How can I get my 21 month old to talk more, she doesnt really say much, but she does know some words? Any suggestions

Charlene - posted on 01/27/2009 ( 28 moms have responded )

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She knows what I am asking her to do, but when I am trying to get her to talk to me, she says ehh.... I know what she wants, but I want her to start talking more.

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Carrie - posted on 01/27/2009

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My brother refused to use words, though he understood fine what was being said and requested of him. When he wanted something he would simply point, my mother even had him tested for being deaf... However one days my mother over heard him talking to his toys and using full sentences.She then decided to wait for his words when he wanted something rather than allowing the grunt or the pointing to continue. She said within half a day he was using his words beautifully.

Maria - posted on 01/27/2009

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Just give her time she needs to put the words together its in there. Trust me when she starts you will want her to stop I went through the same thing with mine now she won't stop. so just give her some time.

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Melissa - posted on 01/28/2009

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I'm in the same boat, my 21 month old is not saying much. He has a good handful of words but I'm ready for more because we both get frustrated! There's a lot of good advice on here and as long as we are doing everything we can to encourage them, all that's left is waiting until their ready!

[deleted account]

Quoting Irasema:



Quoting Kerry:

Don't ever use a dummy/pacifier, spend more time talking to your child, giving them time to answer, and even have 'pretend' conversations where you respond to their sounds or what they are looking at. Talk to your child about everything you see, things you have done, whatever. My son hasn't shut up since he was a couple of months old and although he has few actually recognisable words, we have conversations all the time. Find something they are interested in and new people to 'talk' to. If your child hears lots of positive conversations and is involved in them, they will soon start joining in because its something FUN that ADULTS do!






My child had a pacifier and started speaking in complete sentences at 18 months of age!!! My Girls also had pacifiers and they starting speaking right on schedule. The Pacifier is NOT the problem.






depends on how long the 'pacifier' is used for, but i know of families that used pacifiers for some of their children and not others and they all say that the children without pacifiers all started speaking at a much earlier age.  Yr children might be 'right on schedule', but they would probably be 'advanced' if they never had a 'pacifier'.  In Australia we call them dummies.  We call them that for a reason.  My boy at 11 months went up to a 2 year old with a dummy, pulled it out of his mouth, threw it on the ground and gave him a look  wish i caught on camera!  The 2 year old could hardly speak a word, whilst my son never shuts up (lots of sounds and not many recognisable words).  And dummies/pacifiers cause damage to the teeth and gums.



 



 



Charlene: When the child is making  noise and you know what she wants, do you say out loud what it is you know she wants?  like, "what's that darling, you would like a glass of juice?  You want mum to get you a glass of juice?, I can get you  glass of juice"



 



And baby sign language is excellent.  They found the speaking children of deaf parents (and babies taught sign language) actually develop language skills better than those not taught.  Its to do with the visual-spatial side of the brain being used as well as the language side.  This has positive ramifications throughout the childs life!  Starting with just a handful of signs is a great start.  My boy at 9 months recognised the gesture for shower and would crawl to the bathroom, pull himself up on the side of the bath, and call out 'dad dad dad' or 'mum mum mum'.



 

Michiko - posted on 01/28/2009

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Thanks for the Albert Einstein info, haha!  My 3 year old taught herself the alphabet (Lower & Upper Case) when she was 18 months old & could write both cases when she was 2-1/2 ~ but she didn't start talking until just recently.  I attributed it to the fact that her older sister gets her whatever she wants, so she doesn't need to talk + I was enjoying the silence as long as I could!.  But, she's reading & writing now...so, maybe there's something to it!

[deleted account]

Quoting Kerry:

Don't ever use a dummy/pacifier, spend more time talking to your child, giving them time to answer, and even have 'pretend' conversations where you respond to their sounds or what they are looking at. Talk to your child about everything you see, things you have done, whatever. My son hasn't shut up since he was a couple of months old and although he has few actually recognisable words, we have conversations all the time. Find something they are interested in and new people to 'talk' to. If your child hears lots of positive conversations and is involved in them, they will soon start joining in because its something FUN that ADULTS do!



My child had a pacifier and started speaking in complete sentences at 18 months of age!!! My Girls also had pacifiers and they starting speaking right on schedule. The Pacifier is NOT the problem.

