How do I get my 2 year old to sleep in her own bed?

Ashley - posted on 04/29/2013

My 2 year old has been sleeping with us since she was born & she started to play with our ear to get to sleep. How do I get her to sleep in her own bed without having to play with my ear to get her to sleep?

Anna - posted on 11/02/2010

I haven't read all the replies, so sorry if this is redundant! I agree with the person who said it would be good to start her off in the same place you want her to sleep. If she doesn't like her bed, what about starting her off on a mat or blanket on the floor? You could hype it up and talk about how exciting it is that she gets to sleep on a special soft cuddle-mat in her very own room with her very own toys. As far as getting her to stay there, in my experience you just need to pick something that you know you can stick with, because consistency really is the key. Good luck!!!

Leslie - posted on 08/18/2009

I have the exact same problem with my 2 yr 7mon daughter Alyssa!! She had a hard time sleeping in the crib -- and the cry it out thing was out in like 3 or 4 days. At 12 mon when she got off the bottle, we would do the routine of bath, and saying goodnight to random things through out the house, and then a story or two -- but for whatever reason I did this on the couch - why I dont know??!!??! So when she fell asleep and was THEN put to bed in her room -- she would cry out! SOOOOO I just leave her on the couch and she sleeps though the night. In her room its like she is scared - whatever I am going to bed too, so she can have the couch. However after I came across this I am considering tring the redecorating ideas with her, and I like the idea of spending more time in her room durring the day for it to be more comforting at night!! It's time -- she has her own room and she should be in it with all the toys and clothes we paid good money for (not to mention the furniture)!!

Andrea - posted on 08/18/2009

I had the same problem but i did a smile chart, and asker her does she want a smile face, of course the answer was yes! after 5 nights of getting a smile face she gets a prize, this now is up to 25 smile faces. This worked for us.. We also let her help buy the linen etc for the bed. Hope this helps

Irene Doreen - posted on 08/17/2009

i have an issue with my son 17months. He is still breast feeding and does not want to leave our bed. am expecting another baby by feb 2010.Please help i feel am so tired..

Megan - posted on 08/07/2009

I have the some problem. If my 2 and 1/2 want to have a sleep in the afternoon. She will not sleep in her room she wants to sleep in our bed

Claire - posted on 08/07/2009

we had the same problem with our little girl she had been sleeping downstairs with us and in our room from an early age it also seemed like she hated her bed,she too used to come in our bed around 2 in morning it was driving us mad we got to the stage where we needed sleep,

so one day me and huby decided to take in turns to take her up to bed with her bottle of milk we stayed with her every nite till she fell asleep for a week or so and we cracked it its been over 2 months months now and we have had the odd puppy eyes sad face "i want to sleep on sofa" but we wont give in as we both get a full nights kip its great you just got to be firm untill they get used to it.

Elmari - posted on 08/07/2009

I also think it is not a good idea for the child to fall asleep on the couch. Made her room a fun experience. Let her choose some off the stuff in her room. Let her play more in her room during the day so that she can get comfortable in her room. Also put a night light in her room. If she comes to your room during the night take her back and sit with her till she falls asleep again, but explain to her that you are going back to your room as soon as she is sleeping again. Give her a reward the next morning is she stays in her room. It can be a walk to the park, or any thing she likes.

Lorraine - posted on 08/07/2009

Hi All, I was in the same boat my little girl is 2 & 9 months & we have another one coming in 2 months. As hard as we tried Emma world not sleep in her own bed, she would go to bed ok but in the middle of the nite she would cry & we took her in with us. This was the worst thing we could hve done because then it went form her going to bed at 7.30 telling her a story & rubing her toes & her falling asleep to her going to bed but not sleeping & sobbing till we took her out & in with us. Last November we were getting our room painted & the bed & all was taken out (she would have been 2 & 1 month) when she wouldnt settle & start crying we took her out & showed her that Mam & Dad had no bed that it was broken & the man took it away so she couldnt sleep with us. It took us 2 nites where she sobbed but we didnt run in straight away & take her up we left her for a while then went in lay her back down told her she was the best girl in the world. It was the hardest thing & broke our heart but now she goes to bed at 7.30 - 7.45 we tell her 2 stories, she might wake during the nite crying we go in lay her back down rub her head tell her she is a big girl & we are so pround of her & we love her & she falls back asleep. We also got her a little nite light. On Tuesday we decided to take her off doddies & she has been great still wakes looking for them but we tell her they went to her baby cousin cause she has none. Hope this helps I know its not easy but a few days of struggling will pay off. Good luck.

