Miscarriage and trying again

Christine - posted on 11/25/2009 ( 47 moms have responded )

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I had a miscarriage at the beginning of August. I was 9 weeks along when it happened. The doctor said that once my normal cycle came back we could try again. It did come back six weeks later and we started trying. It has been almost 4 months since it happened and no luck so far. I am getting more and more upset about it. I was wondering if anyone has gone through the same thing and has any advice. I have used the ovulation kit each month and it has never said that I am ovulating either. Is that normal? I am calling my doctor if we do not get pregnant this cycle.

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Tracy - posted on 11/26/2009

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Hi, Christine! I am so sorry for your loss...I know it's devastating. My husband and I lost our second child at 11 weeks, and then had trouble getting pregnant again, so I know exactly what you're going through. I had gotten pregnant so easily with my 1st and with the one that I lost, so I, too, got very stressed as each month went by and I wasn't pregnant. My OB finally suggested that we do a Clomid induction to help things along. Clomid is a fertility drug, but the chances of multiples are virtually zero. All it does is ensure that you ovulate. After my miscarriage, I started hemorrhaging, and had to have an emergency D&C, and apparently the whole thing messed up my system and I wasn't ovulating. I did one trial of the Clomid and got pregnant with my son right away. I was on Progesterone through the entire first trimester, and he's a happy, healthy 2 year old boy. We didn't think that we would be able to get pregnant again without help, but when my son was 6 months old, we found out that our third child was on the way, and he's nearly 9 months now.



I would suggest that you speak with your OB about Clomid. It worked beautifully for us.

Jessica - posted on 12/02/2009

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Sorry to hear about your loss Christine. My first pregnancy resulted in a miscarrige. The best thing you & your partner can do is not stress over it! Get the ovulation kit & toss it! Make love for the fun of it & to be close. It will happen for you, some dr's will say it's a genetic abnormality that caused it & it's not yor fault! Unless you were drinking or doing drugs it's true. Just because you had a miscarrige doesn't mean you can't have a healthy baby! My husband & I have 5 healthy beautiful kids. And I've been pregnant 8 times, I've been through it allso if you have anymore questions or just wanna talk feel free!! Jessica

Melanie - posted on 11/27/2009

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I'm sorry you've had to go through this. I miscarried at 10 weeks and then it took almost a year to get pregnant again. when i did get pregnant it was twins and I lost one of them. One was stronger than the other (she survived) the other wasn't. I've had about 5 miscarriages in total and i know that you need to stop thinking so hard about getting pregnant and concentrate on having fun. It will happen but i found that when you are more relaxed instead of stress your body works better. I know it's hard when it doesn't happen. I took myself away from the idea of desperatley trying for a baby. I think you need som de-stressing. try and find any natural rememdies. I was told (i know this sounds silly) but after sex stay with my legs in air for few minutes and then avoid anything with caffeine in it for a few hours afterwards. don't know if it work but was willing to try anything. Good luck xx

Megan - posted on 12/02/2013

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i just went through a miscarriage last week with a d and c and im trying to figure out everything my dr said i could start haveing intercourse again in 1 wk and then start trying after 1 month but i was wondering if anyone has not done this and just started trying once u get released to start having intercourse again? any help would greatly be appreciated we r very upset with this and wanted another one so bad and our kids were so excited thanks for any help

Lera - posted on 11/27/2009

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I have seven children and had a miscarriage between number 5 and 6. It took two years before I got pregnant with number 6 after my miscarriage. Your body needs time to heal and as your doctor cannot tell you with 100 % certainty what exactly caused your miscarriage you don't know what kind of damage your body is in. Give yourself some time to heal. It is no different than actually delivering a baby, the doctors tell you that you can have sex again in about 6 weeks but every woman is different and some of us take longer and others don't take as long. I agree with the other ladies, just relax have fun and pray. If it is meant to be it will be.

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Heather - posted on 01/24/2014

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I suffered a miscarriage over 4 months ago and my OB said to wait until I had 3 spontaneous cycles to try again. I did not require a D&C and expected my periods to not be as normal, but each one since resuming my cycles 6 weeks after my loss have lasted at least 7 days. My cycles used to be very predictable and although they have been lengthy with heavier bleeding, the past few have started around the same time. Last month I tried using an OTC Ovulation Testing Kit, but never detected the LH surge. I am worried I may not be ovulating at all, and my chances of having another baby may be slim. I am sorry to all of you who have endured losses.

