Amy - posted on 05/16/2010 ( 13 moms have responded )
My daughter is 3 months old, and my fiancee's family is really not involved. They live across town (his mom and his brother) and his mom has only seen her once, his brother hasn't even met her. Neither one drives, his brother's gf drives them around. Lately, they have been eager to see her, mostly they want us to bring her to them but think they are willing to come here. Here is my problem. They all smoke, like pack a day smokers (his mom is on disability, recovering alcoholic, daily pot smokers) who smoke inside their house. They also have 2 dogs and a cat. They are not very clean people. I used to stay with my fiancee when he lived with her and their lack of hygiene makes me extremely uncomfortable. (i've never seen handsoap or sanitizer anywhere). So bringing my daughter to their house is out of the question. But I do not want the smell of smoke to be around my daughter. I know that the smell on clothes and hands can be harmful to babies, hell adult people as well but I don't want my baby girl exposed to those toxins! And my fiancee' understands this, he does, but I also know he wants his family to be apart of his daughters' life. I don't know how to deal with this. Or am I being extremely paranoid?? My daughter is so sensitive, she breaks out and itches around animals and such , I don't want her to get sick, but I don't know how to allow them in my home around my child under the influence of drugs and smelling like smoke and dog and who knows what else! Ah maybe there is no solution. Maybe I just needed to vent. I'll take any advice or if any of you have a similar deal and want to vent too I'll take that as well!!!