MY 6 YEAR OLD NEPHEW IS BEING SEXUALLY ABUSED

Anna - posted on 01/25/2012 ( 17 moms have responded )

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I am an aunt ( sister of father) of a 6 years old boy who is being sexually molested by his maternal grandfather ( and the mother was aware of it) and physically and mentally abused by his mother. The mother has strong history of drug addiction.The signs have been there since the time he was 2 1/2 year old but in the wildest of my imagination, I could never even think of it. It was only when the child said it very clearly, we could relate those signs to what was happening.

The boy mentioned it to me and we reported it to CPS and after my nephew was sent back to his mother's house. He was interviewed by CPS and the child said he lied. I am very sure that he was threatened to secure his silence by his mom and grandfather and the child said he lied about it.

The court case was closed as the mother manipulated the whole thing to look like a custody case. The father doesn't want mother to get into trouble so he is not pursuing it strongly. Also the father gave a constant update to the mother on what was happening on this side - the child telling us what he has to go through at his mother's house not with the intent of harming the child but probably questioning the mother and this added to the failure of the case because the mother used the same information against the father and threatened the child not to mention that ever again.

Please advise if I tell this to the legal authorities will the father be penalized although he was not involved in any kind of abuse happening to the child. Secondly, I do not want the little boy to be sent to foster home under any circumstances.

I am really concerned about the saftey of the child. I don't know what to do.

I am worried about the child. The child is at high risk of physical and emotional harm. Please advise what do I do to protect the little boy. Nobody will listen to me because I am not a mother or father of the child.

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Krista - posted on 01/25/2012

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Thank goodness that poor little boy at least has SOMEONE looking out for him. I would strongly advise you to contact a family lawyer and tell him or her everything, and ask what you can do to get the child out of this situation. The lawyer should be able to work with Social Services and the police, and hopefully get something happening. In the meantime, document everything. Every single thing that you remember that even looks REMOTELY suspicious, write it down with as much detail as you can. If you know of anybody at all who can corroborate what you're saying, then let the lawyer know about that, too.



Good luck -- my heart is breaking for that poor little boy, and I hope that he gets away from those evil people soon!

Anna - posted on 01/27/2012

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Yes Jane, No matter what I am never going to give up on the little boy. Talking to the father is not going to work. He doesn't want to get into legal issues and lose his peace of mind. I am ashamed how my brother could give up on the little soul that is suffering.

I will keep you all informed on what happens.

You all have added up to my strength. I hope God also gets on our side.

Gina - posted on 01/26/2012

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Every one has had good advice.

Please don't give up on that little boy. Talk to your brother and explain what has happened. See the child's teacher, he's doctor, anyone who might be able to provide evidence and get the child removed from his mum's care.

I like Jane's advice about acting when the mum's got drugs in her system.



This child is scared and needs your help. From past experience I know this is really hard and I wish you all the strength and courage for you to save your nephew.

Please let us know what happens.

Barb - posted on 01/26/2012

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oh that poor darling. My advice is pretty much the same as everyone else. document everything, photograph everything. be extremely supportive of your brother. Perhaps both of you go speak with a family lawyer.



Do you live in the U.S.? If so, many counties have a place where abused children go to talk with a pediatric obstetrician, a detective, and a psychologist/psychiatrist. That information is gathered for potential charges against the person causing the harm. Next time your brother has visitation with his son, see if he can take him to this place to have him checked out by the proper authorities.

Google your county with "help for abused children" and see what comes up.



If they are in different counties/states see if you can take him to the one in the county where this happened.

Jane - posted on 01/25/2012

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"I do not want the little boy to be sent to foster home under any circumstances."



That isn't going to happen unless you are prepared to take him in yourself and CPS is willing to place him with you. If CPS decides there is abuse the child will be removed from BOTH parents until everything is sorted out.



If the child ever shows up with large bruises or major injuries at your house, take photos of the injuries and call CPS again offering the proof. If you hear of the child going to the ER for injuries, take note of the date, time and hospital and again give that to CPS as evidence. And talk to your brother about what you know for a fact is happening to his son and help him make a plan to get his son out of there.



If need be, wait until you know for sure that your SIL has drugs in her system or in her possession and call CPS and the cops.

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17 Comments

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Jessica - posted on 02/12/2014

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I no it's your brother but tell him fuck his ex do what he had to four his son before he loses him

Anna - posted on 11/21/2012

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Thanks Donna, There should be some provisions in the law that should require to assure the safety of a child even if the perpetrator is not sent to jail because of the investigators falling for lies the perpetrator tells them. On the contrary the child is handed over to the abuser so that he never says again what came out accidentally. When a child knows he has to stay with the abuser and he has to face more abuse if he doesn't do what he's been asked to, the child will do exactly as he is instructed by abuser. I wonder if these professionals think of these suffering children even once before they peacefully go to sleep in the night without an ounce of guilt.

Mother is an angel for any child and protects him from all harm and fights the whole world to keep her child safe, she is the one who holds his little finger and help him out of all difficulties he faces but what does a child do when the mother is the reason for all the sexual, physical, mental and emotional abuse? It's very painful to sit and watch this all happening to the little boy I love so much.

Donna - posted on 11/21/2012

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This is just awful anna,the poor liittle boy,what a disgusting world we live in,i only hope and pray something gets done because that little kid is sure suffering.all my love anna

Anna - posted on 11/21/2012

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Hi Kelly, The boy is still suffering - the only difference is his lips are zipped up concerening abuse. He is scared to talk about it as has been threatened to keep silent about it. It's a shame, our laws are so week. Cannot protect a child's basic human rights. The attorneys, therapists, CPS etc etc are not there for protection of these little beings that cannot protect themselves but only to earn their living from the job they are doing. They are insensitive to whatever happened to the name in the files they close based on their superficial investigations. How easy it is for a criminal / borderline parent / abuser to manipulate all these professionals into believing what they want them to believe. The mother even tried to bring up false allegations against the father and me in the therapy. The child even happened to mention innocently in the interview that the mother told him to say it and if he did so, she will take him to disneyland and lots of fun places.

Mother has done everything from dropping baits to physically torture the boy to get him to say and do what she wanted.



Also recently the mother had a child pornography raid at her house. Although they didn't find anything BUT all of us know how easy it is to hide a tiny little video chip in a secret spot in our house that even a family member can't find. In a 2 hour search, the Federal agents could have easily missed what they were there to find. Obviously a criminal is smarter than everybody else !



I stopped believing in God. I begged and begged him to save the little boy. Obviously God doesn't exist or millions of children like my Nephew wouldn't be suffering this unbearable pain.

Anna - posted on 01/26/2012

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Thank you Barb and Jane for your advice. I just hope and pray that we are able to save the child ASAP.

Anna - posted on 01/25/2012

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Thank you so much Krista. I will do everything I can, in my capacity to get the child out of the terrible situation



Thanks Jamie, I have sent her a message. Hope to hear from her soon.

[deleted account]

i just sent my friend a link to your thread and unless the link didn't work i sent you a message with a link to her profile so that you can contact her if she doesn't contact you. i really hope she can help, and i'm sorry i'm not much help otherwise.

[deleted account]

i have a friend on CoM who may be able to help you, she has been involved with a similar case. let me see if i can't get her to talk to you or you to her...

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