Pregnant 66 year old...

Susana - posted on 06/17/2009

Ok so she desperatly wanted to be a mother, but does that give her the right to bring a child into the world when she knows she will not be around to see it grow up, and if she is around she will not have the energy to run around after a 10yr old at nearly 80.

She is a selfish person to have seeked medical help to get pregnant so late on in life, if her desire was to be a mother she shoud have seeked IVF earlier and not when she is old enough to be a granny. Money isn't the problem here, she seems like she is quite well off so what took her so long???

Abby - posted on 05/24/2009

i think it's a bit thoughtless! what if she only lives until she's 80? where does that leave that child? ok she may end up living til she's 150, but is that a chance she can risk, when a child is involved! i am 22 and am so glad i had my first son at 21. i think u need to give a child every chance u can to have a good life and a stable upbringing

Tanya - posted on 05/24/2009

Wow!! Hope that I have that kind of energy at 66 cause these kids take work!!!

Jaime - posted on 05/23/2009

Quoting Zoe:

Quoting Jennifer:

Quoting Esther:

Quoting Jennifer:

 

If you were this child in the future....would you rather never have been born at all, or would you rather have a long fulfilling life because someone was selfless enough to give it to you?

Try to look at it from both sides.

I would rather have my life, my children and their future....than to never have been here because my mom thought she was 'too old'.  As much as I would miss my 'older' mom....I would remember that one of the last things she did before leaving this earth, was to leave ME here.

What if this woman's son is the man that brings peace to the world?

And what if this woman's son is the next Jack the Ripper (thought I'd go with a UK figure) because his mom died when he was 6 years old. That is such a nonsensical argument.

And as for "nobody is guaranteed tomorrow", that's true, but the odds of a 28 year old having a few more tomorrows are far greater than those of a 66 year old.

It's a selfish act.

Alright, so what should be the cut off age for having children?  What's the top end number at which a woman should be told " No, you're not allowed...."? 

(.....and if there's a case of being 'too old'  then shouldn't there be a case of 'too young'? - who decides where that line is?)

 

 

Nodding here (along with Jennifer)... adoption agencies discriminate against people because of age, race, religion, weight, health, bank account, so forth and so on. Many will not let people over the age of 40 adopt or they use a combination of the couple's age (so it could be a 25yo wife and a 40yo husband and their combined age of 65 would rule them out for adoption). Or if one has diabetes or has had a heart attack that would rule them out. If one or the other is infertile due to a history of cancer the adoption agency could rule them out. And, yes, obesity could rule them out. Seriously... While it sounds warm and fuzzy and like an awesome solution, there are SO many problems with adoption (in addition to the cost) that it's not the answer for everyone. And I say this having many, many friends who have adopted. 

But, there are cases where baby girls are born without all or part of their reproductive organs or baby boys are born with undescended testicles ... would we really deny them the chance .. ANY chance at all, to become parents because of "nature"? I have a very difficult time with that argument. I truly do. Besides, I've always believed rather firmly that G-d blessed humans with the gifts and talents and wisdom to utilize some medical treatments and I consider some things like IVF to be among them. I really struggled with the decision to undergo fertility treatments and I also explored adoption and spoke with my friends who adopted and who tried to adopt and it was a very difficult decision to make. While some of my friends would never choose IVF or other forms of fertility treatments for themselves, they know what I went through and respect my choices and love my children and would not deny my right to make this decision.

It's disheartening to think that adoption has so much red tape, where impractical expectations are placed on the shoulders of prospective parents.  Jennifer made a good point about age limits if people believe this pregnancy is so selfish.  I find it interesting that many of the posters are hung up on this idea of 66 being an inappropriate, selfish age to have a child, but where do these ideas of inappropriate and selfish come from?  Certainly nature has not deemed Elizabeth Adeney to be of an inappropriate age to have a child, so why is it that society is so hell-bent on placing such moral restrictions on something that is the most natural act as far as a vast majority of living creatures on Earth?  I find it interesting to see the comments about the selfishness of this act...if that's the case, then we are all selfish for wanting to have a child because, as has already been mentioned, we don't know when we are going to die, so choosing to have a child at ANY age would be a selfish act if we cannot be absolutely, 100% certain that we will live as long as we feel is necessary for our child (for that matter, how can you even put a number on this...our children will need us forever--and no one lives forever!).  Life is lived on borrowed time and it's not the amount of time that matters, it's what we do with the time we are given.  Many, many, many years ago, young women at the age of 12 were having babies and living adult lives and although this is frowned upon in today's society, it's not completely impossible to imagine a young girl with a baby...because nature is what makes the ultimate decision...the evolution of our bodies is not something we can prevent because that is the very nature of the Earth, to grow and evolve.  In these same times, adults didn't usually make it past the age of 40, which was considered to be extremely old (today we consider this the age where men buy sports cars and women become cougars--lol).  Today men and women are living well into their 90's, which means that Elizabeth Adeney stands a great chance of living to see her child graduate University and even have a child or two of his own...I think that if Elizabeth wanted to take this chance, and felt confident enough in her decision to have a child, then she should be supported for her choice--not judged based on the ridiculous ideals of society.

