raising a happy secure 13 year old boy being a single mom

Dena - posted on 05/15/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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hello Im new here. I divorced my sons dad 8 years ago. My 13 yr old boy has always been very athletic and respectful... he has been raised well, but recently has been getting kinda short with our conversations and crabby. Im concerned about him being rude and lacking homework responsiblities.

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Jodi - posted on 05/15/2012

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Hi Dena,
That sounds fairly normal, I know what you mean. Teenagers can tend to get a little moody. I think it is important when they get like that to understand they often don't realise they were short with you, or came across as a bit moody. I find that often, just reminding them to be respectful please, just in a normal tone of voice, seems to wake them up to themselves.

Can I suggest reading the book "Raising Boys" by Steve Biddulph (sp?). It helped me to better understand raising a boy, particularly the way their hormones work, and also how to redirect their energies. One of the things that really stood out to me was a comment about parents having to be their brain for a couple of years. This may be the issue you are having with homework. I found the same problem with my son, and understanding the reasons for it meant I was far less frustrated, and was able to help him organise himself in a way that worked for him.

Just to offer you hope, my son is now almost 15 and is coming out the other side :)

Louise - posted on 05/15/2012

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Welcome to puberty! He will have some major strops for the next two years and you will have to decide what you are willing to let slide and what it is worth a row about. Try and keep him focused on his sports and gently push the homework as well. It will help if he gets into something new life Karate or Judo to let out some pent up agression safely.

this is nothing you have done or said it is just the start of a right to passage into manhood!

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