I could really use some encouragement!!

Amber - posted on 04/19/2009

YOU HAVE POST PARDUM DEPRESSION! SEE YOUR DOC IMMEDIATELY.

Tami - posted on 04/19/2009

The best encouragment I can give you is to let you know that I will support you through prayer. I am the mother of four wonderful children. All are now wonderful adults! Ages 32, 31. 30. 26.....I can truly tell you that God is the one that gets us through and it is worth every sleepless night, every moment I was at the end of my rope....I learned to hold on to the hand of the one who hung on the cross. He has never let me go. I will pray that the Father of Love will hold you in every trying time and bring you through. Father of Love I ask that you wrap this one that you entrusted your little ones to in your love. Give her wisdom for this journey. Increase her to endure this time and strengthen her as you bring her through this to better days. Encounter her with your love. In Jesus Name

Ashley - posted on 04/19/2009

I know how you feel. When I had my son, who is now 10 months old. I was not working and my husband was. I was up all night with my son and I barely got 10 hrs of sleep a week if I was lucky. My husband was great though, on the weekends he took care of my son and I got to sleep in. I am currently pregnant with our 2nd son due july 3rd. I would say to talk to your husband about how you feel. Let him know that you are drained and that you need some help! You would like at least one day or night by yourself, so you can do whatever makes you happy and you don't have to think about the kids or your husband, just you! It is really hard when one of you is unemployed and you have babies. Money is tight and you only think about money. Talking to your spouse or your friends are the best thing you can do. Seeing a therapist is good too, because they are an outsider that doesn't really know you yet. Sometimes your friends and family can give you good advice but its not always want you should probably do, they are more loving then a stranger will be. Everyone goes through hard times and somehow magically things turn around. You will start to see that dark cloud lift and go away! There were times I didn't know if my husband and I were going to be able to eat, but we made it through and honestly I don't think we would have had we not depended on each other and encouraged each other through it. We became a part couple because of it. Hopefully everything turns out for the best! :)

Erika - posted on 04/18/2009

I'll share my story with you and maybe it will help. 1 week before Christmas this past year, both my husband and I lost our jobs.....with NO notice at all! We have a 7 year old and a 2 year old. To say the least sleep was the LAST thing I could think about. BUT~ we prayed that God would lead us in the right direction and He has. Up until 2 weeks ago, we were still without jobs, and now we are both working full time. We used that time to spend with our kids, making the best of what we had. Now, looking back, I am so greatful to have had that time with my husband and my kids. In the end we drew closer as a family. I KNOW you are exhausted! I sure was. But hang in there. You'll make it through!!!

Ellen - posted on 04/18/2009

its not easy I know but try exercise or do stretching or listen to calming/soothing music... you gonna be okay : )

Katie - posted on 04/18/2009

I can totally relate! I have 2 girls - one 3 and one 6 months so very close in age to your two. My husband was made redundant last year and has been unemployed and it's been a real strain on all of us. Thankfully he has now got some freelance work but it's never certain how regular the work will come in. I'm really sorry to hear about your situation and will try to remember you in my prayers. Do you have close family nearby who can help and give you a break? It's quite normal to forget who you are in all the stress and especially after having a baby - I felt a bit like that after giving birth to my first daughter. It sounds to me that maybe you have a bit of post natal depression so I would advise speaking to your health visitor or someone like that. I really hope things improve for you soon x

Janine - posted on 04/18/2009

know how you feel being a mum i think is the hardest job in the world ask your partner to lok after your kids for a few hours and go to your nearst spiritulist church and let the angels help u find a balance if you cant do that when kids are in bed try laying on your bed quietly and asking for healing and guidence they helped me. if youever get the chance read The Secret it has changed my life so much i can not begin to tell you.

sending love and healing

Monica - posted on 04/18/2009

Pray about it. You have very young children and your husband should either be helping you with the kids and the house or finding work. I know they say there are no jobs, but in reality there are many jobs just not ones people want to settle for. Keep your head up and everything will be okay.

