help with husband

NATALIE - posted on 11/09/2010

TRY COUNCILING IF YOU WANT TO! YOU FIRST SHOULD SEE IF WANTS TO GO & WEIGH OUT THE PRO & CONS & IF IT IS FIXABLE OR EVEN WORTH BEING FIXED! YOU CAN'T STAY JUST FOR THE KIDS! IT'S NOT HEALTHY AT ALL! THEY WILL END UP IN A RELATIONSHIP JUST LIKE YOURS & U AREN'T HAPPY B/C YOU WOULD BE WANTING TO LEAVE! GOOD LUCK JUST DON'T THROW IT AWAY! MAKE SURE YOU DO WHAT YOU REALLY WANT 15 YEARS IS ALONG TIME BUT, ANOTHER 5 OF UNHAPPINESS CAN BE LONGER!!

Paulina - posted on 12/07/2009

you both need to be completley honest with each other about what your feeling with out any arguing it makes things worse and if you know your going to argue go to your room or outside somewhere your children wont see or else they are going to feel like the guilty ones and end up backing you up or him and if you two not talking out alone helps try councels or try going away to a friends house of parents for a week or so just you and the kids see how you feel with out your hubby around sometimes some distance apart helps the both of you {my sister in law and her hubby seperated for two weeks he couldn't stay away ffrom her and neither could she she realized she is still in love with him is just that lil hints or romantic times just for you two was needed now and then} have a date night once a week or every two see what helps the relationship

Angela - posted on 12/07/2009

I know it might sound obvious but have you just tried sitting down when you haven't been arguing and talking about it. Have you told him how you're feeling? Why is he saying it's your fault? I've been married for 21 years now and have 2 girls, 10 and 7. We all have difficult times in our relationships but it must be worth working at. We've always found that if you talk about how you're feeling and spend some quality time together you'll remember why you loved each other in the first place. Do you get the chance to go out on a date together and spend some special time alone. I find this also helps to keep your relationship going. If it's all about the kids all the time he may be feeling neglected too. Hope this helps and good luck.

Kathy - posted on 12/07/2009

It is hard for everyone right now, but that should bring you closer together as a couple, not farther apart. "For better and for worse," remember? :) Do you guys go to church? There are usually counselors there that can help. Now is the time for families to hold on to each other and to God. Please do all you can to save your marriage.

Teresa - posted on 12/07/2009

When your children see you argue they think its there fault,,I left my ex 12 years ago you would be amazed at what you can do once you leave..There are so many places out there that will help for no charge ..My girls are grown now and ask me all the time why i didnt leave sooner..And i wish i had at least for them ,,If you stay you will have some unhappy children and you will die inside.. Its not easy but it can be done..I Loved living with just me and my children!!!!

Lula - posted on 12/07/2009

have you guys tried counseling, i wouldn't leave a fifteen yr relationship without trying everything pssible. I have only been with my fiancee two yrs so I dont have a whole lot of personal experience in a situation lke this. However I don't know the full situatioin and I hve lived nine yrs with parents who hate each other and i know its hard on your kids. So I think counseling might help but if not I just hope you do whats best for you and your family but hopefully all will work out for the best

Jamie - posted on 12/07/2009

Will he go to counciling? I know most men wont because they are stubborn. If not, do you have friends/family that you can stay with until to get a job? Your kids seem to be at least old enough now that if you left to go to work it shouldn't be an issue.