Nursing for 6-8 years??

Erinn - posted on 06/27/2009 ( 705 moms have responded )

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I just heard that in some countries, nursing for 6-8 years is normal... I can not imaine nursing my nursing my children for that long!!!! What are your thoughts??

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Minnie - posted on 06/27/2009

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Early puberty is caused by a number of factors, but is not a normal occurance in a natural setting: chemicals in the environment, obesity, natural and synthetic hormones found in food, processed foods, lead, and infants born to mothers who were exposed to certain toxic chemicals.

Like Kate said, children do not view breasts as sexual, unless an adult impresses those ideals upon them. I can quite clearly recall taking baths with my mother at age five, and I remember her naked. But I have nothing but those memories. To me, it was just an enjoyable, comfortable way to be close to my mother. I'm not traumatized, or 'mentally damaged' lol.

Please provide evidence that long-term breastfeeding damages the 'mental health' of children.

And I never once compared other animals in my post. I mentioned that the human immune system becomes fully functional at about the same time that children's first adult teeth come in.

Kate - posted on 06/27/2009

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A nursing child who is 6 - 8 years old does NOT share adult hang-ups about sexuality. Believe me. Unless you teach them that they SHOULD be ashamed of their bodies and their nursing behavior, they won't see it that way at all.

I don't anticipate that my kids will need to nurse that long, but if they do...then they will. My primary goal is to meet my kids' needs. Now...since most kids don't breastfeed that long, they seek comfort in other ways. They want to cuddle, to talk, they turn to friends or activities, etc. Most cultures in this world don't encourage independence nearly as soon as we do. And we shouldn't. Kids need to know that no matter how old they are, their parents are there for them. Even super independent kids have times they just need to be held. Some kids find that comfort at the breast and others don't.

But breasts are NOT necessarily sexual, and developing breasts is not a reason to wean a child who is not ready. In fact, being open about sexuality is highly encouraging.

I plan to let my children self-wean. I also plan to let them witness all of my births if they want to (starting with my baby who is due in 4 weeks, I will be having my babies at home). People might think I am crazy, that to allow a child to watch me in labor/birth is crazy and they'll be freaked out, and then to tandem nurse them on top of it is insane. There are tons of people who are so privacy-driven that they'd never be comfortable with any of this. Which is fine -- for them.

But, although people believe these practices are "weird" and sexual and will screw children up, that is not the case. My midwife, whose kids are all in their 30s and 40s now, witnessed their siblings' births and tandem nursed, and self-weaned. She says that even today there is a very special, unique bond between them. I am really looking forward to that type of bond between my children, and between them and myself. I believe it does create a very strong, unbreakable bond that leads to very open communication when they are older and a very practical view on sexuality. Because of course sexuality is not just about having sex, but one's feelings about nakedness, the body's functions, etc. It would just be fantastic if my whole house were full of people who were open about their sexuality and not ashamed of themselves and their bodies...even though we teach "no sex before marriage." I think that opening this dialogue and showing what adult sexuality can and should be will help them to understand why we believe this.

Breastfeeding in an extended manner is just one helpful part of this lifestyle.

Alexx - posted on 06/29/2009

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It's abnormal in North America simply because almost NOBODY breastfeeds anymore. If you think about it, we're the only species of mammal that weans our young before their milk teeth (that first set) is gone!

Most children (like.. the VAST majority) will self-wean anywhere from 2-4 years. Which is NORMAL.

There is no right age to wean. Breastmilk NEVER loses its benefits.

Sonia - posted on 07/07/2009

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Oh the shock! Oh the horror! LOL.



Seriously though, the biologically normal age for weaning is somewhere between 2-7 years old with the average between 2.5-4 years, as I understand from Katherine Dettwyler's research. A child who is self weaned is most likely to be done by 4. Some children make that transition much slower. Personally, I believe in child-led weaning. I don't really like nursing a child past 3-4, but I do respect my kiddos timetable and needs.



Breastmilk never stops providing an impressive array of nutritents, growth factors and immune factors. In fact, I've heard of breastmilk being used for adult cancer patients (though I believe that is usually pumped milk LOL). So, breastmilk is always beneficial even when there's "regular" food available. Breastfeeding, especially beyond infancy, is so much more than just about nutrition though. It provides a really comfort for the child. That need for comfort is just as valid as the need to eat. Of course, there are other ways to comfort, but nursing's a perfectly normal way to do it.