TaRita - posted on 04/18/2009

Hello Erin---I so understand what u mean by not knowing who you are sometimes. I am the single mother of a 5yr old and had to finally just sit my daughter down and make her understand that there are times when Mommy needs "Mommy time!" At first it was hard to enforce this because I was always giving in when she wanted my time. I designated Sunday and Monday as "mommy time-days" so on those days we always do only what I want to do (mostly just resting and doing nothing). Perhaps you can do the same w/ your kids and husband and let him cover the kids on certain days while U just do "whatever!" Also, maybe you can find events in your community/church to attend where they have childcare so that you can enjoy some activities w/ adults and the kids will be taken care of by those you trust. Please try to take some "Erin time" because it's bad to say . . . but if mommy goes down-sometimes the entire household shuts down!!! Keep your head up girl and keep representing for the mamas!

Jeanne - posted on 04/18/2009

Hi there,



I hear you my dear I hear you. I am 39 years old, my daughter is four years old and my son is 16.5 months old and has not slepped through the night in months now because of teething. My husband is employed and he does help with the kids but I take care of all of the kids basic needs. If you can my dear, get someone to babysit for you once a week either for an afternoon, or through the night so you can catch up on some sleep. It sounds like your totally drained and you might have either the baby blues or post-partum depression. Does your hubby offer to help? If he does, take him up on it, even if it is not done "your way" as long as it gets done that is all the should matter to you. And if you can't get someone overnight but they are willing to watch the kids for a few hours during an afternoon, get out of the house and either go get your hair done, go and browse in the mall or just go to the library and pick out some books for yourself. I know it gets frustrating and the more frustrated that you get the harder things seem, but you have to remember if people offer to help, either by cooking a meal, watching the kids or offer to help with the chores around the house, LET THEM!!!! We aren't machines and we need some rest and relaxation sometimes.....you owe it to yourself and your family to take care of yourself before you brake down completely. If it's possible maybe you can join a mother and tots group in your area where you can talk and interact with other women going through the same as you are. I with you luck my dear....and take heart....it will get better...maybe not in the next couple of days....but it will get better.

Kimber - posted on 04/18/2009

Believe me girl, I am right there with you!!! I am a mother of 5, and my husband is out of work. My youngest is 3 and if you want to talk let me know! You and I are going through the same thing, and believe me, venting is exactly what you need to be doing or you will just explode. Your sister in sorrow- Kimber

Cher - posted on 04/18/2009

Hang in there. What you are going through right now may indeed be difficult. But, this moment of struggle for your life will not last forever. You will get through this. And if you feel you need some one to talk to, come talk to me. I would be glad to listen. I have raised my son (as a single parent since he was five). christchild2@yahoo.com. Or go to a local counselor (as others have expressed), Or find a friend in your area who can listen to you vent. The choice is yours. But, do yourself a favor: do not hold this in. When you share your burdens, you will sleep.

Gwen - posted on 04/18/2009

Time out!!! You send kids for tme-outs so why not send yourself on a time-out. Nothing major but just some time alone with your girl-friends or sitting in a library / going to church or playing a game of netball. He's unemployed so can watch the kids once a week for your time-out! My kids are 363 days apart and I nearly lost myself completely. Now I take the time, the kids respect it, and I'm healthier for it.

Sian - posted on 04/18/2009

hi erinn,,, i am a mum of 5,the oldest is 21, the younges is 4, so my house is always mad, Wot works for me is having some ...me time... its a must,

Erica - posted on 04/18/2009

I have been in your shoes several times. My husband was out of work for 7 mos. last yr. and we have 4 kids at home. You wrote how I was feeling too. I don't know if you and your husband are on the same page or not but I would suggest that would be the first place to start. Have a game plan. If he is not working then he needs to be the one taking care of the house and kids. You cannot be supermom, I have been told this same advice many times. Unfortunately my marriage did not work out but that was what was best for my situation. You said you were exhausted spiritually too, does that mean you are a believer? If so, then you and your husband need to be putting God first in everything... prayer, tithing, going to church faithfully, letting the leaders of your church pray over your situation. Don't be too proud to let others know what you are going through so that they can pray for you. Do not underestimate the power of prayer!!

Don't give up, this to shall pass.

Paige - posted on 04/18/2009

I was a mother of two at 30, one was 2 and one was new born. I am now turning 37 and let me tell you, you will survive. I didn't have to worry about my husband losing his job, but I was a stay at home mom and money was tight.