Marianne - posted on 08/06/2009

My wee boy is now 5 1/2. From the minute he came home from hospital 24 hrs after he was born he refused to go to sleep on his own and was waking 3-4 times a night. I am a single mum and I tried everything all of the suggestions above. When he was 2 I stopped letting him have his nap during the day(which horrified his grandparents) which meant he was going to sleep quicker at night and maybe only waking twice. Even now if he has 5 mins sleep he wont go to bed until midnight so no sleep during the day is allowed for my sanity as well as his! As he got older I let him fall asleep on my knee but if the phone rang or someone called at the door I had to start all over again. I tried the putting him to bed, leaving the room, when he came out ignoring him and putting him back. this lasted for 2 weeks before I gave in as i was exhausted after sitting up till almost 3am every night on my own and there was no sign of it getting better. About 6 months ago i was ready to pull my hair out as i was having to go to bed with him to get him to go to sleep as he was now to heavy to carry to bed. I wasn't getting anytime on my own and was just exhausted. At this point I got my new partner to put him to bed. It was the first night ever that he went to bed with relatively no fuss and stayed all night. He did this for one week and each night my son kissed me goodnight, cried a bit but went to bed no problem. This is still the case. When my partner isn't here he will play up a bit and come out of his room once or twice but generally he is very good. I am now having more fun with him as i'm not as exhausted and actually look forward to putting him to bed. I don't know what the change was maybe a man figure in his life... i don't know. He always would have joined me at about 1am and snuggle up that close to me that I couldn't move this no longer happens he stays put in his own bed and every morning he gets a smiley face for doing so. Life is so different for all of us now as he goes to bed at 7pm and sleeps till at least 7am which is fine as I have to get up at that time to go to work.

Katie - posted on 08/06/2009

OK so I have a 2 1/2 year old boy and a 12 month old girl. We have a similar problem only we put him to bed in his crib (lately it can take him 1-2 hours to fall asleep and then (except for last night) he's waking up between 1-2am and won't go to sleep until he's in our bed! We have a routine (up at 7am, lunch at 12noon, nap at 1pm until about 3pm, dinner at 5pm and bedtime routine ie 7pm put toys away, pjs and lotion, storytime with milk in sippy cup,brush teeth, kisses goodnight & pray that puts the actual in crib time at 7:45-8pm. He used to go to sleep quickly, but now it's as I mentioned above. He may not even be sleeping until 10pm!!! What am I doing wrong? And what can help? I thought at this age they only need between 10-12 hours to sleep in a day?

Danielle - posted on 08/06/2009

Ok, so my daughter, 2yrs and 2mos co-slept with us since birth and would cry hysterically if she wasn't near me, couldn't even sleep in the co-sleeper. Shortly after her last birthday my parents gave me a twin bed they weren't using. My Dad brought it over and she was very interested in it. A few days later I had her HELP me set it up and put the sheets etc on it. We put it on the floor in our room without the frame and have a guard up. I told her we were going to start taking naps there but that night when I asked her where she wanted to go to sleep, she pointed to the bed. I was absolutely shocked!! She has slept there ever since. So, first off I would try to have her actually fall asleep in bed. I have my daughter out of my bed but I still have to lay with her until she goes to sleep (if anyone has suggestions for getting out of that one, I'd love you forever). Second make the bed something she can associate as her own. I think that's what did it for my daughter. Also, in the very beginning i would bring her into my bed when she got up. Then I would lay in her bed, which I got very tired of. Now, I just told her that she doesn't NEED me to go to sleep, she just WANTS me. So, if she wakes up calling my name I tell her everything is fine just go back to sleep and most of the time that works. (of course I can do this and not get out of bed as her bed is in my room)

I hope my story helps. What I keep realizing with these struggles is the more I worry and struggle, the worse it is. I was so concerned she'd never get out of my bed that when it happened and was so easy I had to kick myself a bit.

