He got me pregnant on purpose without me knowing

Wendy - posted on 01/19/2010

Take him to court! I'm tired of women just sitting down and allowing men to get away scotch free as if women are able to procreate by themselves. It takes two to tango and therefore the two should bear equal responsibility. I don't care how deadbeat he appears to be, women have to grow up real fast when they have a baby whether or not they have support so I don't see why men shouldn't either. Take him to court, they'll take it directly from his pay if he won't give it voluntarily. On that note, if he can't spend time with the child or keep the baby for you when you need to run errands, let him pay the sitter fee. That's my opinion.

Toiresa - posted on 01/19/2010

I know exactly how you feel.... some guys are sneaky... my sons father actually took the condom off during inter course without me realizing it... well in my case u cant always tell in the dark, so it is possible to not know

Ashley - posted on 01/19/2010

If you chose to have sex with him, without taking the appropriate measures to ensure you would NOT get pregnant, (birth control pills, IUD, etc) and he refused to wear a condom, then you are EQUALLY responsible for the outcome.

Haley - posted on 01/19/2010

Sweet heart you knew you were having unprotected sex with him. So please tell me how it wasn't your fault. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. Your Judy as responsible as he is and now it's time to grow up and take care of your responsibilities. Stop blaming other people and complaining about your baby's father and focus on being a good mother.

Tara - posted on 01/19/2010

nothing me or anyone else says on here will make him be a better parent as some others have said u need to let him go one day he will realize what hes missing and he will have to deal with it that is no longer your prob. since you decided to keep the baby he is now your number one priority and even though you thought you would have a partner in this obviously you dont and now your mind set has to change to being a single parent if you keep holding on to this guy and his lack of parenting you wont be the best parent you can be

Bette - posted on 01/19/2010

Take the dead beat to court to make him help out with him.

Bette - posted on 01/19/2010

Take the dead beat to court to make him help out with him.

Melanie - posted on 01/19/2010

Wow. I'm sure you get it now, but I still can't believe how many people don't! If you aren't ready for the possibility of becoming a parent, you shouldn't be having sex! Period. Even WITH protection you can get pregnant. (and for those of you who think the pull out method is effective, pull your head out of the sand. There is STILL sperm coming out before the big O, which can then stay alive for up to 3 days) Vent over. :)



As for Eli's Dad. Yes, he's being unreasonable, selfish, and hypocritical. But there's nothing you can do that will change him. The decision to be a responsible adult is his alone, whether it's fair or not. I would recommend getting full legal custody, and court ordered child support for your son. I also wouldn't try and force his dad to have a relationship with him. I know you want the best for you son - including a relationship with his father, but the last thing he needs is a dad who's resentful of the time he has to spend with him. Perhaps let dad know about major events, but don't expect him to all the sudden want to become super involved - even if it's mediated through the courts. And whether or not your ex ever comes to his senses, try to make sure Eli has some male role models you love and trust. It's a heartbreaking situation, and for your son's sake, I really do wish you the best.

Lorraine - posted on 01/19/2010

The best thing you can give yourself is a baby...a person that will really love you for the rest of your life. XXX

Lorraine - posted on 01/19/2010

please do not force your beautiful baby on him, if he cannot cope he may hurt your baby out of frustration, keep Eli safe dear.

Stephanie - posted on 01/19/2010

some men are just like that. It's hard but gives you so much more of a reason to teach your child about healthy relationships so they don't experience the same hard times you have.n Just love your child and if his father wants nothing to do with him then fine.; But it's still his responsibility to help you financialy, seeing as he seemed to want this baby badly enough.

Samantha - posted on 01/19/2010

Its as simple as this. If you were not ready to have a kid you should have not been having sex. If you decided to have sex than you should have been practicing safe sex. whether you were ready to have a kid or not you now have one and this child should be your NUMBER ONE priority. If the father cannot stand up and help you then get rid of him and pay for childcare if you are not in a position where you yourself can stay home. You cannot force anyone to do anything they dont want to. Seek full custody of the child and care for the child or consider adoption if you feel you are not ready for a child.

Gina - posted on 01/19/2010

How can a guy force you to get pregnant, you must have had sex unprotected. Not saying that he is right for acting like a loser, but don't blame him for your mistakes

Dee - posted on 01/19/2010

Good words! Also if you leave him out, make sure your baby gets enough male influence of maybe your brothers or your dad as it is so flippin important for children!

