advocating sleeping on the tummy?? Despite SIDS research?



And if the baby does wake hungry at night, what do you suggest? Let it cry? A newborn?

Jaime - posted on 03/15/2011

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What troubles me about the OP, besides the dangerous advice, is the fact that you don't seem at all concerned with the well-being of babies, but rather, tailoring their sleep/wake schedules to that of something the parents are already used to. We like to get our 8 hours of sleep...but we are adults. When we have children, it goes without saying that we have to realize there are going to be some adjustments and inconveniences. I won't say sacrifice, because I don't think we ever have to truly sacrifice ourselves for parenthood. It's a bit silly to suggest that we begin sleep-training our newborns so that we don't end up with 'demanding babies', because there is a plethora of medical research and information that clearly states the facts about newborns/babies and their typical sleep/eat patterns. I think we can ALL agree that sleep deprivation sucks balls, but it's one of those adjustments that we HAVE to be open to if we plan on having a family or expanding our family. It's not something that we can tailor to our schedule as if it's just a quick lunch with friends in between meetings on a Wednesday afternoon.



I didn't breastfeed my son, but I certainly didn't deny him food in the middle of the night because my adult logic suggested that he can suck it up and wait until 7am when I'm good and ready to feed him...after I've had my 8 hours. I can appreciate that in this day and age, we are always trying to make life more convenient (technology proves that many times over). But, I think there are still some life experiences that can't be manipulated and made easier. There's a reason that parenthood is the hardest job in the universe, and I like to think that the struggles and smiles are all part of a bigger plan. I don't think that parents need to learn to sleep train in order to survive the first weeks/months of a new baby...they need support, whether that be through friends, family or information.

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Liz - posted on 01/30/2013

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Jessica, if you're new to this board, I suggest that you note the following two things:

1) Be nice to people. That means not telling other people to 'shut up'. If you disagree, you can still state this without being belligerent about it.

2) Don't bump up old threads from years ago. Invariably, when this is noticed by a moderator it will be locked. Any forum you care to mention has similar rules. If a conversation is done, it's done.

Dove - posted on 01/30/2013

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I'm only here because you bumped up at 2 year old thread from who the heck knows where all the way up to the front page.... I didn't go looking for some thread just to blast people. I simply responded to what you bumped up. Everyone you are slamming for slamming this method quit posting on this thread 2 years ago.

Jessica - posted on 01/30/2013

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Thank you for your concern in the issue Dove.

I know this post is 2 years old, but you're here, too, aren't you? I've been researching the Dr. Denmark method for a year now and there's not a lot of blogs/posts/websites about it so it brought me here and I just get really fed up with people saying "how dangerous" it is or "shame on you". If the baby is HEALTHY and HAPPY like I said, then who are you, or anyone else, to criticize them? Moms who have used this method swear by it. Also if you knew a thing or two about the moms who practice this you would know a lot of moms bend the rules. Some moms push feedings to 3 hours and implement a "dream feed" in the middle of the night. Dr. Denmark just laid out her thoughts, what moms choose to do is up to them. I don't follow everything she says.. a lot of it is outdated. But the sleep and feed schedules seem to be extremely successful across the board. And you're right, some babies won't thrive on it.. but most do. Her tummy sleep has also been outrageously successful across the board. But I'm sick of people butting in on how parents choose to rear their children. If the baby is thriving, what's it to you? You don't see moms who schedule their babies go on blogs about attachment parenting and demand feeding telling them they're wrong. Some people work better when their family is on a schedule, and you will not see one Denmark mom who complains about not getting any sleep or not having a happy baby. Also all babies are where they should be at their check ups… so tell me how doing this is wrong if it WORKS? People need to get their panties out of a wad.. or better yet get some sleep, but they never will letting their baby dictate the house hold regime. But if that works for you and your family, who am I to stop you?

Dove - posted on 01/30/2013

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Um... Jessica... this post is almost 2 years old, so you're a little late to the game... and apparently this is the first thing you've ever responded to, so maybe you should take your own advice about shutting up. ;)

Feeding every 4 hours at the beginning is ridiculous... even Babywise starts at a 2.5-3 hour schedule. I have 2 that were schedule fed and one that nursed 10-20 times every 24 hours. They all slept through the night when THEY were ready to do so without me having to do a thing. Some babies do thrive on a schedule and others would die on one....

Jessica - posted on 01/30/2013

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The Dr. Denmark method has been proven to work for those who have tried it. I have read many success stories and guess what? Babies are HEALTHY and HAPPY and parents are getting much needed rest. If this was dangerous to baby would parents be doing it? No, so shut up and stop being jealous b/c you wake up every 2 hours. Do what works best for you and your family, but there is no need to criticize those that choose this method.. because it works and the babies are PERFECTLY FINE!