Also one more thing, you have to make sure to let your child know who is in charge, believe me I am no bully and practice attatchment parenting but let your kids know that you understand that they may want you but don't need you. If it takes a few sleepless nights of constantly putting them back in their room, then it'll be worth it. Remember, this too shall pass.

Melissa - posted on 08/06/2009

We co slept with our daughter until she was about 2 1/2...then we introduced a big girl bed "next" to our bed....when she got comfortable with that, we moved her bed into her room, and I would lay there until she fell asleep, if she would wake, I would lay with her until she fell asleep...slowly start inching your way out of the room all together. My daughter has had a GREAT experience tranistioning into her own bed. I COULD not be one of those mom's who let baby cry it out, and so I certainly couldn't do that as she got older....that being said if you are like me, it is a "commitment" that you have to follow through.... It will all work out, they don't sleep in your bed forever

Catherine - posted on 08/06/2009

My daughter co-slept with us off and on, but I found it hard to get a deep sleep with her hot and squirmy little body next to mine, so we persevered and got her to sleep in her crib. That went well for a long time; we transfered her to a bed around 2 1/2 years, and she liked it and would sleep on her own through the night. Until one night a rat appeared in our house, and my husband didn't want her to sleep alone until we caught it. So, two weeks later, after it was gone, we tried to get her back into her own bed... Ha! She would fall asleep there, sure, but try keeping her there all night. You know, it was four years before she stopped getting out of her bed in the middle of the night, and I think there were three factors that led to that; we moved, put her in a new loft bed, and told her that, if she got out of bed in the middle of the night, she wouldn't be able to do things like have play dates with certain friends. But that only worked because she was old enough to understand bargaining. The truth is, kids will push as far as they can to get what they want, and you as a parent have to be strong and consistent and always, always, always follow through.

Jess - posted on 08/06/2009

We have a whole bedtime routine. Bath, breathing treatment, bedtime story. On Friday night we have Mommy Deedee movie night where we have a special movie snack and stay up late watching a movie. Most times we both sleep in my bed but that's out special night. I work and go to school so I don't mind the extra time I get by her sleeping with me. Some nights she climbs in bed with me around 5 or 6 and I don't mind terribly...accept on the nights she peed her bed and is looking for dry sheets lol. Just hang in there and reinforce how cool it is to be in a big kid bed. A routine with falling asleep in the bed may help too. Good luck.

Char - posted on 08/06/2009

What you do is moms, get his/her favorite stuffed animal or dolly, tell them that someone needs them to sleep with, tuck them both in and kiss them both good night. And if its a bad dream, read a nice bed time story and have a night light in the room.

Hope this works out for you all!

Tara - posted on 08/06/2009

We had this problem, I didn't think my son would EVER sleep in his own bed! We ended up having to change part of his bedtime routine. We gave him his bath, put on his jammies and grabbed a stack of books. For the first couple of nights, we had to read for a long time, but he eventually fell asleep. Then we snuggled him in with stuffed animals. Happy to report that now it takes about two stories, then lights out. Also, limit the drinks after the bath. This will solve some of the 'Mommy, I have to go potty!'

Jan - posted on 08/05/2009

Let her jump in and when she goes back to sleep trasport her back to her bed. You keep doing this untill she feels safe to wake up in her own room.

Kappy - posted on 08/05/2009

We used a reward system to get our son to stay in his bed. Every night that he stayed in bed and did not come into our room, he got to go into our guest room and choose a REALLY GREAT toy off the guest room bed the next morning. We would take him in there just before bed and let him look over the toys, then into bed. Read a story, turn on some soft music (unidentifed noises are very scary to little kids, music covers those noises), sit for 3 songs, then out with the hall light on so there is light coming from under the door.
Over time, the rewards get less fantastic, but choose really awesome ones and have two weeks worth of great ones laid out on the bed for her. She can even help you choose them at the store, if you want.