Lattima - posted on 01/19/2010

Its hard forcing a man to take care of responsibilities that he has no intentions on takin carg care of! Post a rwhen a child is born to underage parents each of them go through a stage of growing up, but the way you had to mature was not the same way he matured. And since your baby does not live with him he knows that he can dismiss all responsibilities because the child is primarily in your care! So my answer to you is don't force him! When your son grows up he is going to know who played an essential role in him becoming a man and his father will regret it in the long run! Also, he might not want to be there physically but you can make him be there financially! Child support his ass! Since it was his choice 2 have him its only right he partake n takn care of him! He is not tryna make things easir for u so y should u make thng easier for him! Its a new year no more miss nice baby mom lol! Take charge!

Dee - posted on 01/19/2010

I agree too!

There are a lot of girl that provoke and the nmake up they were tricked but it sounds like she is genuinley gutted the father is behaving the way he is. It doesn't make sense really but he could be a control freak and now he knows she can't go out much because of the baby!

Mistie - posted on 01/19/2010

I see a lot of well meaning advice and some pretty judgmental advice. You know your responsibility in this situtaion. Ask a question, What would your life be like tomorrow with out your son? Next week? Next month? You can doing amazing things with your life even being a single mother. It will not be easy, but it will be rewarding. As to the father, you cannot make a person take responsibility if they do not want to. The best you can do is attempt to talk with the father and set boundaries and do so in an adult manner without attitude or assigning blame. Talk, if then he still does not step up, the you need to make the decsion best for your gift,your son. Because your son is a gift, you need to take care of his needs before your own. Again, not easy. We are selfish by nature. Legally go to the courts and get support,you may have to allow visitation. If you can prove neglect then that can put a stop to it.
Your son is going to be little for only a little time. Trust me, I just had my heart stopped by my 10 year old because he informed he has a girlfriend. Enjoy Eli, nurture him, and do your best by him. His father will have to account someday, Eli will ask him why he(father) chose to ignore him.
I hope this helps you and encourages you.

Natalie - posted on 01/19/2010

Well, i gotta get defensive right here. Now, i KNOW it's possible for a guy to get a woman pregnant on purpose. My mom had me and then my brother 5 years later.She was done but she had some problems with her high blood pressure so she couldn't take hormones which means no birth control etc.... and this was 15 years ago so they didn't have all the methods they have today ... They agreed to use a condom, she trusted my dad and he actually took a needle and put holes in the condoms they were using and that's how she got pregnant...

They did get divorced like a year later, my sister wasn't even 6 months old.



So... i'm not saying that's what happened here BUT it is possible, especially if you have an agreement with your partner AND are using protection.

OR some men do actually switch out birth control pills from the women with something that look like them...it's all possible

Dee - posted on 01/19/2010

Dump him, dad's are improtant to a baby but not one like this!

gET YASELF A GOOD MAN, stop thinking about yourself, your baby comes first .

The baby is worth it!

Good luck!

Get help if you can't cope!

Abby - posted on 01/19/2010

how did you get pregnant without you knowing???? if you didnt use protection then you should have known that you could get pregnant. common sense

Cheryl Bethmann - posted on 01/19/2010

It is a little late to be blaming anyone for the pregnancy don't you think? You need to move on. You obviously need to take matters in your own hands. Help is not coming from him so quit thinking it will. You shouldn't be going over there with a baby he has no interest in. Figure out what you need to do to make it work for yourself and your baby on your own....sorry this is life! Bottom line trust only yourself when it comes to serious matters like this!

Plama - posted on 01/19/2010

I believe the question here is about responsibility. Being a parent means being responsible. He's not responsible, so try not to force him to be a parent. Take care of your Eli and do the best to be a good-enough mom so that the child is happy and feels loved. Just be active and caring and don't expect too much from him - some men weren't made to be fathers. Find a daddy for your child and make a new family. Good luck!

Beth - posted on 01/19/2010

I hope you have the support of your family. Please please remember that Eli is not the problem (babies are a gift and thought this may sound mean - gifts can be given to someone that will love having them) find someone that can help you so that Eli never gets the butt end of the deal. Sometimes the mom and baby are better off without the dad being involved-I suggest you let dad go his own way and you make a life for you and your baby.

Chrishane - posted on 01/19/2010

i know lotsa moms who raised babies on their own, you can too, u dont need him in ur life, and besides when ur child is older, hi will also decide that. so carry on and take care of ur child urself.