Linda - posted on 05/23/2009

very well said i love your post!

Andrea - posted on 05/23/2009

she will be 84 when the child moves out... WOW

Linda - posted on 05/23/2009

wow 66? i could not do it nope i do give her lots of prayers and i hope the baby is normal and healthy when born, I am only in my 40's and i have grandkids that wear me out lol!

Jaime - posted on 05/23/2009

Quoting Janice:

Hey...you need to get in the real world!!! a woman of 66 does not have the stamina or energy to look after a baby!! and just think of the childs needs....will be like having your great grandmother taking you to schoo!!

It's interesting that you say "you need to get in the real world" because I'm very confident that this woman is living in the real world and experiencing a real pregnancy...I have not seen nor heard evidence that this is a virtual reality we are all commenting on.  And stating that a "woman of 66 does not have the stamina or energy to look after a baby" is not at all fact-based, because you have absolutely NO possible way of knowing these intimate details about Elizabeth Adeney.  Someone mentioned earlier that this really is no one's business but Elizabeth's...and if she's doing it for attention, so what, the only way it gets attention is through discussion forums and media frenzies that hype up the situation.  The bottom line is that she, as an active member of the human race, has secured the ability to grow a baby in her aging uterus and she plans to have this child and raise it for as long as she lives...this is something that ALL women that chose to be Mothers have in common.  I don't see how you or I are any different from her...sure, we're not 66---yet!

Tanya - posted on 05/23/2009

Quoting Diane:

I think this is a no no, y not adopt thier are plenty of kids out there that need help, this world is over populated as it is this is just gonna be another kid going into care and social services have enough of them!!!

I hear you on that but why not tell the crack feins that are allowed to repoduce at excelled amounts, or the mother's who lose custody and just keep having more, to stop having babies. how many kids have you adopted??

Tanya - posted on 05/23/2009

so, wow I have read some of these comments and can't believe some of them lol. First of all we are speaking about a woman that has had her career and life the way she wanted it, so now she is ready to be a mom! sometimes we as a society try to put every thing into a box! It's not that easy, who are we to judge that lady? She has every right to have a baby, and that baby will most likely lead a VERY nice life!! I see mother's daily that do not run around with their kids b/c they are over weight or tired from work, What were they thinking having kids? how selfish!!! No one can say anything about this lady she may very well live to be 120 in wich case her child will be 55 so, i think that the child will be fine! You go girl and have that baby, prolly be one of the best mom's ever. Patience is not a gift it is learned and i'm sure that @ 65 she has buckets of it!!!

Kat - posted on 05/23/2009

Quoting Candace:

It is entirely possible that this woman will still be healthy and active when her grandchildren are born. It is also possible that those of us who became parents in our 20's or 30's will be killed in a car accident or contract some horrible disease and die beofre our child's 10th birthday (I wouldn't hope this for anyone, but it is possible)

Here here!

Kat - posted on 05/23/2009

wow!

Rachel - posted on 05/22/2009

i think it is to old for her to have a child at her age and its not fair on the child to have a mother that will and might not keep up with them . its wrong and there are alot of younger women out there that should have children first not women old enough to be your grandparent .

Diane - posted on 05/22/2009

I think this is a no no, y not adopt thier are plenty of kids out there that need help, this world is over populated as it is this is just gonna be another kid going into care and social services have enough of them!!!