Kelsey - posted on 12/13/2013

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I had a miscarraige last year n then found out I had a loved heart shaped womb, we've been tryin ever since n my periods are now always painful I seen to be havin no look at all please cud sum1 help

Rachel - posted on 10/13/2011

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YES I have gone through that. I don't suggest you follow his directions if it happens again. I had a miscarriage once and waited and tried for a year before getting preg. again. I once again tried but this time (from advice from a website) right away and was preg. this time about 3 weeks later. The artical said your hormones are already ready to be preg. since you just were. So trying again right away will help jump start it and most of the time you will get preg. quicker...

Heidi - posted on 10/08/2011

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I've had three miscarriages in a row, since May of 2010 til now. We are doing tests now to find out what's wrong and then we may or may not try again. Sorry for your loss, it is the hardes thing i've ever gone through.

Rachel - posted on 11/30/2009

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I tried again right away. I miscarried i don't know how far along and got pregnant naturally about 4 or 5 mo. later. Be patient stress only makes it harder on your body.

Dena - posted on 11/28/2009

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I had a miscarriage, then 9 months later I adopted twin girls, the 6 months later I got pregnant with my son.

Sharon - posted on 11/28/2009

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Sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I too had one with my 1st pregnancy and lost our baby at about 10 weeks along. We then had a break for about 3 months and then started trying again and were pregnant again within 3 months. Mind you after we had our first child and tried again later on it took us 12 months to fall pregnant the 3rd time. I did put alot of pressure on myself and wondered why we werent falling pregnant quickly which stressed me out and made things worse. The one month I finally gave up trying and didnt really do much, then we fell pregnant. Easier said than done to not worry so much but try and do other things to keep your mind busy and it will happen, dont worry. Goodluck.

[deleted account]

I had a miscarriage a few years ago and it took me 6months to get pregnant again.. Your body has to recover. If You have any concerns I would see your Dr.. It's not that uncommon for your ovulation to be off after a miscarriage..

Sylvi-jane - posted on 11/28/2009

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Hi Christina, i have had 5 misscarries over the years ( i misscarried my youngest sons twin, after haveing a smear test, at the time i did not know i was pregnant) i took me six mothes before i fell again after each one, i have now seven children all healthy, six by my x-husband and one with my present husband i had a misscarry early this year i not trying, dont forget to take plenty folic acid to prevent deformed children, and relax dont either of you get stressed unwind by giving each other a massages, lots of foreplay and be spontainious with love making and dont think when and when will i fall always seems to work for me.



i hope this is a help



sylvia-jane



 



 



Quoting Christine:

Miscarriage and trying again

I had a miscarriage at the beginning of August. I was 9 weeks along when it happened. The doctor said that once my normal cycle came back we could try again. It did come back six weeks later and we started trying. It has been almost 4 months since it happened and no luck so far. I am getting more and more upset about it. I was wondering if anyone has gone through the same thing and has any advice. I have used the ovulation kit each month and it has never said that I am ovulating either. Is that normal? I am calling my doctor if we do not get pregnant this cycle.





 

Tabitha - posted on 11/27/2009

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Do you chart? I would chart my cycle and take my basal body temp every morning same time. The month I actually got pregnant my OPT tests came out all negative. So go figure and I couldn't decide where exactly I had ovulated when other months it was totally obvious. I had a miscarraige Dec 2007. Sory for your loss it is not easy at any stage.

JAEN - posted on 11/27/2009

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hi, Christine, You don't say if you had a d and c after your miscarriage. If you didn't,then your body will need a few periods to get back on track. If you did then you would be fertile after your first period. I'm certain that you are not getting pregnant because you are worrying too much. Your state of mind can greatly interfere with your periods, ovulation and hence fertility. Try to relax and not to worry. Give your mind and body a break and if nothings happened after a year, then go back to your GP. Jaen x

Mary Ellen - posted on 11/26/2009

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I had a pregnancy end in a miscarriage. so I tried again..to had another miscarriage. got testing done. I learnt i had a thyroid condition. Dr said a pregnancy can trigger it. get tested! My third pregnancy are a set of healthy twins!