Culture influences us so much. In the US, we rarely see women nursing at all. The breastfeeding rates are ridiculous. And the number of babies who are even nursed a full year is tiny. Breasts are super sexualized in our culture as well. This makes it so difficult for many ppl to see breasts in their functional aspect as well. Yes, breasts can be sexy and sensual. However, they are not sex organs any more than are our mouths or hands. While any part of the body can be sexy, that doesn't mean those parts are automatically private parts. Breasts are awesome. They serve an incredible purpose. The whole sexy aspect is a bonus, but not the main point.



So, when folks are rarely exposed to breastfeeding at all, let alone breastfeeding beyond infancy...they often don't know how to react. I think the disgust reaction comes from the conflict between our Puritanical values and our oversexed culture (which I think has roots in the reaction to the Puritanism). Forbidden fruit and all that. If breastfeeding were the norm, it would seem a lot less freaky. The more often ppl are exposed to the idea, the less radical it usually seems.



Again, children who are allowed to wean at their pace most often wean by 4 at the latest. Some children go longer. Nothing wrong with that. It's all about individual needs.

Guggie - posted on 07/02/2009

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Quoting Amanda :

I am so damn sick and tired of reading all this garbage from all the breast feeding nazis. they seriously make us mothers who use formula feel like shit. you all make it seem like formula is poision and that cows milk for our families is like feeding them desile fuel (cows milk on another thread but SAME group of breast feeding nazis) maybe formula is not good in 3rd world countries and perhaps the USA as I heard of some contamination there but in most developed countries formual is safe and good for babies. I am so anoyed that everytime someone posts something encouraging to a formula feeding mom there has to be a breast bitch pipe up with some ass hair comment about breast fedding. shit, we ALL know the benefits of breast feeding, we ALL know that " there are 300 unknown antibodies in breast milk" blah blah blah blah blah. We all know it breast bags so why do you all got to keep drilling it in. christ if I want to know the billions of benefits of breast milk than I will buy that huge ass book that the lalech league put out. this is not a bloody debate it is a bunch of "im better than you because my family is all natural" show down. you guys are like vultures and its really sick. your worse than tele marketers. I mean does making the rest of us feel like shit give you more power to produce an infinate supply of boob juice.
breast feed your children if you can by all means but dont make thoes of us who cant or choose not to feel like worthless pieces of garbage.



Everyone is entitled to their opinion on a public message board. That being said I think you are quite lucky to be on COM when posting that offensive and racist/discriminatory remark, as other forums would penalize or even end your membership.



No one can make you feel bad except for you. Do not put the blame of your choices on my back. I will keep promoting the truth about science and medical fact as long as people continue to post myths, misleading statements and old wives tales stated as truth. You may have made your choice, and that is yours to live with, but others have not made their choice yet and they have a right to make an informed decision with all the facts available to them.



 



Elie Wiesel, a Jew who was captured and forced into Auschwitz at the age of 15 and survived it (his mom, dad and little sisters all died in the camp) wrote a book called "Night" about his torture in the camp. Here is one of his quotes:



 



"I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." -Elie Wiesel





This seems to be a fitting quote for this entire thread.

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Elissa - posted on 07/15/2009

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I hope you're joking about the sex thing. It is important for married couples to have sex, and a lot of people would kill to have a spouse who still wanted them like that after 10 years. What kind of a crazy person doesn't want sex?

Elissa - posted on 07/15/2009

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I think if your kid can tell you that he/she is hungry, that child is too old. I was breastfed as a baby, and I am glad I can't remember it.

Elissa - posted on 07/15/2009

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I think if your kid can tell you that he/she is hungry, that child is too old. I was breastfed as a baby, and I am glad I can't remember it.

[deleted account]

My thoughts are NO WAY. Children nursed past the age of two are at risk for dental problems and also developmental problems. By age one, a child needs to be learning to use a sippy cup and bottle feeding or nursing needs to be slowly coming to an end. Certainly by age two, children should not be getting their primary source of nutrition from nursing of any kind. It is a developmental issue if nursing extends beyond the second year in my opinion. I do hold a degree in child development and psychology. I have seen the outcome of prolong nursing for both mother and child and I can tell you that it is not favorable. Letting go and allowing a child room to grow and achieve independence is healthy and necessary. If I see a child nursing past the two year mark, I immediately feel that the issues at hand revolve around the adult...not the child.

