Having babies after 30:Yes or no?

Kolina - posted on 03/21/2011 ( 28 moms have responded )

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My husband and I are talking about the possibility of having another baby. He is 30 now and I am 27. He wants to wait until he is 33 and I am 30. I know the risks do increase for things like down syndrome, early labor, decreased fertility and placenta previa but my main concern is that at 22, when my son was born, I started contracting and dialating at 20 weeks. I am scared that I will have the same kind of issues. Also, as a disabled veteran, I have a number of physical issues, like arthritis in my hips and degeneration in my back. I wonder if any other mothers have health issues like mine and have had children after 30 and what their experiences have been. Please share! lol

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Nia - posted on 03/23/2011

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You would be considered a high risk any way and this will not be due to your age. It will be because of your health issues.But the good thing is that you know the issues you faced with your first child and your OB will just keep an eye on those issue. My sister in law experince early labor with her first child and when she had here second child her doctor know of her medical issue and the baby was perfectly health. The best thing is that you and your husband sit down with the doctor so you get all the facts and hopefully you will have a baby soo. And the age thing doesn't matter. I have 6 kids I had one in my early 20's and one at 33, 36 and a now 3 month old at 38. So you can do it!

Cookie - posted on 03/24/2011

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I had my first son at age 20,and my two daughters at age 30and 32,I have high blood pressure and a heart murmur,I only had difficulties with my first.I ended up with low iron and an infection after the birth.the two girls were like a walk in the park.I think being prepared and knowing what to look for matters.A doctor who is aware of your issues makes a big difference.

Christina - posted on 03/24/2011

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The chance of having a baby with problems decreasing with women who have already had a child. It is still something to be cautious about though, and you should probably speak to you doctor about what you are wanting to do...My mom had my little sister at 38(almost 39) and she was perfectly fine.

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I have a friend who has degenerative disc disorder, she had her 3rd and final son when she was 35 (she was in her early twenties for the first two). Her back caused loads of problems during her pregnancy - she was hospitalised from 6 months as she couldn't walk due to the pain she was in, she stayed in hospital for 2 months before they had no choice but to remove her son via a c-section (there was no way she could have delivered vaginally) as she was so physically ill with pain.

Although her son was only technically premature by a week (born at 36 weeks) he had problems with his lungs and spent 3 weeks in neo-natel before he could come home. Now he is 17 months old and is a healthy little boy, he does suffer asthma but so does his big brother so it is likely that it is a condition in the family.

On a more positive note my SIL has 3 children, she had two in her twenties and her third when she was 42. Her daughter (eldest) was premature (36 weeks) and was really poorly from it and spent time in neo-natel, her middle son was also born early (37 weeks) and was perfectly healthy, her youngest was born on his due date exactly and had no health issues at all either.

Personally in your stuation I would talk to your OBGYN and discuss the ramifications of waiting to TTC, I think because of your health issues it would be better to get pregnant sooner rather than later though.

Jenny - posted on 03/23/2011

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I had Katie when I was 31 and it was thankfuly a normal pregnacey, but let me tell you. If you work full time it is very hard to do. Most days are a blur and you worry all the time weather you are doing everything right. She is a good but stuborn child and has a magor independant sreak. She dose things when she is ready to do them. So I have my hands full. My husband works 16 hour days and is tired when he gets home. My opinion is to think very carefuly about the money and time issues that will come with a new baby and if you can work all that out, I say go for it. I am very tired, but extremley happy.

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Sue - posted on 03/25/2011

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Kolina, I had all 3 of my children through my 30s. I had my kids @ 32, 33, and 35. They are all very healthy, physically adept, and complete joys of my life. My guidance to you would be to discuss all these concerns directly with your practicioner. You have unique concerns. Certainly, age is not one of them, singularly. Do you exercise, participate in Physical Therapy, healthy otherwise? I am 40 now with my youngest about to turn 5. I wouldn't have it any other way! Best of luck to you and your husband....and to the impending brother, too!

Lauri - posted on 03/25/2011

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An OBGYN would be able to answer your questions. It has been a few years since you had your last child. The medical field is continually advancing and you may find they have more options to help you. I have a friend who delivered her first child at 27 weeks. He has many health problems due to his severe prematurity. With her next pregnancy they sewed her cervix shut and she was able to carry her little girl the full 40 weeks. Good luck to you!