Sandy - posted on 01/18/2010

I guess the part that I'm having the most trouble with is why would you WANT this man in yours and your child's life? It doesn't sound like he's nice to you or wants anything to do with the baby. I doubt very much that will change. If he's an ass now, he'll remain an ass in the future. So move on! Your responsibility now is to your baby and his welfare. If it were me, I would keep my child as far away from him as possible. He doesn't sound like he can be counted on to be responsible and your baby is just too precious. Good luck to you!!

Kayla - posted on 01/18/2010

Lori: I am a 19 year old mother, and getting ready to start nursing school in the fall. My boyfriend and I are NOT married, marriage isn't at the top of our list. You don't have to be married to know that you care for somebody and want to be with them. Alls you need is love, and trust. NO BANDS REQUIRED. For you to say that people shouldn't have sex outside of marriage I think you need to realize what year your in. Times have changed, things have changed. You need to accept that. Also if your real big on not having sex before marriage i'm assuming you are religious.... WELLLL the bible teaches you not to judge people. People make mistakes and it happens ACCEPT IT.



As for the rest of you people who have decided to ridicule her....

This circle of moms thing was created so that moms could talk and give advice to eachother. Helpful and honest advice. Yes, I know you are talling her the truth.. But try wording it in a different way. No she shouldn't only blame the man for the situation she is in, but can you imagine how overwhelmed you would be? I couldn't imagine not having my boyfriend in my. He is my rock, my protector. I'm thankful for him everyday.. But some people aren't that lucky.. So they look to other people for help, for advice, and for shoulders to lean on. We are all adults.. Handle things in the adult way.. In a mature, kind way... Do unto others as you want them to do unto you... Be kind and people will be kind back...



And as for you Darnisha.. I understand where you are right now.. My mom was in a relationship with a deadbeat and she got pregnant. He wasn't around through her pregnancy.. then occasionally he would come around to get her hopes up and then leave again. She had us (her family) there... Then Ethan came and he was one of the best things that had ever happened to us.. the man was still never around.. he is 5 1/2 years old and the man just decided to be a constant in his life, but Ethan doesn't need him, he doesn't expect him to be around he understands he is the happiest child i know. I haven't mentiond her has 3 other children with 3 other women.. and the 3 girl is a year older then me.. My point is even though this guy is a real piece of work you can't entirely blame him.. You are an adult and you are in charge of making your own decisions, which was having sex. And these are your consequences.. But the good part about the consequence you've recieved for your actions is one of the best gifts that you could've ever gotten.. You have someone who needs you as their rock, their protector, their supporter. And when you look down at that baby and he smiles the biggest grin at you, you know that this was what was ment for your life. That being a mother is one of the best and most enjoyable things... Just take things one day at a time, step by step and you will find your way.. Your a mother now your natural insticts will kick in :))



P.S. about needing someone to take care of your child for you look into daycare that will accept child care assistance... the government will cover most of the cost for you to have your child go to daycare.. That way you can go to school (if you wish) or get a job... You can get amazing degrees online or even within two years..

Katherine - posted on 01/18/2010

well that sounds like a pretty shitty place to be put in...but i have to say and it seems to be very true in this day and age that is it and option for most men wether they want to be dads or not, I have two kids with the same guy and if he see's them once a month thats pretty good he lives three hours away from me and i wont leave my kids alone with him cuz he's not really a good person, he wants me to but i won't because i can't trust him...so depending on what kinda of person your baby daddy is would depend on how much he should get to see the baby, and keep in mind when it comes to the daddy that being a parent is a privelage not a right! and he needs to earn the right to be a daddy! by being a good one. and one more thing, you say he doesnt hardly know how to make a bottle or change a daiper so i personally wouldnt be leavin that man alone wit any babies!

Dorothy - posted on 01/18/2010

that was my point there are alot of nice guys out there take your time and find a good one.youll be a lot happier.

Stormie - posted on 01/18/2010

First of all im agreeing with some of the ladies below...if you agreed to unprotected sex then the blame is on both of you...nobody can purposely get you pregnant without you knowing whats going on!!! I was 15 when i got pregnant with my first son & his dad is no longer in the picture...he has been in and out of jail and rehab since day one...but i GREW UP and stepped up to the plate and acted like a MOTHER!! You do not need a man to raise a child in any decency! I met my now boyfriend when my son was 2 he is now 4 and we welcomed a new babyboy in may and this man is a father to them both and its amazing to see the love my son has for him! Time is all it takes...be a woman and take care of your son...no matter if the man who got you pregnant is in the picture!