Christina - posted on 07/15/2009

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There are many helpful, factual responses and they're all great. But the fact of the matter is that people do things differently.



I am all about breastfeeding, the benefits to both mother and child, physically and emotionally are significant. I weaned my daughter 3 months ago, when she was 1 1/2. My original goal was to breastfeed for at least the first year. I am a firm-believer in doing it for the recommended first 6 months if possible.



I saw a short documentry "Taboo" on women breastfeeding for longer, and one Australian mother, I believe, had 2 sons, one was 8 and the other 7. It was a strange situation, because she had been nursing the 7 yr old since he was an infant, but she stopped nursing the older son once the second came along. I mean, thats confusing for both kids that age. Esp since it was just for comfort ( for mom&kid), not for health/lack of food/immune system reasons.



I'm getting my BA in psych right now and I wrote this huge paper on mother-infant attachment, having to do with working moms and stay-at-home moms. This is an excerpt on breastfeeding:

"The American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Dietetic Association, and the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services strongly endorse breastfeeding over formula feeding throughout the infant’s first year. Benefits of breastfeeding include appropriate weight gain, lowered risk of obesity, fewer allergies, prevention or reduction of diarrhea, respiratory and bacterial infections, denser bones in childhood and adulthood, reduced childhood cancer and reduced breast cancer in mothers, lower incidence of SIDS, more advanced neurological and cognitive development, and better visual acuity (Santrock, 2008, pp148). Despite these benefits and recommendations, lower than recommended levels of breastfeeding are prevalent among mothers who return to work in the first year.

A National Survey of Family Growth (1996) showed that among lower income women only initiate breastfeeding 50% of the time, and only 12% breastfeed through 6 months of age. There is a consistent relationship between early return to work and low levels of breastfeeding. Whether returning to work in order to provide financial stability or staying at home to ensure quality care, an attentive mother will make the necessary sacrifices to provide what they believe to be the best for their child. "

Kathy - posted on 07/14/2009

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that is crazy i think nursing should end the same time most ppl take there child from the bottle -12 2- 24 months

Carolina - posted on 07/14/2009

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if your child is old enough too remember the experience stop......ooh creepy! My friends husband was nursed till he was 6 and still recalls...I can't look at him the same way. p.s the immune thing is only in the first few weeks. My first I could only feed for 3mths cause she couldn't work it out and can count on one hand how many times she's had a fever. My second couldn't get enough fed for 12mths and she is constantly pilcking up every bug going....I think it's the mums that have an issue with detachment not the baby

Leigh - posted on 07/13/2009

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Interesting reading, mainly what I'm picking up is that it's just the 'thought', of the child being able to help themselves when there seems to be no need. Each to their own I say, I think western cultures are conditioned to find this 'different', just like when Salma Hayic went & breastfed a baby that wasn't hers.

I've watched a family member breastfeed her children until they were quite old (one was 6) she would come home from school & go straight to her Mum for a feed. Never thought anything of it until I read this thread, just thought it was part of nature.

Minnie - posted on 07/11/2009

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Quoting Jill:

That's insane and crosses the line into something sick and twisted.Jill




I think it's amusing how people come into this thread spouting this attitude, and yet if breastfeeding mothers were to give FACTS in a thread concerning formula feeding all of the formula feeding mothers would cry JUDGEMENT!!!!  And even on THIS thread of all threads women have blamed others for being judgemental towards formula feeders, simply because they provided facts....double standard....

Rebecca - posted on 07/11/2009

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this society today is verry judgemental i dont see why all you women a have a bitch session when this question should be a dicussion some women think iits the right thing to do and sooner all later it may come to the fact where it might be the thing that we might have to do considering on the fact that more and more reseach is going into it and yeah children are healthier and sometimes smarter. its alight to give a opion but somethings people should just leave it alone

Rebecca - posted on 07/11/2009

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i wouldnt i did it with my first and second untill she was 15months only because she refused the bottle my other two did it for 6weeks couldnt stand it i know its good for them but seriously i think its a bit wrong their in school now i could just imagine the nasty things kids would say ............

Emma - posted on 07/11/2009

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I think its kinda strange, i personaly think if the kid can ask for a boob, that they are too old, i think 6 months to a year max. i mean they can bite by then.