BARBARA - posted on 03/24/2011

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AS FAR AS HEALTH ISSUES HAVE I NO IMPUT BUT I ADOPTED WHEN I WAS 40 AND IT WAS THE BEST TIME OF MY HUSBAND'S AND MY LIFE

~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/24/2011

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Every pregnancy is different. Also the Down Syndrome and other things starts to be a factor after 35. Just becouse you had dialating at 20 wks iwth the first, does not mean you will experience the same on the second.

Crystal - posted on 03/24/2011

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Kolina, if I'd let age stop me, I wouldn't have my beautiful 5-year-old daughter. I was almost 42 when I had her. I had my son at 35. They are both strong and healthy. I too was anxious about being an older mother but everything turned out great. Good luck to you.

Amanda - posted on 03/24/2011

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I am 33 years old and I am currently pregnant with my 4th child. I can tell you that pregnancy gets harder as you age. I don't have the medical conditions that you have, but even at age 30 you shouldn't be as concerned about things like down syndrome (which at the maternal age of 32 when the child comes to term is only 1 in every 725). Talk to your doctor about your risks and trust yourself to know what is best. The concern would be that with previous history of pre-term labor, that risk is still an issue, no matter what age. Out of curiosity, what makes your husband want to wait another 3 years to have a child? If you feel the time is right now, why wait and worry?

Tiffany - posted on 03/24/2011

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I believe there is no age to stop having babies. I believ e as long as your body can handle it, go for it. My mom had me and my brother when she was 18 and 20. Then no more untill she was 31. She had her 6th one at 39 and is now 41 and considering another. My aunt has the same back problem as you, and she had 3. She said it hurt a little as the babies got bigger but she said it was all worth it. and my opinion as far as dilation goes. Every pregnancy is diff. With my first, i was 18 and started dialating at 20 weeks as well, contractions started at 22 weeks and was back in foreth in the hospital for these problems. I ended up having to be induced with him because i never went into real labor. With my second i was 20 and everything went fine. I
never had contractions, never dialated, but ended up going into a dr appt at 36.6 weeks and was not dialated. I went back an hour later for my first contractions and was dialated to 4 cm and had my baby girl the next day. I never take how one pregnancy went in consideration when it comes to another. I see no problem with you having a baby after 30. And as far as the arthritis goes, my hips are crooked, and my hips tilt one way and my uterus tilts the other way, so i kinda know what you are going through cause the pain from my tilt is alot like an arthritis pain, and im sure you will be fine. Good Luck!!

Sara - posted on 03/24/2011

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I do not have health issues like you, but I had my first baby at 30 and I'm now having another baby at 33. Before 35 you're not considered in the high risk category merely due to your age.

Michele - posted on 03/24/2011

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i have had 5 children my first one i was 18, 21,35,27. then 35. my hardest pregnancies were my ones from my twenties. the one that was from age 25 came 4 weeks early, my last one was the easyist.dont worry take vit. and rest you will do fine

Susan - posted on 03/23/2011

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I have arthritis and know how painful it can be - however, there are measures you can take that will not only help your joints during pregnancy, but are natural and shouldn't hurt your baby. I would set up a consultation with your OB. Nobody will know better than a professional about your chances, risks and dangers, if any.

Kolina - posted on 03/23/2011

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Thank you Christy. That is more along the lines of the type of advice I was looking for. I actually have two heart murmurs and and asd as well. I think that is what will have to happen if we decide, I'm just going to have to be watched and probably on bed rest again.

Christy - posted on 03/22/2011

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I was 33 and 34 with my first 2 and only children. I have high blood pressure, type 1 diabetes, and a heart murmur. They are fine. I was watched closely by a dr throughout both pregnancies, BTW.

