I cannot get my two year old to go to sleep on her own help me please!!!

Jennifer - posted on 01/28/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Okay I really need alot of advice please!!! Here is the history, when my daughter was born I would always rock her to sleep and lay her in her crib for bed, she always slept in her crib but I didn't lay her down till she was asleep. As she got old enough to stand in her crib if I rocked her to sleep and layed her down and she woke up while I was leaving she would scream until she made herself throwup all over the place until I came back into the room and cleaned her up and rocked her again. Ok we made the mistake of taking her out of the crib and trying a toddler bed that didn't work it was too little for her she would constantly wake herself up so we moved up to a full size bed which she likes. However I stopped rocking her and moved on to lying down with her giving her a bottle of milk and staying in bed with her until she fell asleep. Okay now she is 2 and 1/2 and still drinking a bottle and I am still laying with her until she falls asleep!!! And sometimes that doesn't happen!!! If I leave her in her bed she gets up and follows me out then I put her back in her bed and it is the same thing. Sooooo my husband started putting her in her bed and sitting beside her playing with her hair till she fell asleep (still with a bottle of milk) it worked a few times and then back fire she was out a bed and the same situation. So finally I resorted to not giving her a nap during the day and then hoping she would fall asleep from exhaustion! And sometimes that doesn't work either. I need helpful tips on getting rid of the bottle and getting her to fall asleep alone without throwing up all over her bed. Please help it is to the point that my husband and I have no alone time together and it is hurting our relationship. I have no time to myself unless I stay up really late and am exhausted the next day. I feel like I need Supernanny and I feel like I have failed at this....

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Jacqueline - posted on 10/29/2010

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Hi lots of parents make the mistake of rocking babies to sleep,,,,it really makes hard work lateron,,,you need to change bedtime routine and it is a routine,,calming down stories books then bath and gentle music and story then music to go to sleep with,,,if they get out of bed you go in and put them right back in and if you have to do this 25 times the first night then so be it,,,the first time you say its bed time now night night and in bed and out of room,,,after that you say nothing just back in bed and out,,,then when they and you are exhausted they will fall assleep,,,the next night won,t be so many times and they will get it by the 3rd or fourth night just stick with it and you will have your nights back again,,,i did this with my 3 children they are all grown up now and have helped lots of parents too,,,,hope this helps Jackie in Cheshire x x

Sophie - posted on 10/27/2010

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Try starting a new routine that you discuss with your daughter before it's time for bed. We use music and a story. Explain that you will read one or two books together at bed time then chose some calm music and play the music after the books. The first few nights lay with her as the music plays but each night choose a shorter time in the music to leave. Our daughter is six and has slept this way since she was a baby. We are trainnig our twin boys (18 months) to fall asleep this way too. she's also old enough to have a favorite stuffed toy or blanket to help her fall asleep, as well. The thing to do is be consistant. if she gets out of bed return her there and stay for shorter periods of time. Have her help with picking the music and stories. Also having a family activity before bed where she feels like she getting your full attention might also help. Good Luck!

Linda - posted on 10/26/2010

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i understand how you feel - sleep deprivation is terrible.

Throw away the bottle and put milk in a sippy cup - my kids still get milk from a cup before bedtime (4 and 6 years old)

As for the lying down, i still lie down with my kids till they fall asleep (not every night as sometimes they are very tired and go quickly to sleep) - i love the cuddles and time with them. I talk softly to them and sing lullabuys and sometimes if I have work to do - I sit on the floor of their bedroom on my laptop computer or a book (with soft lights), not giving them any attention and tell them to go back in bed whenever the get out.

For a few years, my husband and I were wondering about time together but I think the turning point came when we realised we are not a couple anymore and will never get all that time together we used to have (till the kids leave home anyway) and just enjoy the time with your kids !

Sarah - posted on 10/26/2010

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I am in the same boat with my almost 2 yr old.. i wish i had some adivce but nothing is working for us either..

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