Lyndsay - posted on 07/03/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )
I don't really know what the hell is happening to me, I cant stop crying about EVERYTHING in my life. I constantly feel like failing in everything. Like I am failing everyone around me, my husband and my baby, my parents and his parents.
My 11 month old wont sleep through the night and hasn't all for 11 months, she eats the tiniest amount of solid food and then decides she has had enough and only wants breast milk again and i dont know how to encourage her to eat more and to be less attached to the breast. She wont got to sleep unless she is breastfed to sleep, she will sometimes go back to sleep if she wakes up in the night without it, but not always and it is normally just toughing through her crying when you do get around it.
Im trying so hard to practice attachment parenting, but, I feel like i missed something.. .I feel like it isnt supposed to be this hard. I hear so many mothers.. 'I just shoosh her to sleep and rub her belly and she drifts off to sleep' .. My girl.. Noooo.. None of that.
The house is NEVER clean and it disgusts me, I have no idea how to budget and neither does my partner so we are constantly strapped for cash with just enough food in the fridge because I buy all the wrong stuff.
I just feel like I missed something, like all these things someone should have explained to me how to do but nobody did..
I want to go back to work so badly but we cant afford daycare, but then.. we cant afford half the bills without me going back..
Im so stressed out that as soon as i even think about if im ok i burst into tears, i dont want to go anywhere cause people can just tell im not myself and that i seem sad... but then, im sad because im not going anywhere.
Its like im stuck in catch 22.
Please help me, i need advice!!