[deleted account]

Quoting Tara:

I have a 4 year old that didn't talk much until she was almost 3. They say that in some cases that is a smarter child. She is just taking it all in and will talk when she wants. But you know, old wives tale. If you are really concerned about it, why not try telling her words for her favorite things. Reward her with it or something yummy when she says it. Rewarding for good behavior and tasks is so good for them. Makes them feel grown up and important. Even if she is only 21 months. And if she is an only child, sometimes it just takes longer for them to talk because they are babied longer. I know I sure did that with my first and my youngest. You just never know. Hope this helps you. Glad to help anytime.



Albert Einstien didn' t speak until he was 3 years old and then he spoke in complete sentences. Just a little trivia for anybody who cares

Glory - posted on 01/27/2009

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I have the same problem with my son! I've been trying to read to him as much as possible. Also I have been singing more and having "conversations" with him. I hope that this helps but I guess all kids do go at their pace so I'm trying not to get too stressed about it. Good luck to you :)

[deleted account]

My eldest was talking at 10 months and my second son is 20 months and he is only saying about 3 words. They all talk at their own speed and Im sure when your daughter wants to talk she will. My mum said I didnt say a word at all until I was 3. I understood everything that was said and followed instructions and I just didnt talk. I wanted my son to say please so if he wanted something and he would point I would say 'please' and not give it to him until he said it back. It took a few goes and alot of crying when he wouldnt say it and I didnt give him what he wants but now I dont even have to tell him to say it, he just does it on his own.

Christina - posted on 01/27/2009

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I heard that using sign language can actually discourage a childs language skills. I'm not sure that that's true or not but I would do a little research on it before I used that as a method of communication. It makes sense, why talk if you get everything you want or need by using hand signals?



My older daughter used a binky only until she was 6 months and didn't hit the 500 word mark until she was 25 months. My younger daughter has surpassed the 500 word mark, is 20 months and still has her binky. I'm sure that it plays into how clear they speak but I'm not sure that it plays into actual vocabulary.



Just talk, talk, talk and encourage her to enter into the converstation and read to her. The more words she hears the better.

User - posted on 01/27/2009

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sign language.  There is baby signing time which my little girls has loved and is easy to learn with songs for everything.  I had her watch that before she could talk and then when she did she did both.

Beth - posted on 01/27/2009

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I also agree with Donna. My daughter learned sign language before words. It makes understanding from your end sooooo much easier.

Beth - posted on 01/27/2009

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Does she use a passi? My daughter would always walk around with a passi until I took it away and she likes to talk now. But she isn't as advanced as some of her friends, so with that I know she will say more when she's ready.

Anne - posted on 01/27/2009

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she will talk. just keep on talking to her and one day she will talk right back.

Christina - posted on 01/27/2009

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Kerry's right. Just talk, talk, talk. I started working from home when my little one was 15 months. She had a 10 word vocabulary. Within a month her vocabulary grew to 50+ and now at 20 months her vocabulary must be in the 500 word range and she speaks in 5-6 word sentences.



It will definately come in time and I certainly wouldn't worry about it. Every child develops at thier own pace but if she points to a snack, don't just hand her a snack, say "Do you want that cracker?" and give her time to respond to your question. If she just nods or grunts say "Yes, you want the cracker. Ok. Here is the cracker." and then give it to her. Don't just give in to the grunts and pointing, give her the words she needs to express herself. Don't force anything though. Carry it on like a normal conversation, this will also teach her important conversation skills. If she pronounces something incorrectly (my older daughter started with Gogga for Dog) repeat the word in a sentence "You see a Dog?" so you are not pointing out her mistake but she hears the correct pronunciation.



I also agree that once they start talking, you wish that they would stop. That doesn't happen immediately though. I think it happens around three and five when the begin to give you a detailed report on thier day down to the mundane fact that "Jody drew on the paper and it was all scribbles and I said I could do better and she said I couldn't and I said I could and she said I couldn't and then I drew one and it was much better Mom. It really was much better but she said it wasn't and I said it was and don't you think that I draw better than Jody does Mom? Mom?? Mom! Are you listening to me? I'm telling you about my day. You asked me how my day was!" I call it diarhia of the mouth. :)

Rachel - posted on 01/27/2009

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Just read to her as much as possible with books that only have one to three words and then ask "What is that" when you point to the pic of the word.