Candace - posted on 05/22/2009

Okay, no way I would want to be having a baby at 66. I think it is kind of nuts. But it was her choice. Alot of people are say it is irresponcible but we don't really know about her health. My 75 year old grandmother who has had both knees replaced keeps up with my 3 year almost as well as I can. My great-grandfather lived on his own and was active with his great-great-grandchildren untill the weeks before his death. He was just a few months short of 100 when he died. It is entirely possible that this woman will still be healthy and active when her grandchildren are born. It is also possible that those of us who became parents in our 20's or 30's will be killed in a car accident or contract some horrible disease and die beofre our child's 10th birthday (I wouldn't hope this for anyone, but it is possible) I think as long as she has carefully considered what will happen to the child if she becomes unable to care for him/her and has the child's prosective gaurdiens active in the child's life from the begining, more power to her. Godd Luck! I'm glad it's not me.

Diane - posted on 05/22/2009

I think this is a no no, y not adopt thier are plenty of kids out there that need help, this world is over populated as it is this is just gonna be another kid going into care and social services have enough of them!!!

Keigh - posted on 05/22/2009

Ohhhh my goodness!! I think that is the craziest story I've heard yet. Poor baby she wont be around for alot of his years. Hopefully she is around at least for his graduation, but that's pushing it cause she will be 84. She better start trying to find the fountain of youth!

Denise - posted on 05/22/2009

I do think it's selfish because she will not be able to provide the type of mothering that her child will need all through out their life,,,BUT let's remember that God creates a child, not us and he's got a plan for this baby. It's our job as a society to help each other, even when we don't agree with one another.

Zoe - posted on 05/22/2009

Quoting Cathy:

Lol! oooooKayyy? When do we suppose to go through menopausal age? at 70??

My mom went through menopause at age 32. Some women go through it sooner. I have a family history of early menopause and I'm actually the first woman that I can think of in my family to hit 40yo with my uterus and menstrual cycle in tact. So it can vary widely. Most women, I think, are premenopausal in their 40s and "officially" enter menopause in their 50s, though for some it happens later. There's a wide range of normal. 

Zoe - posted on 05/22/2009

Quoting Jennifer:

Quoting Esther:

Quoting Jennifer:

 

If you were this child in the future....would you rather never have been born at all, or would you rather have a long fulfilling life because someone was selfless enough to give it to you?

Try to look at it from both sides.

I would rather have my life, my children and their future....than to never have been here because my mom thought she was 'too old'.  As much as I would miss my 'older' mom....I would remember that one of the last things she did before leaving this earth, was to leave ME here.

What if this woman's son is the man that brings peace to the world?

And what if this woman's son is the next Jack the Ripper (thought I'd go with a UK figure) because his mom died when he was 6 years old. That is such a nonsensical argument.

And as for "nobody is guaranteed tomorrow", that's true, but the odds of a 28 year old having a few more tomorrows are far greater than those of a 66 year old.

It's a selfish act.

Alright, so what should be the cut off age for having children?  What's the top end number at which a woman should be told " No, you're not allowed...."? 

(.....and if there's a case of being 'too old'  then shouldn't there be a case of 'too young'? - who decides where that line is?)

 

 

Nodding here (along with Jennifer)... adoption agencies discriminate against people because of age, race, religion, weight, health, bank account, so forth and so on. Many will not let people over the age of 40 adopt or they use a combination of the couple's age (so it could be a 25yo wife and a 40yo husband and their combined age of 65 would rule them out for adoption). Or if one has diabetes or has had a heart attack that would rule them out. If one or the other is infertile due to a history of cancer the adoption agency could rule them out. And, yes, obesity could rule them out. Seriously... While it sounds warm and fuzzy and like an awesome solution, there are SO many problems with adoption (in addition to the cost) that it's not the answer for everyone. And I say this having many, many friends who have adopted. 

But, there are cases where baby girls are born without all or part of their reproductive organs or baby boys are born with undescended testicles ... would we really deny them the chance .. ANY chance at all, to become parents because of "nature"? I have a very difficult time with that argument. I truly do. Besides, I've always believed rather firmly that G-d blessed humans with the gifts and talents and wisdom to utilize some medical treatments and I consider some things like IVF to be among them. I really struggled with the decision to undergo fertility treatments and I also explored adoption and spoke with my friends who adopted and who tried to adopt and it was a very difficult decision to make. While some of my friends would never choose IVF or other forms of fertility treatments for themselves, they know what I went through and respect my choices and love my children and would not deny my right to make this decision.