Dorothy - posted on 01/18/2010

the baby is here just concentrate on your baby . go back to school or get a job and look after your baby.it will be hard for your baby to grow up and feel secure. if you make him or her feel insecure.he isnt a dad he is just a sperm donor. and that doesnt make a good dad, you will find someone who will love you and your son and give you a good life but that takes 2 to make a good life

Julie - posted on 01/18/2010

It is not the baby's fault, that's the first thing to remember. I might be misunderstanding, but it sounds like there are things that you've been wanting to say to his father since learning that you were pregnant. Have you discussed these with him in a calm, rational setting? It sounds like you may need to just make some time to have an adult conversation with his father about his involvement in the child's life, and both of your expectations of the other. Praying it all gets worked out for you.

Susan - posted on 01/17/2010

I would not be leaving my son anywhere near him if he is telling you and showing you he has no interest. As an earlier post suggested financial support is probably the best you're going to get from this man. Easier said than done but for your own well being let him go and move on.

Ailysh-Hope - posted on 01/17/2010

This post, even though posted with honesty, opens up a window into the state of your heart. I encourage you before you do anything else, get help from a professional to work through some of your issues and feelings around this event. If your don't work through them then it will colour the rest of your life. And Eli needs a mum filled with positivity, not blame and bitterness. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!

Angelica - posted on 01/17/2010

if u werent ready for a child then u shouldve taken precautions. it takes 2 people to create another life. both of u are equally to blame. me and my boyfriend TRIED for our daughter and even tho he has done nothing to help me i dont regret one minute of it. time to grow up and do wat u need to for u and ur child ur not the first woman to go through this and most certainly wont be the last. it might be hard but in the end its always worth it. and to those that keep saying adoption just because the child doesnt have both parents doesnt mean she should give up her child. two parents doesnt mean a "better" life.

Tina - posted on 01/17/2010

You obviously are a very loving Mother who only wants the best for your sweet baby. I clearly recognize you want the baby to have a good father. So for it sounds as though Eli's biological father is not going to step up to be that. Thats ok, as long as you are able to get child support from him to care for this little angel. Dont think for a minute that you and the baby dont deserve that. You are worthy of Love from a good man who owns his choices and responsibities, if this guy is not one to do that then take him to court, get him to pay for this child he helped make, and move on with wisdom and with Hope that you will one day find a good man to be a father figure to you sweet baby boy. You are strong enough to do this alone and raise a strong and wonderful young man, dont let anyone tell you otherwise. You are a Mother, that is an incredible blessing, and God would not have blessed you so if he thought you were unbale to be wonderful at motherhood!bless you my fellow mother! be strong!

Sara - posted on 01/17/2010

Just trying to look for sympathy in the matter. Well youre not getting it from me. Im a single mom of a 6 year old son. I pretty much raise him on my own with out the help of anyone. I attend college and he has school all day and then after school club til I get out fo classes. My son's father NEVER sees him.. 3 times in the last almost 7 years he's seen my son. I left him because he was abusive and into drugs. He had to have an operation when he was little and the dr we went to said he couldn't have kids.. Well obviously he can. My son doesn't kno who he is and Im proud to keep it that way. He knows Im there for him and I dont have to worry about the lies, calls and false promises of his father saying he'll call or come visit and never follow through. I was 18 when I had my son. Three months pregnant when I graduated and Im not looking for sympathy like you are.. I finally found an awesome amazing man. He treats with as equal, opens doors for me etc and is great with my son. his mom accepts us as family and thats what we are. we're coming up on our 1 year anniversary on Monday the 18th. You need to think of your child first and relationships with men LAST. I did that and after 6 years I finally found a great amazing man that I love with all my heart

Shayla - posted on 01/17/2010

ok first off its both of u that choice not to use anything and there for u both wanted the baby in some way and i'm going threw this shit with my babies father where together but hes a retard when he says i wanted the babies and he didn't because we didn't use nothing for along time and i told him if it happens i'm keeping the baby he said ok cause he wanted it at first then he just told everyone he didn't want our son so its bullshit when people say that it honestly takes 2 to have sex so i don't see why people say shit like he forced me if he forced u it CALLED RAPE and by the looks of it reading this it don't look like he raped u so there for u both wanted ur baby u both need to take care of it i deal with the same shit from my man men never wanna take on there roles and watch there babies hell i have to fight with mine to change our son to and i don't know what to do about it ethier men take a long time to grow up thats the way it is and i'm not saying its right cause its not but i can;t seem to get mine to change if u can good luck

Latrise - posted on 01/17/2010

Some of you are just talking reckless to one of our own; a woman. A woman who feels she and her body were manipulated by a man who only cared about himself that night, obviously. On a more cheery note, momma don't stress so much abou his trifeling self cause you are not the person he has to explain his stupid actions to, it's lil Eli. Don't let what others think or even tell you deter you from what you already have, bleesings in disguise.