Babies are hard, especially with a toddler running around. Try and get out of the house, take the kids to the park with a friend. Nap when you can, don't worry about the mess or the dishes.



Maybe you have family or friends that can take the kids for an evening. You don't have to go out and spend money, just stay home with your husband and enjoy the quiet, or just sleep.



Take a deep breath and tell yourself, this will pass. Take it one day at a time, try not to worry about the future. I know that is hard, but the more you worry, the more you worry, and that really doesn't accomplish anything. Good luck!

Earlena - posted on 04/17/2009

When you are in such a "giving mode" as well as not to mention nurturing, you tend to lose yourself. It's probably like "Who am I?" "Where am I?" and "What is my name". I remember losing site of "who I was" at your age. It was like I was so consumed with motherhood that I forgot what my identity was. I am just writing you to say... "This too will pass". In these trying times sleep is something that we get interrupted from... TOO! You have a lot going on, but I am praying FOR you and WITH you. Be not discouraged, as remember WHO is in control. We we really and truly give up the commander's seat thinking we have to have all of the answers it is smooth sailing from there. You can't have a testimony without a "test" so find peace in spite of in knowing that so many care about you who don't even know you. Stay encouraged. You are never alone.

Alia - posted on 04/17/2009

Hi Erin. I see you have a ton of support. I just want to commend you for admiting that your at the end of our rope. I'm there too. I know it sounds crazy... but misery really does love company. I have four kids under the age of 5. Everyone says how patient I am and what a wonderful mom I am... and I feel guilty because I feel like I'm losing it. Everyone says I should feel blessed because I have four healthy children, and I do, but I also feel exhausted. I had postpartum depression after my twins were born a year ago, and I am still on the anti depressants. Yes, they help, but does that mean I'm not supposed to feel overwhelmed when my 3 year old jumps on her bed, falls off into a wall, and puts a giant hole in their bedroom wall? I just wanted to cry. Okay, maybe I did. I just feel like I'm stuck in this routine and everyone says to "take some time for yourself". Well, that's kinda of impossible right now. We don't really have the time or the money. I don't know. I guess I'm not being very supportive of your problems am I? I' guess I need to vent to. If you need someone to talk to please feel free. I'd love to listen... and maybe vent to. -Alia

Maria - posted on 04/17/2009

My dear Erin, you have taken a huge step seeking help and reaching out. Thank God that we have acces to one of the positive uses of the Internet. You have a lot of great ideas from all the other moms that have answer your cries for help. I am 47, I have two kids myself but they are adults now. Believe me when I tell you it will get better. My daughter was a baby that cried on a regular basis, my kids are 4 1/2 yrs. apart. God will give you wisdom and the strengh you need. Perhaps your husband can help with the kids while you take a hot bubble bath and relax. Kids grow up way too fast, And before you know it they are grown and you wonder where does years and worries went to. Enjoy them as much as you can. Because they are blessings in our lifes. Just sitting down and "venting out" is helpful. Take some time out for yourself it does not matter if it just an hour a day. Let go and let God. What about your family? Anyways is always good to hear from older moms experiences. I will be here to listen to you if you need me. Take care and take care of those beautiful angels.

Maria

Ronda - posted on 04/17/2009

As a mother of twin boys, wife, homemaker, educator, business owner, and much more, I can relate to your stress. While it does sound like you could use some "me" time or "girlfriend" time, you also could use some "quiet" time with God. I have come to find that He is the only answer to any situation. He nevers gives us more than we can handle. "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me" Phillipians 4:13. When I find myself feeling as you do right now, I always lean on this scripture, along with a few others. If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it! He is faithful. Things will get better, just trust in the Lord and let him guide you. You and your family will be in my prayers. God bless!! XOXO, Ronda

Bonita - posted on 04/17/2009

There are always going to be obstacles to overcome but it is these obstacles which will make you stronger. I just came off unemployment and that was one of the most stressful times of my life but remember to take each day as it comes. Try to focus on the good moments and don't relish on the bad ones. There will be better days so stay strong and don't give up.

