Im new to this site, my daughter will be 3 in april i know that kids go thru the curiousity about anatomy but i didnt think it was this early? how do i deterr her from talking about it...i feel like she is too young.

Abigail - posted on 07/12/2009

I don't think there is anything wrong with children asking about their bodies or touching themselves. My daughter is one and has recently discovered her vagina. When she touches it I just tell her what it is [not that she cares right now but I want her to get used to the word] and let her do her thing. I also feel it's VERY important to teach them the correct words. It's a vagina and a penis...its not a pee pee and winkie. That always bothers me. They need to be able to feel comfortable with themselves and the words.

Julie - posted on 07/12/2009

When my 7 yr old was 4 we caught her touching herself but it stopped I also thought that was young at the time so since it stopped we waited. last summer we found her touching herself again but became embaressed when ew asked her about it. Come to find out the 6 yr old next door touched her there when nooone was watching. He had been touched by his day care provider. I told the mother and she apologized to no end. My husband and I spoke to her about it and it seemed to go away for a while. Now we often catch her touching herself but when we ask her what she was doing and y she gets defensive and embarressed. We ask if someone has touched her again and she says no shes just playing. But at 7 should they jsut be "playing" i tell her to not do it because she can get a rash of infection from any first or germs on her hands but it doesnt seem to work. A few months ago we got a preschool book from the library explaining body parts since she asked about my male dog and it seemed to be ok but we caught her again today touching herself. I just dont know how to handle it. Any ideas? My 14 yr old never did anything like that which confuses me and makes me more not knowing how to handle it.

Stephanie - posted on 12/05/2008

If you could have a constant ultrasound on during pregnancy, you would be surprised at how often babies in the womb play with themselves. It is actually a normal thing for kids to do. You could try to talk to her and tell her that it is normal but it's something that we don't do or talk about when we are around other people. Make sure she doesn't feel like she's doing something wrong because she isn't. We told our kids that it's normal and if they want to do that, it needs to be in private, eg. their bedroom. Also, if you choose to talk to her about this, it would be a good time to tell her that she can touch herself but no one else is allowed to (except for you and her dad while helping her wipe or taking a bath to get her clean). I hope this helps.

Cindy - posted on 12/05/2008

I totally agree with everyone here, that she is not too young to hear about her private body parts. If she is asking, indeed you should explain to her. Just keep it simple. She is 3 and is just curious. Just tell her the name of the body part, and xplain that they are special parts, and are private. Thats all she needs to know. As they grow a little older they will ask questions about where babies come from etc...and I think those questions should never be ignored, but answered in accordance to what age the asking child is. They know mommy and daddy sleep in the same bed, and they can know where babies come from, but they dont need it all in detail. I think it's good to answer their questions, just keep in mind how detailed you get, with what age they are. :)

Jessica - posted on 12/05/2008

My oldest daughter was also very curious very young (she is 12 now) and I have always answered the question truthfully with age appropriate answers. I always answer just the question w/o giving any extra details at all. If more questions were to follow, I did the same. There were times when I thought OH NO... where is this question going to end up but I found that usually just a simple age appropriate answer cured the curiousity and there usually werent many more questions to follow until she got older. I still do the same now but thanks to the kids at school, I am having to tell more than I would like but I want her to know the truth instead of what other kids are saying. So again... I try my best to keep it age appropriate. Good Luck ;)

Nicola - posted on 12/05/2008

my son is 3 and a half and has always been curios about things and i was brought up in a home where if i had a question i could ask my mam and she wud answer as truthfully as she cud depending on my age and the question ect. so i do the same like wen he touches him self i tel him to go to his room as ppl dont want to see that! which is true but dont make it wierd 4 him, so hopefully my son wil no wen he gets older that he can ask me anything so mayb one day when he wants to have sex or anything he'l come to me 1st because i wont judge him and il be honest!

User - posted on 12/05/2008

You probably feel uncomfortable because you associate private parts to sexuality, but they dont, so dont worry about it. Knowing what her vagina is is teh same as knowing what her belly button in, just that this area is private.

Sonja - posted on 12/04/2008

Encourage the conversation. You are building trust with her. She will feel comfortable coming to you about body questions as she grows older, because you don't treat it with a hush-hush vibe when she's younger. If you are concerned about her asking other people these types of questions let her know that it's a private discussion between Mommy's and their daughters and all of her questions can be directed to you, and you will be happy to tell her what she'd like to know.

Nikki - posted on 12/03/2008

I totally agree with Tasha Weiss. I have a 3 year old and my husband and I have been completely honest with her about her body. Now, the sex talk....that will be a long time before I think about that.

Jennifer - posted on 12/03/2008

I agree with the others. I think it's a non issue and completely normal to be curious. Just remember if you make a big deal out of it your child will think it's a big deal.

Christa - posted on 12/03/2008

I agree that the longer you wait to explain things like this to kids, the more they are going to continually bring it up until they get an answer. Kids can understand more than we give them credit for many times.

Carrie - posted on 12/03/2008

Just an FYI there was a study done about 5 years ago that children that know proper names for body parts ie vagina and penis are less likely to be targeted by pedophiles- this was a survey of pedphiles currently serving sentences- it SCARED them to have kids using ADULT words for their private parts. Having said that it ends up being a personal family choice my son is almost 5 he uses penis and testicles and knows the proper names for the female parts as well even though he prefers the terms boobah and joy--- I have no idea where he got joy from.

Tasha - posted on 12/03/2008

You need to find what is best for you. My husband and I have cosen to be honest about what she asks-even about body parts. Having said this, when she started talking about boys having tails we explained that it was a penis and she had a vagina- she mentioned it a couple of times in our home and to family and then she was done. SHe knows what the parts are, but we haven't gone into sex ed or anything. The curiosity was gone once she knew what was going on.

User - posted on 12/03/2008

Bodies are not to be ashamed of. They are special and private.That is great that she is inquisitive. You ARE the best person to guide her. Answer her questions honestsly but only her questions. God gave her this body and she should learn to respect it now.

Cynthia - posted on 12/03/2008

I agree with Christine. It is important to know the proper names of all body parts. It shouldn't be an embarassing topic.

Kristen - posted on 12/03/2008

i went through the same thing with my daughter who will be 3 this month, i just explained to her about her body and why it is private and something to be respected, she understands now she still asks occasional questions (for example: yesterday asking why her boobies were small and mine were big LOL) but thats all natural and you are the best person to explain it to her.

Christine - posted on 12/03/2008

Why do you feel she is too young? Would you think the same if she asked a question about her ears or nose? Treat it like any other body part, and it's a non-issue.