Jodi - posted on 11/26/2009

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Hi.
I had a late miscarriage at 19weeks (1 week off from being able to call it a stillbirth and be given a birth & death certificate). Anyway, we tried to conceive about 2mths or so after we lost our precious Angel. We finally conceived 10mths later and had an early miscarriage and then tried again... In the end it took us 12mths to conceive and we now have a beautiful baby boy.

Honey I feel your pain I truly, truly do. Hang in there. Our bodies have copped so much from the loss of our Angels. Not only from the miscarriage itself but also from the emotional side of things too. Give yourself a break emotionally and in time it will happen. Hopefully sooner than later so you can start to feel whole again.

My thoughts are with you and I dearly hope it happens for you soon.

Jodi

Kimberly - posted on 11/26/2009

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Try taking False Unicorn. It is an herb and it's nickname is baby in a bottle. A good brand is Natures Sunshine.

Debby - posted on 11/26/2009

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Michelle, I am sorry to hear about your loss. A loss at any stage of pregnancy is devastating, especially when you long to have a baby. Time heals...there are also wonderful support groups available for pregnancy loss and these can be beneficial. Having suffered 3 miscarriages and a stillbirth, I found the support group to be an integral part of the healing process for me.

Tracie - posted on 11/26/2009

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I have had 3 miscarriages. I was told by my obstetrician to wait until my body had completed at least one cycle before trying to get pregnant again. It had something to do with my body still having pregnancy hormones, therefore increasing my chances of having another miscarriage. My obstetrician also told me that to increase the chances of getting pregnant, to have sex every second day from day 10 of my cycle. If you & your partner have sex everyday it reduces the sperm count and reduces the risk of a pregnancy occuring. It has worked for us and we have 2 beautiful children. Good luck!!!!

Chelle - posted on 11/26/2009

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it took 7-8 months to fall with my daughter after a misscarage. they will only see it as a problem if you try for 1 year and dont fall pregnant i think.
i know this sounds a bit yucky but a good thing to do is get in tune with your vaginal discharge. when you are ovulating it will become more clear and gooy like egg whites...were as normal discarge will be more water like and a creamy white colour.

Linda - posted on 11/26/2009

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Ask someone who does the natural process for birth control to explain how they check for ovulation. Getting to know your body is a great addition to the kits.
The doctor saying that it was ok to try again did not mean that you were necessarily ovulating again. Hope all goes well

Caroline - posted on 11/26/2009

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Quoting Christine:

Miscarriage and trying again

I had a miscarriage at the beginning of August. I was 9 weeks along when it happened. The doctor said that once my normal cycle came back we could try again. It did come back six weeks later and we started trying. It has been almost 4 months since it happened and no luck so far. I am getting more and more upset about it. I was wondering if anyone has gone through the same thing and has any advice. I have used the ovulation kit each month and it has never said that I am ovulating either. Is that normal? I am calling my doctor if we do not get pregnant this cycle.


 

Lydia - posted on 11/26/2009

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Try not to stress yourself out too much - it doesnt help get pregnant and it just isnt a pleasant way to live - I had 2 miscarriages in the three years it took to get pregnant the first time. To have a miscarriage you need to be able to get pregnant in the first place - which means you are able to get pregnant its just not working to your timetable. My friend was told to give it around 6 months for her cycle to get back to normal so it may just be that you need to be patient. However a preconception check never hurt anyone :)

Emma - posted on 11/26/2009

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Hello Christine.

I had exactly the same problem before my first was born .... I miscarried at 10 weeks and it took a further 6 months to get pregnant again. It was such a taboo subject that no one spoke about it ...... I had a girl-friend who was pregnant the same time as me (if I had not miscarried) and when her baby was born it was so hard for me. My husband really didn't understand that I couldn't go to the hospital to see the new baby. Well I did and it was wonderful. My first was conceived a few months later ....

My advice - just keep trying. Lots and lots and lots of practice makes perfect - I wish you all the luck in the world ........

Emma - posted on 11/26/2009

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Like many others I am in the same situation. I have just recently had my 2nd miscarriage and this is my first cycle so I am also trying this month! After my 1st miscarriage we started trying straight away but after a while we realised it was too soon. We left it for about 9 months and fell again but unfortunately it didn't take. Again we are trying straight away but we feel more emotionally stable this time. I have a 3 year old son so I know it works. It's hard not to think about getting pregnant again, it's all I thought about whilst still miscarrying! but you do need to try and relax a little. It will happen when it's ready to. Good luck.