Matthea - posted on 04/17/2009

Hitotally understand. I am a mother of 2 boys. After my 2nd who is 8 months I didn't go back to work then in January my husband decided to leave us, two day's after I told him I had post-pardom depression. I have gone back to work part time but I understand your exhaustion! I just keep telling myself it will get better and it could be worse. My husband has not fought me for the kids or the house and I have enough money in the bank to pay the bills for a while. If you ever need to vent I am here, that really helps me sometimes. The one thing I have learned is that mothers are too hard on themselves. I try not to worry about what I can't fix at that exact time and don't worry about tomorrow! It has been a very hard lesson for me but I am learning. Things will get better and you are and will continue to be a fantastic mother!

Jennifer - posted on 04/17/2009

Just remember...This too shall pass. I am a firm believer in this mantra, and I've heard it repetitively (Thanx mom!). Times are hard on all of us right now. We have to stay strong as a family unit and support one another. The universe is unfolding as it should, it will provide.. All that is left for you to do is be grateful and let it in. Try to focus on what makes you happy, what makes you smile. Whether it's perusing old family pics, remembering special moments, Sing out loud in the car to relieve stress (lol, always works for me) etc, etc. Applaud your achievements, as small as they may seem. We all reach the end one day or another. We also find ways to get back on top. You're amazing, you're special, remember that and know that tomorrow is another window of opportunity. =) Stay positive! U can do it. =)

Tammy - posted on 04/17/2009

Erinn, don't worry there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I've been exactly where you are now, when I was in my early twenties, we struggled and were pretty much living in poverty. We one time had to go to the food bank, which was just mortifying for us.
That was 10 years ago, with patience and starting at the bottom we have both managed to obtain wonderful careers which we both love, and pay well. We've gone from wondering how we would pay the rent, to owning two properties - mortgage free. I'm not saying this to brag, only to bring you hope for the future.
Also, those times brought my husband and I so close together. To be able to go through tough times together and make it, makes you very, very strong as a couple.
I KNOW it's tough right now, you probably feel like things are hopeless, and have sleepless nights worrying, it's especially difficult when you have little ones to care for. The best thing my husband ever taught me, and it took years, was not to worry. He would always say, "we'll figure something out", and somehow we always did.

If you can, take some time for yourself - it's so important. Even if it's just to get out for a walk or a coffee. Go to the library, get a book that you can really get into and read that, I found reading took my mind off my worries during those times, and helped me to sleep.
Just remember, this too shall pass - and you WILL be fine, you will come out of this. You are a strong woman.

Jenn - posted on 04/17/2009

Erinn, I think the best thing you could do is to set aside you time! Really, my husband has been soo supportive of getting me my own time whether it's to go to the library, go to the gym, or just get out of the house for an hour whenever i need it. It helps you recharge, remember that you are a person not a machine like sometimes our families can make us feel. And find someone - not your husband to talk to- someone who calls you at least once a week - and you can call whenever - to talk about something besides what is going on in your house. Believe me - it does help.

Alicia - posted on 04/17/2009

All I have to say is hang in there, stay strong. We have all felt that way. I have one kid, a boy, who is 19 months old and a step son who is 12..... who we have full custody of..and I am the "man" of the house. I make the rules and I have to make all the decisions..It sucks somethimes, I actually was having panic attacks because it's just too much to handle sometimes. I kinda get them still, but I have learned to just BREATHE..... and take it one day at a time... and I'm only 26 and I have been a step mom to a brat for 5 yrs. (sorry) He was the only grandkid untill just recently and his mom isn't in his life so they think by buying him things it's going to make up for his mothers love..... Whoa..... but with time, he's maturing and getting better, I still get stressed but...motherhood is hard and just stay strong and try to stay focused on the positve, even though it's easier said than done... and oh another tip...when making dinner have one..two.... glasses of wine!! LOL it helps me!!!! stay strong, we are tougher than we think...

User - posted on 04/17/2009

Hi! Einn,

It sounds like you need a time out for you. Find a friend or family member to take the kids and just take a day for you. While on your day just relaxe no shopping or paying bills make it your day. Take a nice hot bath and soak, read a book, or just take a walk. Make sure you do this by yourself, no kids, no husband, just you. Take time to breath and relaxe then when your day is over when you getting stressed again just think of this day and it will help. My family and I will be praying for you. God bless!

