Jenni - posted on 04/17/2013 ( 8 moms have responded )
I will try to keep this short. lol.
I had my son in 2008; his father and I were not in a relationship, we've known each other and had been very close friends since middle school. So when our night of drinking turned into a "slip up" I wasn't worried at all that he would deny our child. The first 2 and a half years of my sons life his father was very in and out; he would go anywhere from 2 weeks to 6-7 months without seeing our son. He also didn't work. So I made a wise decision years ago to file for child support. Because he didn't show up to court the 3 times he had a chance to, the judge ordered $460 a month to me, and $40 to the state for our sons medicaid.
WELL... My son's father has shaped up in the past, almost, 2 years. He started taking our son when I needed him to, and his wife takes wonderful care of our son as well. He started working last year, but still ignored his child support obligations until tax time came around. Now the FOC knows of his employment status and took into account that he now owes me $19,000 they started deducting from his paychecks and I received his taxes.
SO THIS IS WHAT I NEED ADVICE ON NOW THAT I EXPLAINED ---SOME--- OF THE BACKGROUND STORY.
Now that he is pretty much a 50/50 parent he wants me to take him off child support and file for joint custody. BUT... Once my son starts school in September, he will be with me 5 afternoons a week, and with his father on the weekends ONLY so I am unsure if I want to stop support altogether or just get it lowered.
I work full time making --ok-- money (depends on how you look at $10.15 an hour), my live-in boyfriend of 3 years also works full time making about the same, and also works a second part- time job on the weekends... Our cost of living (mortgage, bills, cable/internet) is 1/3 of our income after taxes.
The money I received from my sons father so far was in the amount of roughly $1400 and I took my son shopping for new clothes, shoes, ect. All of the money was spent on my son. So do I keep my sons father on a lowered amount because of his absence in the past when I was paying for everything myself as a reimbursement from when I had to struggle and didn't have anyone to help me, or do I take him off because I really don't need it because I'm finally comfortable financially?
I'm sorry. I tried to keep it short. If you made it through my book, I would really appreciate some advice on this matter!!