Jessica - posted on 11/26/2009

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Sorry about your miscarriage, I understand completely how you are feeling. My husband and I lost our baby at 9 weeks late October 2008. It was an unplanned pregnancy but we had gotten used to the idea that we were going to have a family, then it all fell apart. I was lucky in one aspect that I did not require a D & C as an ultrasound showed that there was no remaining tissue etc. It is recommended to wait until after your next cycle, it didn't happen that way for us. 3 weeks later I fell again and we now have a beautiful 14 week old daughter. Although it didn't take much for us, one thing I could advise is, stop trying. Start having fun with your husband again... Sometimes planning is mankinds biggest failure. Stop trying, start having fun again and good things will happen!

Andrea - posted on 11/26/2009

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hi christine, i'm so sorry about your miscarriage, i know how hard and upsetting this time is. i miscarried nov 2007on my first pregnancy. it wasn't a planned pregnancy as my husband and i were not ready for a family at that time. we were both over the moon as it made the decision for us to have a family. i was so excited as it was my first pregnancy and so first baby. when i had my 12 week scan i was told my baby had died at 8 weeks but i hadn't miscarried, so i had to have a miscarrige 'performed' in hospital. i was so depressed and tryed desperatly for another baby. it put so much pressure on my marriage that it started to pull me and my husband apart. after 6 months my husband refused to try anymore as it was upsetting him to see me get more depressed. we agreed to leave it a year and then start trying again, so i put it at the back of my mind and focussed on getting myself healthy and get my marriage back on track. during this time i fell pregnant without trying. i found out i was pregnant last nov, exactly 1 year after i miscarried (6 months before we were going to try!) i now have a beautiful baby girl and know that i only fell pregnant because i was relaxed and focussed on other things. so my only advice as hard as it seems is to try and relax, it will happen for you. good luck! x

Sammy - posted on 11/25/2009

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Im sorry to hear about your loss...
I miscarried at 8 weeks, I was given two options 1. to let it run its course or 2. have a D&C. I was told that if everything didnt come out it is harder to fall pregnant. So i ended up having the D&C. We waited 4 months before we tried again and fell first go.
Dont give up hun, it will happen when it is ment to.
(a few weeks after i miscarried i found out i had skin cancer, if i didnt miscarry i would had to of chosen my life or my unborn babys..so just remember everything happens for a reason!) =)

Jillian - posted on 11/25/2009

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i miscarried in january and didnt get pregnant again til june, its very hard and upsetting but when your finally ok with it it'll happen

Melissa - posted on 11/25/2009

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Dear Christine,
I am so sorry about your miscarriage. It is such a hard thing and most of the time, we have so many unanswered questions. I have had a still born son and a miscarriage, so I understand what you are feeling. We tried for each child we had and I have learned a lot along the way. If you are using ovulation predictor kits and it says that you are not ovulating, then you may not be...which would make it impossible for you to become pregnant. I went through this and some of my harderst emotional times every month happened when it was impossible for me to become pregnant. Your doctor needs to know about this because there are things you can do. You can take a progesterone pill or a pseudo progesterone form. I had a funny reaction to the real deal, so we went the man-made route. It worked for me and I was able to get a period that was a result of ovulation, so we were able to begin trying for real. You should have all your levels checked and your thyroid too, just to be sure there are no underlying causes for this to be happening. Try to remember that only 80% of couples get pregnant in under a year, the rest take longer, perhaps up to 2 years. I know you don't want to hear that now, but it may help give you perspective on this journey you are on. You aren't alone in this. Hang in there. XOXO

Katie - posted on 11/25/2009

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My story is a little different but maybe it will help I had a miscarriage at 17 weeks and they told me the same thing.. that I could start trying that next cycle, but I have heard to wait a little longer because it gives the wall of your uterus a chance to recouperate. we miscarried in July and tried again in December and got pregnant right away. Just keep trying it will happen when the time is right.. Good luck.