Good luck to you! Remember, if she gets up during the night, and comes into your room while you are asleep, just take her back into her room no matter how tired you are. You could maybe tell her that you won't count this as "getting out of bed" because daddy didn't wake up, but she'll have to go back to sleep right away. You will only stay for one song. If she gets up again tonight - that's no toy. That will probably do it for that night.

It's worth a try!!! Worked for us - and he was a tough one.

Franca-Nicole - posted on 08/05/2009

My husband actually came up with a very neat idea and it has worked for us. Try giving them a special stuffed toy (bear, bunny or whatever) and he told her that this was her special friend and it will keep her safe from everything. Not saying it works for everyone but worth a shot. Her Teddy Bears name is Jodi and she still sleeps with him. (she is now 7). Good Luck

Rachel - posted on 08/05/2009

We had the same problem with our eldest. Just before our second child was born we struggled to get him to sleep in his own room even during nap time. I have trouble sleeping with the kids in the bed so I was exhausted. Someone suggested that we get him used to his room by sitting in there with him while he was trying to go to sleep. We weren't to pay him any attention though and not even make eye contact. After a while he would relax and then just before he fell asleep we would leave the room so he was going to sleep by himself. At the beginning he would often get unsettled again as soon as we left the room so we would return but after a while he got used to it and within a few weeks we were able to put him in his bed and leave him to get to sleep by himself. When our second child was about 6 months ols the boys moved into the same room and have shared ever since (they are now 8 and 10). They are both very good sleepers and I also get some sleep. I still love that they come in to our bed in the morning for a cuddle though. Not long and I'm sure that will change, hopefully not too soon though.
The other thing to remember is that what works for one family may not work for another and we all need to do what is right for us. Good luck......

Jane - posted on 08/05/2009

my 2 year old did regress when we had our baby but we got back on track. i think it's natural, they see all of this attention and closeness and want to be a part of it again. but once the newborn cry sets in, i think they want the peace of their routine again. if you have PBS Sprout, the "Pajanamals" was key in getting my daughter's routine down and we still watch it On Demand every night. it's our special little time and we sing the songs at naptime and when we're reading her books at bedtime.



we're such a cuddle-bug family that i would love to co-sleep but it doesn't work out for our family. my husband is too deep a sleeper coupled w/his big rollovers that all i do is spend the night running interferrence and worrying.

Jenni - posted on 08/04/2009

Yeah Vicky, judgmental much? You do realize there is a whole movement for co-sleeping. Just as people are starting to move back to breastfeeding as healthier and more natural for babies. So too are people realizing that co-sleeping (done properly) can be healthier and make a happier baby. Look up Dr. Sears.

I understand if you personally don't want to co-sleep, but it's not bad for kids. It's proven to make more independent, trusting children because they're parented and secure during the night as well as the day.

I co-sleep with both of my kids and they are great sleepers and very happy, smart, friendly, well behaved children.

Jennifer - posted on 08/04/2009

With Conner, I got him to sleep in his bed by making sure he fell asleep in his bed. I think it freaked him out when he fell asleep with me, then woke up in a dark room. So, what I did was I got a nightlight for the hall (that kind of lights up his bedroom a very little) and one for in his bedroom (I did not leave it on all night). I put him in his bed and sat in a chair next to his bed and read him a book or two until he fell asleep. Then I would turn off the nightlight in the room and sit for a few minutes to make sure he was asleep, then I would leave and go to bed or shut his door and go watch TV. Also, I put a baby gate in his doorway so that if he does get up in the middle of the night he can't leave his bedroom, then we go in there, put him back in bed, and sit there in the dark with him for a few minutes till he falls back to sleep. This worked right away for Conner, and he only got up a few times over the first month. Hope this helps! See you soon.

Vicky - posted on 08/04/2009

Right ok...... i know alot of mothers who let their child sleep in their bed......what are you all thinking????? PLease do not think Im being rude, I just cant understand y you all do it. I love my kids alot but even when babies, they never never slept with my in bed. I think its dangerous as babies, and you make a rod for your own backs!!!!! What you do from day one will and does affect the toddler and then school years.

