Jessica - posted on 02/06/2012 ( 128 moms have responded )
I'm 24 years old. Me and My boyfriend have been together now 4 years. I've been a caregiver for his biological child since we've been together. But I don't get credit for what I do, instead I'm downed by step child & the biological mother - who in my opinion isn't a mother she was just who gave birth to her and she's an occasional baby sitter. When my boyfriend and his ex wife got a divorce there was a court order that claims that the birth mother is to get the child every other weekend from Friday at 6 o'clock till Sunday at 6 o'clock. And you would think if you were a biological mother and you cared about your child you would do ANYTHING to spend those 6 days out of a month with your child. But no on Friday's when its the bio mothers turn to see her child she has her sister pick her up on Friday afternoon and she doesn't arrive to spend time with her child until sometime Saturday.... Then on Sunday by 2:00 o'clock the child is back at our home. But she's not brought home by the mother instead she's brought home by the aunt of the child. The child is starting to miss her mother and has said that she never gets alone time with her mother. She says that she is always having to spend time with her mother and someone else - and I see it hurts the child more and more in her eyes it's like her biological mother doesn't care for her. And that breaks my heart more than anything. The biological mother has said things to the extent that I'm childish? How am I childish when I'm the one that takes care of your child. Gives her the things that she needs etc. That just makes me ANGRY!
Anyway on to my dealing with the child. I'm pretty much the primary caretaker of the child. My boyfriend works 40 hours a week and gets home about 6:00 o'clock every night (In time for supper and about 30 minutes with his child before bedtime at 8:00 o'clock) I get child ready for school, fix her lunch, fix her breakfast, get her ready for school, do homework with her, bathe her, take her to and from school, fix her supper, get her ready for bed. Basically without me, she wouldn't have anyone that does anything for her. Yes her father works and brings home the bacon so to say and everything else is left up to me. Doctors appointments, Teachers Conferences etc. And needless to say The Biological Mother has never even been to any of these. The child's teacher at school has NEVER seen the biological mother. Anywho me and my boyfriends child don't particularly get along. She doesn't follow directions, She can't remember anything so I'm constantly correcting the things that she does wrong. And she is the type of child that takes criticism as NEGATIVE and she always says that I'm Mean because I'm constantly having to remind her of things and keep her on track. She treats me like crap most of the time. When she gets home from school she comes home and goes in her room and never once talks to me until she wants something like a snack or going outside. She doesn't listen to the instructions I give her. She calls me SHE instead of by my name ALL THE TIME. It's just hectic around this house, and I feel like I'm drowning and there is no one here to save me. Boyfriend doesn't see the way she acts because like I said he's never really here until weekends then he gets a taste of what I constantly deal with through the week and he's frustrated... HELP? Need suggestion on what to do.