Stifler's - posted on 03/18/2011

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Hilarious. A 7 week old going 4 hours without a breastfeed. That'll be the day.

Fairyfreak - posted on 03/17/2011

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How do you get a toddler to sleep through the night who never learned to sleep well in infancy? This is my problem.

Jodi - posted on 03/15/2011

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"Katherine have you seen this yet? I'm a bit worried about people reading this post and taking it seriously. I guess Jodi or Krista you guys would have shut it down if it was breaking the rules."

Unfortunately shitty advice isn't against the rules (if it was, we'd probably delete a lot more, LOL). But we just have faith that our members are helpful enough to totally refute poor advice, and hope that members will read the replies.

Renae - posted on 03/15/2011

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Just so everyone is clear -



the great majority of babies, over 75%, will sleep through the night after 12-14 weeks old as they become both developmentally and physiologically ready, regardless of how they are put to sleep, when they feed, or what the parents do and will never need any sort of "sleep training" or other assistance.



I'm still wondering if the OP is just taking us all for a laugh, this cant be serious, and she cant really be a sleep coach, surely!

Amanda - posted on 03/15/2011

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I also think your advice should not be taken seriously! Hopefully people reading it are getting a second opinion from a REAL professional. What a joke.
I have a 5 month old and NEVER deprived him of milk or even thought or trying to sleep train him. We simply have a routine that we follow and he eats, naps and has his bath at the same time every day. I didnt mind not sleeping through the night (I was lonely having to get up to pump anyways) so when he started sleeping through the night on his own at 2 months I was shocked! (It was on and off and he only recently started sleeping 10-12 hours straight) I do what I feel is right and it seems to be working perfectly! He is healthy and very Happy! Thats all a mom could ask for!

Heather - posted on 03/15/2011

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My 9 month old started sleeping 10-12 hours thru the night at 12 weeks. During the day he was eating every 2 hours (formula fed). All i did was establih a bed time routine where I id the same thing every night at the same times. It only took two weeks. He still sleeps 11-12 hrs a night. He now only eats 3 times a day with 1-2 snacks ( he eats solids) He no longer gets a bottle befor bed. ( he gave that up on his own at 6 1/2 months. i feel babies know what they need and some take longer to sleep thru. Yes I did some sleep training once I saw he could sleep thru the night but have NEVER refused to feed him just because it wasnt a certain time. Nor have i ever left him to cry it out for more then 5 min befor comfroting him. I think as a mom you need to do what you feel is right. I follow my babies cues and have from day one. I have a very happy healty baby. Listen to our gut and our baby.

Kate CP - posted on 03/15/2011

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Are you insane?! You don't sleep train a newborn baby and you don't put a baby to sleep on their tummy! My 6 week old son has just started sleeping through the night. They typically start sleeping longer at 6 weeks old. Genius.

Jaime - posted on 03/15/2011

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Also...I agree with the 'trust your gut' part. So many of us lack confidence in those first few months of having a new baby (despite prenatal classes and such). I think most of us have learned to trust our gut (along with the information) so that we can make the best, most informed choices for our families. Every family is different, so some babies might sleep longer in between feeds than others (my son went 4-5 hours inbetween in his first 4 weeks). Some families use AP style, some use 'babywise' and some use a variation of both...there is no 'right' way to do it all...we just do what works for us and gradually gain confidence in our decisions.

Krista - posted on 03/15/2011

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I agree with the others. This is very dangerous advice. Newborns have tiny stomachs and are not meant to go 8 hours straight without any nourishment at all. And they are DEFINITELY not meant to have all the water they want -- newborns are very susceptible to water intoxication, and it can kill them.

And you're recommending putting them on their tummy? Despite all of the research on SIDS? Call me crazy, but I'm thinking that a mild case of plagiocephaly is a little easier to deal with than a dead baby.

Sneaky - posted on 03/15/2011

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Is this typically what a troll does? Post obviously stupid and harmful information just for kicks???

Jodi - posted on 03/15/2011

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"One purpose of night wakings is for the baby to get nutrition. A newborn's stomach is very small -- about the size of his closed fist -- and can not hold a large volume of milk. Normal newborns will double their birth weight by about six months of age, an accomplishment that requires a very large intake of calories. Additionally, the composition of breastmilk promotes rapid digestion, usually occurring in about 90 minutes. This rapid digestion of breastmilk is not a mistake or a problem. It occurs to help ensure that the infant has frequent close contact with the mother and that he consumes a large amount of milk. Infants consume up to one-third of their daily calories during night feedings. So as you can see the nutritional value of night feedings are compelling even without considering other benefits."



http://www.ivillage.com/why-are-nursing-...

Sharon - posted on 03/14/2011

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LMAO!!! $$$ cha-ching$$$$ - all you desperate moms who are afraid to trust yourselves and professionals who paid tens of thousands for their educations.... BLING CHA CHING!!!

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