As for redeeming the situation, get her into a routine.....dont let her fall asleep on the sofa with you because it is causing her to have broken sleep by her waking herself up. She could be having bad dreams but I personnally doubt it, shes too young for anything to play on her mind. Put her in her own bed every night at a set time, you have to stick at it and when she gets up, put her straight back in bed!!!!!

Also for Jenn Rawlines LeBlanc, time for a fresh approach when baby comes.......dont get into the same habits with this one as you have with your son and follow same advice for your son now before baby comes.

Laura - posted on 08/04/2009

I have the exact same problem too....but then so do a lot of other people i no with 2 year olds....i think its the whole comfort of fallin asleep with u and then wakin up with no one there.its a hard one but think we are gonna have to persivere!!!

Jane - posted on 08/04/2009

bath, book, bed. she's freaked out b/c she feel asleep in one place and wakes up in another w/out the coziness of you two there.

she needs a routine that ends w/her in her bed awake every night. my daughter and i have the same routine, so much so that she actually kicks my husband out of her room at night if he tries to join in on it or she'll come downstairs and get me to come in her room if he attempts to put her to bed.

same thing every night. the time doesn't matter so much as the routine. kids need dependabilty and the end of their day is when they need to know that everything will be okay, everything will be the same. my daughter is 2 also, so she wakes up once or twice during the night, i tell her when we're reading her books that if she wakes up, i won't be there and all she needs to do if she needs something is to call for me and then i mimic how she would need to do it. this way she doesn't whine and cry and wake up her little sister. it works. just stick w/it. once she gets into the routine, she will love it and look forward to it. she loves picking out the books we'll read and we have one book that we always read as our last book. she'll probably want to read 18 books the first few nights, then you have to just give her a choice of a few. instead of the couch, you three cuddle up and read her a book in her bed. i sometimes fall alseep next to her and then go get in our bed. i always leave her door open a little bit so that she can come and get us if she needs us.

i also hate not sleeping w/her but for our family, it's just better for everyone that we're in our own beds. i would love a family bed, but it just doesn't work for us.

good luck and sweet dreams!

Sandy - posted on 08/03/2009

You have two choices...1. just give it up for right now and let her sleep with you for now if you don't care or 2) You put her in her bed, not on the couch after a routine like brushing teeth, reading a book etc.. then you say goodnight and close the door and you do not go in and if she gets out you put her back EVERY time. It will only take a few days.

Jenn - posted on 08/03/2009

Thank you...another thing i am in the process of moving to an new apt..so that seems like it could be a good oppertunity to involve him in decorating his room etc, however at the same time i am worried that a whole new house on top of it will make him more resistant to change then ever...I am due in oct with a baby girl who will be sharing our room in her bassinet so i want to get it at least established before her birth s he doesnt feell like shes taking his place...Thanks for the tips though..and sorry Holly i am stealing ur question answers...im just desperate:)

Christy - posted on 08/03/2009

We co-slept with our first ds until he was 10 months (He's now 6.5 y/o).Then we did like you - let him fall asleep on dh and transfer to his bed. We learned the hard way that you really need to "begin as you mean to continue". A lovely saying that means your child will require you to keep doing whatever it is that you started doing that your child likes - UNTIL you take great pains to change it. We got my ds1 to sleep in his own bed by sheer persistence. We put him in his own bed at bedtime and (dh or) I would lay in his bed until he fell asleep. After a couple weeks I started leaving the room when I felt him get drowsy but still awake. I'd tell him I needed to feed the cats or use the bathroom, etc... and that I would check on him after 2 mins and I did. Then I gradually extended the time until it got to the point that he fell asleep without me in there - usually after I checked on him (sometimes up to three times a night - whatever it took for him to feel safe and to know I would be there if he needed me ). If he woke up in the night, dh or I would lay in his bed with him until someone fell asleep. DH and I both have spent many a night in ds1's bed. The whole process took about 4 weeks or so but dh and I both were committed that ds1 was staying in his bed. It was hard but we all slept better w/o him in our bed and him sleeping through the night.



Good luck and congratulations on the new babe, Jenn!!!

