My to be step son has been wetting the bed recently.

Patricia - posted on 11/05/2010

How long had he stopped before he went back to wetting? Did the break up between mom and dad happen after he was initially potty trained? I have a 10 year old that is now on medication because he truly has a problem, and it took a while for his dad and even me to come to grips with it. Although I did accept it sooner than my husband. But my son was not initially potty trained, he has always had "accidents". My 13 year old has Down syndrome and was potty trained both day and night by age 4 -5. My six year old is now potty trained but I think his issue was that his big brother wet or wore night time under ware so it was cool bit since he has been on his medicine and stopped wetting my 6 year suddenly stopped too. Every child is different and as grown ups it is up to us to remember this, but at the same time if your soon to be son stopped wetting the bed at night and had been stopped for a while then started again there might be something there. He may need to go talk to someone (professionally). If you are affiliated with the military then I can say that counseling on base is free. Hope this helps. Good Luck.

Teresa - posted on 11/05/2010

Rachel brings up a good point. One of my girls started sleepwalking at around 5. She only does it when she needs to pee. Sometimes she would head straight to the bathroom, but many other times she would wander around doing all sorts of odd things until my ex or I would walk her into the bathroom. She would have no clue what she was doing.

Lyndsay - posted on 11/05/2010

Usually behaviour like this is a sign of something bigger, especially since it is frequent and seems to have come out of nowhere. I would be doing some investigating.

Amanda - posted on 11/05/2010

Sounds like hes sleep pee'ing, my bother use to do this. He would pee in drawers, garbage cans, anything but the toilet in his sleep. It started right around your boys age. There isnt much we did other then clean it up daily, and remind him he needs to wake up when hes pee'ing LOL. He did grow out of it, he is 28 year old who no longer pees in garbage cans at night time.

Laura - posted on 11/05/2010

The problem with bed-wetting is there are often multiple variables to consider. Physiology, behavior, and environment can all play a role. Your soon-to-be step son is at the age where growth can be a big factor, especially with the occassional relapse. Bed-wetting can also be an indicator of behavioral/emotional issues. And for some reason (buried deep in our DNA, no doubt), cold air can trigger the urge to go! Then there's the old "hand in warm water" prank! The point is that any one of these factors, or a combination of them, could be at work here. I would suggest having a discussion with your doctor/pediatrician about possible causes and possible solutions (other than just wearing diapers/pull-ups). This may be one of those phases that he is "growing" through and patience and understanding may be the best practice. Good luck with this!

Rachel - posted on 11/05/2010

Maybe he's dreaming that he's getting up and peeing in the toilet, but not really making it that far. That would make sense of why he's actually getting out of bed... or maybe he's extra tired for some reason and just not waking up enough to go to the potty. Good luck.

Angie - posted on 11/04/2010

I had a friend who left her daughter with a sig other while she worked. The other was harming the child, the child chose to attempt a defense by urinating and then sitting in the stench and wet. She wouldn't move from the spot until the mother returned. It took the mother weeks to figure it out. - Not saying anything for you guys, but sometimes kids' bodies react when their minds cannot communicate something it needs to. Maybe there's more to it? Sorry if I've creeped you out... just something that came to mind. I would try spending one night in bed with him, before he goes to sleep, through to morning. See what happens.

Kelina - posted on 11/04/2010

Might sound odd but how warm is his room? And is he aware he's doing it? My best friends little brother growing up would always pee the bed when we were camping and if his window was open at night because he was cold. Same for the two boys I used to watch who wet the bed. AS soon as i closed their window at night, Voila! They stopped wetting the bed. Their mom was pretty surprised at that.
If he's aware of it though, it's probably a behavioural thing. When he wets the bed at his moms does she tell him the same thing that you do, or does she get angry with him? When did he start going to grandmas before school? When is your wedding? has anything happened recently in his life that could have triggered this response?

Teresa - posted on 11/04/2010

Hmm... Mysterious. Does he seem angry, withdrawn, or anything during the day? Any discipline problems at home or school? Sorry. I think I'm out of ideas.

Jillian - posted on 11/04/2010

Thank you Teresa, I know it's normal for lots of kids, my bio son is 4, he's been potty trained 5 days less than my step-son(which makes it a year earlier) and he wears, and wets a pull up on a nightly basis. Sometimes even soaks through it. They both stop drinking after dinner (between 5 and 6pm depending on the night), and are in bed by 7:30. (at our house, Mom's is much less set and scheduled, but at least 8:30) They have a sip from the whale (a faucet spout) after brushing teeth, then it's book, and all 3 kids get up and go pee. My 2 step kids are out the minute their head hits pillow, just like their dad. My son and I, not so much.. we toss, we turn, and if we're lucky eventually sleep. Logan hasn't peed the bed in over a year. We have all lived together since march of 2009, and our lives are pretty much the same day in day out. We have his kids 4 nights a week, T,W,Fr,& Sa. Of all the accidents he's been having, we put him in a pull up after each one just to be safe, he is reminded over and over he's not in trouble and it's ok, and asked if he wants to talk. Every time he wakes up with a dry pull up, last night, we decided not to go the pull up route. He woke up SOAKED. Head to toe. Where all the urine came from I am not sure. Technically, he's not really wetting the bed, well, last ngiht he did. But actually, he's gettting up, peeing his pants, to the floor and getting back in bed. We have a night light, and I get home from work most nights between 8:30 and 9, I check on the kids no later than 945. He's been wet as early as 845. He pees after dinner, after shower and teeth, and RIGHT before bed. His blood sugar is normal, no infection. His PH was a little high about a month ago, and has been fine since with switched out his watered down juice out got straight water.

Angie - posted on 11/03/2010

My guess... aside from the shuffling and instability that sounds like he's being asked to deal with right now, it's probably a growth period. My daughter is going through it right now too. She prefers something to drink before sleep and I really would prefer she not, but I'm not going to refuse her thirst. So, instead, I get up with her about 6 hours after she falls asleep and take her to pee most nights. There are nights that she wakes me with little fussiness and lots of tossing/turning; she co-sleeps in a bed next to ours, so I am aware of her while asleep.

I suspect this is a stage, similar to when she suddenly needed to eat something substantial in the middle of the night. I have researched the body and its growth patterns and discovered that at some point around this age, their stomachs actually grow faster than before and are out of proportion to their bladders. This results in a need/desire for food and water, and consequently frequent urination and daily bowel emptying (often of substantial quantity).

I would suggest encouraging him to make sure he pees moments before sleep (not just lying down, but sleep). I'd also suggest rolling with it and never complaining at him for either a wet bed or the need to pee at night. Put a night light in the bathroom and on the way there. Even better, get a JohnnyLight for the toilet bowl too! My little one loves it (so does husband).

Give him time and let him openly talk about it. Encourage him to eliminate as necessary (and more frequently than perhaps he thinks is necessary, which will train his body to eliminate when at the toilet, even if it is barely necessary). And most importantly, be patient, never condescending or negative, and don't even let him know it's annoying, as he will interpret that as him being annoying. Good luck!

Teresa - posted on 11/03/2010

So he's about 5 now? If I had to guess I'd say either a bladder infection or too much emotional upheaval in his little life.



Bedwetting is certainly normal for a lot of kids, but it doesn't seem like the normal case of bedwetting if he's had dry nights for about a year now. If he were just wetting on rare occasion I'd say normal, but being this frequent after so long of being dry.... something is going on either physically or emotionally.



If you're about to be 'stepmom' you'd better matter in there somewhere or it doesn't sound like a good place for YOU to be in.



Good luck!