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my daughters father lives in VA, im moved to VA also so he could experience the Drs appts. and her birth. But im moving back to NC after she is born to be closer to my family. How do we deal with long distance parenting?

Patrice - posted on 03/07/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Paulette - posted on 03/07/2009

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I need to correct the part where I said about taking part in both. I mean in the childs' life and the appointments and such. =0)

Paulette - posted on 03/07/2009

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It sounds like you have made the sacrific to be in VA for the dr visits and birth. What I think you could do is sit down with the father of your baby and let him know that you need the support of your family and that is why your moving back to NC. Tell him the reason for this talk is so that you both iron out the details of what will be after the birth and after you move back to NC. Let him know that you want him to take part in both of your childs' life. I would have 2 (one each of you) special calenders for this purpose only with (baby stickers if you chose as to lighten the mood of things) a pen. Then I would look at his work schedule and think about how your schedule would be like. If you'll be working, the baby appointments~keeping in mind the appointments will be 1 week after birth-2 months-4 months-6 months-9 months and 12 months, etc. (1 week is a wellness check and the rest is for immunizations plus wellness) I would consider that there are other things to factor in too. My suggestion is try to be patient and flexible with each other because there are going to be a lot of emotions to go through and handle Take care.

Ruth - posted on 03/07/2009

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You have to do what is best for you and your family.  NC is not that far away.  You guys can take turns doing weekend trips.  Both parties have to be willing to do whatever it takes and make it work.  Be willing to share holidays and birthdays.  Set up summer visits when the child is old enough.  It doesnt have to be hard as long as both side are willing to make sacrifices and time to visit

Gabby - posted on 03/07/2009

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the same way you deal with parenting in the same city. As a mom, By yourself. no seriously you don't expect too much from the other person. Have plenty of patience. Long distance is hard so never let anything pertaining to you and the dad affect the parent that is away relationship with the child.

include the dad in decision making. Even if you end up having to do it alone always include him so he feels apart of the childs life.

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