Lisa - posted on 04/17/2009

you might have post-pardom depression. your kids are beautiful. so thank god u have them. a boy and a girl u should be lucky. pray and try to look on the bright side. at least u have a family who loves u. nobody says life is easy. everyone has problems. its up to u how u deal with them. play games with your son, love your husband, make them laugh and give your daughter alot of hugs and kisses. she wont be a baby forever. good luck.

Katrina - posted on 04/17/2009

Wow...you got a lot if great advice...as a single mother of three...The only advice that I can often you is to get some me time....Leave the kids with your husband and get out...go to the library, take in a movie....better yet send the husband and kids out for a couple of hours and relax . Good Luck

Sarah-jayne - posted on 04/17/2009

hang in there, we all get like that at times belive me, when my 2 girls were younger i was a single mum going through a really messy divorce with there dad, the girls use to play me up at night time they would be running around at 11pm every night it drove me mad, until 1 day i took a big breath and pulled myself together and took control once more, it is the most difficult job in the world being a mum, if u have good friends a family around u to support u will get through it, i know at the minute it doesnt feel that way but im sure it will xxx

Lisa - posted on 04/17/2009

Spiritually, cry out to God. When my son was i the hospital on life support, I walked for 29 hours and cried out to our Lord "My God, My God, please here my plee, Have mercy, Have mercy, Have mercy on me". He did, he got me thru the darkest days of my life and continues to have mercy and grace on me! Pray without ceasing, he is there and waiting for you to call out to him! I will pray for you too!

Karla - posted on 04/17/2009

pnd????? Cheer up you got 2 healthy kids, i got a diabetic (9 years)who nearly died from it 2 years ago and a 2 year that dont talk and might have autisum, and i have a 3 year old all my family are in the uk my husband had cancer last year(has the all clear now) my dads just been rushed into hospital wtih suspected kidney failure. (and i have to catch a plane tomorrow to see him)my sister inlaw is in a wheel chair and has been given 3 years left to live (she has a 5 year old. its tough its hard but it can be a lot worse be thankfull for what you have got. chill out and enjoy the time with your kids - first words - walking - crawling - going to the park. making them smile.. soon your son will start school and you will meet other moms and make friends with them through your child. i have had to deal with all of the above with little support as my family are in a different country - im 28 and my motto is what dont kill u only makes you stronger..... but go to the docs incase its post natal depression - cheer up and enjoy the kids

Miriam - posted on 04/17/2009

Hey ther Erinn, I remember when I brought my second son home and my other son was 21/2. It took me about 6 months to get adjusted. Im sure it adds more stress that your husband is not working right now. Is it possible to see the silver lining in that this is a very small window when your husband can help you with the kids and get to spend time with them he might not if he was working? I have felt the same way as well of not knowing who I was, but your kids know who you are. To them you are the best mommy ever, who know you love them and care for them and show it with every cuddle, hug, kiss and playtime. This too shall pass, try and stay in the moment, I'll be pray for you. IF you do have a hobby you enjoy, ask your husband to help you carve out maybe a 1/2 hour to 1 hour everyday for yourself. I know that helps me to express myself through creative things, i.e. crafts, scrapbooking. God bless, things will get better.



miriam

Lora - posted on 04/16/2009

Hi Erinn, first, be proud of yourself for reaching out to your community of women! That's great and says so much about you! You could choose to bury yourself further in depression but you must be a fighter to try and tie that knot at the end of your rope and hang on, good for you. I wish I had some great words of wisdom that would change things in a blink, but I dont. I run groups for women who have incurable health issues, one common thread is how to cope with things that seem out of our control, or just hard to handle. My advice, take time for your spirit in order to see 'the bigger picture', I dont necessarily mean religious (unless thats your thing), I mean more 'spiritual' as in a higher power or nurturing the you inside of you. Try spending some time reading meaningful books, The Power of Now by Eckhart Toole deals with how to live in the 'Now' and get through it, he also talks about what makes us happy. Look on YouTube for his and others free inspiring talks, uplifting subjects/people REALLY do help. Join a women's group, charity, support group, cooking group... many are free and offered by your community,its a chance to get out among women by yourself to remember who you are. Have weekly or monthly women's potlucks, cards...make the men watch the kids, you will be surprised how many other women need to relate again. Join an online support group, I know by experience you can find many rewarding relationships there.Most of all cont to talk, don't cocoon yourself, that will only make matters worse. I hope something there helps, your on the right track, keep reaching out. Above all Erinn, remember, the only constant and unchanging thing..is change itself...this time WILL PASS, I guarantee it,,and time DOES move quickly, just a deep breath and tomorrow will come. Hugs.