Rem - posted on 07/10/2009

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Quoting penny:

do you really want to pull lil johnny out of class just so you can nurse him


You don't really need to pull the child 'out of class' to breastfeed.. breastfeeding for older child could take place at home or evenings or weekends when mom and child just happens to be together~ :)

Rem - posted on 07/10/2009

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IMO, breastfeeding should go for as long as both the mom and the child is comfortable.. ;)

Minnie - posted on 07/10/2009

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Quoting Janel:

but the "immunization benefits" of a child older than a year are extremely small. Their own bodies create ther immunitizes that they need.



"Antibodies are abundant in human milk throughout lactation" ( 1991; p. 134). In fact, some of the immune factors in breastmilk increase in concentration during the second year and also during the weaning process. (Goldman 1983, Goldman & Goldblum 1983, Institute of Medicine 1991).

Janel - posted on 07/10/2009

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but the "immunization benefits" of a child older than a year are extremely small. Their own bodies create ther immunitizes that they need.

Janel - posted on 07/10/2009

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but the "immunization benefits" of a child older than a year are extremely small. Their own bodies create ther immunitizes that they need.

[deleted account]

I THINK THEY MEANT MULTIPLE CHILDREN. THAT LADY HAD A BUNCH OF KIDS IN A ROW, THEN SHE WOULD BE NURSING FOR THAT LONG. I HOPE THEY WERE NOT TALKING ABOUT ONE CHILD.

TinaMarie - posted on 07/10/2009

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I wish that I had had LISA as my nursing coach! Nursing didn't go well or long with my 3 girls( now 22, 21 & 15). For a few reasons: A bottle was put in their mouths in the hospital ( against my request), and the circle that a was in was not comfortable with it and I was so stressed, armed with little info. or help on the subject. One of the things I don't think we discussed here is that we have to function where we are, and here in the states, breasts are seen as private/ sexual, and nursing sadly has become akin to flashing. I am glad for those who can nurse, and appreciate their right to do so, I especial appreciate ladies who do in it a manner that respects our right NOT to see anything. My husband would sooner give himself whip lash than see another woman breast, and he wouldn't want other men to see mine. Given that this seems to be the dominant western attitude I guess we have to: preserve the right but not force it on anyone. As for the health issues, my girls were very healthy, but I would have liked to boosted their chances for better health. Back to the main subject... 6-8 yrs. is difficult to appreciate, given that these are school age children. I would guess "CREEPY" is being used because it is so different from the norm here. As to the question of bonding; I'm sure nursing does help, my experience may be unique but the bond I have with all 3 of my girls was very close and always has been. I guess we just want children who can walk , talk, feed them selves and go to school to retire the breast! We worry about the reasons it continues that long. Sometimes the Dads can get left out of the bonding when Moms nurse, but that may have more to do with the relationship than the nursing, but then again we should remember all parenting is work, and is time consuming requiring compromise and nursing Mom's seem to have even more demands. (Again ) back to those 6-8 year old children nursing , I would like to be open minded and allow the family to choose for them selves, but I wouldn't want to see it. Maybe it has to do with the size/ heights, it makes for some unusual picture in our minds, maybe because we're used to thinking of them "IN ARMS".***** Oh well, Thanks to LISA for all the great factoids. ***** God Bless You All Ladies.

Lindall - posted on 07/10/2009

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I would have to agree with the majority. It is healthier to breastfeed, however, the age of 8 is a bit much.

Laura - posted on 07/09/2009

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I can understand in a 3rd world country where that child may only have its mother as his source of nutrition, but other than that, I feel its inappropriate and unecessary.

Caroline - posted on 07/09/2009

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I nursed for 2 months until I felt like my son had daggers in his mouth. It just became too painful. But the 2 months took him through his entire childhood without any major medical problems. He had chicken pox at 2 1/2 yo but other than that, very rarely sick. Now that he is 14, his boo boos are due to his reckless actions. My sister boob fed her youngest, now 3, and probably still breast feeds him. It isn't for him because he has been a sick baby ever since he was born. I think it was because she needed to be needed having him at 40 and her other kids were already teenagers. She is selfish and probably did more damage than good.

Heather - posted on 07/09/2009

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Yikes!!! NoNoNo!! If A child can walk up to his mother and ask for a drink, he's too damn old to nurse!!!!

Krista - posted on 07/09/2009

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I remember when I started in Kindergarten, there was a girl who's mother would come at lunch time and nurse her! She was 5. And we as grown adults almost 30 years later *still* talk about it!! How is it that healthy, socially, for the poor kid!!