Morag - posted on 05/22/2009

When I heard this, I'd just spent the night with a sick child and I was thinking...OMG at 66 I don't want to be doing this anymore. Its exhausting when I am young. The thing is this woman has never had a child before, no other siblings... I don't think she realises how much hard work is involved in having a kid... I mean how much does any new mother realise how hard motherhood is if they have never truly experienced babies/children? My mum had a couple of strokes when I was 13 years old, she was an older mother. I became her full time carer, as well as my handicapped siblings and it was so, so hard. While all my friends were out enjoying themselves, I was stuck at home changing nappies, cleaning and cooking. While it doesn't necessarily depend on age, you have to face facts that the older you are, the more likely you are to suffer serious health problems. There is more chance the child will become her carer or worse, bury a beloved parent before they reach adulthood.



In Spain courts would not automatically award custody to people of this age in custody cases, even if the parents have requested it. The court looks at the probability of the child becoming a carer etc. and put the best interests of the child first. While I too think she has the right to do what she wants, if she thinks she can cope, has she made her choice because she is lonely, feels she's missed out and now has no family connections...or did she think long and hard, thought she could give a good, safe life until they are old enough to leave home? None of us can say this for sure but at 66, there is less likelihood, life expectancy for women in the UK is currently 81/84 years



As a child carer, I don't begrudge my mother for it, but it wasn't fair and I felt like I lost my childhood, I never had any friends and it wasn't like I was teen mum who made a silly mistake, it was a responsibility I was expected to undertake... a difficult and lonely one. I wish that no other child would have to go through what I have.



at the end of the day, its not her choice that should be adhered to but whats in the best interest of the child. As long as she has made the necessay provisions so that child never becomes her carer and that someone who loves the child will adopt it in the event of her death, then that is what is important.

Zoe - posted on 05/22/2009

For all the people saying that a 66yo doesn't have the stamina or the energy or the whatever to look after a child... do they know this woman? I certainly don't. However, I DO know that there are women and men her age and older who are running marathons and trialthons all over the world which is something I cannot do at 40. When I take my children to the park, I see grandparents who are older than the age my parents would be who are running around with their grandchildren and they look FABULOUS and they're running around more than I am!



My grandfather died of a heart attack at the age of 37 leaving my grandmother a single parent to 6 children. They got married right out of high school, my grandfather went to work on the rail road full time and my grandmother worked part-time (in between having kids). Then he died suddenly and unexpectedly. My grandmother died at the age of 47. They died early even though they did it the "right" way according to many of you here, but there you have it.



Tomorrow is not promised for any of us, as some of us have pointed out in this thread. Really, how can we continue to make numerical age the criteria against which we determine fitness for someone's right to have a child?



Then some say it "goes against nature"... well, tornadoes, earthquakes, floods... those are all natural. Sometimes we human beings have to help things along and realize and utilize our G-d given gifts and talents to help things along. Hopefully we will use them for good and use them wisely. But to assume that "nature" is the be all and end all and to use that as an excuse just doesn't sit right with me.



I don't profess to know this woman or her life or what went into her decision making process. I can only make decisions for my life and my children based on what I know. I can take the information I have about my life and ask if it's something I would personally do, and that's just not relevant to HER and I can't use that information to pass judgment on her. It's not fair. I can sit back and say, "well, many people in my family die young so, hey, 66 means that she's already outlived most of 'em and she is living on borrowed time. But, hey, then again, I look at my great grandmother who lived into her 90s and this woman may have another 30 years left..." I don't have a crystal ball and I'm not queen. Again, I wish her well.

Rachel - posted on 05/22/2009

I think she is mad. Yeah she's 67 now but when her child is 13 she will be 80!! Can you imagine being a 13 year old at school with a mother who is older than most kids grandparents?!!! I'm 26 and my grandmother is 80. That is of course assuming she's still alive at all. Also obviously in order for theis to have happened she went abroad and used a sperm doner which means this child has no hope of ever having a father and it means that the child's future children are never going to have grandparents. It is also extremely unlikely this child will have any siblings so exactly how has this woman thought of her child before doing this?? There are good reasons why doctors won't do IVF on women over 50 and in the news report I read this woman said that "it is nobody's business, it is between myself, my doctor and my child" How has this chld been thought of?? I agree that age is irrelavent when it comes to having children. I know people who have had babies at the age of 15 and they are fantastic parents and I know others who have waited until they're in their 40's and they're not so great. It is about maturity, not age. This woman does not appear to have the maturity to understand the hardships this child will face because of her decision. She may feel like she's 35 but she isn't. She should have got a couple of cats for company.