Melissa - posted on 01/27/2009

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Is she your only child? Cause I find that the second and so on children sometimes talk a little later. Cause they have their older sibling to speak for them. I have seen this with not only my own kids but a lot of people I know with 2 or more, especially if there is a bigger age gap between the two and the older can talk very well. For example my oldest who will be 6 is a month was speaking almost clear sentences by 18 months. She already could count to ten and do her ABC's by herself. My youngest on the other had is 22 months and she is just starting to use word that most of the time I am the only one who can understand them, but when I say try to ask her a question or talk to her her older sister jumps right in with the answer. I am trying to get my oldest to stop doing that, but it is hard she enjoys being able to read her sister.

Paulette - posted on 01/27/2009

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Hi Charlene, How many words does she say? I noticed that she has an older sibling...do they interact and talk? Some children learn by example. Here is a link to a website that may give you a guideline to go on: http://www.pbs.org/wholechild/abc/commun.... Is your daughter manner reserved and quiet or outgoing and bubbly? Depending on the household too, if it is noisy or quiet can have an affect on them too. If you are truely concerned then have a speech pathologist give her an assestment it may give you peace of mind. Each child is different too. Our daughter is 15 months and had her checkup. The dr said the typical child at this age speaks 5-6 words. She speaks well more than that and has an older sibling. I hope you find the answers you are looking for. Take care and have a good day tomorrow.

Cathy - posted on 01/27/2009

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We sang to our boys from the time they were infants.  Our middle son (a premie) learned to sing sentences before he could put words together in speech, at about  2 years.  He is now a college grad!  I think sign language is an excellent idea too.  Do you read to her regularly?   Short picture books with simple words can help children associate words with ideas too.  They'll often point to pictures and say the word.

Amanda - posted on 01/27/2009

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My daughter is 27 months. At 24 months I was kind of worried because she wasn't saying too much that we could understand. Now, she is talking all the time! Teach her some simple songs to get her interested in saying words -- she'll start copying you and eventually she'll be talking up a storm!

Amy - posted on 01/27/2009

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I started teaching my daughter some simple sign language. Since then it's easier for me to understand her, and her vocabulary is really growing. There are lots of books about baby sign language out there if you need help. Try your local library first, they usually have several.

User - posted on 01/27/2009

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You can try incorporating some basic sign language, like "please" , "thank you" , "more" and common items that she likes to play with.  This can help her to begin to communicate with you and help both of you keep from getting frustrated.  "On Becoming Babywise II" by G. Ezzo has some in the back of the book.  I recommend keeping it basic.  We started using it with our son at around 9-10 months old and when he was ready he began adding the words to the signs.



 

Michiko - posted on 01/27/2009

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HI ~ This one caught my eye because I have two daughters & totally agree with Maria ~ I couldn't wait to have conversations with my daughter...now, she's 11 & hasn't STOPPED talking since she learned how!  Trust us, ENJOY the sweet sounds of her babbling while it lasts...some kids just use words later than others!  BTW, my 3 year old didn't talk as early as her sister...and it was F I N E with M E :-)   But, if you INSIST...she's still young...so, keep encouraging her to use her "words" & maybe spend some time with picture books of items used on a daily basis & encourage her to tell you what the items/activities are?  GOOD LUCK! 

Jennifer - posted on 01/27/2009

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If she is listening and understanding you then don't worry. She'll talk when she's good and ready. Just wait, one day you'll look back and wish she'd stop talking for a few minutes!

[deleted account]

probably not so good if that something yummy is junk food. In fact,using food as a reward can set up life-long problems. is there something else that could be a reward? a walk to the park and a go on a swing? we use hot wheels cars for our son and lots of positive attention

[deleted account]

Don't ever use a dummy/pacifier, spend more time talking to your child, giving them time to answer, and even have 'pretend' conversations where you respond to their sounds or what they are looking at. Talk to your child about everything you see, things you have done, whatever. My son hasn't shut up since he was a couple of months old and although he has few actually recognisable words, we have conversations all the time. Find something they are interested in and new people to 'talk' to. If your child hears lots of positive conversations and is involved in them, they will soon start joining in because its something FUN that ADULTS do!

Tara - posted on 01/27/2009

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I have a 4 year old that didn't talk much until she was almost 3. They say that in some cases that is a smarter child. She is just taking it all in and will talk when she wants. But you know, old wives tale. If you are really concerned about it, why not try telling her words for her favorite things. Reward her with it or something yummy when she says it. Rewarding for good behavior and tasks is so good for them. Makes them feel grown up and important. Even if she is only 21 months. And if she is an only child, sometimes it just takes longer for them to talk because they are babied longer. I know I sure did that with my first and my youngest. You just never know. Hope this helps you. Glad to help anytime.

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