Ladies the circle of moms is here to encourage and help all mothers. This includes Ms. Newell. So instead of telling her what she already knows(that it takes 2) how about encouraging her to know that there aren't mistakes only solutions,and that she's not the first or last woman to ever go through something so horrible and that she's gonna be a great mommy and that everything is going to be fine.





KEEP YOUR HEAD UP MAMMA!!!! TAKE CARE OF THAT PRECIOUS BABY AND GOD WILL DO THE REST!!!

Jessica - posted on 01/17/2010

Wow! Hello Darnisha. You have a lot on your plate and a lot of good responses from everyone. In order to have healthy relationships, with your significant other and your baby, you need to take care of yourself first. That's what should have happened way before anybody, when it was just Darnisha alone. You can't rewind time back now, but it's wonderful at the same that you decided to embrace motherhood (despite at such a young age). Now that you have your little one, give him all the love that you would give yourself and more, be around only positive people in your life (the way you should've treated yourself before you delve into any relationships) that will inspire and uplift you and know that every little thing you expose your Eli to will affect him for the rest of his life. So make sure he only gets the best and good luck!

Susan - posted on 01/17/2010

I've been following the Prop 8 trial. All week, I'm hearing about how gay marriage and gay parenting is bad for society, bad for heterosexuals. I'm not sure why, it sounds like straight couples get themselves into enough trouble without the gays. As for parenting, Dad Savage says gay people don't get drunk one night, wake up the next morning with all this adoption paperwork laying around, saying "Uh oh, I think we're parents!"



Darnisha, you sound like a lovely woman. Eli is a beautiful and healthy little boy. Sounds like you are on your own with him. What I mean by on your own is: drop the drama like a bad habit, no more casual relationships, no more dating until you are emotionally and financially squared away, which may take YEARS.



You now have to have a spine of steel to raise Eli to be a real man. He needs your help to get an education, stay emotionally and physically healthy, learn to be a stand up guy.



Stop being a victim of circumstance. Be the mama bear I know you are.



Good luck, I'm cheering for you.

Claire - posted on 01/17/2010

You say your boy's daddy wants to be involved, and he says he wants to be involved, but all evidence points to the opposite. You need to tell him what you need from him. Ask him if he wants to be a part of his son's life. And then ask him, quite specifically, is he prepared to 'change nappies every x hours?' 'sterilise bottles?' 'make up formula?' 'feed the baby?' 'soothe him if he cries for 2 hours constantly?' 'entertain him?' 'help pay for his expenses?' 'take the initiative, and come and visit more often than once a fortnight?' etc.

Tell him that you will give him a chance, and he needs to follow all these commitments in being a Dad, and if he doesn't, you will need to remove your son from his neglect and mis-care, and he will not be able to see him anymore, as it will cause your son emotional problems growing up. I know there are legal things with this statement, but you need to decide, is your son important enough for you to want the best for him? Is your son's Daddy behaving in a way that is best for him?

Good luck

Suzy - posted on 01/17/2010

If you feel forced into motherhood when you are not ready, please also consider adoption as an option. There are many couples/families out there just waiting for a little one to love.

Apryl - posted on 01/16/2010

If you arent ready to be a mom, and he obviously is a crappy dad, its not too late for adoption.

Kate - posted on 01/16/2010

You know, I didn't want to be a mom at 18 either, (now 11 years later) but we all know that we could of done our part to protect ourselves from having a child. When you fight the way you are not only is it hard on your lives but it is not suitable for your child. I had to become a mom and watch my life 2 mos after high school graduation turn a 180. Either find peace with your boyfriend or dump him and move on. You really can do it on your own. You may not like it but it is possible. We seem to expect everyone to save us but that is not so. Find happiness and be well. Also if you really are not wanting this child there is no shame in adopting him to a family that is ready for a child. Give him the best life either that be all three of you or just you or a family that is suitable for him. Make the best choice for your child. Peace be with your life!