Megan - posted on 05/21/2009

more power to her...

i just hate that she'll be 86 when her child is 20...poor kid.



i hope she doesnt pass on soon so her child can have a mother for as long as possible.

Denise - posted on 05/21/2009

good for her. maybe she will stay in good health and be able to take care of her baby. they say babies make you feel younger. but there is one question? what happened to menopause?

Cassandra - posted on 05/21/2009

That's a bummer because i just know how I am with my son and he loves how I try to go on any activity that he goes it keeps me young and I know he loves spending time with me rather than some stranger that can keep up with him. I have a 9 yr old but wish I could have been blessed with at least another child my son said he would even help raise the child how sweet is that he wants a sibling so bad and he would be such a careful brother but for some reason its not meant to be however i feel if you're going to have a child late in the years just try to keep up with them. I f you bring a child into this world do it thinking you will be in their lives don't be selfish think of the long run of the child's life. It definitely is a challenge, but everyday he tells me how much he is thankful to have me and all i can think is how great is it to have a child so great as him, so innocent and caring that he already at nine to be that man to put his selfishness aside for his mother. It just amazes me how great is he to have changed my life around If it weren't for my son I would not be the proud and wise person I am today

Kate - posted on 05/21/2009

First of all there is no way she conceived naturally. I mean come on she most likely got donated egg and sperm to become pregnant which technically are not biologically hers. She is carrying the child, Yes and is going to be the parent, but is this fair to the child? I can't believe a doctor would do this just like with octomom. Oh well it all comes down to the almighty dollar. Which is really really awful how people are these days.

Sarah - posted on 05/21/2009

i think that if she cant have babies naturally because she has gone through menopause that is her body saying no more babies it is too late i was raised by my grandparents and it was the most boring life because they couldn't come outside and play with us the only thing that kept me sane was having my brother and this woman will have one that poor child it is too old and that's it her body has shown it is too old by going through menopause that is why she had to use donated egg and sperm. and just think she will be 87 when her child will be 20 that is older than my grandparents are and im 20.

Sandi - posted on 05/21/2009

I was 42 when I adopted my son , # 4 and it has been hard raising him so far, I'm 51 now and I wouldn't want to take care of a baby but to each his or her own. Also, she may have made arrangement for care of the child upon her death both emotionally and financially.

Melissa - posted on 05/21/2009

me personally i think she should go through and have the baby and give it up for adoption, even if it is to another family member or open adoption because she won't be able to do it on her own. If she is thinking in the best interest of the child that would be the smart thing to do. Someone i worked got pregnant at 41 and had a cow because she didn't want to be 61 with a 20 year old, but it was natural and a mistake, but she dealt with it, and is raising it. But she is also 41, and 41 is a lot different then 66.

Bridgette - posted on 05/21/2009

I think if she is wanting to have a baby at 66 Good for her!

Paula - posted on 05/21/2009

W O W! Cogats.! Better you than me, that's all I've got to say.



God Bless and Good Luck

Cierra - posted on 05/21/2009

i cant imagine giving birth at that age. . . good luck to her, but i hope she has a good plan. . .who is going to take care of that child when she is bed ridden and cant even make it to the bathroom? is that fair to the child? did she get pregs the good old fashioned way or is this one of these horrible artificial my dr. wants to be on the news kinda babies? i think if its the latter its horribly unethical. . .

Cierra - posted on 05/21/2009

i cant imagine giving birth at that age. . . good luck to her, but i hope she has a good plan. . .who is going to take care of that child when she is bed ridden and cant even make it to the bathroom? is that fair to the child? did she get pregs the good old fashioned way or is this one of these horrible artificial my dr. wants to be on the news kinda babies? i think if its the latter its horribly unethical. . .

Deborah - posted on 05/21/2009

no l dont think she should have had a baby at that age .l think she is to old. whats going to happen to that child when she dies she 66 to old for me sorry

Deborah - posted on 05/21/2009

no l dont think she should have had a baby at that age .l think she is to old. whats going to happen to that child when she dies she 66 to old for me sorry

Jennifer - posted on 05/21/2009

the medical risks of having children when you are 66 are very high. she is not only endangering her childs life, but she is putting her own at risk. what happens if she doesn't make it through the labor. her child is left without a mother. and what happens when her child goes off to college. her mother is going to be in her mid 80's. she prob wont even be around to see her get married. being a nursing student who just finished my maternity rotation...i personally think the risks are too high.