Roxann - posted on 08/03/2009

Try playing some soft music every night with like the ocean cd's they have or what I use for my Son for a while now is listening to bible stories on cd quietly in his room.Sometimes you may have to lay with them in there bed instead of yours!!!

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Jenni - posted on 08/03/2009

I've read that if you get a twin mattress and put it on the ground (so they won't fall far if they roll out of it) in your bedroom (if possible) that way you can lay down with them until they fall asleep, but then get up and sleep in your own bed. That way they are still in the room with mom and dad and it's less scary.

The key is getting them to fall asleep in the bed alone. They're probably going to wake up and get in bed with you for a while until they get more used to sleeping alone. You can either let them get in bed with you at first or put them back to bed every time they get up. If you start putting them in their own bed when they get up in the middle of the night though you have to do it every time and be consistent.

I've also read about using rewards for nights they sleep the whole night in their own bed. Then for every 2 nights, then every 4 nights and so on. Letting them pick out their own bed/ sheets etc also seems to help.

All of this is stuff I've read about though. My 2 1/2 yr old son co-sleeps with us and I've been debating about trying to get him to sleep alone more. But it really doesn't bother us, so I figure why fix what's not broke. He'll get out of our bed eventually. And Jenn we have our 2 yr old and our 9 month old in bed with us, so it is doable. Course we have a king size for just that reason, lol. I've read stuff by Dr' Sears (who really advocates co-sleeping) about having several kids in bed with mom and dad. You just kind have to have Mom or Dad separate the older kid from the baby.

Stacey - posted on 08/03/2009

Hi guys, I had different sleep problems with my 2 as babies, until I found a great book - "Save our Sleep" by Tizzie Hall, I would reccomend it to anyone, it certainly saved our sleep (& sanity). The problem I see with what you are doing is, your child is falling asleep in one place and waking up in a totally different place. Imagine if you woke up in a different place, not knowing how you got there. So, I think the key here is for you to make sure they go to sleep where you intend for them to wake up, ideally their own bed. It will take a few nights atleast of persevering with this, and you will need to continue to put them back in their own bed 100 times if that's what it takes for them to realise what they need to do & that they will not break you. Or you could try sitting next to their bed while they fall asleep (lights off & try to avoid eye contact, dont talk, pay them as little attention as possible) if they get out of bed, put them back without saying anything. After a few night, move a few steps away from them & closer to the door. Then a few night later, move another few steps away, until you are in the doorway, then just outside, etc. Hope that helps, good luck, the key is PERSISTENCE. Also, you should set a time for bed (7:00pm works the best) and stick to this bedtime, routines such as a story in bed before going to sleep, and having something like a favourite stuffed toy to cuddle (you could even walk around with it in your top for a few hrs so it smells like you) My 2 1/2 year old Son sleeps 7pm - 7am right through the night in his own bed since about 10 months, and my 10 month old daughter sleeps the same since 3 months old. But trust me, they weren't always like this.

Jenn - posted on 08/03/2009

Ya getting him to fall asleep in his own bed is a problem in itself..he simply will not no matter how tired he is...and forget crying himself to sleep (which i hate ne ways but have tried) cuuz hes old enuff to simply get up and get out of his bed as opposed to lay there and cry...i mean i cant lock him out of my room and honestly i am so tired from being 7 mths pregnant that its just easier right now to let him sleep in my bed..but i kno its not gonna work once the new baby comes..i dont want him to feel the baby is taking his place either as she will be sharing our room in her bassinet..im at a loss for solutions

Kim - posted on 08/03/2009

We were just in this boat with our 3 year old, we had baby #2 in Feb and he slept with us until Jan. We re-did his room. We gave him a color wheel of paint (you can take her to home depot) and we let him pick out any color he wanted. then any theme. He wanted Cars, so we got some fatheads for the walls and got a solid comforter and printed sheets so it was not to over done and we could change it. It was also cost effective since we only paid about $30.00 for the sheet set and 90 for the fatheads. The key was to making him decide and making it his own, he loves it and only comes in our room now when he is scared, we also got a nightlight for him and a motion sensored night light for the hallway. It might be worth a try, we also changed the routine. Teeth, 2 stories then lights out, we would tell him we would check on him and we did every few minutes for the first few nights until he fell asleep. It takes a little work but as long as they know you are there and checking on them they have that security. Good luck

