ASHLEY - posted on 10/13/2010 ( 24 moms have responded )
I no longer want to be my sister's guardian...
She is my half sister we have different fathers. My dad past away but both her father and mother are still alive and in contact with us. She even visits my mom on the weekends! Her dad lives out of state but is engaged and apparently doing well. I am 22 an have been married for 3 years I am also 6 months pregnant with my 2nd child my oldest is 14 months. Basically I have had "temporary guardianship" for 3 years and was caring for her before that although i was under age... we had just been returned to my mother after 4 years in foster care when she went to prison for a DUI / leaving the scene of an accident. She was gone for 2 years and I cared for my sister during that time although her boyfriend had custody on paper. When I was 19 she was released and I had guardianship transfered to me (anything to keep my sister from returning to foster care) it was supposed to be temporary (2-3 months) while my mother got resettled now 3 years later she has no plans to regain custody and my husband and i are stuck taking care of a now 13 yr old in addition to our own kids even though she has two able parents now. I don't want to do it anymore. It would be different if they had past away but I talk to both of them almost everyday & they both have normal stable lives now (the dad better off than mom) I should have never ended up in this situation to begin with but now feel selfish for wanting to give up guardianship. I do not want her in a foster home (she always has a home with us) but I feel like her parents won't step up as long as they think I'm am willing to raise her for them. HELP! also if anyone has experience with such a unique situation please share. Legally I am not even sure how to go about getting her back with one of her parents. But if they are both around why shouldn't she be living with them? Like i said I am only 22 and my sister is 13 I am not ready to raise a teenager and I feel helpless like I was conned by my mom.
LET ME CLEAR UP A FEW THINGS...
I am not returning her to foster care I am only encouraging the idea of reuniting her with one of her parents. Of course she will stay with me if she cannot return to one of them. You people honestly thought I meant giving her up completely?
I have discussed this with her and she wants to pursue the possibilty of living with her dad. She actually felt bad telling me she would like to be with him she thought it might hurt MY feelings. I realize now I didn't need to ask this question I know my sister better than anyone and I would never want to hurt her and I haven't. She is excited to possibly be in his wedding and have a father and step mom (and be an only child lol) thanks for your opinions though it did help me. I appreciate any further comments as well. I feel a lot better going forward with this now.