Kirsty - posted on 05/21/2009

well i think it depends on her health, but it is kinda selfish. i mean my birth mum had a baby ay 41 and she couldnt handle it at all, me and my sister had to look after her most of the time and i was 18 and my other sister was 13 at the time. its just the thought of the woman dying pretty soon, its guna be very upsetting for that child! but good luck to her!

Emma - posted on 05/21/2009

I can understand her want for a child but i also think that women that age cannot have children naturally for a reason. I hope for her childs sake that she stays fit and healthy long enough to bring him or her up and guide him or her through growing up properly.

Laura - posted on 05/21/2009

Just some more info about older woman giving birth... Here is a story I ran across...A 66-year old Romanian woman gave birth to a child... Read more at this link:



http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/417905...

Laura - posted on 05/21/2009

Quoting Heather:

Quoting Esther:

Quoting Jennifer:

I believe that everyone who is against this should just worry about your own life and let this woman live hers. We are all fools to ever believe that we as humans have anything to do with creating life and if God wants this child to exist then that is why this child will exist. Let's all remember Abraham and Sarah. God chose to make her wait until she was in her 90's to have her baby. I say God bless and good luck to her and the baby and don't worry about everyone else!

If you follow that reasoning then I assume you believe that God wants kids to be abused, wanted those people to die on 9/11, wants people to die in Darfur etc. Maybe sometimes things happen that God didn't sign off on.

I think your going over the top with what Jennifers point is your taking it to the extreme completely and ignorantly

Was thinking the same thing as you, Heather...

Heather - posted on 05/21/2009

Quoting Esther:

Quoting Jennifer:

I believe that everyone who is against this should just worry about your own life and let this woman live hers. We are all fools to ever believe that we as humans have anything to do with creating life and if God wants this child to exist then that is why this child will exist. Let's all remember Abraham and Sarah. God chose to make her wait until she was in her 90's to have her baby. I say God bless and good luck to her and the baby and don't worry about everyone else!

If you follow that reasoning then I assume you believe that God wants kids to be abused, wanted those people to die on 9/11, wants people to die in Darfur etc. Maybe sometimes things happen that God didn't sign off on.

I think your going over the top with what Jennifers point is your taking it to the extreme completely and ignorantly

Heather - posted on 05/21/2009

Quoting Laura:

Quoting Joy:

Quoting Amanda:

My mother will be 77 in June and I'm 23.....you do the math. My father died when I was six and she raised me alone, my teen years hit when she was in her late 60s/early 70s. Trust me, I've seen it first hand that older mothers can do it as well as younger mothers. I am a mother now and I just pray I can be there as much as she was. She never missed ANYTHING at our school, church, or social events. Many of my friends moms were lucky to make it to 10 things our whole childhood.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate your post Amanda.  It's nice to hear a young perspective on what it was like to have an "older" mom.  You don't seem scarred for life or like you missed out on a single thing with your mom.   My mom was 40 when she had me, and while I can't say she did a fine job raising me (that's another story), I can also say that I was never embarrassed because of her age or that she looked older than the other moms.  She gave me plenty of OTHER reasons to be embarrassed of her....lol  But age wasn't one of them.

THANK YOU TO BOTH OF YOU. I can relate to the "older" mom part. And what you said, Joy, about our mothers giving us plenty of other reasons to be embarrassed of her, but age wasn't one of them.

 

My mom had me at 37 years old, one of my brothers at 39, and the other at 43. My little brother is not lacking in anything. Its quite the reverse. My mother gave him more attention and did more things with him than any of the other children. We had a probably of too much "mothering and babying" in this case. My mom had a total of ten kids, and she seems fine. We didn't lack anything materialistic wise. My life story has a more emotional twist/social standing...

 

So age is really just a number.

THIS IS MY EXACT POINT here are stories of women that came out just fine with older parents age is just a number what I have to say is YOU GO GIRL!!!!!! and congratulations!

Heather - posted on 05/21/2009

I dont think its really anyones OPINION that really matters I think its a womens choice when and where to have a baby yes it will be harder but how is to say any of us are any better of mothers because we are in our 20s or 30s maybe she will be a better mother than anyone on here so the negative comments about being responsible really shouldnt be u either agree or disagree but i think judging is not the purpose for this forum for circle of moms its to SUPPORT and ASK questions not judge!

