How many children do you think that a family should have?

Sherri - posted on 04/29/2012

I think as many children as a family wants is the right number to have. I personally have 4 children and that ended up being the perfect number of children for us.

Janice - posted on 04/29/2012

Its a personal choice. I have 2 young children and I hope one day we will be financially stable enough to have one more. Some people only have 1 and that's fine and some people have 6 and that's fine too.

Yvonne - posted on 04/29/2012

We have two children, a boy and a girl, and even though I have always wanted three we just can not afford it and be able to go on vacations, etc., afford childcare or summer camps, and even buy a larger vehicle with three. My husband also did mot want more than one or two kids. The economy and being responsible has prohibited us from enjoying three, however I would never have settled for just one. I am one of two kids and have always wished my parents had at least one more:) My brother and i are not close! Its whatever you feel comfortable with I think. If you can comfortably support and have time for four or five kids go for it! As for an only I think they probably miss out on a lot of great life and family experiences, but they also can get the attention and time with parents and grandparents that siblings can not.

Jamie - posted on 04/29/2012

For me, it's always been about balance. My husband and I are musicians (teachers as well as performers), and wanted to be able to give our children what they needed (not just financially, but time & energy) while still being able to use & improve our God-given musical talents. We've raised a son and a daughter--and that is PERFECT for us! However, I do know many happily-married couples who are childfree by choice; I also know quite a few happy large families (4 children or more). Family size is a very personal, individual decision!

Anna - posted on 04/29/2012

As many as they want and can afford to take care of.

Sandra - posted on 04/29/2012

Unfortunately at this point I believe a family should not have more then 2 children,ideally one. I was for exp, a single child. There are 10 billion people on the planet and at this rate we already need 1.5 Earth to sustain this growth. The stats are scary of the human footprint people have, because of the rising population: there simply will not be enough resources and food by 2030. Sometimes I look at my two girls and worry about the world they will live in

So I would say, do it for your children: it is our responsability. Maybe think adoption if you want more?

Jennie - posted on 04/29/2012

There is a LOT of judgement about having just 1 child. I have just 1, I am happy with just 1, I have a lot of friends that have just 1 and they all play well with each other, but there's nothing more my child loves than to hang out with mummy and play games, she's well adjusted, shares well, and has excellent manners.

I grew up with 3 other siblings, 1 still lived at home and I hated all of them, it wasn't until later on in life that I finally started to get along with them. My husband is the youngest of 3 boys and gets along really well with them, but still doesn't feel the "urge" to enlarge our family either.

So, please, stop judging on the temprement of a just just because she doesn't have siblings. I would resent having to have more children just so my daughter can have siblings.

Jennifer - posted on 04/28/2012

Most countries are reproducing too slowly; for example, Russia is expected to be in serious crisis in the next few years because their reproduction rate is so low. I think that population has nothing to do with it, personally, and it's no one's business how many you have. Children are an amazing blessing! We should be thankful for children, not calling people "selfish" for having large families. We have a big family and my husband works really hard to provide for us.

Deanna - posted on 04/28/2012

I think that is something that can only be decided by each family. I grew up in a family with only 2 kids - and that was what my parents felt was best and right for our family. My husband and I now have 5 children and while some people think we are crazy to have so many, I can't imagine our family without any of them. I think that a big family is good for some people and a small family is good for others, but just like there is no one perfect way for a person to look or be, there is no one perfect size for a family to be.

Denise - posted on 04/28/2012

I always wanted 2 kids since the age of 5 and I have 2 kids a girl and a boy, now I know why this was such a big deal to me...I also have a darling grandbaby that is mostly my mine to love and raise as well, who blessed my life at moms lovely age of 15.

Stifler's - posted on 04/28/2012

People in the past had a lot of children so at least 1 would make it to adulthood. They were also like Pamela said, an investment. Someone to work on the farm or take over the family business.

Stifler's - posted on 04/28/2012

family of 4 meaning 2 kids 2 adults. "family with a heap of kids" meaning like Duggars. For people who will misconstrue my post as "judging".

Stifler's - posted on 04/28/2012

I like my small family of 4. I don't want anymore. I don't care how many kids others have but I question how people with a heap of kids have time for them all.

Nicole - posted on 04/28/2012

Family size is a matter of personal preference and responsible decision making! While most people can never "afford" children, can you provide diapers, formula, baby food...and later school clothes and three pairs of shoes per year and winter coats and TONS of food and snacks.... It is hard to judge! I have always wanted a larger family, and we have four children. Times do get tough, and money gets tight, and I'm glad that we didn't have any more, but on the other hand it still makes me cry when I think about not having any more children! Maybe rather than planning a family you should take it one child at a time, see how things are going, and then decide whether you would like another one! Things change so fast, so don't make any rash decisions, such as getting your tubes tied after having only one. I actually wanted to have a tubal after my third child, and I am SO glad that I didn't, because I was blessed with one more, who is the glue that holds my heart together!

