how are moms suppost to relate or respond or get advice all these topics are locked?

Katherine - posted on 04/09/2010

Stevie: Not a debate, if it continues, what Jenn said stands.

Katherine
CoM
Administrator

~Jennifer - posted on 04/09/2010

Stevie,



It started in a different thread. Warnings were issued by 2 mods in that thread - multiple warnings. Offensive posts were deleted, and after those repeated warnings and the subsequent locking of the original thread, another one was started to continue the argument.

You have no idea of the entirety of the incident, so let's not use this as your opportunity to grandstand about an incident you've only gotten one side of from a friend.

She's unblocked and you're dragging this out to create drama. Let's end that now, ok?



If you don't like the way we monitor the community, you're more than welcome to seek out another one in which you feel more comfortable with their rules.



For those of you that ave not read "flagging and posting etiquette" (which is pinned at the top of the forum) here's a short review:



Please be respectful of others' opinions, even when you disagree

If any of the following happen to you, then you may flag the offending post as inappropriate.



1. slurs, stereotyping, or hate speech.

2. threats or personal attacks.

3. others posting the same thing again and again within the same group or across multiple groups.

4.. advertisements and solicitations.



Please note: Moderators can now see who flags and their reason for doing so. Do not flag just because someone’s opinion differs to yours, in such a large forum not everyone will agree, we are here to share our experience and advice. We will not tolerate unnecessary and pointless flagging. Members who continue to flag gratuitously will be blocked from contributing to this community.



Threads will be locked if ....

Debate becomes argument

The thread has been up for a substantial amount of time and the original post has been answered or

The thread has gone completely off topic



Threads/ posts will be deleted if



They include auto-start videos. Members who want to post a youtube link must put 'video included’ in the header of the thread or it will be deleted.



They are new H1N1 threads- This topic has become too controversial and is causing fights on the main page. If you start a new conversation about it, it will be deleted



Flame Wars within threads will not be tolerated. If you have a problem with a member: keep it private do not splatter the welcome page with your disagreements.



If it continues after a warning you will be blocked for 24hrs, if it happens again you will be blocked indefinitely.

No questions



http://www.circleofmoms.com/welcome-to-c...

Stevie - posted on 04/09/2010

oh and sorry but im not asking for drama like i said i know drama doesn leave but what you guys dont block is the cause for the post that some of you lock so yet again all im saying is block the ppl who are causing other moms to become upset for the way other women are treating ppl and block them not the moms upset cuz someone else is acting inmature

Stevie - posted on 04/09/2010

actually no the only person who had commented on her post was one of you the moderators none the less that was all one post saying im blocking you for 24 hrs and locking this no one had said anything but one single moderator

~Jennifer - posted on 04/09/2010

Stevie, the thread the other member started was in response to one that had gotten locked because it got out of hand. She chose to continue the fight after multiple warnings from at least 2 moderators. THAT'S why she got blocked for 24 hours- which was actually more like 12 hours, as I took the block off at 9 am my time the next day......as if we need to explain , but whatever....

Take the time to read the pinned threads and you'll see how and why we do things here.



If you want to see drama continue for thousands of posts, I suggest www.cafemom.com

Anyone can go to their site and be the biggest drama llama they would like to, but we prefer to keep this site in the "Adult Level", so we do not allow drama here, and we try to diffuse or 'shut down (lock) threads in which these things occur. Some threads will be re-opened the following day after a cooling off period, and some threads remain locked as the topic has been beat to death.



The Admin & Mods were appointed here after REQUESTING the opportunity to clean up this community back in August. There were 15,000 or so threads back then. No, we didn't go through and lock all of the old ones, as it's pointless to do so, but when they do show up at the front of the page, and the OP has obviously abandoned the post, we lock them to make room for new topics.



We lock repetitive threads. We had 5 'constipation' threads going the other day. We don't need 5 threads on the same topic, so we allow a certain # of replies, and then lock it so that another member might have their question answered. Common threads such as these (constipation, eczema, cradle cap, diaper rash- there's usually 2 - 3 threads a day on these issues), get locked at about 100 posts, as they become repetitive in both topic and replies, and someone else will ask the same question again on one of these topics about 2 hours after we lock it according to posting patterns we have discovered on CoM.



We lock a thread when the OP abandons it- we give them at least 200 replies before we do, but again, we make room for new questions from other members by doing so.



We lock threads when the OP deletes her original question and the replies move into first position.



We lock threads when the OP deactivates her account.



We lock threads that violate T.H.U.M.P.S (see 'guidelines' in the tab at the top of the page)



Members can lock their own threads by clicking on "admin options' right under the title of the thread and selecting 'close this question'.



The OP can always message the Admin or one of the Mods to request that their thread be reopened, and we will take it into consideration.



I would suggest searching smaller communities on CoM. Less members = longer threads that probably won't get locked.