Carolee - posted on 04/16/2009

Hello Erinn ! my name is Carolee . There are plenty of solutions i could give you , but it sounds like from what you have said that right now you need a big hug and a True friend . I am a life coach , married to my best friend ,a mother of 4 and can honestly say that i am Truly Happy . I have been working on my philosophy for as long as I can remember .i have a group in circle of moms called SHINE check it out . I share my philosophy about Life Love and God . It might help you some . if you need to talk let me know ;]

Kristi - posted on 04/16/2009

Well, you are completely normal!!! I am just getting over that same thing. I now know that it was partly post-pardem depression, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. Your body is still having lots of of hormonal changes going on and it's just going to take a little time to get in check. Honestly, I think you just need and ear (not necessarily a therapist) just a good friend!! Don't be so hard on yourself and nap with the kids cause lack of sleep is really going to set you back. Take a visit to your natural medecine shop and talk to the trained person there I bet it helps!! If you like what I've had to say then please reply back and we can talk more..

Stef - posted on 04/16/2009

Oh hun, sounds like you're at the end of your tether! If your hubbys is currently unemployed he should be taking the kids off your hands as often as he can...give you some 'you' time, time to get away and take some time out. Go for a walk to clear your head and take lots of deep breaths, maybe try some meditation....it'll help with the lack of sleep (unless its your wee one thats keeping you awake, if so train your kids to sleep). Make sure your'e eating wholefoods not processed convenience foods. Can you ask friends or family for help if your hubby is too busy looking for a job? Remember you are amazing and very very capable. You are a woman and a wife aswell as a mamma and you WILL get thru this. Hang in there sista. Aroha from Aotearoa.xx

Leanne - posted on 04/16/2009

I tried to enjoy the little things - smiles, hugs, giggles. Enjoy the love that your children have for you.
Can your son go to preschool or the grandparents for a day or two a week? Maybe your partner can have 'boys bonding' time. That would give you time to slow down and enjoy bonding time with your daughter. I found having a weekly date with mothers of children the same age each week gave me something to look forward to, a chance to shower and get out of track pants, and realise that all the other mothers had concerns about their children and their own sanity
Schedule time with your partner - get him to cook you dinner once a week, turn off the tv and take time to enjoy each other
It is hard work raising two cherubs but hang in there

Aubrey - posted on 04/16/2009

Rely on friends for support. Don't be afraid to leave your children and step out for some fresh air. I suffered from Post Partum depression and it was the hardest, most painful thing I've ever gone through. By the way,I'm not suggesting that this is what you are suffering from just relating to the pain. It only got better when I made connections with other moms who were going through the same thing (this is key!) and when I started leaving my children a bit, for walks, nights out, yoga or whatever! As someone who has suffered from being seriously lost in the madness of raising children, I can tell you that IT WILL NOT LAST!

Randi - posted on 04/16/2009

Just know that the Lord will not put more on you than you can bear... the trick it letting go and Let God... prayer works... get involved in a church and possible talk to others that will encourage, uplift and pray for you and your family.

Zengirl4 - posted on 04/16/2009

Dear Erinn. I understand what you are feeling. My first pregnancy was with twins (surprise!!) and exactly one year later I fell pregnant with my third son who was also a surprise. After losing so much of myself and my friends, crying uncontrollably I went to the Dr who diagnosed severe post natal depression. For me (and I can only speak for myself) having a diagnosis and help with the aid of anti-depressants made me feel better and my family function better as mummy was not constantly angry or sad. There is nothing in the world that can prepare you for motherhood and comparing yourself with others who "appear to be handling it" can only make the feelings worse. Talk to someone you can trust, your Dr, if you are religious your church as from my experience it only got worse eventually turning into Post Natal psychosis. I hope you realise you are doing a wonderful job, every minute of every day and that one day, you will reappear once the fog has lifted. Keep well

Alison - posted on 04/16/2009

Sometimes it's hard to enjoy being a mom when things are not going well. I am also in your situation because I don't remember who I was. In the last 5 years I remember being pregnant, giving birth and all the developmental stages of my sons life. I don't remember my late 20's for my own enjoyment. I also can't sleep much at the moment. I'm lucky because I did get an education and I trust God.

