My daughter is saying all the girls hate her in her grade 4 class... she is having a birthday party and none of them want to come... how do I comfort her...it's breaking my heart :(

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Faye - posted on 05/30/2013

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I had this happen to me in the 4th grade. All girls were invited, all girls were "informed" by the popular girl not to attend my party, some girls listened to her while others did not and attended anyway. I am glad to say that the girls which attended my party that year are still my friends today.

The girls which want to attend will. They will not say anything at school about attending the party but they will attend.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/30/2013

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I hate this for your daughter. I think most of us have been in this exact situation. It is awful. Best thing to do? Get her involved in activities with her age group outside of school, so she gets to meet new friends and help her get over the class mates. It is hard navigating through the mean girls at school, but if she has an outlet outside of school, it really may help her self esteem.

Shalina - posted on 05/29/2013

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Thanks Jodi, I wanted to try to let my daughter resolve the situation herself but now I'm realizing that something else must be going on at the school... she did tell me that one of the girls in her class has a lot of influence on the other girls in her class so whatever she says goes kind of thing.. she has advised the others not to attend my daughters birthday and many of them are listening...

Jodi - posted on 05/25/2013

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If your daughter has no friends who want to come to her party from her class, I think you need to discuss the situation with her teacher. Clearly there are some friendship issues. This does seem to be the age where girls begin to go through the politics of being female. I know when my own daughter comes home from school and says something like "Amy doesn't want to be my friend any more", I just roll my eyes and know it will be over by tomorrow. But if your daughter has a situation where she has no friends, and this is an ongoing source of sadness for her, perhaps the teacher can advise you as to what is happening and why? Only by getting to the root of the problem can you then address it.

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