I can't get him out of my head!!

Samantha - posted on 02/02/2010

make yourself real busy take up a gym or go for walks the excersize is good and gives you an out sound weird but it does help you may need to see your gp you might have mild depression and with help you will be ok
i ve been there and i think am ok now

Jennifer - posted on 02/02/2010

As most mom's have already stated - time heals all wounds. I know that's probably not what you want to hear tho. I know how hard this can be...I'm in a bit of a similar situation - I had my bags packed and a plane ticket bought and a relative shot me down, so so far I have stayed with the man in my life. I commend you for being so brave - remember that - you have taken a great, huge step. You should be proud of yourself, especially if you know your son is happier and better off so far. Some things that help me, whenever I've broken up a relationship, (before baby came along) is to do a complete make over - dye your hair, get your nails done, buy a cute outfit, set some weight loss goals whatever - if you can make yourself feel good, and you do some things to get your mind off the heavier stuff, it can work amazingly. Best of luck - keep on being strong!!!

Melanie - posted on 02/02/2010

I had this problem when I split up with my ex. He ran off with my best friend, so I lost both of them at the same time and had absolutely no one to talk to about it. A trick I used was I rented a bunch of seasons of One Tree Hill and the OC. I watched one episode after another, never left the couch (except to pee), and never changed out of my pj's. I laughed, I cried, but most importantly, I healed. So my advice is this...find a show that you have never seen before (preferably with hot guys in it, lol) and heal. You will find that instead of thinking about him, you will think about all the possibilities of your (and your sons) future without him. I'm sure you have heard this several times, but time will heal your wounds.

Ester - posted on 02/02/2010

out of your head real fast! never. the only thing that takes that is TIME. Time heals everything. go out do things to keep u r mind busy. ask yourself is everything better now? if u r answer is yes, then stand strong ask God to give you the strength it works TRUST ME.....

Carrie - posted on 02/02/2010

It just takes time I am sure, just don't try to fill your emptiness with attention from another guys because that will just cause more problems . Time is probably the the only thing that will help. Just try to remember why you left , your son i am sure is the reason you had him leave, its best for him, it would be worse for your son for him to come back if he's just gonna have to leave again. I didn't see your previous post so i don't know what happened but if you kicked him out for wrong doing and the betterment of your family(you and son) then you did right, the right decision doesn't always feel right. Just don't dwell on it change your mind when it leads down the sad road, Be a strong women (if he was really harmful for you and the boy in any aspect) Not a weak one.

Kirsty - posted on 02/02/2010

you dont have to be strong all the time :)
if your son is happier then you know you have done right my your little family.
Congratulations on being so brave.
Nothing anyone on here can say to make you feel better immediately (although we wish that we can cure you) but know that there are many people feeling for you and your situation.
I dont know if this helps but I have viewd my past long relationships as a death and treated them as such. This advice may not help because your baby's daddy will be in your life, but there is a little rule I remember. for every year you were together, avoid all contact for a month.
so I was with my ex for 6 years and had no contact what so ever for 6 months and moving on was so much easier for me.
Good luck

Mary - posted on 02/02/2010

HI. I left my sons father when he was just a few months old. He wasnt a good dad and we fought all the time. I focused all my time on my son and had one really good friend. Just keep your self occupied. I started dating my bf a week after i left my baby's father and. My bf has been more to a father then his real father. Im not telling you to date right away start when you feel comfortable. But if you know your son is happier with out him then you know his father not being around is a good thing so just use that as your focus point. You will start to be happier day by day it just takes time.

Courtney - posted on 02/02/2010

the best way to get someone who is bad for you (even if you still love him) out of your head is to focus on why he was bad for you. what did he do to you or your son to make you even consider leaving him? I know thinking negative is not always the best solution but to tell you from personal experience its hard to forget somebdy when all you remember is the good things you're leaving behind. My ex was rude and annoying and lazy, and everyday for months all i could remember was the few sweet things he used to do. then my mom said quit remembering all that crap and start focusing on his bad qualities. I took her advice and everytime i started thinking about him and getting emotional i would think of a specific thing he used to do to piss me off. like forgetting my birthday until the day before and buying me a gift off the clearance rack on his way to take me out for dinner. or just constantly talking about nothing and just lying all the time. at first it makes you mad but believe me its easier to leave someone behind if you start to hate them. you will always be reminded of him because of your son and thank him for that but you do not have to suffer anymore than you already have. He was the problem and you found the solution. Now be strong for you and your's Good luck

Chevelle - posted on 02/02/2010

I think maybe you and your sons father need to talk about it. Try and come to an understanding and compromise with each other. I know that sounds like something a counselor would say but it works. Maybe a little time apart was all that was needed. And if that doesnt work try and spend time with your son. seeing him happy will make you happy.....and btw sometimes everyone deserves a second chance

Christin - posted on 02/02/2010

well i cant say i know how you fill but i can say i know what you mean i dont think it is easy for any one to get the babys dad out of there head but just rember the only thing that matters is your little boy and to make shure he has the best life that you can give him whether that means you have to take dad out of the pic to make you and your son happer. i am married and some times dont fill like it my husdon trys to help but some times maks it worse so i think your probly a pritty shrong girl and it will take time but just look in to your sons eyes and know why you did it for his happens of you son hope i helped a little

Patricia - posted on 02/02/2010

i still from time to time have the same issue... My son does't know his father i left him while i was 3 months pregnant. It was so hard at first but as time went on it got easier. I didn't want to go out with any of my friends until they made me. But keeping your mind busy and having lots of friends and family will help. Trust me and the other ladies it will get easier. Good luck

Alexandra - posted on 02/02/2010

i think that trying to forget is going to make it worse. Confront your feelings. Have a good cry and make peace with your decision. You'll get there sweetie. it takes time to heal, and its important to allow your self that time. You might want to write down all the reasons you made him leave and when you are regretting your decision look at that list and remind yourself that you are an amazing mom.

Emilie - posted on 02/02/2010

Do you have alot of friends? Maybe you need to go out with friends and/or family, just keep yourself surround by people who care about you and want the best for you, and try not to talk about him. I went through a divorce recently and it is hard I know. I don't think I started getting over him until I started dating again. I knew I couldn't go back to him because he was also with somebody else so I had to force myself to get over him.