Johnny - posted on 04/28/2012

I do not believe that it is moral from an ecological standpoint for any couple to have more than two children. One each. Basic replacement. This applies to the entire globe. I love kids too much to want to really think about how things will be for them as we continue the massive depletion of fresh water resources and usable arable land stock. Not to mention the depletion of everything else from minerals to trees to fuel sources along with less habitable land masses due to rising sea levels.



If we had enough of everything to go around, and no concerns about this for the future, I wouldn't care how many kids people have. It would be lovely to say, "choose to have the right number for you". But the earth is a mess and it is about far more than personal choice and personal resources. Our kids will be the ones paying a hefty price for not controlling our birth rates carefully.

Elaine - posted on 04/28/2012

It is good to have whatever number of children you want (as long as you can afford them and properly care for them). It is a simple matter of personal preference and personal resources. A "good" family has nothing to do with size.

Lo - posted on 04/28/2012

what feels right for your family! i knew i didn't want more than one child so i stopped there. why bring children into the world if you don't want them. i would hear over and over how my son wouldn't learn socialization skills by being an only child, which is bunch of bull. children learn what they live and they learn their socialization skills by living within the family. my son learned sharing, kindness, compassion etc because that's how we lived and that's how we raised him. matter of fact, when my son was little (he's 21 now) he shared better than some of his peers who came from big families. i'd watch his friends and their siblings; share? they were always fighting each other, to get a piece of the pie, so to speak. again, do what's right for you.

Pamela - posted on 04/28/2012

In the past larger families were common as there were far more farmers than today. The more children, the more hands to help work the farm. This is still the case, somewhat, in other countries.

My suggestion is that you and your husband/mate/partner sit down and discuss the situation and decide for yourselves. You can elicit the opinion of others if you wish, but the decision should ultimately be made by the two of you as you will be creating the children.

Many people decide according to their financial situation. I would never do that because I believe that abundance is for all of us and simply takes our focus to bring it into our own lives. I am extremely happy that I didn't base my children on "what I thought we could afford", but rather they happened as a result of my husband and I mating.

I have a sister-in-law who comes from a family of ten children. My own family had four. To date I have 3. It's up to you and yours. Besides, it's best to LIVE IN THE PRESENT MOMENT!!! Why? Because Man Plans and God Laughs!!!! LOL!!!

Kisha - posted on 04/28/2012

I HAVE SIX AND I THINK THE BETTER THE BETTER BECAUSE THEY TEACH EACH OTHER,PLAY WITH EACH OTHER AND DONT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT PARTIES AND BBQ CAUSE WE MAKE THE EVENT SO EVERYONE WANT US TO COME TO HAVE FUN.MY KIDS DO HOMEWORK TOGETHER ,PROJECTS TOGETHER, I LOVE MY KIDS

Fiona - posted on 04/28/2012

I think it depends on each family. We have an only child and that works because my husband grew up in a VERY dysfunctional family and felt like he might only be able to handle parenting one. (He is a great dad, btw.)



I do think it's irresponsible to have a ton of children (even if you can support them) because of overpopulation. I know people will flame me for that, but that's how I feel. My cousin has nine (and may even have more) and I feel like that's extreme. To each her own!

Elfrieda - posted on 04/28/2012

I think 1 works for some families, but I think it's a little sad for the child unless they have close cousins or something like that. I think that if you have too many, there isn't enough attention per child from the parents. I have one sister and lots of cousins, and I still felt a bit lonely, like "there's only two of us - if one of us dies that'll mean the other one will be the only one like her!" I was and am very close to my sister and I feel lucky to have her, we fought about things but never really had sibling rivalry. I would not have done well as an only.



My husband is child 6 of 8, and although of course he'd never wish his siblings away, they kind of raised each other instead of getting strong guidance from their parents. So we're hoping to have more than 2 but less than 8!



Right now I am pregnant with child #2, and I think we might be able to have one more, maybe possibly 2 more before we'd better stop before we get too old. I would like 4 kids, I think. 5 sounds like a cheerful family, but it's not for us.



Oh, and my mom has always said, "Never set up a family that has 3 sisters. Promise me that if you have 3 girls you'll keep going." LOL. She and her 2 sisters had a constant loyalty shift thing going on where one of them was always out of the loop. My cousin (who also is one of 3 girls) has said the same thing.



