house keeping

Stifler's - posted on 04/19/2011

My mum made me pay $50 a week when I started making money after school was over to pay for the food I ate and some of the internet, electricity, etc. I used. You're not being a parent by making him pay? WTF. You'd be a worse parent if you let him bludge off you and didn't give him insight into the way the real world is, you pay rent and for your own food and it costs a lot more than living at home.

Jennifer - posted on 04/19/2011

I think you should find out what the going rate is for room and board in your area. If there is a university nearby, it shouldn't be too hard to find that out. I think that would be a more than fair amount, as another place would not put up with feeding his girlfriend or letting her stay over all the time. You are not doing him any favours by making it really comfortable for him to live at home. You need to charge him enough money or he will never be independent. So what if you make a profit off him? He has no problem receiving from you. He is totally taking you for granted! If you feel guilty about the amount, you could put some of the money aside without telling him, and give it to him when he moves out. Or use it for renovations, a trip, etc! You have worked hard and sacrificed for your child for years. Now he is an adult and needs to stand on his own two feet.
Good luck!

Amanda - posted on 11/11/2010

You child is grown and can keep care of himself. So stop worring about what he thinks of you, and "make a profit off him." Charge a few 100 less then it would cost him to live on his own, he is clearly taking advantage of you, if he was able to buy a home, finish school, he is sure as heck able to start paying his parents for the 20 years they paid for him :0)

Sherri - posted on 11/10/2010

I will be charging about $250-$300 a month and will be putting all the money I get for them in an account which I will present to them when they graduate college to help with expenses of getting there first place.

Jen - posted on 11/10/2010

just kick him out if he wont pay me n my bf pay 80 pound a month to his parents n we dnt wrk n dnt have alot of money. but i cook our own food tidy there house n do my own washing.

Schyla - posted on 11/10/2010

honestly if he feels your doing him an injustice by charging him for the services you provide it's time to send him on his way. He knows what it was costing to live on his own as you said. He came back because HE benefited from it. You deserve resepct if for nothing less then that you've allowed this over grown child to continue living with you. At least he's working and not just depending on you for everything. So you have three choices 1) write up a rental agreement includ what is his resposiblity and what is yours whats acceptable and what isn't and if he can't agree to it or you cannot meet a compromise then he's gone 2 charge him per service like someone else suggested if you was a load of his laundry that 5 if you feed him and his over night guest that 20 (or what ever is acceptable) if she spends the night that an extra 45 or 3) you can keep letting him take advantage of you.

Julie - posted on 11/10/2010

well im not charging him £250-£300 and he is kicking of, my parents have told him we are making a profit out of him as we wanted £200, he only want to pay £150 so we have said that means no feeding girl-friend in week and only 1 stay over a week-end. now he claims we arnt acting like parents. i wish id could take his money and save it for him but i cant, as it is we dont drink, smoke or go out very often all of which he does to excess. i wish they were all small again im not coping with teenagers very well now my health is suffering to. thanks for ur comments.

Laura - posted on 11/10/2010

I believe the rule of thumb for housing budgets is 25 - 30% of take home pay per month. That would put his rent at between 250 -300 pounds a month. Of course you are free to negotiate up based on some of the extra services you are providing for him. Or you can choose to lower rent because he's family. Either way, it's ultimately your choice.

Lyndsay - posted on 11/10/2010

I recently worked in a group home with a boy who was about to graduate high school, turn 19 in the summer, and be discharged from the group home to move out on his own (the CAS would be paying his living expenses). He wasn't really motivated and wasn't making any real effort towards using life skills, so we started charging him for services. So, for every load of laundry done by the staff, we would charge him $1 (his allowance was like $20 a week, so I imagine for your son you could charge more than this!), every time we had to clean his room was $3, etc. He didn't really like having to pay for these things and it really motivated him to get off his ass and do it himself! Just an idea. :)

Erica - posted on 11/10/2010

I would take the cost of food, rent or mortgage payment, and any other normal bills and divided them by how many are in the house. Make him pay his share....I agree with letting kids stay while they are in school however it sounds like he is abusing this priviledge

Julie - posted on 11/10/2010

he is 20 and has finished an 4 year apreentaship so is a skilled man who left home brought his own housenand decided he was better of at home so he knows the cost of living and he is on his 4 car and befroe that he had several motor bikes 1 of which we brought.

Rhea - posted on 11/10/2010

how old is this child? IMO, if my kid has not graduated secondary school (or is younger than 18), then they get to live in my house for free. I'd want to give my kids a headstart before moving out, to save up some money and get a car without having to worry about paying rent.