Shannon - posted on 01/16/2010

i don't really understand how someone can get you pregnant on purpose. If you are not ready for a baby, use protection, and birth control. If you have unprotected s*x, you know there is a risk of pregnancy, whether he "pull out" or not. I just wish you the best and hope that your child's father will be mature enough to handle his responsibilities. All i know is your side of the story and don't really know his situation, so I can't judge, but i would like to suggest that the both of you try to create a friendship with each other, for the best of your child.

Shalina - posted on 01/16/2010

and please ignore all of these negative comments that attack you, your actions and decisions... in a lily white, perfect world all the shoulda woulda couldas might actually matter. but in the real world, there's no point in dwelling... we have to do what needs to be done and keep it moving! i'm sure circle of moms was created as a support system, not as a way for the high and mighty to pass judgement! like i said before f*** everything else and do the best you can!

Shalina - posted on 01/16/2010

it's natural to want him to be there for your son, but if him being there means your son being neglected... than that's not the place for your son to be and not in his best interest. always keep what is best for you son as you highest priority and f*** (excuse my language and bluntness) anything and everything else! and if she runs a home daycare and can't seem to manage changing a diaper or fixing a bottle... maybe she should be reported!!

Amy - posted on 01/16/2010

babies take two people to ceate...you were there

Mary - posted on 01/16/2010

Wow-that's the longest sentence I have ever read.If you don't want any more kids, at least for now and aren't planning on using protection then DON'T HAVE SEX! Plain and simple.If you didn't want to even look at him then why on earth did you have sex with him?

Tamara - posted on 01/16/2010

Seriously?? I don't think he held a gun to your head to get your pregnant. You need to accept responsibility for your roll in this situation and quite putting the blame on him. You're a big girl, you should have used protection, or better yet, just said NO. Now there is an innocent, precious baby who will grow up without a two parent family. You are the one who is selfish. You should have done what is best for your baby and put him up for adoption to a loving, two parent family. That would have been the most self-LESS act of love you could have done for your child.

Michelle - posted on 01/21/2010

Unfortunately he does sound selfish. My husband at the time got me pregnant on purpose so I know how that feels to have ur trust betrayed. My sons are wonderful and even though it was hard to accept at the time. He used that to keep me from leaving him & then I was on my own to care for him & I tried to leave him again & he promised to make it work and I agreed to have another child since we were married. Before he was born, his true colors still showed and I raised them on my own without his help. He lives 5 mins away too and has their whole lives and across the street from their daycare at the time but he was always too busy to help out too. You have the right idea, it's about you & ur son--it's his loss. to address Lou's comment---when you trust that ur birth control has not been tampered with and u know ur cycle and what days are not safe--to have that person violate that by intentionally causing "failure" to ur birth control--what are the "police" going to do?? It's a violation of ur trust same as if a man gets told "opps" I'm pregnant when he is lead to believe that birth control is being used properly. 2-way street.....I never thought of that & it happened to me.

Carol - posted on 01/20/2010

Forget him. Plus, if he got you pregnant on purpose without you wanting to be, that doesn't make sense. You are both in the boat. He didn't hold a gun to your head and force unprotected sex, in that case you would call the police. Sex out of marriage gets you a lot of grief and heartache, I know. I would forget him. He is not responsible, he has no respect for you nor the baby. He is overwhelmed with the fact he has to be playing a role in the child's life. The back and forth business is not healthy for the child. The child will feel tossed back and forth. Sorry but you need stability and so does this child. I am sorry to sound rude, but your situation is like many others, and yes there is a way. I would have him take a parenting plan and finish it and see where it goes from there!

MaryAnn - posted on 01/20/2010

you can debate all day over the "He got me pregnant on purpose"- I think she knows now that it "takes two to tango" They are both EQUALLY responsible for Eli. NOW.. to move on.. You cannot force Eli's dad to be in the pictue.. sure, you can go after him for child support, but will that make him Eli's Daddy? No.. Move on..Raise your beautiful baby, love him, keep him safe, be the best mom you can be. I know it's stressful..i've been there.. had a relationship, had a baby, raised the baby alone.. I had to learn to let the anger go, because if I didn't i would've been full of hate.. and hate isn't good when you're rasing a child. You will get through it.. My baby is almost 18 now.. and well adjusted..