Potty Training...HELLLLLLP!

Tisha - posted on 06/12/2010

I typed this for someone who has a boy so sorry it says he! I didn't want to retype the whole thing.

I worked in daycare for 11 years and here a a few tips that I learned. By the time I potty-trained my son I managed to do it in 1 week, the week after he turned 2. But, as you know all children are different and develop at different rates.

1. Signs that he is ready to potty train:
- He tells you when he has wet or had a bm in his diaper or he takes his diaper off
when he has wet/bm in his diaper.
- His diaper stays dry for at least an hour at a time.
- He shows interest in the toilet (Watches you when you go, asks questions) Playing in the bathroom is not showing interest!

2. Tips to help it go faster:
- Avoid pull-ups at all costs!!!!! Pull-ups are no different than diapers and children are smarter than you think. They know that if they use the bathroom in a diaper/pull-up it won't make a mess! Try to only use them at bedtime.
- Put him in underwear when he wakes up and keep him in them until its time for bed. Do not give up!
- If he goes in the toilet give him a reward (one skittle for pee two skittles for poop) and praise him. Sticker charts really don't work for kids this age. They need instant gratification.
- If he has an accident don't punish him or scold him. Just say pee-pee/poop goes in the potty. Don't tell him it's ok that he had an accident because then he will think it's ok to have an accident.
- Whatever you do, don't ASK him if he needs to go. Set a timer for 20 - 30 min. TELL him "When the bell rings it will be time to go potty." Then when the bells rings TELL him " It's time to go potty." Asking him if he wants to gives him the option to say no and makes him feel as if he has an option.
- Put cheerios or fruit loops in the toilet for him to aim at. You can also tell him to make bubbles in the toilet. Boys like it when they pee and it makes the little bubbles for some reason!
- Also, you can give him incentives like if he sits on the toilet without giving you a hard time about it he gets to pick out of the treasure box. Once he gets comfortable with sitting on the toilet you can then "wean" him off the incentives. Move it to he gets them if he pees/poops, once he gets peeing down pat, then he only gets them if he poops. (Or if he's like my son he might get pooping down first!) Once he goes a week or so with no accidents, stop giving him incentives. You don't want to have a 5 year old that still wants skittles every time he uses the potty!
- Most people teach their boys to sit first then stand. I make my boys sit backwards (straddle) the toilet when they are in the sitting stage. When they sit like this it automatically aims it into the toilet, they can see what they are aiming at better, and they are already used to facing that direction when you start teaching them to stand. (Many boys will go stand at the toilet, facing away from it, and go)! They also don't fall in as easily when they sit like this and they can hold on to the tank for balance. The only downfall to this method is you have to take their bottoms off completely every time they go.
- Finally, it can take up to 3 weeks for it to click. If after 3 weeks he still hasn't progressed I would take a break for a month or two. Trying to force kids to potty train when they aren't ready burns them out and makes them not want to mess with it. It can also cause incontinence.

I hope this helps. Sorry it was so long!!!!

Erica - posted on 06/12/2010

Do not buy pull ups. That makes it okay for her to go in her pants still. CONSISTENCY is key, like others have said. Clap like she just did the greatest thing in the world when she goes in the potty. Buy a potty that's her size and keep it out in the open. Once she understands that you "go" in the designated area, then you switch to the bathroom. Don't scold or be mean when she has an accident. That won't help. Ask her VERY often if she has to go and then take her over to the potty and have her try. You will learn as well as she that she needs to go at least every 2 hours for the first year or so. No diapers at night either. Buy a waterproof mattress pad or 2 and have her pee before she goes to bed and maybe wake her up once or twice during the night. Then have her pee again when she wakes up. Good Luck!!!!!

Roz - posted on 06/12/2010

Yes, she always tells me she made pee pee or boo boo after it happens. I think her actually seeing and wearing panties will motivate her. She loves the idea of doing what grown ups do! That's it, NO MORE DIAPERS....I'm going to take the plunge.

Thanks

Roz - posted on 06/12/2010

Thanks for the reply. She knows her body parts and uses the word vagina. She watches me ALL the time...in fact she hands me the toilet tissue. So this is why I believe she's ready, coupled with her constantly saying "I'm a big girl, no diapers". I let her run around diaper free at home in the morning and we've had a leaks. I feel somewhat optimistic because a couple of times it was near or in the bathroom,,,just not in the toilet. I use a child toilet seat instead of a potty, I was told that if I started with the toilet, to stick with it and not introduce the potty because she would more than likely view it as a toy.
In any event, I will continue with more optimism and patience!