And as far as the whole *immunization* deal... I have 3 kids, 13, 3, & 2, and not once did I have any of them latched on to me to nurse- they were bottle fed from day 1. Anyways, my kids have a way better immune system than alot of other kids they go to daycare or school with that *were* nursed!!! So honestly I believe "that breast fed babies have a better immune system" is bogus in a lot of ways- no matter how old they are! I think your genes have a large part in how strong your immune system is.

Also I have a terrific bond with ALL 3 of my kids... its all what you make it! There are more ways to bond with your child than nursing for several years. At 6-7 years old they are starting to make bonds with peers!

But each to their own.... these are my opinions. Do what you want, it doesn`t affect me, but oh man, learn to let go mommy!!

Missy - posted on 07/09/2009

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I think it's crazy!!!!! No way!!! But if they needed the nutrition from it as if they are in a place they cant get healthy food or milk! Then pump and they can drink it from a cup!

Veronika - posted on 07/09/2009

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Quoting Lisa:



Quoting Sabrina:

I dont think I would do it for that long. But yes in other countries they do it for health reasons. In some coutries they have no baby food or formula. And the ones that do have formula do not clean water to mix it with. Not only that bottles and sterilization can be an issue. Me personally I think I will wean by age 2 at least.






Long-duration nursing is the norm in traditional societies and has been that way for millennia.  No one all of a sudden sat down and said "oops! We don't have any formula or bottles or convenient little jars of pureed processed goo!!"






 






No, long-duration breastfeeding is the biological norm.






 






http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detwean.ht...





I agree!



Thank you for your posts, Lisa and Sabrina.

Sheldean - posted on 07/09/2009

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I plan to nurse till my son is 1 1/2. But thats\ is just personal preference. I think no longer then 3 though. 6-8 is way way way to long. Not only for you baby but for your body. Breast feeding takes all of your calories and nutrients, I can hardly keep up with it right now!

Phyllis - posted on 07/09/2009

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Most children are no longer interested in nursing at that age. Both my daughters self weined by the age of 2.5,

Phyllis - posted on 07/09/2009

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Most children are no longer interested in nursing at that age. Both my daughters self weined by the age of 2.5,

Peggy - posted on 07/09/2009

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Hi Erinn,

I have heard of breastfeeding for many years. My ob encouraged me to breastfeed my last child for 5 years. I did breastfeed her for 2 years...and then needed to give it up. She would have continued for at least a year or more after that. She would ask to nurse for quite awhile after I weaned her. I breastfed my 3 boys for 1 year only. They were easy to wean to a cup at that time. My daughter was healthier than her brothers...and I have always attributed that to breastfeeding her longer. They say that the longer you breastfeed...you protect that child's immune system even longer...into adulthood. Good luck!! Enjoy this time...and breastfeed for as long as you feel comfortable!!

Iyana - posted on 07/09/2009

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That is so gross to me. I nurse for ONE YEAR and then thats it. As muslims it it said that we can nurse for 2 years

Peggy - posted on 07/09/2009

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Hi Erinn,

I have heard of breastfeeding for many years. My ob encouragee me to breastfeed my last child for 5 years. I did breastfeed her for 2 years...and then needed to give it up. She would have continued for at least a year or more after that. She would ask to nurse for quite awhile after I weaned her. I breastfed my 3 boys for 1 year only. They were easy to wean to a cup at that time. My daughter was healthier than her brothers...and I have always attributed that to breastfeeding her longer. They say that the longer you breastfeed...you protect that child's immune system even longer...into adulthood. Good luck!! Enjoy this time...and breastfeed for as long as you feel comfortable!!

Denise - posted on 07/09/2009

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Quoting Lisa:



Quoting gretchen:

Wow, some of these replies caught me offguard. Not everyone who breastfeeds is a freak! I breastfed all 3 of my kids. All are fairly normal - what kid is normal? :-) lol. At the LaLeche meetings we all encouraged each other how to feed our babies/toddlers without exposing our boobs in public, and we learned about different cultures too. The age of weaning is unique to each child/mother. Breast milk does have antibodies, and for as long as you breastfeed your kid gets the antibodies. There have been studies done to help aids patients w antibodies from breastmilk helped them prevent colds and viruses. public opinion of socially acceptable ages varies from culture to culture. I can tell you...in arizona - in a room full of nursing toddlers - the 4yr old who was still nursing was thought of as too old by the moms. In the mom's defense - her son had a lot of food allergies and she felt it helped him. He seemed ok with it too.

