Please Help :'(

Shylene - posted on 05/18/2010

omgsh thank you so much you are all so wonderful and helped me so much to have the courage and belief that i can do this, and i have, and i feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off of my shoudlers. i hope that i can continue to stay strong, in the meantime i am staying with my parents till i get back on my feet and i have alot of support. thanks again for the links i will deffinitely take a look at them. ♥

Krista - posted on 05/17/2010

I'm assuming that your ex-boyfriend is the father, so I would also contact Alberta Legal Aid, as you will need their assistance when it comes time to take him to court to get child support.
http://www.legalaid.ab.ca/Help/Pages/def...
Here is another website that should prove to be helpful:
http://www.albertacourts.ab.ca/familylaw...

If your ex-boyfriend is working up north, he's probably making pretty decent money. And child support is calculated based on the individual's ability to pay. Here's a link to the calculation tables. http://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/pi/fcy-fea/...

So hopefully, between your remaining mat leave payments, (and then your income from when you go back to work) and his child support, you should be fine.

Oh, and lastly, here's a link to the application for the Alberta Child Care subsidy: http://www.child.alberta.ca/home/documen...

Louise - posted on 05/17/2010

I just want to congratulate you for having the strength to leave the father of your child. This was a brave move and you have done the right thing for your child and yourself. Look forward and never look back. I wish you all the happiness in the world. Well done!

Charity - posted on 05/17/2010

Just stay strong and remember that you did this for your child. I know personally how hard it is to be a single parent and leave someone you love beacuse they are an addict. I have had to do this also. But I just flat out told him I was leaving becasue he wasn't willing to give up drugs for tha sake of the child. Every once in awhile I get the same old thing that he's done with everything and clean but I just look at my kids remember why I left to begin with. It's hard but so worth it when you the peace of mind that your child is not around potential dangerous situtations or even being exposed to drugs. Good luck and you will do fine.

Jane - posted on 05/17/2010

well sweetie you've made a brave decision for the sake of your baby.

Hope it all works out for you.

Shylene - posted on 05/16/2010

well i love your advice, and maybe i am getting depressed, but my bf is an alchy/ drug user and we've already got into this once, i thought he changed, and now hes right back in that game. so i can not stick it out and stay with him when i walk into my house and theres a party with ppl doing drugs and drinking, with my daughter home. its not kool. i actually packed everything up that i owned this morning and had like 5 ppl help me move out completely today. i would also like to take the full year of maternity leave because i want to be there with my daughter especially when her 1st birthday comes around because i know for sure ill be working that day if i went back early. anyway, yea i dunno i think im going to check into 'low income housing' or something like that, subsidised housing. im all really new to this but ill figure it out. :( wish me luck im officially now a single parent...

Diana - posted on 05/14/2010

All of the advice so far is good.

Barring abuse, I'd just caution you, that the first year after having a baby is the roughest on the couple. REALLY hard for us - both times. But SO worth sticking it out. As the father, you're always going to have him in your life in some way anyway.

Also, please make sure post-partum depression isn't coming in to play here either, as you are succeptible to it anytime up to a year after baby's birth.

Assuming you've considered the above, then I'm wondering if you can go back to work early? Also, why do you think you'll need welfare while you're getting mat pay - is that eligible in Alberta (I'm in BC) ? Or are you maybe not considering going back to work?

Good luck. I'm sure it's rough, but whatever road you carve out, I'm sure baby is all worth it :)

Valerie - posted on 05/14/2010

Hi Shylene,

I'm in Quebec, and there's plenty of help out here for single moms, includng super cheap daycare that you can get even before you find a job. I had a quick google and found that Alberta is not that different. There are subsodies for child care (daycare expenses) and tools to find a daycare. Poke around the site and you'll even find a family violence hotline. I'm not making any assumptions about your situation, but I'm sure they can help you plan your move, emergency financial assistance, housing, whatever. Check out this link from the gov. of Alberta:
http://www.child.alberta.ca/home/587.cfm
I hope this helps. Good luck to you and the little one.

Farah - posted on 05/14/2010

go stay with family or you can ask help from welfare

Sharon - posted on 05/14/2010

If this is an abusive relationship - contact womens shelters and local churches. File relevant police reports and criminal charges as applies.



If he's just neglectful then I foresee issues.



Get a job. Any job. If you don't, he looks like the better parent for having a responsible job.



And if he's abusive. Run woman run. Not to family, he'll find you. To a distant friend he doesn't know or know much about. Womens' shelters and churches can help you get established in a location. Not so much welfare as tips on how to find a job, good references, etc.

Katherine - posted on 05/14/2010

Do you have family that can help you? Or a good friend? I don't know what kind of help is available in Canada, but I would start googling....if you have no one else :(