Is there any Step Moms out there??

Blanchie - posted on 08/15/2009 ( 361 moms have responded )

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I have 2 stepsons and 1 step daughter... I have tried everything under the sun to get along with them.. Any Advice..

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Blanchie - posted on 08/15/2009

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I was always the one that bought christmas, birthdays etc and always reminded old Dad to call them on these days and such... But since they started treating me the way they do I have quit and now they get nuttin... So I guess they figure Dad quit but it was always me that did it all for them....

Latoya - posted on 08/15/2009

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I agree 100 percent my step chilfren are 12 an 9 a set of twins. my husand wants the 12yr old to live with us but i kinda disagree because i alreadyhave three of my own and theirmom is nutso and wacko
im only 30 still young and want a life not someone elses responsibilities.am i wrong?

Blanchie - posted on 08/15/2009

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I have been married to their Dad for 18 years and been in there lives since they was 14, 16 and 18 the daughter... We got alone at first butonce I started making them clean up after their self or make rules they did not like that.... They just quit calling or coming around because I keep a clean house and I have rules....Their Dad really just stays out of it and lets us handle it between our selves... They are good kids but just don't like my rules which my kids go by the same ones... They are all grown, married with kids....I just feel bad for their Dad.... He is the one that is really getting the shit end of the stick... Birthday they don't call him, Fathers Day no calls..........The x wife does not brother us and never has...... She don't really have much to do with them Their Dad raised them....

Latoya - posted on 08/15/2009

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I'm experiencing it too..............just pray and give them the best love u have just as u would ur own.

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Melissa, I am in the same boat as you when it comes to my step-kids mother. She is completly crazy, and also tries using the kids to find out what goes on at our house. She even goes as far as talking bad about me to my step kids, and i am really close with my step kids, so they come and tell me. She has even gotten remarried recently (FINALLY!!!lol) and we were hoping that would make it better, but its actually gotten worse cuz her n her new husband are having problems, so she calls us even more, for no reason. when we have the kids, she seriously calls at LEAST 5-6 times a day, its ridiculous

Melissa - posted on 08/15/2009

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i agree rebecca. I am getting married in three weeks and will become the step mom of three children, two boys aged ten and nine and a girl, 7. It is tough even now to relate to them but i really try to show interest in what they are doing, etc. What makes it the hardest i think is that their mom is a nut job and uses the kids to get information about our life. Its a challenge thats for sure, but praying is what i do best.

Rebecca - posted on 08/15/2009

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how old r they. my stepson is 16. i came into his life when he was 13, basically already raised. we get along sometimes but we butt heads more. from my experience, the younger they r when u get into their lives, the better, but i know that u also cant always help the timing. i guess the best advice i can give u, im still trying to follow this myself, is to give the situation to God and pray that he helps where its needed.

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How old are they, and how long have you been with there father? I have 2 step kids, 6 and 5. I have been with there dad for 4 years, so since they were babies. I also have a daughter from an ex, and her biological father passed away, and her and my husband are extremely close, she even calls my husband daddy. Now with my step kids, we get along MOST of the time. But we also have our moments, I treat them no differently than my own kids, they get rewarded and punished the same. I think consitency (sp?) is always very important, has hard as it is sometimes, just make them realize no matter what, youre going to be there, even when its tuff. Maybe when they see that you DO care, and youre not going anywhere, theyll come around, or at the very least respect the fact that you are still a parent to them

Beth - posted on 08/15/2009

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How old are they? I have 2 step-sons (10 & 11) and 1 step-daughter (13). We have our moments. I have been with thier Dad for 5 years. They have lived with us the whole time.

Wendy - posted on 08/15/2009

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As someone who has a step mom it is very hard to know how to act in these situations because no matter what is done, it'll be hard for them to accept the change. Depending in your situation. I think the key is communication, be straight forward with how you feel and how you want things to be between you and them. Listen to them and how they feel. I know sometimes you won't hear what you would like but be patient and baby steps. Hang in there, and good luck.

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