Jenni - posted on 03/22/2011

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I think that's more relating to women over 35. But yeah, if you have those conditions it'd be best to discuss it with your OBGYN.
I'm 29 and my husband is 33... we have 3 children right now. My SD (3.5 yrs) who we have every other weekend, my son (2.5 yrs) and my daughter 10 months. We are still undecided if we want another child, as in we haven't made any permanent decisions not to. *IF* and it's a big if... we decide to have another one it wont be until I'm around 32 or 33 years old, health premitting. I have my hands full with so many young ones already. ;)

Renae - posted on 03/22/2011

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Oh ok Kolina, sorry I did misunderstand what you were getting at. Sorry for assuming it was the age thing you were worrying about. :)

Kolina - posted on 03/22/2011

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I know that 30 is not old, and that is not what I am insinuating, my question was for anyone that has the same physical ailments as me or had early labor with a child in their 20's then conceived again in their 30's. I am worried about getting pregnant again and going into labor again at 20 weeks and having a very ill child. I'm not going into this with no history. I had some complications already.

Renae - posted on 03/22/2011

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Do you know that the average age for a FIRST time mother in Australia (not counting teen pregnancies to under 18's) is 30? It is very very common to not start having kids until your early 30's. I wasn't aware there were increased risks for over 30's, I thought it was normal, I was quite surprised you were questioning it. :)

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I agree with the other posters...30 isn't old. I know a few women who are 40+ and have recently had babies. I'm 30 and am pregnant with my second. I had my DD at 29. Like the previous poster said, you never know if you will encounter issues, as I did also, having 2 m/c before finally concieving my DD and another one in between her and this current baby. I wish I had of started earlier. Esp since my husband is 5 yrs older. If you already have arthritis and issues those are only going to get worse with time, so I would also say go ahead and have what babies you want now. 3-5 yrs is definitely going to make a physical difference in how you feel during your pregnancies.

Blackwood - posted on 03/21/2011

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I'm sorry but this question made me laugh, only becuz more and more woman are waiting till thier 30 to start a family. I was 31 with my son and having my second at 32. After 35 years old the risks are greater. At 30 you're fine.

Jodi - posted on 03/21/2011

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30 is still young, and the so called *risks* are hardly different to that of a 25 year old. Your fertility starts to decrease a little at 30, but the risks really don't kick in until after you are 25. 30 is considered pretty average, I can't see what you are concerned about.

I had my youngest when I was 36, no real complications, although she was born underweight, which possibly had something to do with my age. But she is a perfectly healthy young girl these days :)

Jen - posted on 03/21/2011

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my mom had me and my brother when she was 40 she had arthritis there was no time for a c section we were born normally with forceps but we was breech my brother came out fine i was left too long with out oxygen and have a few mental problems n physical problems. my mom was bleeding really bad so stayed in hosiptal for 6 weeks, me and my brother were taken into foster care for that time as my dad had my other siblings to look after my mom had six kids altogeather. my foster mom is stil going she has cared for over 60 children she is a lovely person and my mom is 61 now and i do get affraid as my mom isnt as young as my friends moms she has health issues these days but she does alot for me and i love her with all my heart i do wish she had us when she was younger but cant change it now and she is fab grandma to my 27 month old son.

Kolina - posted on 03/21/2011

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I have already set up an appointment with my OB for us to go talk to her. She delivered my son and knows all of my issues I had with him, so hopefully that will help.

Louise - posted on 03/21/2011

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I had two children in my early twenties and then at 35 i decided to have another baby. It took 3 years and 3 miscarrages to have my daughter as I had developed sticky blood as I got older and the hospitals here in the uk will not test you for it until you have had 3 miscarrages. So instead of being 35 I was 38 going in 39. If you want children and you already have medical conditions my advice would be not to wait. But you have to have the full backing of your partner. Sit down with him and express your concerns. If he is serious about having more children then surely he will consider the problems you had last time.

Saying that there are many mothers out there that have no problems at all having children later in life. maybe talking to a gyne will strengthen your case not to wait.

Theresa - posted on 03/21/2011

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I don't have any health issues, but I had 2 babies after 30. 35 is when they consider a woman "advanced maternal age". I was 21 when my first was born and 23 when my second was born. After years of trying we thought we couldn't have more, but then at age 33 I got pregnant with surprise #1. I was 34 when she was born, and surprise pregnancy #2 cam along 9 months later. They are 17 months apart, so I was 35 when he was born. Both children are healthy and just fine. I didn't have any issues with either pregnancy. Labor was no different either. The only thing I find harder is keeping up with them LOL. But that could also be because they're 1 and 2 1/2 now. My other 2 were 3 years apart. They are both very busy, but ofcourse I wouldn't change it for anything. Why does he want to wait so long before having more?

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