Stevie - posted on 04/09/2010

idk how ppl can lock their own post i have tried to figure it out and never saw anything and i know that i saw a post that a lady had wrote that wasnt bad at all and someone had wrote im lockiing this and you are on a 24 hour block from anything im sure you understand why what i dont understand is why are you blocking and locking post that naturally arent that bad cuz they want to ask a question like why are you blocking me but not the ones who should be blocked i could name a few ppl who should be more than blocked and just kicked out but im not the point your finger at type of person but im just saying why is it ppl who just ask a simple question that could not even be about other ppl being locked or blocked or anything it maybe just why are you guys letting these women come straite out and be rude or making fun of other women just for a simple question it isnt right were not in middle school anymore i know drama doesn stop when your not in school but seriously im just thinking pick and chose and figure out who the real problem is cuz most the time its not the person you locked/blocked....

Kazzandra - posted on 04/09/2010

I never said it was a problem, I just merely wanted to know why they were locked and yes when I first log on on my home page it says Popular Topics, and most all of them are locked, Im not judging anyone for locking them, I understand people have there reasons and thats okay by me. Thank You All for letting me know why these topics could possibly be locked

Andrea - posted on 04/09/2010

That would be 12 locked threads in 8 days actually...just sayin'. Everyone's opinion is different as to what should be locked and not as well as who should be blocked and not.

Charlie - posted on 04/08/2010

Lets not also forget that the original poster can lock their own thread too , this is all explained in the pinned threads at the top of the community :)

Jodi - posted on 04/08/2010

Andrea, what I meant by really old topics is that if someone responds to a topic that is years old, and suddenly it jumps up the front again, and we notice it, it will generally be locked. But honestly, there really aren't that many locked. I don't see what the big deal is. 12 locked threads in a month isn't many. And if someone was blocked for 24 hours, well, they earned that privilege.

Kate CP - posted on 04/08/2010

I didn't see any rude responses. Look, you gotta have thick skin to do the internet forum game. And Stevie, if you want a good debate might I suggest Debating Mums or Parenting Hot Topics?

Katherine - posted on 04/08/2010

Kazzandra there are 2 main reasons threads are locked:

1. 200+ posts

2. It got out of hand

Sorry you're having trouble.

Andrea - posted on 04/08/2010

I didn't say there was a lot of locked posts. I was referring to the fact that there are many really old threads that are still open that have been answered and yet there are some that were started last month that have been answered that have been locked as it was stated that topics that are really old are locked.

I did however look into the locked conversation thing and this month alone there have been 12 locked posts. I also know of a thread that was started on April 6th that was locked and the person that opened it was banned for 24 hours, but the thread is missing so maybe others have been deleted as well.

Kazzandra - posted on 04/08/2010

Okay, look I wasnt trying to offend anyone, its just all the post that I seem that is relative to me, or I can relative to, and want to respond to seem to be locked, for what reason idk but thats ok I new here I was merly wondering why there locked. I didnt ask for anyone to be rude to me, but apparently this is not the place for me, if the 1st post and question I ask I get rude responses. Those of you who told me why these post are locked, and giving advise on private messages Thank You Very Much

Sharon - posted on 04/08/2010

Um fair warning, if you're going to private message someone with advice you think they many not want to hear or to give your contradictory opinion.... you may get a reply that doesn't sit well with you. But if you have something truely constructive & helpful to say... by all means, Private message someone.

~Jennifer - posted on 04/08/2010

Ok, seriously?



There's 4 locked posts and 296 open posts in the first 6 pages of threads.



What forum are you all looking at with this "all these topics are locked"?



....because I don't see it. 4 locked out of 300 on the first 6 pages is "a lot"?



k.

Andrea - posted on 04/08/2010

There are so many really old posts that have been answered still going and new ones that have been answered and locked...that really doesn't make sense.

~Jennifer - posted on 04/08/2010

If a topic is locked and you wish to reply to the OP, you can always send them a private message.

Stevie - posted on 04/08/2010

not that offten my butt almost all of them are come on alot of them end up getting locked but are good ones to have a convo about some things might become heated but come on thats life i can understand locking ones that have ppl being rude and wrong or just plan picking on others but those seem to only be the ones that are NEVER locked and sorry thats wrong and the ones for ppl who want to stand up and say hey this is wrong and they get locked or blocked from saying anything cuz they wanted to say that its wrong for these other ppl to get away with it is just crap i mean pick and chose your battles i would think that all of us as mothers that should be a lession we all know right well idk i guess not but you know i dont return to some of my post cuz im not getting told that someone commented on my post maybe if COM had that working out again (and yes ive tried everything) then ppl would go back or maybe other moms just have a life who dont sit on here tormenting other moms or whatever idk just my oppenion go ahead and block me if you want or comment back something mean or whatever you want to call it but seriously its true and on another thing sometimes we dont see all the post cuz were not on all the time or for some other reasons and by the time we see the one we might actually know exactly what to do to help are already locked and we cant help

Christina - posted on 04/08/2010

I fell ya! Seems like you go to answer and you see that the topic is locked. I jsut skip that one and go to the next.

Jodi - posted on 04/08/2010

All which topics are locked? Sorry, it would help if you could be more specific. Often, topics will be locked if the number of posts goes over 200 and the OP doesn't return to the thread, or if the topic is really old. It could also be locked if the thread topic became too heated, or the if the OP chose to lock the thread themselves. But topics are generally locked for a reason, and not really all that often.......there aren't really THAT many of them. You make it sound like every topic is locked. There are still hundreds, if not thousands of unlocked tthreads, so I am not sure what the problem is??