Becca - posted on 06/12/2010

Whatever you do avoid using disposable training pants. Your child cannot tell that they are wet and will take a long time to train. A good cloth training underware is best.

Sherri - posted on 06/12/2010

I say set a timer for every 20 mins. Get rid of all diapers and/or pull ups. Keep her in undies except for bed time only. Have her sit on the potty (I never used a potty chair with any of my kids. I just think there Gross.) I got a insert to put on toilet so they didn't fall in. and sat them there for 1-3mins. If they went tons of praise, if they didn't a lot of its okay we will try again and a lot of we will make it next time hunny for accidents. Hopefully she is ready is she dry when she wakes up from naps, can she tell you before, during, or directly after going in her diaper? These are all signs she is ready. If not her little body may not be quite ready yet.

Patricia - posted on 06/12/2010

Make sure you have training pants or pullups on hand. Have her potty by your toilet. I suggest you have a squirt bottle on hand. {empty detergent bottle thoroughly rinsed with warm water in it) When I wanted to train my daughter (and sons) I took her to the potty sat her down and the squirted the warm water over her to simulate peeing. This and running water helps to get the flow going. If you take her every time you need to go and set her on her seat it will reinforce what you want to accomplish. You can say Mom's a big girl she went pee on the big potty. Have a seat for the toilet and a set of steps so she can use the big potty after she is successful with using her potty chair for a week or more. The most important thing is regular visits to the bathroom and praise and telling her she's a big girl with clappin , yea! If you set a timer to remind yourself to take her for regular potty checks it sets up a regular routine. The secret is lots of praise and no negative reactions for accidents. Lots of reassurance and it's okay if they have an accident you will make it to the potty the next time! If you have to start drinking lots of water yourself and make sure she has a lot to drink to get the kidneys full and get you both into the routine! You can do it Mom!!

Leila - posted on 06/12/2010

Its so difficult i hated this stage! I wasnt consistent at first whic made it worse! I got there in the end and just had her running around the house in her underwear and a top so she could go on the potty quickly. Awful as it sounds they need to experience a few accidents to realise they are not nice and to get to that potty before that happens. Good luck xx

Angela - posted on 06/12/2010

I know you probably don't want to hear this but there are no really fast solutions, potty training is an on going thing which takes time. First question to ask yourself is is your child ready to be potty trained? Has she seen you use the toilet and so know what it's for? Can she dress and undress herself? (i.e pull up/down pants) Does she know the names of the appropriate body parts? Putting pressure on your child to potty train before she is ready can be an unmitigated disaster.

First make sure you are ready to potty train. Choose a week to begin where you have little on so you can dedicate the first few days to potty training. Make sure you buy 2 pottys (1 for upstairs, 1 for down) and make sure they are the same colour and style. Also buy 10 pairs of pants. Keep a bucket with disinfectant handy and a mop in case of accidents. Also buy some fun soap and towels to teach about hand washing.

Start on the first day by explaining to your child that she is a big girl now and gets to wear grown up pants. Show her the pottys and explain what they are for. Leave off any trousers for the first day so she can get to grips with pulling her pants up and down. Then proceed to put her on the potty every 40 mins (more or less often if you think neccesary) or so. Keep the potty in whatever room she is in and keep books and toys handy for her to look at when she is on the potty. Sit her on it for about 10 mins, if she does anything then give her lots of praise but also praise her if she doesn't. After all, this is a big new thing for her and she'll need lots of encouragement. Be prepared for lots of accidents the first few days but don't get discouraged and definately don't tell her off or punish her. Just clean up her accidents and gently remind her to use the potty next time.

It can sometimes be useful to use a star chart the first few days to show when she goes and when she doesn't so you get a better idea of how often she needs to be put on the potty. Again make sure you give lots of praise and encouragement.

Make sure you still use diapers for naps and overnight. There are a few other things you can do. Buy a cushion with a removable washable cover and put a plastic bag on the cushion before you put the cover on. This can be your daughter's 'special cushion', put it on her car seat and buggy when you take her out. That way if she has an accident you can just take the cover off the cushion and wash it. Also don't forget when you do go out to take the potty and some changes of clothes.

Hopefully after a few days and some perseverence your daughter will get the hang of it, however if she gets stressed or isn't doing it after a week or so then go back to diapers for a couple of weeks. When she does go on the potty regularly then you can start to let her decide a bit more when she needs to go but make sure you gently remind her about the potty when she is busy or really engaged in something because she will likely forget.

Hope this helps, Good Luck!