Just wondering how long you have to be involved in a childs life befor it is ok for them to call you mommy ...

Amie - posted on 04/15/2009

There's nothing wrong with this as long as it is their choice to call you that. It shows they are comfortable with you, that you provide them with a stable home and most importantly that they love and trust you.
Kids aren't dumb, they are very smart... for them to call you mom is a great honor. Cherish it.
My own kids started calling my fiance dad after we had been together almost a year. On the other side though his mom had been trying to get them to call him dad from the get go... I put a stop to that right away though. When they did start though he was very happy and touched. So it's not entirely a bad thing but do be aware that if anything were to happen and you guys weren't together anymore the kids will be impacted heavily by it. No matter their age.

Tina - posted on 04/15/2009

I think that is they are comfortable with calling u mommy then its ok as long as i dont push or force them to call u anything that they dont want to

Libby - posted on 04/15/2009

Let me give a different perspective.  I agree that being called "mom" or "dad" is an earned thing.  I told my own biological father that after contacting him when I became a parent.  He didn't raise me and wasn't around when I was little, so he didn't earn that title and I told him I would not call him "dad".  But on the flipside to someone else's children calling you "mom", I almost feel like you should be married for them to call you that.  Obviously if they start calling you that on their own and you're not married, then you have to deal with how you want to handle that.  But from what I saw with my brother in law and the situation he got in as "daddy", it broke his heart, and the kids.  Him and his girlfriend were engaged but even before that she had the kids call him daddy.  It seemed kinda fast, but I didn't want to butt into their business.  Then after a really bad falling out, my brother in law lost the children he had been helping raise, and the kids lost yet another daddy.  I think everyone just needs to be conscious on how certain things can effect a child if the situation were to change!  I know, I know!  We all are in love and are going to be together forever.  That's the perfect world we live in, right?!  If it were perfect every child would have both of their biological parents in their lives and married to each other, etc.  But our world is not perfect and we need to remind ourselves that when taking care of these little ones.  I commend you though, Leah, for taking over someone else's responsibility.  It's not easy to raise someone else's kids. 

Leah - posted on 04/15/2009

Thanx everyone this has helped me very much ...

Naomi - posted on 04/14/2009

funny you should ask that question i have been with my husband for 3 n a half years my youngest son was 3 n a half when we met and is the only man in his life as in a farther figure as my son has chosen to have nothing to do with his own dad as he was letting him down all the time so he made up his own mind he didnt want to see him and hasnt done now for almost 9 months and doesnt even speak if we see him out n about and evenrefers to him by his name now not his dad .He tells his friends his dad is a tiler which is refering to his step dad and everything to do with dad is directed at his step dad but he doesnt call him dad do you think this will come in time ?x

Sharon - posted on 04/14/2009

From the other side of the coin - I am a divorced mom and my kids have a step mom - I have no problem with them calling her mommy... It means that they are really lucky to have 2 moms who care for them.

You have cared for and loved them - if they choose to call you mommy then that is how they see you... it is not a threat to their "other mommy"..  Enjoy it and don't worry.  

Aeron - posted on 04/14/2009

There is nothing wrong with them calling you mommy. I too am a step-mom, but my step-children were older when my husband and I got together. They don't call me mom, but they love me just the same - and I them. I think that it is great that they would want to call you mommy. That to me is a great indication that you are a very important role model and trusted person in their lives. If it seems natural for them to call you mommy, then let them - it's a compliment.

Kristina - posted on 04/14/2009

Did you or anyone else ask  those children to call you mommy or did they do it on their own? Was there any disscussion between anyone to make the kids feel like they had to call you mommy? I feel if the kids want to call you mommy , then that was their choice ;) As for the "my other mommy doing this", maybe the kids are being taught to say that towards you? If not and they want to call you mommy, thats your choice if you fill its what you want. Hope that any or all of this was helpful to you ;)

Anne - posted on 04/14/2009

Mommy is a title that is not given, it is earned...you have CLEARLY earned that title. You are the chief "cook and bottle washer." They obviously feel safe and secure enough with you to call you that. If their "mother" chooses not to see them it is her loss and your gain.

Good luck, and enjoy your title!!!

Naomi - posted on 04/14/2009

i agree you must be special to be called mummy you have earned that and deserve it

well done xxx

Nicole - posted on 04/14/2009

I agree with Kimberly. There is no set amount of time that needs to pass for it to be "Ok" for a step-child to call you mommy. Even though they already have a mom, you are still taking care of them in that aspect and they obviously love you and feel comfortable calling you mommy so smile, be happy and keep up the good work. :)

Kimberly - posted on 04/14/2009

No there is nothing wrong with her calling you mommy. You are there to take care of her. Any one can be a mother it takes someone special to be called mommy. My daughter is our niece we plan to adopt her. we have had her since she was three weeks old. you have earned their love and trust you have every right to be called mommy. it is a joy honor and privilage to be called mommy don't feel any guilt enjoy it and God Bless you for taking care of anothers children. they are a gift from God.