All I can say is for your own sanity, take steps to do something about the stuff you do have control over such as your own future career prospects or developing your own interests if you can find the time. If nothing else at least trust in your ability as a mother. I'm sure you are a good mother and your kids will become more independant as they get older so you can get some "me time".

And yes, I know I should take some of my own advice.

Natalie - posted on 04/16/2009

oh you poor thing, is there anyway for you to look at some part time work? sounds like you need it more !

remember none of this will last long, try and love it all now as much as you can, you'll get by, where there is a will there is a way eh ?

try and make he most of these amazing days before there gone for ever, and most of all, remember your sense of humour sweetie ! what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and what doesn't break you gives you great funny stories to tell others !!

Yahminah - posted on 04/16/2009

Get some rest and have a 'me' day. You have to stay strong for your children and husband, however, you have to mentally re-group before you can help anyone else. I am a married working mom of 4 y/o twins and an 8 y/o. Your husbands unemployment is something you cannot control so focus on what you can control. Try to find ways to cut expenses,email your husbands resume to employers, put your children on a schedule so that you have some husband and wife time in the evenings. What ever you do, don't isolate yourself. Things will get better and you will be a much stronger person having gone through it.

Julia - posted on 04/16/2009

Have you considered the possibility that you are suffering from post-partum depression? Especially if you have been feeling this way since shortly after your daughter was born. Talk to your doctor, there are medications that will help. Once you feel a little better life won't seem quite so overwhelming. Trust me, I've been there myself! I hope you feel better.

Tamara - posted on 04/16/2009

hay i feel the same way sometimes but you just got to keep on going and go with the flow as ma mum always says to me if u really want a friend im willing to be one for you heas ma email if u ever want to talk to me it's tamara.kingham@yahoo.com

Nancy - posted on 04/16/2009

If your husband is still unemployed, you may want to look into working a couple days a week so that you have some down time from being Mom, wife and everybodies answer to everything. It would help with the stress of your husband not working and when you spend a few hours away from your children during the week you really learn how much you love and miss them when you are away.

Heidi - posted on 04/16/2009

There are lots of people to talk to on here! My name is Heidi, I am 44, I have 3 older children from my first marriage and a 16 month old little girl that my husband and I are adopting. I can feel some of the pain you are going through. It is really tough when your spouse is not employed and you still need to pay your bills! It is challenging enough raising young children and then to throw the unemployed husband into the mix makes it worse. It will get better, don't worry. Love those little babies, they grow up way too fast!!! You can make it through this hard time, don't worry. Just talk to everyone on here anytime you are feeling down, we will try to cheer you up as best we can. You have two beautiful children by the way!!

Heidi - posted on 04/16/2009

There are lots of people to talk to on here! My name is Heidi, I am 44, I have 3 older children from my first marriage and a 16 month old little girl that my husband and I are adopting. I can feel some of the pain you are going through. It is really tough when your spouse is not employed and you still need to pay your bills! It is challenging enough raising young children and then to throw the unemployed husband into the mix makes it worse. It will get better, don't worry. Love those little babies, they grow up way too fast!!! You can make it through this hard time, don't worry. Just talk to everyone on here anytime you are feeling down, we will try to cheer you up as best we can. You have two beautiful children by the way!!

Brynn - posted on 04/16/2009

Sounds like you have your hands full. I only have one and I thought I was losing my mind. Maybe you could get a babysitter to watch your kids and get out of the house for a while to have some "you" time. Get a pedicure of just go to the library and read a book. As much of a blessing as babies are, you can't forget that you are a woman and wife first. Lock your self in the bathroom for 2 or 3 minutes and take some deep breathes. It will allow more oxygen to your brain and help you feel better. I am really sorry that you are feeling stressed but it is only because you want to be a great mommy. Just remember that those beautiful babies that you are giving up so much for will one day give up a lot for you. Good luck with everything and God bless you and your family.