Laura - posted on 05/21/2009

Quoting Joy:

Quoting Amanda:

My mother will be 77 in June and I'm 23.....you do the math. My father died when I was six and she raised me alone, my teen years hit when she was in her late 60s/early 70s. Trust me, I've seen it first hand that older mothers can do it as well as younger mothers. I am a mother now and I just pray I can be there as much as she was. She never missed ANYTHING at our school, church, or social events. Many of my friends moms were lucky to make it to 10 things our whole childhood.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate your post Amanda.  It's nice to hear a young perspective on what it was like to have an "older" mom.  You don't seem scarred for life or like you missed out on a single thing with your mom.   My mom was 40 when she had me, and while I can't say she did a fine job raising me (that's another story), I can also say that I was never embarrassed because of her age or that she looked older than the other moms.  She gave me plenty of OTHER reasons to be embarrassed of her....lol  But age wasn't one of them.

THANK YOU TO BOTH OF YOU. I can relate to the "older" mom part. And what you said, Joy, about our mothers giving us plenty of other reasons to be embarrassed of her, but age wasn't one of them.

My mom had me at 37 years old, one of my brothers at 39, and the other at 43. My little brother is not lacking in anything. Its quite the reverse. My mother gave him more attention and did more things with him than any of the other children. We had a probably of too much "mothering and babying" in this case. My mom had a total of ten kids, and she seems fine. We didn't lack anything materialistic wise. My life story has a more emotional twist/social standing...

So age is really just a number.

Keisha - posted on 05/21/2009

Extremely selfish and irresponsible is all I have to say!

Joy - posted on 05/21/2009

Quoting Amanda:

My mother will be 77 in June and I'm 23.....you do the math. My father died when I was six and she raised me alone, my teen years hit when she was in her late 60s/early 70s. Trust me, I've seen it first hand that older mothers can do it as well as younger mothers. I am a mother now and I just pray I can be there as much as she was. She never missed ANYTHING at our school, church, or social events. Many of my friends moms were lucky to make it to 10 things our whole childhood.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate your post Amanda.  It's nice to hear a young perspective on what it was like to have an "older" mom.  You don't seem scarred for life or like you missed out on a single thing with your mom.   My mom was 40 when she had me, and while I can't say she did a fine job raising me (that's another story), I can also say that I was never embarrassed because of her age or that she looked older than the other moms.  She gave me plenty of OTHER reasons to be embarrassed of her....lol  But age wasn't one of them.

Amanda - posted on 05/21/2009

My mother will be 77 in June and I'm 23.....you do the math. My father died when I was six and she raised me alone, my teen years hit when she was in her late 60s/early 70s. Trust me, I've seen it first hand that older mothers can do it as well as younger mothers. I am a mother now and I just pray I can be there as much as she was. She never missed ANYTHING at our school, church, or social events. Many of my friends moms were lucky to make it to 10 things our whole childhood.

Maggie - posted on 05/21/2009

i think that it amazing that at 66 she can still reproduce. do i think it wise for her at her age to be pregnant... no. simply because of the complications that would come with a woman her age, not to mention that she may not live long enough to see her son or daughter grauate high school, get married, have kids etc. however, i am not one to judge so the best of luck to her and her family. i hope they all do well.

Zenovia - posted on 05/21/2009

I'm currently caring for my aged mother (my father passed away 2 years ago and I was caregiving for him too). It's not a matter of can the mother handle it, it's what position are you putting your child in when the roles reverse and in the case of a 66 year old, that could be sooner than later. I can barely manage my young family and my mother's needs. My mother had me late in life and expects me to devote the same amount of time to her caregiving needs as someone who is 65 and retired with grown children. She doesn't understand why I can't take off work or have someone else deal with my children while I deal with her. Now, does this elderly woman having this baby really believe that she is capable of dealing with teenage generational issues when she's 80? I think not, based on the majority of 80 year olds I know today. My friend is 63 and was caring for her 14 year old grandson because his mother was unable to...it's been nothing short of a disaster and I know this woman is a good mother and grandmother, she just cannot deal with today's 14 year old issues. People need to give their head a shake and stop being so selfish....I want a baby....I deserve a baby....I demand a baby... who cares what the ramifications are for the baby.