How do I deal with my 11 year old and boys?

Heather - posted on 08/15/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My 11 yr old daughter is boy CRAZY....overnight boys were hot & sexy and it's driving me crazy and most of all worries me. Alot of her friends, who all spend alot of time in my home, are the same way. I get all kinds of questions about boys and how old is too old, is it okay to tongue kiss a boy and ewww...I don't want to answer questions like that but I do...in an apropriate way. The other girls tell me they can't talk to their own mom's, even Sophia can't talk to her "step mom" like she can me. My fear is her coming home pregnant or with a disease that can kill her and I just feel like I have to tell them how to be safe and that sex is a serious deal and boys will say ANYTHING just to get in their pants...and she just started her first period so it scares me even worse. I'm thinking about putting her on the depot shot, and not telling her dad. But I know that's extreme, she's only 11 and I feel like I've explained everything till I'm blue in the face BUT I'm still so worried. How does any other of you mother's handle this?

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4 Comments

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Sherri - posted on 08/28/2011

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Personally be watchful and make sure she is with adult supervision at all times. She is way to young to be without it. Make sure you are also talking with her openly and honestly and just make sure she is monitored and never has an opportunity to be unsupervised around young men.

Katherine - posted on 08/28/2011

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Like the others said keep the lines of communication open. Don't blow it off because then they feel they have no one to talk to. I wish my mom would have been open with me, but she wasn't. It seems so young these days for 11 year olds to be asking these questions. It seems they get younger and younger.
I have 2 daughters and plan on having "the" conversation with them. I would rather they know than not and do something stupid.


It's especially important they know about STD"s and pregnancy. You are doing the right thing by being there for these girls.

Sam - posted on 08/28/2011

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Keep doing what you are doing communicating. Having open communication is ideal, just stress the negative things that can happen and what boys are really like. If you have given her all the info then all you can really do now is trust her. Please don't put her depo, that could screw up her hormones sooooo badly. I was on it from age 17 to 22 and I got a lot of the side effects, 11 is way too young for the depo shot (just my opinion ). From the sounds of it you are doing a great job, just the fact that your daughter and her friends will talk to you about these things is a very good sign. Good luck!

Louise - posted on 08/28/2011

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What your daughter is doing is natural in these days I am afraid. Children become sexually aware far earlier because they are exposed to sex all of there lives through pop videos and magasines. Just because she is showing an interest does not mean she is putting it about or going to. In still in her one to one that her virginity is something to be cherished. Ask her to be honest with you at all times and that if she has a boyfriend you would like to know and meet him. Do not shut down on the area of sex and relationships keep doing what you are doing but as a parent not a best friend. I think she is far to young yet for contraception but if she is dating a lot of boys and you are concerned that things are moving far to quickly then by all means take her to the doctors and protect her. 11 is not to young to explain about sexual diseases and how to use a condom.

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