I personally let my kids selfwean. The girls were done at about a year old to a year and 1/2. My son was two when he finally left me alone. My stepmom has a daughter with downsyndrome who nursed until 3 1/2, and only 'cause my stepmom forced her to wean. If she had not, and let her "self-wean" who knows - she'd probably gone a lot longer.

As for the husband who thinks sex is for procreation only and after 5-10yrs of marriage sex isn't needed....can I get me one of those guys? My hubbie is going strong after over 10yrs of marriage and can't seem to get enough. I keep picturing 80yrs old and him still not leaving me alone...eeww. lol :-)






HAHAHA I  am married ten years too and my hubbie is the same as yours, I can  see us in the retirement home with a towel tied to the door knob for privacy lol





LOL   Are your husbands any kin to mine?  We have been married for almost 16 years,  and I don't know if it's true that guys hit their prime a lot later than women or not, but I think my husband has been "prime" for 16 years and still is!!!  hehehe  It is kind of nice sometimes though!

Stacey - posted on 07/09/2009

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You all might as well be talking about politics or religion...This isn't going anywhere and everybody is getting all excited and defensive. Move on...talk about something different.

[deleted account]

Are these other countries 3rd world? If so, it makes sense up to about 3 to 5 for lack of food. In extreme cases, I can see where up to 8 is considered ok. Also if they don't have any type of birth control, that might be another reason it is considered acceptable because lactation helps in not getting pregnant (not 100% though).

Kirin - posted on 07/09/2009

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I don't think extended nursing itself is going to screw up a kid sexually (see million posts that mention that sexuality is a learned behavior). However - and this is for you boobmongers - you'd best give your kids some DAMN good coping skills because when the majority of society (your kids' peers in this case) hears that you insist on an attachment like that when this society does not normally do so.. they will attack your kid and THAT will screw him up for life if he can't handle it. So, fine.. nurse forever, ain't my kid. But it would seriously behoove you to examine your own needs and determine whether making your child have social difficulties isn't unkind or cruel.

Lisa - posted on 07/09/2009

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First, let me say to each his/her own.

With that said, this has turned from discussion to "bitch session". Those of you who feel it's wrong won't back down, those of you who feel it's right won't back down. At what point to we just say, "let's agree to disagree"? We've seen every side of this arguement.

There are those of you who feel like bad mothers because you didn't/couldn't breastfeed. Don't. Your children love you and won't stop because one day they say "You didn't breastfeed me? Who are you anyways??" Not gonna happen.

There are those of you who feel it's "creepy". Like I said at first. To each his own. "Creepy" is an odd word to use, but if that is how you feel. Fine.

There are those of you who are fighting tooth and nail saying that the benefits never stop and you will do it as long as your child will let you. Ok. Fine. Again, to each his/her own.

Since everyone is adding their .02 here is mine. An OPINION mind you. I'm not putting this up for debate or "judging" anyone.

I'm feeling a bit like a walking miracle right now. My mother never breastfed me. In fact, she smoked while she was pregnant with me. Our bond is AMAZING. I'm getting tears in my eyes as I types this just thinking about how much I love her. We talk daily and talk about EVERYTHING! I have always been a very "touchy feely" kinda girl. I like to hug. It's my thing. Also, I have hardly been sick. I have had 1 cold in the past 3 years. Even when I was young it was strange for me to get sick and it would maybe happen about once every 3 years. I'm not crazy...totally serious. I hardly ever get sick, and when I do...it's really nothing.

Now for my 3 children who are currently 3, 5 and 6. They were all premature and born by c-section. My body does not like to be pregnant arfter 30 weeks. There was alot of time spent in the hospital trying to keep them in. When the did arrive, none of their lungs were fully developed. I pumped so that they could be given the breastmilk as they had a feeding tube. I pumped for my oldest (who would NOT latch on to save her life) for 3 months. At that point, I cried everytime the pump turned on. Time to stop. My middle child was not AS premature, but still had premature lungs. I pumped for about 3-4 months, and again, had to stop. My youngest latched on perfectly or took a bottle perfectly. He didn't seem to care where it came from, as long as he got some food, he was happy! He became uninterested in breastmilk at 5 moths of age. I thought that was strange, but ok...no biggie. I stopped. He ended up having a problem with cows milk even in formula. So we had to put him on one of the most expensive soy formulas out there. Still, no biggie, but he wouldn't breastfeed anymore. My children now all LOVE cows milk AND me. I have the same amazing bond with my kids, as I did with my mother. My children are healthy, happy and like me, hardly ever sick. I'm sure there are some of you who will look at the fact that they are healthy and happy because they got that breastmilk. In my opinion, it's not. I am a very happy and healthy person without ever having had the first bit of breastmilk.