Shanel - posted on 08/03/2009

Try spending more time in the room during the day to encourge familiarity. Try adding gloww in the dark stars or other friendly shapes all over the room and talk about what they are looking at, perhapes talk about how all of their dolls and blankets are going to keep them safe and warm. we got a turtle for our sons room that has constilations cut into the back and at night it lights up that was a very helpful tool for us. our two and a half year old sleeps in the same room as his 10 month old brother. and he does ask for his brother to sleep in the crib if he is not in there already. We also kiss and hugg each one of his stuffed animals and say good night to them also. I think this helps him feel that he is not alone. our only problem now is getting his to sleep in his bed instead of on the floor. but this is much better then sleeping in my bed. I hope this helps, and would be happy to answer any further questions!

Kate - posted on 08/03/2009

Hi ladies, have you persevered with set bedtime routines? I read somewhere about bedtime "triggers" and I have to say it's worked for both my oldest. Claire has been in a bed since 18 months, but we used to do this with her when she was still in her cot too (she's now 2 and 1 month). It can be whatever you like, as long as it's consistent every night. We picked a time frame (ie between 7pm & 7.30pm) and we tell her that it's bed time soon, then we brush teeth, get her a milk bottle (need to break that one!), tuck her in, kisses and good night. You can use other triggers - bath time right before hand / massage / story etc - whatever you can manage to do consistently. If she gets up we put her back in her bed, kisses, hand bottle back (if not finished), goodnight again "time for sleep". We'll do this as many times as she gets up. To begin with she would get up for the next two hours, now she might get up one to three times if she's in a stubborn mood, but most nights, not at all. I do the same routine with her during the day around 10.30am - 11am (minus the teeth brushing) and again, just pop her back if she gets up. We also put her back in her own bed if she wakes at all through the night as I am breast-feeding a 4 mth old who is co-sleeping. :-) Best of luck ladies!

Megan - posted on 08/03/2009

My 2 and 1/2 year old daughter does the same thing! Drives me crazy i have no idea how to get her to sleep in her own bed, nothing that i try seems to work...

Emily - posted on 08/03/2009

I believe the problem is your child isnt falling asleep in her own bed. I know it's hard, but the falling asleep on the couch and waking in her own bed hours later can be scarey for her. She is probably wondering "how did I get here" and she gets up and goes to look for mom and dad. My doctor told me that children need to learn how to fall asleep on their own, in their own bed/crib, so that if they wake up in the middle of the night they will be able to get themselves back to sleep without need their parents to soothe them. I wish I had ideas on "how" to get her in bed in the first place! Good luck to you!

Jenn - posted on 08/03/2009

Ya my biggest fear is im gonna have like four in a bed...lol..i dont want cody my son to feel like the baby is taking his place wth mom and dad in our room, but at the same time it is too dangerous to have a two and half yr old laying in bed with a newborn..which im sure she will sleep in our bed occasionally after those late night breastfeedings...

Lindsey - posted on 08/03/2009

I am kinda in the same boat. My daughter only wants to sleep in our bed when her dad is home every other week (he lets her sleep with us). When he leaves she askes to sleep in my bed. I put her in her bed and it is a fight but around 1 or 2 in the morning she comes to my room and gets into bed with me. It makes me so mad. I wanted to break her (or her dad) by thee time our new baby comes but that is not going to happen since i am going in to have her wednesday. Hopefully the new baby wont make it worse.

Jenn - posted on 08/03/2009

I have the EXACT same problem with our 2 and half yr old son and i need advice asap cuz i have a baby coming in 2 mths that will be sharing our room with us...not the bed but her crib will be in our room..soo i need to get our son sleeping in his bed..and nothing seems to work, i try laying with him in his bed, everything suggested but he will simply wake up realize hes not in our bed and come into ours...He always passes out on the couch but its lie as soon as i lay hiim in his bed he wakes up, or soon after..Im lost at what to and desperate!!!