The reality is that every family is different, and they develop to suit their situation. Some people are told they can't have kids, then suddenly there is a surprise, and of course that child is an only. It's not the end of the world. And when a child who grew up oldest of a pack of 9 escapes into the real world, she'll have done more work than she deserved, but there's no real harm in that, either. Each child will have things that harmed and helped them, and sometimes situations will do both. Like an only child might be lonely and smothered with parental attention, but it taught them how to focus on a project and be ambitious. And a child from a large family might feel a bit personally neglected, but it taught them how to be part of a team and be responsible.

Michelle - posted on 04/28/2012

Kelly that is great that you have 8 children. I have 6. 1 girl and 5 boys. I wouldn't give the world for them. My sister has 8 and 1 on the way.

Kelly - posted on 04/28/2012

I have 8 children I find it very easy with the more I've had they all look after each other I could never imagine life with just 1

Kelly - posted on 04/28/2012

I have 8 children I find it very easy with the more I've had they all look after each other I could never imagine life with just 1

Louise - posted on 04/28/2012

I think it a personal choice, most people have two if they have a boy and a girl and those that have two of the same sex seem to have three. I had two sons in my twenties and could not afford at the time to raise any more and still do the things I wanted to do as a family. I always wanted another baby and 15 years later I did and thankfully it was the little girl I had always wanted. Circumstances change your perseption of family. In my late 30's I was financially secure and ready to raise another child.

I have had experience of raising two together and now my daughter as a only child really as her brothers are 21 and 18. I have to say just having the one is harder work than the two, as she wants me to play with her all the time and take her places. I am her only play mate when in the house and it is exhausting!

Liz - posted on 04/27/2012

It is sad that many families depend on welfare to take care of their children, and then have more children because that is the only way to increase their benefits. If parents are able to financially, emotionally, lovingly, and physically supprt having several children, then who is anyone else to argue? I grew up as an only child and knew I never wanted to have just one. I didn't think it was fair. I thought a boy and a girl would be nice. Well, 3 boys later...haha. Anyway, I did get my girl after that, but I would like for her to have a sister.

Amanda - posted on 04/27/2012

I think it's a personal choice for each family. If you want a large family then go for it as long as you have the means to take care of them all.
I personally always wanted 2 until I had my son and we decided he was enough for us. We wanted to be able to give him everything we could. Then we had my daughter, who was an oops baby and a big surprise.
For us now, 2 is the perfect number. But each to their own

Sarah - posted on 04/27/2012

IMO, 3 would be ideal. I think it's nice for people to have a sibling though, so at least 2. There is something so special about sibling relationships that you can't get from anyone else. I would be lost without my sisters.

Brianna - posted on 04/27/2012

i like bigger familys i mean its all about personal choice but i like anywhere between 2 to 4 kids :)

Michelle - posted on 04/27/2012

kimberly... i liked that... i have one and then comes another ooops.. hope it don't make you mad, but that made me laugh.congrats on the new family member to be and good luck to you!

Bonnie - posted on 04/27/2012

I think two or three is a good number. Two so that the first child has a sibling. Some parents only want one. There is nothing wrong with it, it's a preference.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/27/2012

There are pros and cons to both. With a single child, you can devote all your time with that one kid, which can be wonderful, but can also make for a spoiled self righteous child, and an adult that does not deal well with the realities of disappointment (my experience that I have seen). Larger families are great because there is more love to spread. Also, the older ones can help care for the younger ones....but then again no one really gets the attention that they need or deserve. Also, financially speaking it is difficult. So, all my opinion. But 1-3 children is a good amount in my opinion.

Kimberly - posted on 04/27/2012

I think the size of the family depends on how many children the parents want to have and if they can afford to raise them and provide a good life, If you can only have one thats great but if you can have five good on ya. I personally was all set to have just one as this would be easier for myself but we are having an opps! So now we will have two kids and that is it, I never wanted a big family as I want to be able to afford the children I have and give them oppertunities I didnt have. All my family lives overseas and I would never be able to go home if I had five kids!!!

~♥Little Miss - posted on 04/27/2012

My husbands aunts families are ALL big. Meaning no less than 5, and I think the most has 12. Of course this was back in the day where big families were more common. His parents only had 3, one of which died as a baby. They would have had many, but they started late in life. I only wanted one EVER (really never wanted kids but when I met him that changed), but after my first I started wanting a second. We have 1 boy 1 girl. I am done. So is he. He loves his big family, so do I, but it is not for us.

Now a days, I do honestly think it is a bit selfish to have large families like I have previously mentioned. Our resources are running low, and life is expensive enough. There are foster homes filled with children in need of a loving home. This is my own personal opinion, but I think having large families now is a bit taboo.