No one is right or wrong. It's what feels right to you and your child. As for putting up all of the informoation as to how much its going to screw up a child or make them more healthy, that's pointless. A lot of mothers out there have very well rounded, healthy children who are breastfed to the age of six, or not breastfed at all. In my opinion, it's all in the parenting. It's how you show your child you love them and how you share that with them. Not whether or not you choose to breastfeed.

Just my .02.

Lisa - posted on 07/09/2009

2

25

0

First, let me say to each his/her own.

With that said, this has turned from discussion to "bitch session". Those of you who feel it's wrong won't back down, those of you who feel it's right won't back down. At what point to we just say, "let's agree to disagree"? We've seen every side of this arguement.

There are those of you who feel like bad mothers because you didn't/couldn't breastfeed. Don't. Your children love you and won't stop because one day they say "You didn't breastfeed me? Who are you anyways??" Not gonna happen.

There are those of you who feel it's "creepy". Like I said at first. To each his own. "Creepy" is an odd word to use, but if that is how you feel. Fine.

There are those of you who are fighting tooth and nail saying that the benefits never stop and you will do it as long as your child will let you. Ok. Fine. Again, to each his/her own.

Since everyone is adding their .02 here is mine. An OPINION mind you. I'm not putting this up for debate or "judging" anyone.

I'm feeling a bit like a walking miracle right now. My mother never breastfed me. In fact, she smoked while she was pregnant with me. Our bond is AMAZING. I'm getting tears in my eyes as I types this just thinking about how much I love her. We talk daily and talk about EVERYTHING! I have always been a very "touchy feely" kinda girl. I like to hug. It's my thing. Also, I have hardly been sick. I have had 1 cold in the past 3 years. Even when I was young it was strange for me to get sick and it would maybe happen about once every 3 years. I'm not crazy...totally serious. I hardly ever get sick, and when I do...it's really nothing.

Now for my 3 children who are currently 3, 5 and 6. They were all premature and born by c-section. My body does not like to be pregnant arfter 30 weeks. There was alot of time spent in the hospital trying to keep them in. When the did arrive, none of their lungs were fully developed. I pumped so that they could be given the breastmilk as they had a feeding tube. I pumped for my oldest (who would NOT latch on to save her life) for 3 months. At that point, I cried everytime the pump turned on. Time to stop. My middle child was not AS premature, but still had premature lungs. I pumped for about 3-4 months, and again, had to stop. My youngest latched on perfectly or took a bottle perfectly. He didn't seem to care where it came from, as long as he got some food, he was happy! He became uninterested in breastmilk at 5 moths of age. I thought that was strange, but ok...no biggie. I stopped. He ended up having a problem with cows milk even in formula. So we had to put him on one of the most expensive soy formulas out there. Still, no biggie, but he wouldn't breastfeed anymore. My children now all LOVE cows milk AND me. I have the same amazing bond with my kids, as I did with my mother. My children are healthy, happy and like me, hardly ever sick. I'm sure there are some of you who will look at the fact that they are healthy and happy because they got that breastmilk. In my opinion, it's not. I am a very happy and healthy person without ever having had the first bit of breastmilk.

No one is right or wrong. It's what feels right to you and your child. As for putting up all of the informoation as to how much its going to screw up a child or make them more healthy, that's pointless. A lot of mothers out there have very well rounded, healthy children who are breastfed to the age of six, or not breastfed at all. In my opinion, it's all in the parenting. It's how you show your child you love them and how you share that with them. Not whether or not you choose to breastfeed.

Just my .02.

Angela - posted on 07/09/2009

41

23

2

i think its wierd. breast milk is great when young. when they reach a certain age it seems more like the mother needing that bond or connection instead of accepting they are getting older and finding other ways to connect.

Angelica - posted on 07/09/2009

1

9

0

I believe that any older than a year, is doing more harm mentally than it could ever do nutritionally. Then we wonder why there are so many adults that can not cope with the real world. Hugs are for comfort after year 1 ...not boobs.

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