Tricia - posted on 11/25/2009

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Hi Christine. I am sorry about your miscarriage. I've had at least 2 (one at 6 weeks and one at 9 weeks) and likely one more that was a little earlier and not confirmed prego... I would just like to encourage you to try to relax. After my first miscarriage I became convinced that I would not be able to carry a child. It took several months for me to conceive again - and that only happened after I had given up hope and stopped trying and just started enjoying my husband again. Take care sweetie, and take comfort and joy in your hubby as you wait for your baby to join you. :)

[deleted account]

I'm sorry...I had a miscarriage last year the week before Christmas, and didn't conceive again until April. Your body will tell you when it's ready, and you won't get pregnant until it is. Everyone is different, so don't stress about it. And you may just not be ovulating...I used a ovulation kit in Feb and March and I didn't ovulate either month. Hope it happens soon for you - best wishes!

Jennifer - posted on 11/25/2009

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Hi Christine, Sorry about your loss. I had a miscarriage at 9 wks about 5 yrs ago and eventually had to have a D & C because the bleeding wouldn't stop. My doctor told me not to try getting pregnant until the 4th month after the miscarriage because your body needs that much time to get back to normal. Sure enough we got pregnant that 4th month, but have your doctor check to be sure there aren't any other issues. I ended up getting a blood clot in my leg that next pregnancy and have to have blood thinner shots in my stomach to maintain healthy pregnancies. BTW- My miscarriage was right in the middle of my 4 children so the blood clotting issue wasn't discovered till my 4th pregnancy.

Justine - posted on 11/25/2009

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for me, my pregnancy wasnt planned and this was a suprise because i only ovulate 3-4 times a year. if you have always been normal in the past, the major up and sudden down of hormones can throw it off, and you can still bleed even if you dont ovulate, as well as the other way around (you can ovulate even if you dont bleed). i had a miscarrage in august 2007 at 8 weeks and it was almost a year before i started to see a pattern again (at wich point i got pregnant so it threw them off again, but thats beside the point). basically im trying to say it could be a little while til you ovulate regularily again.

Christina - posted on 11/25/2009

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It took me 5 months after a mc to get pregnant again. I was getting frustrated as well as nothing was working. What worked for us was doing it every other day for one month (once my period was over), that way there was no way to miss the ovulation as nothing seemed to pinpoint it. Sure enough 9 months later we had a beautiful little girl!

Candice - posted on 11/25/2009

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Try not to stress about it (I know first hand how hard it can be). Your body (and heart) needs time to heal before trying to get pregnant again. We waited 5 months before we started to try again. Best of Luck.

Michelle - posted on 11/25/2009

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Christine, Im so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I dont know if i can be much help but i know what you are going through. I had a miscarriage in march of 2008. i was devistated because i wanted another baby so bad. for over a year i have cried myself to sleep too many times to count. It is a heart breaking thing to go through. Especially when you have a older child who keeps saying she is going to have a baby brother. even to this day i cant get my daughter to understand that im not having a baby anymore. anyway, just know that you are not alone in this heartbreak. The hurt wont go away but it gets easier to function with time. I still cry for my baby i lost. And not being able to get pregnant again just makes it harder. I have been trying to get pregnant ever since. The doctors say i should be able to, there is nothing physically wrong that would make it hard to get pregnant. but for some reason it hasnt happened. Just keep your head up and dont lose hope.

Cristina - posted on 11/25/2009

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Hi, I went through it and it's hard, but you know? as soon as we stopped trying it happened, when you are so focused on it for some reason you begin to stress about it and it just wont happen, try letting go for a bit relax with the hubby and just do some romantic things for you both and when you least expect it, boom a baby. hope it helps.

Joanne - posted on 11/25/2009

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Hi Christine, I miscarried and it took exactly 12 months to fall pregnant again. We were eager to fall again and I think it did put a bit of pressure and stress on me which does make your ovulation out of whack. We were about to start IVF but fell naturally (around new year when I was off work and relaxed). Maybe see if you guys can take some time out and get away from everything - it may help..

Bridget - posted on 11/25/2009

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I actually thought it was supposed to be opposite. I thought you would be more fertile after a miscarriage. I do know that stress can effect you getting pregnant. I would talk to your doctor to see what's going on. I wish you luck.

Angie - posted on 11/25/2009

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Learn a few natural family planning techniques. It uses at least 2 different things to determine when you are ovulating. This way you will have a better idea of when and if you are ovulating. You will only need a thermometer, your fingers and your eyes....

Angie - posted on 11/25/2009

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Learn a few natural family planning techniques. It uses at least 2 different things to determine when you are ovulating. This way you will have a better idea of when and if you are ovulating. You will only need a thermometer, your fingers and your eyes....

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